I didn't know how long we stood there just looking at each other, trying to find the right words to make the conversation before Kai finally opened his mouth.
"Sunny, I think your phone is buzzing.."
I cursed him in my head, of course I heard it. I just didn't want to look at it and break the mood.
"Ah.. hm, yeah I should check that.." I replied, faking the confusion.

It was a text from M4gic's manager telling me they were finally free to meet me.
"Alright it's my cue to go.. Let's catch up later okay??" I asked. Kai rubbed his neck and nodded.
I said goodbye to the rest of the gang and headed towards the exit. As I was almost up to the elevator I heard Chanyeol and Xiumin calling my name. The giant straight up hugged me and lifted me off the ground.
"Uhhh Chan-chanyeol what are you doing..??"
"I'm properly saying hello welcome back" He replied as Xiumin was trying to put me down .
"Chanyeol-ahhh let her go!" Xiumin mumbled.
"Nahh I think she's great up here" replied Chanyeol, perfectly content with himself.
"Okay please guys, I have a meeting to attend" as I was slapping Chanyeol's in order to make him let go. After 5 minutes of them treating me like an helium balloon he finally put me down.
"Alright we said hello, can I go now" I scoffed, smoothing out my shirt.
"No you mphmmh" Chanyeol tried to finish his sentence but Xiumin pressed his hand on his mouth.
"Yes you can.. Sorry about that. We're just..you know, happy to see you're okay" He added. They both looked at me with a serious face.
"Uh..ok..guys no." I said.
It was weird somehow, to see the same look they had 4 years ago when everything started. Xiumin backhugged me and rested his chin on my shoulder. I stared blankly at Chanyeol.
"If you're trying to comfort me.. That's really unnecessary. I'm okay now.." Xiumin tightened his hug. I know he didn't want to speak , he just wanted to let me know they were there.
Chanyeol took his cap off . "I knew something was off when you left without saying goodbye." I felt Xiumin nodding. "When Suho came up to tell us it was because of your family, we knew something was wrong. You know , we still remember, right..? We never thought it would have gone so far.."
"I .. really need to go guys.." I didn't want all this to came back right now. I could feel the guilt dripping off them and I felt bad for not saying anything reassuring.
"We should have helped you" Xiumin continued. "You were always there to cheer us up when we went through bad times.. and because you were like a sister, we took you for..granted? And yet we didn't protect you this time.."
I stepped back, forcing Xiumin to let go.
"Boys , what are you doing right now?" I asked before sighing loudly. They opened their mouth but I put my hands on both of them to make them shut up.
"4 years ago, I didn't ask for anyone's help. It was my fault, not yours alright? Not yours. And shhh no don't talk, I'm not done. It is now over and I'm sorry if I made you carry that guilt for this long. Millions of things could have been done with "what ifs".. What is done is done, it was never your fault, it was their fault. Also, YOU CAN PASS THIS MESSAGE TO THE REST OF THE GANG OKAY" I said before smacking their foreheads with my hands.
I walked up to the elevator when the doors finally opened.
"Though I'm kind of impressed you kept this from Kai all this time" I added, waiting to push a button. Chanyeol shrugged.
"I'm impressed too to be honest. But the day he's going to know.."
"..He's probably going to hate us.maybe." Xiumin finished.
"Nahh. He won't. Plus we're not there yet.." I said.
"Come eat with us tonight , if you can alright??" Chanyeol asked using his puppy eyes.
"We'll see about that!!" I replied as the doors were closing on me.

I waited for them to shut before leaning my head on the wall and relieving a big sigh. I was wondering if all my acquaintances and friends here were going to give me the same treatment. I considered all of this in my past and yet since I've been back everyone had been pulling me back into it. I guess the only one who never mentioned anything was Kai.. but considering he didn't know the truth, it didn't really matter in the end. I looked at my reflection on the metalic door.
I was grateful for them to be worried but truthfully I wanted my comeback to be a new start.

When I reached the dancing room the four boys politely bowed and introduced themselves. The 17 years old maknae started first.
"I'm Park Woo Bin , I'm 17 years old and I'm from Busan" he announced.
"I'm Jung Mika, I'm 19 years old and I'm from Haringey" he replied in a perfect korean.
"I'm the leader Kim Jin , I'm 20 years old and I'm from Camden" he stated.
"I'm Choi Il Sung , I'm 18 years old and I'm from Daegu" he said after bowing again.
"We are M4gic! Please take care of us" They all shouted before bowing.
The manager's cellphone rang and he excused himself before rushing out of the room.  They all stood there not knowing where to look. Their presentation was very mechanic like, showing no signs of warmth or friendliness. They looked intimidated somehow and I didn't know if it was because I was a woman or just simply because they were new to this.

"Nice to meet you guys! Well you may already know my name, I'm Sun and I'll be your choreographer" I said cheerfully, bowing down as well." Alright so I watched your tapes and.." I stopped myself from talking just because I couldn't take the stiffness and the awkwardness that was filling the room.
"You guys..We are not going to work well together if you're that tensed up" 
"Ah we know you who are. You're the girl who quitted." Il Sung snapped.
That little brat! Like a punch in the stomach, I was expecting everything but that.
"Il Sung-shi.." Woo Bin whispered. Jin smacked the 18 years old boy's head before bowing. "We are sorry for his rudeness. It won't happen again"
"Yah , you punk, I'm your sunbae and you still need to respect me" I said, quitting my formal tone. The boys all looked at me with widened eyes.
I've worked with kids tougher than him, there was no way I'd let him intimidate me.
"I agreed to work with you, I'm giving you my time , I'm not gonna let a fetus ruin that, are we clear?" I stated, arms crossed.
I could see Woo Bin trying really hard to keep his composure while all he wanted to do is make fun of his hyung.
"Whatever" Il Sung retorted.
"Yah Il Sung , stop this now!" the leader growled. 
"Okay we are not having a great start.." I paused " I'll be right back" I added. The anxiety was distorting the other boys faces.
I left the room with my phone pressed on my ear "Hi I'd like to make an order" . I ran into the manager on my way out and asked him to give me more time alone with the boys. He was reluctant at first but shrugged and accepted.

 

I went back to the room 15 minutes later with M4gic, still being where I left them. They were mortified and it looked like Il Sung got scolded by s. Yet he still refused to look at me.
"Sorry it took longer than I expected" I explained, dropping off plastic bags with buckets filled with hot fried chicken on the ground. If there was one thing I learned during my trainee years is that nothing soothed more a hard working rookie's heart  than food.

"Now sit down and eat" I ordered. They obeyed, confused. "This is what we're going to do, you eat, you tell me about yourself, you tell me what you're looking for the most in dancing; you tell me what you'd like to do in your future choreographies and you bust out your best move. Is that okay with all of you?" 

"Yes!" Woobin , Jin and Mika replied cheerfully, as they were finally starting to loosen up.
"Is that okay with you, your highness" I asked il Sung. He shrugged and bit into his chicken. I knew I somehow trespassed the boundaries but I knew it wouldn't get out of this room.
"Good, now we only get an hour and a half, so let's make it productive" I proposed before sitting next to the leader and feeding myself with the chicken.

____________________________________

Oh my lord, LONG TIME NO SEE. I APOLOGIZE o<-<
so yeah those new members are totally made from scratch tho. I was hesitating between picking up boys from different Kgroups and inventing ocs so yeah.. I prefer to let
you guys imagine them o//
Took me some time to come back here. I'll try to be around a bit more! Thank you for those who are still here and those who suscribed to me (like really wow thanks)