Shout out to hunhanoppa for giving me the idea for this chapter. I hope I satisfied you and all the other readers. 
 

The three of them gather in a circle in the room, laughing and eating until they are all too tired to contribute anything to the conversation anymore. Jongin stays for the night, settling himself in Sehun's bed, cuddling up close to his friend. They doesn't see the look that crosses Luhan's friend when he sees the two under the blankets. Luhan whispers a good night that falls on deaf ears before climbing into his own bed. He pulls the covers over his head and faces away from the duo. 
Jongin and Sehun stay up half the night, talking in hushed voices, catching up on things that they missed while they are apart. Sehun listens Jongin tell stories of all the dances he's learned and how exhilarating it is to dance on a stage and have people cheer for you. He watches as Jongin's eyes light up as he talks about all the different places he's been, the different cities in America. Jongin talks about a boy with wide eyes and plush lips and he blushes and whispers so softly that Sehun almost doesn't hear him. "I really like him, Sehun." Sehun smiles, happy that the boy who's been with him his entire life is living the life he's always wanted and glad that he's along for the ride. 
Sehun carefully avoids the topic of Luhan, not wanting to bring up the sore subject when everything is going okay for a little bit. Sehun tells about his dance classes, describing all the new things he's learned and how he's getting better at his technique and soon enough, he'll be able to join a dance team of his own. Sehun brags about how well he's doing in classes, proving Jongin wrong when he said Sehun would fail because he's too busy with dance. He tells about his showcase at the end of year and how nervous he is but Jongin just reassures him that he will do fine. 
"You'll be there, right?"
"I wouldn't miss it for anything."
Sehun smiles, burying his head in Jongin's chest. Jongin may only be a few months older, but he's been a guide that he's always needed, helping him through all of his mistakes and showing him the proper way to do things. Jongin was the one who helped him with his depression, the one who found him and saved him. 
"When do you have to leave?" 
"Sehun, let's not talk about that. Let's enjoy the time we have together."
"I want to know exactly how much time that is."
Jongin sighs, carding his fingers through Sehun's hair. "My team goes on tour in three weeks, so I have to be back to prepare. I can stay a week and half."
Sehun looks up at Jongin, disappointment in his eyes. "That's not a lot of time."
"I know, Sehunnie. But it's all I could get."
Sehun swallows the lump in his throat, not wanting to ruin the happy atmosphere that they had. They didn't say anything after that, a mutual understanding between them that words weren't needed. 
They've had moments like this before, where one of them would need to be held while the other would hold them, no words being exchanged. Actions were enough. The two of them never stepped over the invisible boundaries. Their relationship wasn't like that. Many people thought that they would do things, things that would pleasure both of them, in secret and go out and act like best friends. They didn't bother denying it because they knew the truth. Hugs and hand holding was as far as they would ever go. If one person crossed the line, it could ruin what they had and they weren't afraid to say anything.
Sehun knew he missed Jongin, but when he was this close to him, he could feel how lost he was without his best friend before. He could feel the words etched in his bones, thoughts that were always there. 
Jongin knew he missed Sehun, but when holding the broken boy, he could feel his heart shattering, guilt overcoming him at leaving him behind to fend for himself. Jongin needed Sehun just as much as Sehun needed him. 
They weren't sure why the seperated in the first place. 
They both thought they could survive. They both thought that they were grown up enough to branch out and experience things on their own, but they were wrong. 
Jongin would never tell Sehun that he was the outcast in his dance team, the other members looking down at him for being so young yet taking the main role for most of their shows. 
Sehun would never tell Jongin that he had been thinking about his past quite often, his plan drifting into his brain quite a lot, distracting him from the things he would be doing during that day. 
Maybe some day they would be together again. Maybe they would be able to see each other every day and depend on each other like they used to. 
But for now, they would keep all of this to themselves, enjoying the closeness of each other, desperately trying to get as much of their best friends as they could. 
"Good night, Jongin."
"Good night, Sehun."
They fell asleep in each other's arms, sleeping into the afternoon, with Sehun missing his classes again. 


