Can’t eat, can’t drink, can’t sleep…

What are these the symptoms off?

Yoona ponders as she flip flops on her bed again that day. She had been doing that, wasting her time rolling around in the sheets, feeling completely useless to even get up.

It’s just been a week since Yuri had left and even if they text, call and skype everytime they get a chance, it only makes matter worse. It only made Yoona missed Yuri terribly.

“Yoona?”

“Mmmmm…”

“Come down for breakfast…”

Yoona only groans burying herself deeper into her covers…

“Yoona….”

“Alright… alright… I’m coming…”

*

If anyone knows Im Yoona so well, they would be surprise to see how the girl looks so lifeless as she comes downstairs. Usually Yoona would bounce down the stairs so happily at the thought of food, but right now, Yoona looks like she was going down to a funeral.

“What the?”

Yoona looks in surprise as she saw their simple kitchen table laden out with a buffet style breakfast, eggs cook in different ways, bacon, sausage, pancake and waffles. It looks just like that breakfast that she and Yuri had shared a long time ago…

“Did you prepare all this?”

“Heck no…” Hyoyeon looks at Yoona in an are-you-kidding- manner. “Somebody’s girlfriend ordered it for somebody” Hyoyeon starts to look at Yoona mischievously.

Yoona didn’t need to piece out who it is, she excitedly run to the note, grabbing to read it.

“I heard you’re not getting off bed, I’m worried about you, my baby L So, I need you to eat, ok?
PS I miss you terribly too… :,(

And for one day, Yoona ate happily and everything in sight.

Day 13

“Give me a kiss…”

Yoona puckers her lips closer to the screen monitor demanding the older girl to do the same…

“Later, ok?” Yuri hushed embarrassingly.

She’s in the office right now and was sneaking in some one on one time with Yoona. She could just imagine how embarrassing all of this would be if any of her colleagues would walk in and see the enigmatic Kwon Yuri making kissy faces in front of a laptop screen.

“When I get home… I promise…”

“No now!” The younger girlfriend demanded before puckering her lips once again.

Yuri just let out a defeated sigh before sneaking a kiss at her laptop monitor.

The interactive kiss made Yoona go into a fit of giggles, cupping her blushing cheeks as she starts giggling like crazy again.

“Again…” Yoona puckers her lips for another kiss once her giggleness subsides.

The once stoic Kwon Yuri found herself giggling so easily with how adorable her girlfriend is. Forget about the embarrassment, forget about the taunting, her girlfriend was too darn cute and there was nothing she would rather do than kiss her on those red lips right now.

Mwah…

But for now, this kisses will do…

*

Day 25

Yoona flutters her eyes open, smiling happily after dreaming of Yuri. But when she realized that she woke up not having Yuri beside her, the smile quickly disappeared.

She got up groggily, rubbing her eyes to the morning. How fast her smile have returned to her as she sees a Godiva chocolate basket with a note.

I wish you weren’t so God Damn cute so missing you won’t be so painstakingly hard I love you my darling…

Day 49

“WHY NOT?!”

Yoona screams at the monitor, that Yuri could see her tonsils from New York.

“I told you… I’m not going to skype with you until you’re done with finals…”

“I HATE YOU!”

Yoona quickly closes the tab for Yuri, fuming at what had happen. How dare Yuri try to make her study? How dare her? But does Yuri think she couldn’t resist her? Then, she’s dead wrong, she’s going to prove to Yuri that she could do it too…

But then she sees the tab blinking, she ignores it… For once she’s going to show Yuri who’s boss.

It keeps blinking but she’ll remain strong and ignore Yuri.

And it blinks some more…

“UGH! Can you stop bothering me? I’m trying to study you know!”

Yoona pouts cutely at the girl on the other side of monitor for interrupting her “supposed studying time”. But Yuri just looks back at her in her typical icy demeanor.

“Oh you are?”

