After the Kaijong couple became official, Myungsoo and Sungjong drove even further apart. Not only did Myungsoo not touch him offstage but onstage as well, just like Sungjong wanted. INFINITE members noticed this and decided to do something about it for the first time.

 

They didn't know completely what happened between the two youngest but something for sure was going on. They noticed at first the shy hidden glances that they sent and tried to hide. They noticed how suddenly Sungjong stopped with these side glances and turned into glares every time Myungsoo even made eye contact with him. They weren't stupid but they did decide to leave it until now, before it could become a bad situation.

 

It was planned out by no other than the mastermind Sungyeol. Sungjong usually takes a bath at 7:00 PM when they don't have no schedules in Sungyeol's room. The only room that had a bathtub belonged to Sungyeol. When he takes a bath Sunyeol will send Myungsoo to get something from his room. Then and there they will move a huge drawer in front of the door to prevent anyone that was inside to get out. Sungyeol was clearly the smart one.

 

It worked and now there was an angry Sungjong banging on the door and a Myungsoo looking sadly at Sungjong.

 

Does he not want to be with me that badly?

 

"Hyungs! This is not funny let me out! I need to change, please."

 

He begged but it was pointless. His hyungs had left. Sungjong didn't really need to change either, like any other person he brings his change of clothes inside the restroom with him, he was grateful he did that too.

 

He finally gave up and slumped down on the floor exhausted.  

 

Silence. No one said anything.

 

Sungjong didn't say anything because he didn't feel like anything should be said.

Myungsoo didn't say anything because he was afraid on how Sungjong will answer.

 

But wasn't it because of cowardliness that he lost Sungjong forever?

 

He can't hate me more than he already does.

 

And with this thought he decided to speak up.

 

"Sungjong, why do you hate me so much? Was it my confession? If it's just my confession then lets pretend it did not happen and go back to how we used to be."

 

Sungjong sighed. He was frustrated it with it all.

 

"If I tell you, will you not bother anymore? Do you promise?"

 

Myungsoo hesitated but this was his only chance to know the truth. " I promise."

 

And with that Sungjong began explaining.

 

"Did you know I loved you for three years?" He looked at Myungsoo who nodded. "I tried sending you hints but you didn't notice them or didn't care-"

"That's not it."

"Don't interrupt me or I will not explain anymore." He sent a warning glance meaning he was serious and continued. "I confessed to you and you clearly rejected me. I cried and I was depressed for days until Jongin and Taemin came in and made me forget. I was happy hanging out with different people other than you and I was okay with your rejection."

 

He stood up and walked to the window and looking at the outside. It was dark outside and the sky was filled with dark grey clouds.

 

"But suddenly you confessed to me right when I was starting to be happy again, I was mad and ran away that day." He raised his voice, his voice full of hatred. "Days later after much thought and sleepless nights, I decided to tell you that I loved you too but the day I did I saw you and you looked healthy like always. I looked at myself and I was the opposite, I looked horrible with dark circles and swollen eyes. Unlike you, my complexion wasn't good at all. That is when I realized that you didn't care as much as I did. You never did. You were everywhere though, everything reminded me of you. Luckily Jongin got even closer to me and literally saved me. Don't I deserve to be happy for once in my lifetime?"

"That's not how it went at all Sungjong. I do-"

"You said you wouldn't bother me anymore. I hope you keep your promise."

With that he opened the window that the mastermind forgot to lock and jumped out. He landed safely. Thunder was heard and rain started pouring. 

 

Myungsoo went looking for Sungjong because he thought that Sungjong needed him. 

 

-Flashback-

"I love you Myungsoo."

Weird time for a confession but he felt warm in his embrace at this moment. Watching a movie, sharing a blanket and feeling protected while thunder and rain was heard outside. Maybe the feelings were mutual.

 

I love you too. More than a friend Sungjong.

 

"I love you too Sungjong. Don't tell the other members but you are my favorite member out all of them. You are a nice friend who is always there to make me smile. Thank you."he said sincerely.

 

Sungjong stayed silent. He was rejected. Myungsoo only liked him as a friend and he was a fool to think otherwise. "Your welcome." He said holding back tears. " I'm sleepy, I'm going to go my bed and sleep now." He stood up and emotionlessly walked to his room.

 

I guess I was wrong to have my hopes up, it was just a casual 'I love you'.I saved myself from embarrassment at least .

 

Thought Myungsoo.

.

.

.

He stared in disbelief. He was finally given a chance to shine.

 

"You are excused."

 

The three boys excited the boss's office. The other two boys who were already acquainted with each other, they were best friends, stopped and smiled at Sungjong.

 

"We will need to meet up and practice. What if we start tomorrow?Are you busy?"

