Soobin’s POV

Alexander was currently busy with another project so for now I’ll lias with Jaejoong. He seemed really pleasant and it brought me back to the thought where maybe I could have a shot with him without Hyukjae claiming his rights about me to the whole world.

Even though Kim Jaejoong was a hot shot and practically most fashion lines wanted him to be their model, he had never tried to put on airs. I’ve heard people saying how down to earth he is and how he doesn’t go around flaunting. I’ve seen the reality and I agree, he is indeed a humble man.

“I personally like my jackets to be double ed. “ He said, which snapped me out of my own dream bubble. What am I thinking?

“I think that’s a good choice. I was trying to make up some styles but I guess my ideas are not popping up. I asked him for the classic looks of suits and I’ll try to work from there. Since I wasn’t the expert, I could only do so much.

“Thank you for your time Jaejoong” I said as he had to rush off to his next schedule. This was the only project I was working on and I think I need more inspiration. I have never really done men’s style so I need to do some survey.

The entire afternoon, I spent going around myeongdong and dongdaemun, look at fashion trends and statements, looking out for men’s fashion. By evening time, I was beat. My legs felt like they were dropping and I just need somewhere to sit. Down the corner was my favourite café where I would get inspiration, I got a seat and upon seeing me, the owner got me my usual. I looked out of the window of my usual seat and saw people walking past, minding their own business. Seeing the façade people put up with, no one knows how someone truly feels on the inside.

My thoughts got interrupted by the loud dragging of the chair as I saw someone sitting down on the chair in front of me. This person is none other than Lee Hyukjae.

“What are you doing here?” I was leaning as far back as I can, trying to get far away from him. Even though I know it makes no different, but hey, it’s the effort that counts.

“Soobin, talk to me, please.” He said and I look at him. What is there to talk about? I have nothing to say to him.

“Hyukjae, I have nothing to say to you.”

“Tell me what have I done wrong. I never know what to do around you. You’re different. So different from the girls I know.” He said, sounding the most desperate I’ve heard.

“The problem is not you Hyukjae, it’s me.” I said as I stood up and tried to leave. However, he was as swift as the wind and caught my wrist.

“Soobin, please.”

“I don’t want to cause a scene Hyukjae, people are watching.” And indeed, the whole entire café was watching. Some people are even trying to take out their phones to take a photo of us. Oh that was not good.

“Let’s talk in the car.” Hyukjae said. I wanted to protest but my legs felt like jelly, which left me no choice.

“5 minutes Hyukjae, that’s all I’m giving you.” I said as I walked to the car to see Yunho who gave me a small smile. I guess I was making his job difficult as well.

In the car, the atmosphere was tense. I knew that even though I said 5 minutes, it would be longer than that. Lee Hyukjae gets everything he wants, every time and I was included in it. Yunho started driving and I know exactly where this car would end up.

“Soobin, tell me what’s wrong.” He said, facing me.

“I’m tired Hyukjae, tired of being someone whom I’m not. I’m tired of all the eyes and tired of being criticised by the public. I’m tired of everything Hyukjae. To add on to everything, you are making everything worse. Don’t you see? I’m not your puppet. We’re ending this in three months time and for this three months, you ask me to quit my job? You told me to rely on you and you’ll support me? Hyukjae, don’t you see any reality in this? We are not real. “ my voice was getting louder and louder. I didn’t care if Yunho heard me. I bet he heard me loud and clear. But I cannot hold back anymore. Why did I have to be the one he choice? Why me?

“Then don’t be.” He said softly.

“What?”

“Don’t be tired. Just leave everything to me. I’ll protect you. With all I have, with all I can, I’ll do everything to protect you. Even if it means…. Even if it means I have nothing, I’ll protect you.” He looked straight at me in the eyes when he was saying it. Did he realise what he said? What was that even suppose to mean?

“Hyukjae, You don’t know what you’re saying…” I wasn’t able to continue when he stopped me mid-sentence.

“I know what I’m saying. I know every single word I had just said and I mean it, every single one of it. Trust me Soobin. Do I not deserve that much from you?” He asked. I was speechless. What does he mean by saying all those things? I am so confused. With my head in my brain, trying to figure out this mystery puzzle, Hyukjae pulled me into his arms, someplace that I know many girls want to be but are unable to. I didn’t fight him, but let him hold me. It’s something that I need to calm myself down, something that allows for me to be grounded.

