‘It’s December,’ Jongin thought.

The weather slowly becomes chilly. The winds that blowed felt like frozen ices. Jongin could not stand cold weathers. He would fall sick, sneezing here and there, coughing his throat out until it’s sore, and his body felt like it was being dipped somewhere in the antartic ocean. He would not stop shivering. His fingers would be cold as if it was the ice itself.

His body, his physical was in pain.

And his mind, his mental, his inside, his.. heart was also in pain.

His mind rewind at what his hyung said, “I have a date with my girlfriend”

He didn’t know if the ‘girlfriend’ was just a mere excuse of Jongdae running away from the challenge, or was Jongdae, his crush meeting a girl in secret. He really didn’t know. But what pained him the most was the fact Jongdae said ‘girlfriend’. Obviously Jongdae is straight as a pasta stick. But hey, when pasta was put in boiled water, it would bend. Right?

-

Jongin was heartbroken. He didn’t know what to do. He was aware of him being dumb. He was aware of him being so stupid. But he was also aware of his inability to to control his feelings. His crush for a certain hyung. A certain hyung that was oblivious to his feelings. To what he actually felt for the elder. And yet, the elder was taken. Jongdae was taken before he could even gain the courage to say it out loud, to let the elder know. He lost his chance.

One night after practice, he came back to the dorm. That night he decided to stay back again to practice, as what he said to the hyungs. He actually wanted to clear his mind of things. So when he finally cleared that something, he came home. He entered the house only to see Jongdae on the couch, holding his phone talking with someone. Jongin kept walking straight pretending that Jongdae was not there. Apparently Jongdae too, didn’t notice him. Jongin could hear the laugh. He must be happy to have someone to talk to. to whom, Jongin didn’t bother wanting to know anymore. He didn’t care. He cleared his mind.

Or so he thought.

Jongin tossed here and there trying to let the slumber seep in but to no avail. He kept thinking about Jongdae. He was jealous with the phone conversation. He couldn’t stand the laughter that echoed in his mind. The laughter that wasn’t because of him. He felt suffocated and stuffy. He woke up from the bed. Carefully glancing at his roommate, he walked his way out of the room. He wanted to go out and breathe some fresh air. He wore his shoes and went out wrapped with only thin jacket. He would be cold, but he could care less about that.

He felt the breeze slapping his cheeks. He was cold, yet he kept on walking through the streets. He tried to ‘clear’ his mind again. He was thinking of a way to get out from his trapped world of liking.. no, loving Jongdae. He need to get over him.

Jongin found a bench. He sat, he layed, he closed his eyes. Suddenly he felt something a cold icy flakes fell on his cheeks. He opened his eyes to see the snow. It’s snowing..

This time he felt cold. Jongin sneezed once. Jongin sneezed twice. Jongin sneezed thrice. During the fourth, someone hands him a tissue. Jongdae sat beside him and started to scold him for being out at such hour . Mind the freezing cold.

Jongin turned into deaf ear. He was not sure what Jongdae had said. But when he noticed Jongdae getting up from the bench, he moved himself to hug the older. stopping him from getting up. Jongdae, was speechless.

“Hyung, just for tonight. Can you hold me and take care of me? Don’t let me go..” Jongin sobbed into Jongdae’s neck.

“Yes.. Just for tonight, okay?” Jongdae moved his arms to wrap Jongin into warmth.

“yes hyung.. only tonight” Jongin continue to hug Jongdae. Let this be his last night of loving Jongdae. He was going to end it up nicely.

“I love you, hyung” he whispered. And the words disappeared into the cold air. Out of Jongdae’s hearing.

so yeah that's it ^^ Jongdae did said yes. in a painful way T___T i'm sorry if i broke anyone's heart for this. huhu

im sorry for the late update. i finished exam a week ago and yeah. i was lazing around /bricked/

please ignore my grammar, spelling and blah blah mistakes okay? ^^

im sorry ran amna to break your otp like this muahaha but eh this is my story so blehhhh