"Tomorrow sounds fine. See you then. I need to go now and practice with the INFINITE members. Bye." They waved at each other and Sungjong left.

 

He was a bit nervous but happy at the same time. They were giving him an opportunity, finally. At the end of the year the 3 of them will do a special stage at a very important concert and in February they will be releasing a mini album as a collaboration. The companies thought it was a good idea since three popular group members were going to get together. The main focus was going to be dancing.

.

.

For the next few weeks Sungjong had gotten almost completely over the rejection. He was happy and enjoyed spending time with his new two friends. They grew very close and started to hang out more often, not just to practice. Sungjong spent less time at the dorms and Myungsoo was getting a bit jeaoulus that his Sungjong was hanging out with other people more, than spending time with him like he always did.

 

Sungjong was about to head out but Myungsoo stopped him.

 

"Where are you going?"

"Out." He said with a blank expression.

 

He hated it. What happened to the Sungjong that was always smiling when he talked to him? Who laughed for the simplest comment. He missed it.

 

He put his shoes on and was about to open the door but Myungsoo suddenly grabbed his wrist.

 

Sungjong looked at his hyung with a confused expression.

"Do you need anything, L hyung?" 

 

L -hyung?

 

"Don't go" It was barely audible, "Stay here...with me."

"Sorry but I promised Taemin and Jongin that I will meet up with them today. Don't worry, everyone else will arrive in a bit."

 

Sungjong released himself from Myungsoo's grip and was once again preparing to go out but...

"SO YOU ARE CHOOSING THEM OVER ME? Why did you change Sungjong?!"

"What?" He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Yes he loved him but is he telling him what to do?

"I love you Lee Sungjong. More than just a friend."

 

Seriously? So unfair.

 

He didn't know what to think right now. Should he be happy or angry? He didn't know what to do and made up a third option. He decided to run.

 

What did I just do?

.

.

.

Days later after sleepless nights, he decide to confront Myungsoo. Tomorrow.

 

INFINITE had a fan meeting that day. Sungjong side glanced at Myungsoo who was right next to him. 

 

That is when it hit him.

 

Look at him. He looks happy and normal, looking at the camera and occasionally smiling.

 

An image of him in the morning while brushing his teeth looking at the mirror flashed through his head.

 

He smiled. He doesn't care...then why should I.

 

Isn't Myungsoo's stoic face what makes it all the more frustrating? Because currently Myungsoo was an emotional mess but didn't show it on the outside.

.

.

.

Everyone had left for individual activities the next day and he was left alone at the house. After the last person left he locked the door and let it all out. 

 

Last time. He promised himself.

 

He cried aloud continuously. Holding his arm to his chest and hitting it because it hurt. He suddenly heard the sound of thunder and jumped a little. Then a creepy smile creeped up his face because an idea suddenly popped up.

 

Impatiently he opened the door and when the hard pouring rain hit him, he felt pleasure from the pain.

.

.

.

The rain had stopped now but he was still outside sitting on the ground, hugging his knees to his chest  and rocking back and forth. He was staring at nothing for a few hours and suddenly started to feel lighten head...he out.

 

"Sungjong!" The man was shaking him but Sungjong did not respond.

 

He checked if the dorm room was open but luck was not on his side. He decided to take him to his dorm. With that he carried him to the his car. 

.

.

.

Sungjong's head was hurting and the voices were not helping

"Stop talking." He mumbled.

 

The man went instantly to Sungjong.

"Sungjong are you okay?"

"Mmm...Jongin?"

 

"I'll call s and tell them he is here" and Sehun left the room.

 

Sungjong sat straight up realizing he wasn't home. Bad idea because his head hurt and lied back down.

 

"Are you okay?"

he nodded his head since his throat felt a bit dry.

"Here some water." Sungjong got the glass of water and drank from it.

"So are you going to tell me what happened."

Sungjong doesn't know what he was thinking and ended up telling Kai about Myungsoo. Kai was now comforting Sungjong and whipping his tears.

"You know, that doesn't explain why I found you soaking wet...unconscious."

"Ugh because did you know I was afraid of rain? Only Myungsoo knew about this and most of the time he was always there when it was raining. I thought that if I could go in the rain then all the memories and his touches will wash away. Also, because I need to get over my fear...and can you stop asking questions. I'm tired."

 

He lied back down and closed his eyes.

"Wait one last question."

He didn't hear a complaint and continued.

"Did you get over your fear?"

 

Sungjong smiled,"...No."

-End of flashback-

 

Where are you Sungjong?

 

And where was Sungjong? He was with his new protector.

 

 

A/N- So yeah...sorry for bad grammar and what not. I know that I have a lot of run-ons and stuff but I'll fix it later. 

Before posting this chapter I had prepared a big huge speech for  my author's note, but I forgot it :(