“Yes… I’ am…”

“Ok… then… good night…”

“Night…”

3…

2…

1…

“No! No Yul… just stay there… we don’t need to talk, just stay there where I could see you. I promise I’ll study…”

“Ok…”

Yuri leans back on her swivel chair, observing the younger girl from across the screen flipping her biology book. Yuri have once again find herself smiling as she sees Yoona looking so serious reading her book.

*

Day 53

Missing you is giving me suicidal thoughts- currently trying to kill myself by eating a giant cheeseburger with large fries and overdose myself with a large soda… If I make it out alive, I’m going to be 20 pounds heavier to be me L Missing you my darling…

*

Day 67

“I got an A”

Yoona grins proudly, dancing the test paper in front of Yuri to see.

“Wow…” Yuri starts clapping as she looks at Yoona’s text paper from the screen.

“You’re amazing…”

Yuri props her cheek on the palm of her hand and just quietly admired the beautiful girl talking happily on the other side of the screen.

It’s like everyday the girl is just growing more and more beautiful.

“What would you like to have?”

‘You.” Yoona answers without even thinking.

“You didn’t even think about it yet…”

“Yes I do…” Yoona nods her head “I think about it everyday and night, all I want is for you to come back.”

“I’m so sorry Yoong, but I couldn’t do that yet…”

Yuri tries to turn away from the screen as her guilt starts to take a toll on her.

“I wish I could come back too…”

Yoona flutters her gaze away from the screen, trying to hide her disappointment.

“Well… you and me both Yul…”

Day 75

“I hate Yuri, unnie…”

Yoona has a deep frown on her face before plopping in front of Yoonhee’s grave.

“I know it might sound awkward to you that I complain about my girlfriend who happen to be your ummm… ex.. but I don’t know who else I could talk too…”

Yoona puffs her cheek frustratingly…

“We haven’t texted or skype in about a week, I well… I text her but she doesn’t reply… I’m worried unnie…”

Yoona stayed quiet for a bit unsure of what else to say. Because truth is, she still feels like she’s betraying her unnie for being with Yuri.

“I’m sorry for bothering you like this… But I mean you’re ok with this, right? With us dating? Probably not… but ummm…”

Yoona scoots closer to the gravestone just so she could feel closer to her unnie.

“We love each other unnie, She tells me that I make her smile, that when she have a bad day all she needs to do is think of me and she’ll be happy. And she makes me so happy too unnie, with her I don’t have to be anybody else, I could be myself and she still loves me.”

That simple, Yoona find herself smiling again…

“I think if ummm… you would have lived and you two would end up together, I would still have fallen for her…”

Yoona found herself lifeless after pouring out everything to Yoonhee. Maybe it was the guilt that was still gnashing at her. But Yuri always tells her that the pain will always be there and but now she doesn’t have to deal with it alone, because she will always be there for her.

“But I would love her from afar, I wouldn’t try and come between you two. And I’ll be contented seeing the two people I love the most to be happy. I’m so sorry unnie, so sorry… but please… I hope when you look at us, you could see how happy we are. And like Yuri said you will always be a part of us…”

She smiled softly at the thought. It was calming to know that she has somebody now to share the pain, to share the hurt.

“Well… goodbye for now unnie…” She carefully brushes off the headstone “I miss you so much…”

Yoona stands up pressing a soft kiss to the headstone before trying to smile. She almost made it to the road when the sight in front of her surprised her.

Although it happened almost two years ago, this scene right in front of her just felt so familiar.

But instead of a broken down bike, there was a brand new one leaning over a tree. She looks around wondering if a raven haired beauty was responsible for this surprise.

“You like it?”

Yoona’s eyes glowed the moment she sees Yuri approaching her. Even if she sees Yuri almost everyday when they skype, still it doesn’t do her justice to when she is standing here right now. Yuri was simply breath taking.

But it wasn’t just Yoona who fell once again, because for Yuri no dream could even match to how beautiful Yoona looks right now…

“You like your new bike?”

