y i
begin a g a i n 。* will edit later *
My name is Shin Yoonjo .
I am 24 years old this year .
No , actually I will turn 24 this 14 December .
There is nothing much interesting about me . I am just like another typical girl , who loves to shop and tal- that's all .
I am not a clingy person though . Although I think I am just a typical girl , most of my friends acknowledge me as the most prettiest among them .
They always told me to get a boyfriend .
Boyfriend .
I have one . I am still remember him . His face , his laugh , his voice . And right now , I am thinking about him .
About us .
Somehow , I felt regret for not being able to tell him the answer .
He is my first love and I never , ever forget about him . Everyone easily found second love but not me .
I still think that he is a part of me , the owner of my heart .
Heart that turned into a cold one .
That person is you .
I still remember the first time I met you . I wonder if you remember this but it was raining heavily at that time although it was summer . I just finished my dance practice at my school and I could not go anywhere because of the weather so I stayed at school . I wanted to wait for the rain to stop .
The clock struck to 4 in the evening .
The rain started to stop slowly and I quickly made my way to the main exit .
But , I stopped .
I heard your voice from a room and my feet brought me to the music room .
It was good to listen . I did not know who was singing at that time ( I know it is you , now ) but I moved my head closer to the door . You could say that I was eavesdropping at that time . I used to sing and I stopped because the friend that I used to sing with moved to another country and by hearing your voice , it somehow made me want to sing again .
I closed my eyes for three minutes and fifty-four seconds as your voice made its way to my ears and slowly to my heart .
But , all of it stopped when you opened the door surprisingly and I fell right on top of you .
I let out a small gasp . We stayed in that position for fifteen seconds . I wasted five seconds by shutting my eyes tightly and opened them to find you were staring at me .
I don't know if you closed your eyes before but the way you looked at me , made my heart fluttered a bit . I was going to speak but I did not know when you started to lean in
and
my lips met yours .
That is my first kiss . That kiss was gentle and warm instead of the cold weather . Your soft lips fit right into mine and I closed my eyes again , enjoyed the five seconds moment before you pulled out your lips from mine .
I was going to say something but once again , you cut me off .
" I like you "
I quickly stood up and my eyes were looking at you , who just got up from the floor . Something was familiar with you but I cannot figure it out .
At least for that time .
" But , I - "
For the third time , you cut my sentence again .
" No matter what you will say , I will make you to love me . "
I stared at you in disbelief . I did not even know when the raining completely stopped and I heard you were asking me to send me home that evening . .
I nodded my head slightly and you pulled my hand softly and held it firmly as we went out from the school to your .. bicycle ?
I saw you hopped on it and then , you looked at me questioningly with that gaze .
" Come and sit behind me . "
I blinked my eyes slowly at you but I obeyed your words . I made my way to you and sat on the empty space behind you . I tucked a strand of my hair to the back of my left ear . I found out you were looking at me again .
" Hold me closer . I don't want you to fall later . "
Once again , I obeyed you . Is it just me or I found your body stiffen at my sudden touch ? That is one of the questions I have been wondering until now .
During the way , I found myself were hugging you closer and in a blink of eyes , we arrived at my place , my apartment . I quickly took both of my hands from your back . I got down from your bicycle slowly and I began to realize that I never told you my address .
" How do you know I live here ? "
For a very first time , you did not cut off my sentence . You chuckled quietly enough for me to hear it and I gave you a weird expression .
" Do you think my question sounds funny ? Are you a stalker ? "
I widened my eyes when you moved your head closer to mine .
" Tomorrow , Shin Yoonjo "
I felt clueless and before I could say anything , you started to cycle to the main street .
A sigh came out from my mouth as I was walking towards the stairs and I recalled back the moment that I had in the music room just now .
A small laugh came out from my mouth and I quickly covered my mouth .
Back then , I was so innoncent enough about love .
The next day , I did not really think about your words . I thought you were joking when you said , ' tomorrow ' .
I took a bus from the familiar bus stop near the place that I lived to the city .
It took an hour to go there . Sometimes , I would be late for my work because I lived further from my workplace .
But , most of time ... I often woke up late .
Oh , do you know what I work as at that time ?
I worked as a waitress in a restaurant since it was summer break .
" Yoonjo , take a order from fifth table now . "
I was busy helping a new worker that time at the back , washing some plates and glasses . I could not hear if he was calling me that time .
" Shin Yoonjo ! Take a order from the fifth table now . Quickly ! "
I quickly rushed out and gave a small smile to the new worker . The manager quickly threw the notebook and a pen to me .
Luckily , I did not fall or anything that can made me embrassed .
I walked to the fifth table as I was trying to keep my breathing in steady and with a loud and cheerful voice ,
" So , what do you want to order ? " I looked at the customer or I should say twelve good looking customers ?
One of them gave a flirty smile and I bit my lips to refrain myself from punching him right on his face .