                                           
                                                                                                         ~*~*~*~

Luhan pouted into his sandwich, chewing angrily, gaining a few curious stares from people around him. 
"Luhan, that poor sandwich didn't do anything to you. You want to tell me what's bugging you?" Yixing said from across the table, fork digging into his salad.
Placing down his sandwich, Luhan folded his hands on the table staring at Yixing. "Sehun's friend is here."
"Oh?"
"His best friend. His name is Jongin." Luhan said, frown becoming bigger. 
"Luhan, I don't see the big deal here. He's just a friend." 
"He's perfect, Yixing!" Luhan yelled, jumping a little in his seat. "He's perfect and he's Sehun's best friend and they slept in the same bed last night and cuddled and whispered to each other and they look great together."
"Oh, I get what this is about," Yixing said, a smirk on his face. 
Luhan leaned back in his seat and crossed his arms across his chest. "Well, mind telling me what all of this is about?"
"You're jealous."
Luhan's mouth dropped opened, not expecting those words to come out of Yixing's mouth. He opened and closed his mouth several times, trying to find the right thing to say to show Yixing that he was wrong. "I-I do not get jealous! That's...you're wrong."
"Ah, but I'm never wrong! Admit it, Luhan. You've liked this guy since you first met him. Now that someone else is in the picture, you're scared you're going to lose him."
Luhan hung his head, shoulders lowering in defeat because he knew that Yixing was right. As much as he tried to deny it, those feelings would come creeping up and Luhan would stare at Sehun and find himself liking the younger boy. At first he thought it was just affection, that he wanted to take care of the younger boy who had been hurt and left alone at a party. Then time passed and his feelings just grew stronger and he wanted to spend every waking moment with Sehun. Sehun was the first person he liked since high school and it was all new to Luhan again. He wasn't sure how to like someone. He forgot what the feeling was like and it was new territory for him. 
Luhan didn't want to like him. It sounded horrible and he hated himself for trying to get rid of his feelings, but he had been working for something his whole life and Sehun would be a distraction that he wasn't sure he could handle. He told himself he would wait until he was settled and had his life set for him before he would confess. That was the plan he had for himself and he was satisfied with it.
But then Sehun confessed and it all came tumbling down. The hopeful look in Sehun's eyes was almost enough to make him accept, but at the last second he decided he couldn't do it. Luhan was scared of what would happen. If it didn't work out, they would have to live in the same room for another three years. Luhan was scared that he would be the one to get hurt. So he closed himself and rejected Sehun, trying to ignore the look on his face when he said no. 
Everything seemed normal after that and Sehun acted as if nothing happened and Luhan was more than grateful. 
Then Jongin came and told him what had happened to Sehun and he realized how stupid he was to reject the younger boy. He knew Sehun had problems with self-confidence but he never knew to what extent. 
Luhan liked Sehun so it shouldn't have been difficult for him to accept, yet it was. 
"I messed up, Yixing."
"Why?"
"Sehun confessed to me." 
Yixing dropped his fork in surprise, staring up at Luhan with wide eyes. "No way. What did you say? Did you accept?" Luhan shook his head and Yixing stared at him with confusion. "What happened?"
Luhan retold what had happened to Yixing, including everything from the confession to what Jongin had told him. He didn't miss a detail, trying to fill Yixing in as much as possible so he could understand. 
When he was done, Yixing didn't say anything for a long time but Luhan could feel him shooting daggers to the top of Luhan's head. Yixing didn't get angry very often, but when he did, it was scary and he emitted an aura around him. 
Yixing stood up. Luhan looked up at him, waiting for him to do something. Yixing turned around and walked away from Luhan, muttering something about 'stupid people and their dumb love.'
Luhan ran after him and grabbed Yixing by the shoulder. "Wait! What should I do?"
Yixing removed Luhan's hand from his shoulder. "What do you think you should do, Luhan? You don't need me to tell you how stupid you're being. Go fix this. You better hope that he'll take you even after what you did to him." 
Yixing walked away again and this time Luhan didn't follow. Instead he went to go find Sehun. He texted the boy, asking him where he was. Luhan walked around, trying to spot Sehun when he felt his phone vibrate. 
From: Sehun
I'm in our room with Jongin. Why?
Luhan didn't bother responding and shoved his phone into his pocket. He ran towards his shared room, trying not to collide with people. When he reached his dorm room, he burst through the door. 
"Sehun!" 
Sehun and Jongin were sitting on the floor. Jongin was leaning aganst Sehun's bed and Sehun was sitting in between Jongin's legs, head resting against his shoulder. "Luhan, what's wrong?" 
"Can I talk to you?"
"Sure, go ahead."
Luhan's eyes flicker to Jongin before going back to Sehun. "Uh, can we go somewhere else?"
"Why can't we do it in-"
Jongin seems to understand because he's nudging Sehun off of him. "I'll be here when you get back, Sehun. Go with him." 
Sehun listens to his friend and gets up, putting on a jacket.  He goes to the door and Luhan looks back at Jongin mouthing a thank you. Jongin just gives him a look as if to say 'You better not hurt him anymore.'
Luhan nods and follows Sehun, both of them stepping out and closing the door behind them. 