Yoona scrunches her brow remembering that she was still angry. So, she shakes her head making sure Yuri knows she’s angry.

Yuri could have just stepped away, give Yoona a chance to cool off but she took her chances. She walks closer to the other girl, wrapping her arms around her baby’s slim waist.

“How come you didn’t text me for a week?” Yoona pouts.

“Because I wanted to surprise you… Are you surprise?”

Yoona copies Yuri’s stoic face, trying to prove to Yuri that she could be cold hearted too. But she gives up when she sees those usual cold dark brown eyes softening up. They almost look like those of puppies.

Yoona quickly nods happily, before wrapping her arms around Yuri’s shoulders.

“I miss you, I miss you, I miss you…”

She loves the bike but she just loves her girl more…

*
Im Yoona…

There was a roar of cheer from a group of girls as their dongsaeng march proudly in front of the stage to receive her diploma. But none of them could be as proud as Yuri who was videoing the entire time her girlfriend walks in the stage.

Kwon Yuri who quickly turned down the offer to head the New York branch for J Fashion Line, for a lot of people they were saying it was such a waste. But as Yuri watches the girl wave proudly at her from the stage, all she could say is, these people didn’t know what they were missing.

“Awww… she finally graduated…”

Sooyoung pats Yuri in the back.

“Now it wouldn’t look so illegal dating her…”

The smile in Yuri’s face turns into a deep scowl as her friends starts chuckling at her expense.

“Shut up…”

“YURIIIII!!!!”

Yoona jumps excitedly on her lover’s arms making her girlfriend all flustered. It didn’t help that all their friends are giving her these teasing looks. It’s not everyday they could see the frowny Kwon Yuri blushing like this.

“Awwwww…”

“Oh hush…” Yuri mutters under her breath before she smiles at the young girl. “Congratulations…”

“AWWWWWW….”

Yuri was about to spat back, but when she sees how amused Yoona is. She takes a deep breath and counted from 1,2,3 before smiling again…

“I’m so proud of you…”

*
The two girls felt like they were drawn back to their childhood as they spend the entire evening, just laughing and talking about the most random things. They weren’t even aware that it was almost three am, until Yoona unconsciously let out a yawn…

“You’re sleepy…”

“No… I’m not…”

But Yoona was, it was almost three am and it was way pass her bedtime.

“It’s ok…” Yuri nestled her head on Yoona’s neck. “I’m just right here, when you wake up.”

“But I don’t want to sleep yet…” Yoona pouts.

“Our line is going to have a launching party tomorrow night… I can’t take a date who got panda eyes.” Yuri jokingly pokes Yoona on the waist, much to the dismay of the other girl.

“Panda eyes? Hmmmp..” Yoona slaps Yuri’s hand away and turns to the other side.

“Good night then” Yoona says curtly.

Yuri moves closer to the younger girl, wrapping her arm around her waist.

“Good night…”

But not a few seconds pass by and Yoona, the rambunctious girl that she is, stirred Yuri awake.

“Yul?”

“Hmmmm?”

Yoona turns around to face her girlfriend, Yuri has her eyes close, trying to get some sleep.

“Ummm… nothing… good night…”

“Yoong?”

“Yes Yul?”

Yuri finally opens her eyes, getting up so she could slowly crawl on top of Yoona.

“Move in with me…”

A thousand thoughts flood inside Yoona’s head at Yuri’s request. Move in? Together? In one bed every night? Things might happen…

“We don’t have to do anything if you’re not ready…”

Yuri quickly reassures her as if she knew what was going on Yoona’s head.

“I don’t want to be selfish but Yoong… my Yoong…”

Yuri leans close to plant a sweet kiss on Yoona’s lips.

“I would want to give you nothing but the best, and you’re worth the wait… So, when that night comes… It’s going to be special for both of us. But right now, I think about you too much and I don’t think I could get any closer… Yoong, I would like you to be the first person I see when I wake up, and the last one before I go to sleep.”

Yuri smiles before she kisses Yoona tenderly.

