Storge: Paper Planes
The Folded Wind
Storge - the Greek term for familial love, pays the least attention to those characteristics deemed "valuable" or worthy of love and, as a result, is able to transcend most discriminating factors
Seohyun loved to spend time with Kris, simply observing the clouds that seemed to not have a care in the world, entertaining him by yelling random things about the figures she saw.
"Look! Doesn't that seem like an avocado?"
Kris furrowed his eyebrows, "It's obviously angry bird."
"You're no fun, see - that one is a chihuahua."
"But it looks like a bat to me."
"How about that big thing right there? It's white and fluffy! Like a sheep," she exclaimed excitedly.
Kris laughed, "Everything kind of looks like a weird sheep."
Seohyun would continue to say bizarre things, just to get Kris to smile.
They admired the sky together, small black birds flying across like dots on a painting.
Her pretty white flats were beside his raggedy old tennis shoes, her delicate sunhat forgotten on the ground nearby. Her perfectly ironed dress was much different from his cotton shorts and old baggy shirt, and the two of them made for an odd sight together; but, she didn't exactly care. He was different from her little stuffy schoolmates that cared more about their hair and expensive toys then actually going to school.
He had real issues, real experiences, real things to discuss with her that were more than just mindless materialistic chatter. He seemed more mature than an eleven year old, colder and more detached than an eleven year old should be.
"Oh! We haven't folded anything yet," she exclaimed, setting her bag down and pulling out a pile of smooth, crisp paper. Taking a pen from her bag, Seohyun hastily wrote on the blank sheets, an earnest letter to her mother before she folded it up neatly. The paper took the shape of an airplane, covered in her messy scrawl along with doodles.
They worked on the planes for some time, filling up the sheets with thoughts and memories that they wanted to share. They forgot about each other for a moment amidst the sound of the wind swooshing gently through the tall grass, brushing fleetingly against their shoulders.
"Hurry up, Kris! I want to fly them together," Seohyun pouted, tapping her foot on the soft ground. Her waist length hair had become tangled; her yellow dress brushing against her knees as she waited on her friend. The midday sun beat down relentlessly on their backs, and she could feel the fabric of her dress begin to dampen.
"Hold on, I gotta finish this last letter - let me borrow that purple pen for a sec, my mom likes that color," he grumbled, fumbling clumsily with the corners of the paper. He brushed his fringe from his eyes and continued to write, pen traveling across the paper in an untamed scribble. The ink spilled across the blank page, staining his palms.
When he stood, he grasped the paper plane firmly in his hand, the gentle wind sweeping around him. They held each others hands and dashed towards the top of the hill, towards the bright blue sky where the delicate clouds floated.
"Mom!" Seohyun screamed at the top of her lungs, forcefully launching her plane into the air, "Mom! I've been well! How about you? Is it nice up there?"
Kris threw his plane with all of his strength, and it caught with the wind, flying far out of his sight. "I hope you get it Mom," he murmured, quickly shoving his hands back into his jean pockets.
"Ready?" she asked, looking over at his gaze that was fixed on the sky.
He nodded in reply, and the two of them ran back down the hill to get another plane. They continued to run up and down the hillside, throwing their planes, filling the sky with their messages.
The two kids fell upon the green carpet of grass with identical sighs, smiles curving upon their small lips. Both were spent from all of their screaming and running, sweaty and tired. Her pale cheeks were painted a bright pink while sweat lazily dripped from his forehead.
This had become sort of a monthly ritual, where they would meet at the foot of the hill in the park to fold paper airplanes. Then they would throw these planes up towards the sky, filled with letters to their mothers, sort of like a monthly update of their activities. The sun beat down harshly on them now since it was June, but back in February - going up and down the hill in the thick snow was such a pain. She had almost lost one of her boots multiple times, if Kris had not managed to find it under the snow.
After laying on the ground for a few moments, Seohyun looked at Kris' arms, seeing that they were beginning to purple in splotches. The bruises scattered, grew closer to his wrists where they began to mingle with the pen stains.
She slowly removed his hands from his pockets, caressing his knuckles. Maybe that would soothe away the pain. The ugly blemishes were always there, and just as the old ones has finally been rubbed away, new ones seemed to be forming.
They no longer really surprised her, the bruises were just a part of him - as much as his burgundy colored hair and prominent cheekbones were.
"Did you ice these yet?" Seohyun asked while carefully inspecting the bruises, lightly brushing them with her fingertips.