" I want to order this for the twelve of us , " a familiar voice made me turned my head to my right side .
What is he doing here ?
" Y-you . What are you doing here ? Are you stalking me ? " I asked you as I looked at you with a sharp gaze .
Again , another tall guy nudged at you lightly .
" Who is her ? "
I heard he asked you quietly but I managed to catch it .
" Soft and sleek jewel . Yoonjo . "
I looked at you annoyingly before I turned my head to the guy who have a pair of big eyes that , oh well , made him looked cute .
" I have so much things to do . I really hope you can cooperate with me , " I said as I put both of my hands on the table hardly .
After that , one by one started to tell their orders until the last turn went to you .
" Just ... a cup of hot chocolate . Thank you . "
I quickly went back to the kitchen and yet ,
I could felt you were watching me from far .
Summer break was over .
I walked early to the school and ended up being one of the earliest students .
" I should never go to school early , " I muttered as I walked along the nearly empty hall with one or two students leaned on their lockers .
The music that played in my mp3 player stopped and I found myself stood infront of the music room .
I smiled to myself and made my way to the class but a hand grabbed my right arm , pulled me inside the room .
" What the .. " I wanted to shout but I surprised to see the person in front of me .
You were giving me the same gaze as you did at our first meeting .
And I lost in your eyes until I've been pull back to reality only to know that
you were kissing me again .
I supposed to push you hardly and curse you for doing that but
I found myself was kissing you back .
From a slow and gentle kiss to a hot and passionate kiss and I wrapped my arms around your neck .
You pulled back your lips from mine and slowly moved them to my left ear .
" Meet me after school today . I will wait for you at the gate . "
I just watched him took his bag and went out from the window.
" Why do you go out by using the window ? "
You grinned at me and slowly that grin turned into a smirk .
" I'm not the student here . I'm from a school full of idiots near to yours . You know that school right ? "
I widened my eyes after hearing you words .
" Byun Baekhyun . "
" Whose name is it ? "
You laughed after that question came out from my mouth .
" It's mine , you idiot . "
And by that , you quickly climbed up the wall and gave a smile to me before you jumped to the road .
Our first date started up with you brought me to your favourite places .
Both of us shared the stories of each other life .
And , I cannot believe we've been best friend for about five months .
But , it all changed that day .
My school graduation day .
You promised me to meet me that day .
You want to celebrate that day with me .
I was busy looking at the door of the auditorioum of my school until someone nudged me , told me that I was being called to the stage .
I slowly made my way to the stairs and I smiled weakly at the principal .
That moment I knew what was it feel to fake a smile .
It hurts .
It feels like the smile eat you up .
And that day was the last day I've ever connected to you physically .
Emotionally ?
Yes ,
I was a fool , a clueless person back then .
I didn't tried to find you .
I didn;t even bother to meet your friends , to ask them about you .
All I did was crying , locking myself in my own home , looking at the bracelet that you gave to me .
" Why are you giving this to me ? "
Your answer made my heart stopped for while .
" So we can connect to each other emotionally . If one day , fate decide to separate me with you , both of us will look at this bracelet and touch it . Remember all the memories that we had together from the very first time I met you at the winter break and the first time you met at the summer break . "
You continued as the wind started to mess up my hair and you , looked at the sky before you lay at the field and gesture me to do the same as you .
" It's funny how we met at different seasons but yet we started to become friend when it was the season of fall . Now , we are back at the winter and I hope for something in the spring later . Our very first spring "
" Yoonjo-ah , do you want to be my girlfriend ? "
I looked at you surprisingly .
My mind and my heart told me to say yes .
" I want to graduate first before startng any relationship . I hope we can become friends for now . "
I thought you will frown and maybe you will walk away from me but you took my hand and held it as I will gone by tomorrow .
" Love is something that we can't force and I know it . "
" You may not be the prettiest girl to others but you are to me . You may not be perfect but you are to me .
You taught me how define love for a very first time in my life .
I want to thank you so much for that , Shin Yoonjo . "
Guilt was all over me as the moment kept replaying on my mind .
I was stupid for not asking you how do you define love through me
I was stupid for not trying hard to search you .
I was stupid for not treating like the way you treated me
And , I was stupid enough not to tell you that
Yes ! I like you and I want to be your girlfriend .
My hope to meet you 5 years ago began to crack slowly like a mirror is waiting to shatter into pieces .
But , that day .
NEW CHAPTER IS UPDATED !
I've been adding some new ideas that I gain from love stories that happen all around me .
This would be Yoonjo's side and later , it would be Baekhyun .
Yeah , I know I am an author who is very slow in updating but I was busy . School and oh well , hanging out with my friends .
Tell me how this chapter is doing to you . -.-" And , I mean that by commenting in a pretty box below .
Oh yeah , I will be on hiatus starting from this week until 14th of October . EXAMS !//
So , bye and have a great time !
farania is signing out !
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