“Me too…”

“Then, it’s a yes?”

“You’re going to help me pack?”

Yuri nods happily, before Yoona smiles back, pulling the girl closer as they linger the night away in their kisses.

*

“YURI! I’m going to sleep!”

The Rilakkuma pajama clad girl yelled out to the girl in the bathroom…

“Ok…” Yuri yelled back before spatting out her toothpaste…

“GOOD NIGHT!”

It was Yoona’s way of telling Yuri, to hurry up and come to bed with her.

“NIGHT!”

Yoona frowns, annoyed how her girlfriend couldn’t hurry up. It was their first night together and Yoona expected Yuri to be in bed with her at the same time.

So, Yoona hop out of bed, running to the bathroom…

And the moment she sees Yuri, she wished she havent…

She swallows this huge lump in as she eyes every single detail of Yuri’s exposed skin. The girl was barely covered with her boxer shorts and spaghetti strap shirt.

Oh God… and I’m wearing a Rillakkuma pajama.

Yoona quickly did an about face…

“I’m going to sleep… night…”

Yuri couldn’t help but smirk slyly, she knew that kind of look that Yoona gave her. She was so used to it but still she couldn’t help but relish it.

“Good night…” Yuri says in a sensual husky voice.

Yuri’s smile got wider as she felt Yoona stiffen when she wrap her arms around her.

“What’s wrong?”

“Ummm… ahhh nothing…”

“You know you could look all you want, Yoona… you know everything is yours…”

Yoona turns at Yuri surprisingly.

“Everything is mine? what is?”

Yuri raised her brow teasingly at Yuri.

“Every little piece of me…”

“YAH!!!!” Yoona blushed happily “YOU BYUN!!!!”

*




Yoona bows politely as she steps into the elegant glass panel doors of Yuri’s office. She walks carefully inside the office, feeling like a lamb inside the den of lions.

She was worried about her girlfriend, eversince Yuri was promoted as the head in their office in Seoul, the girl wouldn’t have time to eat or sleep, she would be so tired and just get 3 hours of sleep before returning to work again.

So today, Yoona woke up extra early so she could prepare lunch and bring it to the other girl. But stepping inside the office made her see another side of Yuri, she wasn’t her darling Yuri, but the respected and feared CEO for J fashion.

The place is filled with people decked with designer wears from head to toe. Now she was having regret bringing Yuri some lunch…

“I should have just save this for dinner…” She mutters in regret as she stares at the lunch she carefully prepared for her lover.

“Ms. Im?”

The cutesy secretary peeked from behind her computer to look at Yoona.

“Ms. Kwon is ready to see you now…”

“Oh ok… thank you…”

When Yoona thought that the room was intimidating, it didn’t match how overwhelmed she was when she stepped inside Yuri’s office. She didn’t know how important Yuri is to this company until she sees how vast Yuri’s office is.

“Yoong?”

Yuri steps away from her computer, walking towards the girl to press a kiss on Yoona’s cheek… Yoona was going to reciprocate the kiss but Yuri purposely turn so they could kiss on the lips instead of the cheeks.

Yoona giggles before plopping happily in her girlfriend’s lap.

“I brought you lunch…”

Yuri’s office starts to get filled with the aromatic smell of Yoona’s homecook meal.

“Thank you…” Yuri kisses Yoona on the lips again.

“Anything for you… Are you on break?”

“Well… no… but now that you’re here, I think this is the perfect time to show you.”

Yoona turns to Yuri surprisingly

“What?”

Yuri pulls Yoona off her and takes her hand.
“I’ll show you…”

*

Yuri covers Yoona’s eyes as she leads her to another room…

“More surprises?” Yoona teases her

“Everyday will be a surprise for us…” Yuri teased back.

And just when Yoona thought she was ready for anything Yuri had in store for her, she was wrong.

She was breathless to see the entire ceiling lit up with diamond snowflakes cascading gracefully from the sky, perfect to accentuate the different elegant designs of wedding gowns displayed right in front of her.