                                                                                          ~*~*~*~


The two walk in silence, Luhan a little bit ahead of Sehun. Sehun doesn't know where Luhan is leading him but he keeps his mouth shut and follows. He doesn't know why Luhan called him out of their room but he seemed really distressed and Jongin told him to go so he obeyed. If Jongin could trust Luhan then Sehun could as well, right? 
It's getting dark out and there are only a few people out walking, returning to their rooms from classes or going to eat dinner somewhere. Luhan turned around every now and then to make sure Sehun was still following him. Luhan hadn't planned out exactly what he was going to say. He didn't want to hurt the younger more than he already has. 
They reached a small garden where people come to be alone and study. There are the only ones there at this time and it's quiet. Sehun walks away from Luhan, going to admire some flowers that have managed to stay blooming despite the weather getting colder. Luhan stares at him and watched a small smile form on his face when he leans in to sniff at the flower. Luhan's heart begins to speed up, the sight of Sehun making him dizzy and happy and confused. Whenever he's with Sehun (which is basically all of the time) he has to hold himself back from hugging or kissing or just staring at the boy all of the time. Sehun with his cute habits and his adorable smile. Sehun who pouts and rubs his arms when it's too cold. Sehun runs his fingers through his hair many times when he's nervous because it calms him down. Sehun who opened up to Luhan even though it must've been hard for him. 
And Luhan ruined his chance with him. 
"I like you." Luhan blurts out.
Time stops and neither of them move. Sehun is still bent over, face close to the flowers. Luhan is holding his breath, waiting for something to happen.  
"What did you say?" Sehun says quietly.
"I like you, Sehun."
Straightening up, Sehun walks over to Luhan. For a moment, Luhan thinks that Sehun is going to kiss him. He's expecting it as Sehun steps closer and closer and the distance between them gets shorter. He closes his eyes slightly, waiting for Sehun's lips to press against his because this is what Sehun wanted as well. They both wanted each other and now nothing was stopping them. 
What he didn't expect was for Sehun to raise his hand and slap Luhan across the face, sending him stumbling back in shock. "S-Sehun?"
"How dare you play with my feelings? How ing dare you." 
"Sehun, no. I'm not!" 
"What changed then? Did you finally realize you liked me? I doubt that's what happened, Luhan." 
Luhan stepped closer, hand still on his cheek. "I did realize! I've liked you for I don't know how long, but I like you, Sehun!" 
"Why now, then?" Sehun said angrily. "Why couldn't you say this when I was pouring out my feelings to you?"
"I-I was scared. I didn't know what would happen and if things would work. But then Jongin came and talked some sense into me and he told me about what happened and I-"
Sehun cut off Luhan. "Wait, what did Jongin tell you?"
"Uh, he told me...about what happened to you. How you tried to...and how he found you." 
"Oh."
"Sehun?"
Sehun stepped back. "I get it now." 
"Get what? Sehun-"
"You're doing all of this because you feel sorry for me, right?" 
Luhan felt his heart stop. "What? No! That's not it at all!" 
"Yes it is! If Jongin hadn't come then we would still be pretended like I didn't confess and you hadn't broken my heart. We would still be going through the same routine, ignorning the subject and going on with our lives." 
Luhan went up to Sehun, placing his hands on his shoulders. "No!" Luhan yelled, startling Sehun. "That's not it! Sehun, I like you. That's it. I. Like. You. I was scared. You are younger than me and what if you decided that I wasn't good enough for you? What if you realize that I'm not worth your time? When you confessed I was so ing happy and I wanted nothing more than to be with you. But you have to understand that I have school and I worked so hard to be where I am and...I didn't want to be distracted." 
"You thought I would be a distraction?"
"I know it sounds awful, but I'm not as talented as you! I can't just go to classes and not practice or study and then pass. I have to focus everyday, reviewing what we went over that day in hopes that I would get a passing score. I don't have time for other things, no matter how much I want to be with you. But I don't care anymore. Because I like you and I want to hold your hand and kiss you whenever I want and I know I messed up. But please forgive me, Sehun. Please." 
Sehun looked straight into Luhan's eyes, trying to find anything that would suggest he was joking. He didn't find anything. Sehun felt his heart swell up at Luhan's words. This is everything that he's wanted. He should accept. He should be asking Luhan to be his boyfriend. 
But he couldn't.
Taking Luhan's hands off his shoulder, Sehun held them between his own. "I'm sorry. I-I can't trust you. At least not now." 
"Sehun-"
"I'm going back to Jongin. Bye, Luhan." 
Sehun walked off. 
Luhan stayed behind and called Yixing. By the time Yixing arrived, Luhan was sobbing into his hands, ignorning the cold around him. Yixing stayed with him until he tired himself out, taking him to his room. 
Luhan fell asleep as soon as his head hit Yixing's pillow. 


                                                                          
                                                                                                                ~*~*~*~


Sehun yelled at Jongin, hitting him with a pillow. He was angry at his best friend for telling Luhan such a personal secret. He was angry at himself for doing what he did. 
Sehun was just angry. 
He needed to take it out on someone and Jongin was the only person around. Jongin took the beating, used to Sehun's breakdowns before. Sehun went at it for an hour, shouting obscenities and insults at Jongin and Luhan and himself. 
When he was done, he cried, screaming about how his life was unfair and Jongin wouldn't understand. 
Jongin didn't understand, but he could pretend to. 
Sehun fell asleep in Jongin's arms again, enjoying the comfort of his best friend. 
Jongin cried with Sehun in his arms, hating the world for breaking such a wonderful boy.