"If my mom were here, she would kiss the spots away," he replied, "but she's gone now, so I gotta deal with them alone."
"I'm here for you Kris," Seohyun mumbled gently, her small ten year old hands clasping onto his slightly larger ones.
"You know, I want to kill him sometimes," Kris uttered suddenly, the content smile gone, leaving behind a scowl that knitted his eyebrows.
Seohyun gasped softly, "But that's wrong!"
"He's wronged me."
"Kris, he's your father!"
He almost whispered, "What kind of father beats his child for things that he didn't do?"
She could hear the strain in his voice, the masked anger and indignation of being wronged too many times. It was like a sharp knife, cutting into him and her.
A murderous glint appeared in Kris' deep brown eyes, a darkening that frightened her. It made her think that maybe he would really do it, murder his father. It happened more often after his mother's death, the malicious desire to take his father's life. Seohyun could see it brewing, coming to a bubble beneath his calm exterior. She feared him this way; she would much rather him be screaming and cursing, but instead he was calm - calculating.
"You can't do that Kris."
"Why not?"
"You'll go straight to hell," she said, unblinking, "You're like my brother. I don't want you to go to hell."
A silence followed, the wind rustling their hair as they lay side by side.
"You don't understand me, your father loves you and adores you. You're pampered," he said disdainfully, his voice dripping with poison.
"I do understand loss though."
"What do you mean?"
"My mother loved me; your mother loved you. I lost my mother; you lost your mother. We've both lost someone that we love."
"What does that have to do with anything? My mother is nothing like my father. She actually loves me!"
"You're hiding your hurt behind this anger. You don't want to kill your father."
He sat up then. Eyes questioning her. She stared back, big eyes locking with his. He seemed to be examining her, this little girl who he had known for only a few months. This little girl that could maybe, possibly read his thoughts better than even he could.
"Fine," he conceded.
"Fine what?"
"I won't kill him." His steely gaze was locked on the blue sky; his lips set in a firm frown.
Seohyun smiled, interlacing their fingers as they lay together under the blanket of the sky.
They continued on in a comfortable silence, and she reminisced about the way her mother would brush her hair, straighten her dress, and kiss her goodnight. The wind carried a soft scent, wrapping her in an embrace that was like a ghost of her mother's gentle arms. Suppressed sniffling could be heard beside her. Turning, she was surprised to see tears trickling down Kris' face. He seemed deflated, defeated. Much different from the confident and cold Kris she saw moments earlier, as if he were wearing a facade that had melted away.
"I miss my mom. She said she loved me," he whispered, his voice almost being carried away with the wind.
"It stings. Right here." He jabbed his finger at his chest, repeatedly. "I want her to come back to make me ddukbokgi again, and walk with me to school - and - and," he hiccuped, unable to finish his sentence.
She quickly reached over, hugging him to her chest, feeling him softly pound her back with his fists, sobs muffled by her dress. "Be strong. Your mother wouldn't want you to be like this right?" She his head. "But for now you can cry. It's only you and me here anyway, let it out. Then don't cry anymore. Your mom wouldn't be happy."
They stayed liked that for a while, the wind whispering comforting thoughts into his hair as she rubbed the tears from his face.
"Be strong, Kris. If not for yourself, then at least for your mom. It would hurt her to see you like this."
Be strong.
"Hey - hey," she whispered after a bit, patting his head. Her arms were slung around his shoulder as her embraced her, half lying on her lap.
He looked up, his faces streaked with the path the tears had taken to his chin. "Hm?" His puffy eyes questioned her, empty - sad. They were and hollow for her to see, and for the first time she realized that he also had moments of vulnerability. He seemed cried out, face stretched in a stiff frown. He looked like a wet, miserable mouse that she, the cat, had managed to drag in.
"Doesn't that cloud look like a giraffe?"
"What?" he asked, incredulous at her sudden comment. A moment passed, his eyes wide. She blinked, holding her breath and trying to gauge his reaction. Then his chest started to rumble, and he began to laugh, fists beating the ground - cheeks bursting. "Yes, it does," he managed to say - eyes squeezed shut, arms clutching his stomach.
"Yeah! It looks like you!"
"Like me? What? I'm not a giraffe!"
Seohyun giggled, "But you tower over everyone!"
The two of them laughed then - tears spilling and rolling included, with no one to witness except for the great big sky and the wispy clouds that silently drifted by.
[TFW] The last chapter is finally out - phew, that was tough. Thank you for reading! Until next time :D
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