“You? You designed all this?” Yoona asks in awe.

“Yes, all with you in mind…” Yuri confesses sheepishly…

Yoona starts to walk around, grazing her hand at the different gowns laid in front of her.”

“Ummm…”

Yoona turns around and sees Yuri, her once so cocky Yuri, blushing madly a few feet away from her.

“They wanted to launch a line for wedding gowns and dresses. And they ask me to lead it. I thought it would be hard for me to imagine those things but then…I…” Yuri smiles softly at her inspiration

“And soon I have all these dresses designed, but then I saw these models in the catwalk, it didn’t… it didn’t feel right for me…”

Yuri bites her lip to stop herself from quivering so much, she takes Yoona’s hand in hers, leaning their foreheads together as she confessed.

“And then I thought of you, of that one person who inspired everything in me. and I said to myself, the only time I will be happy to see this design is when I see my wife walking down the aisle towards me…”

Right this very instant it wasn’t just Yuri who was trembling, Yoona couldn’t stop herself from crying as Yuri pulls out a blue velvet box from her pocket.

“I imagine it to be you, Yoona, to be the girl who’s going to walk down the aisle to me. You have taught me so much on how to love, there is never a day that I don’t feel blessed to have someone like you love me, And right now and until forever, there is nothing more I could wish for than to show you how much I love you everyday for the rest of our lives.”

Yuri tries to still her shaky hand as she nervously opens the blue velvet box revealing the platinum engagement ring with the diamond shaped like a snowflake.

“Im Yoona, my Yoong, will you be my wife?”

Yoona was too happy that she couldn’t even say a word, nodding excitedly as she sees the engagement ring. Yuri took the ring carefully out of the box before slipping it in Yoona’s finger.

“Diamond snow?”

“You know the myth they say about the diamond snow, that if you watch it with somebody, the two of you would fall in love. Im Yoona, I want you to know that no matter what weather, no matter what season, everyday I just fall deeply for you.”

“Yul!”

Yoona wraps Yuri in an embrace, the two were lock in an embrace, before their lips met to say yes to their promise.

Yuri have wanted to ask Yoona if she says yes, but from the kiss she received from the girl, it was obvious.

*

Yuri took the hand of her young bride as she led her to Yoonhee’s resting place.

“I’m ok now, Yul…” says the beautiful young bride “Now step away because I need to tell unnie something…”

Yuri takes a couple of steps back, but not too far that she could hear everything…

“No… you’re still too close… more…” Yoona wave Yuri away and Yuri waddles backwards
“More…”

Yuri refuses to take more steps because in all honesty she wanted to hear what Yoona wants to tell Yoonhee on their wedding day.

But Yoona didn’t want Yuri to hear, she grumbles loudly at the hard headed girl and pushes Yuri away herself to the tree.

“There.” She reprimands Yuri “And stay there…”

Yoona went back to the grave, casting warning glares at Yuri if she dare moved.

“Hello unnie…”

Yoona turns back just to make sure and Yuri the obedient girlfriend and now wife that she is, is standing away from them.

“I’m married now… Me and Yuri got married… You should have seen Yuri, unnie… she looks so beautiful”

Yoona covers her blushing cheeks at the thought of her wife

“I can’t believe I’m married to someone so beautiful. This is a new stage for us and I’m nervous and so excited at the same time… Tonight is our wedding night… I’m so nervous, me and Yuri are finally going to…”

Yoona covers her face which now turned from pink to a deep red.

“Oh my gosh… wherever you are unnie, please turned away when me and Yuri are ummm… you know…”

She chuckles nervously, brushing away a tear that escape from her cheek.

“I miss you so much, but I know that you were here with us to celebrate the happiest day of our lives. I love you unnie…”

Yoona lays a gentle kiss on the gravestone.

“I promise I will take care of her.”

Before more tears flow out, Yoona felt someone brushing her tears away.

“How long were you standing there?”