“I’m sorry you have to go through all this. But I promise you I’ll protect you. I’ll do it with everything I have.” He said as he my hair gently. Why do I suddenly feel that we were both going to end up hurt at the end of this contract.

Hyukjae dropped me home. When I alighted, Hyukjae didn’t follow through. He looked at me and I looked at him. He looked like he was going to follow but held himself back. He told me to get some rest and that he’ll see me tomorrow. Some how or another, I wanted him to stay, but to let myself come out of this alive, I’ll just let him go. I waved him goodbye as he left.

When I opened the door into my house, I got ambushed by this strong force coming upon me. I literally fell to the ground and it hurts like hell. When I opened my eyes and sat up, I realised it was Kim Haemin, who else would I have expected to be? I totally forgot she was scheduled to come back today. Hopefully she doesn’t realise that.

“I missed you! How are you? You can’t be fine because I saw everything in the papers. I even set Donghae home so that I can have alone time with you and you can tell me everything. So Spill.” As usual Haemin in her usual journalist-ish tone not like she was going to report me on the papers or magazines but there are things that I can’t tell her.

“No matter how long the story is I’m going to get all of it. So tell me from the beginning.” 

I explained to her how we met (I made something up which I have to tell Hyukjae so that we can match the story) and how we kept it a secret for sometime but during that show he decided to not keep it as a secret anymore and made the move and we went to Bali and came back. Haemin was practically in delight when I was done.

“We can be sisters-in-laws!” Haemin exclaimed. So to think she might be a bit more realistic, I don’t think that’s the case. She went on and on about how we can have the same wedding day and things like that. However the thing she was most insistent in is that we 4, which is me, her, Hyukjae and Donghae need to hang out together sometime as she wants to check if he’s being mean to me. I told her he’s busy but she say that’s an excuse and if he used that on me, she’s going strike points off him.

When Haemin finally let me off the hook, I called Hyukjae.

“Soobin? Is there anything wrong?” He asked. I wanted to like ask him if he think I was some lunatic causing trouble every second but realise I never called him first. He’s normally the one taking all the initiative.

“Haemin is back. I told her a story on how we met and all so I was calling to tell you about the story so we can match it in case Donghae asks you about it.”

“Ok. I’ll tell them whatever you came up with for the story.” Hyukjae said and it was silent. I needed to bring up the next issue. Hyukjae didn’t say anything but I could hear him moving .

“There’s one more thing.”

“You can tell me anything and I’ll do my best to fulfil it.” Hyukjae answered without hesitation.

“Haemin wants to meet you. So he asked that the 4 of us can hang out together sometime.” I said. I was hoping he’ll be busy but at the same time, I don’t want haemin to make his life difficult.

“Anytime. Just tell me the time and I’ll clear the time for it.”

I told Haemin what Hyukjae had said and she was practically grinning from ear to ear, telling me how  Hyukjae would never deny me with what I want and how in love he must be with me to go to such extend. I just smiled a smile that I know is not real at all. It is impossible for Hyukjae to love me.

Haemin who is as impatient as ever said to meet up for dinner tomorrow, the 4 of us. I didn’t know she had wanted to meet him so quickly. If I had known I wouldn’t have told her his answer. But what did I expect from her? She was dying for me to get attached and since I did, she must be dying to make his life miserable on the first meet. I have no idea who would be more miserable, Hyukjae, or me. Furthermore, Hyukjae and I are still at an awkward situation. Would Haemin tell if we were to meet up?

When I relayed the message to him, he immediately cleared out the time for it. He must have more important things to do than to attend a dinner meeting with my friends and I. He said it was nothing much and his associate could handle it. I guess he must really trust his staff to say such a thing.

Haemin got me a dress and she told me to wear it to the dinner tomorrow. It was nice but I bet I wouldn’t be able to breathe in that dress. Furthermore, I don’t think I would want to come all the way back home to change for a simple dinner meeting. So I guess I’ll have to store air in my lungs that can last me for an entire day.

Hyukjae came and picked me up for work the next day. He was leaning against the car when I came out of the house and when he saw me, I could swear his mouth almost touched the ground.

“Is there something wrong? Does the dress not suit me?” I asked since he never showed such an expression before.

“No it’s just that this dress looks good on you. Hell, anything looks good on you.” I couldn’t help but blush. However, deep down inside, I was hoping he wouldn’t say such things so that I could get my head to think straight without using my heart.