Yoona asks surprisingly, wishing Yuri haven’t overheard about it.

“Just right now… just enough to hear you tell Yoonhee how excited you are about tonight and you can’t wait to devour me.” Yuri smiles slyly as Yoona’s jaw drop in embarrassment.

“YAH! SO BYUN!”

Yoona slaps Yuri in the arm, before the two end up chuckling again.

The two suddenly found themselves in silence…

The nagging pain was still there, but Yuri chose to live with the pain than to go on and forget about Yoonhee.

Yoonhee will forever stay in her heart. As the girl who taught her about forgiveness, about sacrifice and about love.

“Is there something you wish to say to unnie?”

Yuri didn’t look at the grave, but instead she looks up for she knows that’s where Yoonhee is, her angel, her star watching her from above.

Yuri takes a deep breath before smiling…

“Yoonhee, I… I met her Yoonhee, at the most unexpected place, the girl who I thought I could never deal with, became the girl that I couldn’t live without. I found her Yoonhee, the girl that I could fall in love with for the rest of my life.”

Yuri turns to the girl smiling proudly beside her, Yuri returns her smile kissing her in the forehead before taking her hand.

“Yoonhee, I wish I could tell you how happy I’am to have her. But words won’t do it justice, but I wish wherever you are, you will be proud of us, of how we become, of how we found the ones were going to spend the rest of our lives with.

Yuri smiles again, a mix of happiness and sadness, as she closes a chapter, to usher a brand new start for her.

“Yoona have become my everything…”

The two shared a sweet smile.

“Yoona have become my wife.”

*

How do you even begun nights like this? Do you rip each other’s clothes off? Do you sensually take off your clothes? How? How? Yoona wonders… How?

“Yul?”

“Hmmm?”

The two have been gazing at each other for quite some time now, until Yoona broke the silence.

“Are you cold? Because your ears are red”

And if Yoona would know that it wasn’t the temperature that was making her wife’s ears red… Yoona reaches out to her wife’s ear, rubbing it between her fingers. And it only made matters worse for Yuri, as she got more red.

“Keke…” Yoona laughs amusingly “You’re like Rudolph but instead of your nose, your ears turns red.”

Yuri laughs nervously before nuzzling their noses together. This was it, another step they have to take, something they both wanted but now that it’s here, their nerves were getting the best of them.

Yuri the girl’s hair so lovingly, gazing at the beautiful girl beneath her. How lucky could she be to have someone like her?

Yoona nods slowly, urging Yuri that she has been waiting for this.

Their kiss was simply magical, as if the two of them were brought to a different world. Their fingers were now moving on its own accord, gently grazing every inch of each other’s skin. As feathery as their touches were, it was enough to leave tingly sensations in their lover.

And just when they thought they knew the meaning of love, they realize they were hopeless. For tonight, they didn’t realize how capable they are to love until they became one.

*

After a few months…

Yuri has been such an expert in multi tasking these days. It was to be expected being the CEO of one of the most renowned fashion line in the country. She became a master of handling time, squeezing every little thing in one tiny moment.

This morning was no different as she had her phone cradled under her neck, while she takes a bite of her toast and stuffing things inside her purse.

“Your day is booked…”

Her secretary from the other line on the phone began enumerating everything that Yuri had to do for that day.

Yuri was in a hurry that morning, but when she gazed at the beautiful girl tending to their garden. Everything in her went still.

She let those minutes slip by, chuckling softly as she watches the girl happily throwing around dirt.

Her young wife, Yoona might be years younger than her but Yuri thinks she should learn a thing or two about being a good wife from her. Yoona have always been supportive in the good or the bad, never sleeping until Yuri is home, and making sure she takes care of Yuri’s needs.

Yuri was thankful for that, but right now it’s her turn to be the good wife.

“Hyuna?”

“Yes… Ms. Kwon?”

“Cancel all my appointments for today…”

There was a pause in the other line as Yuri’s secretary wasn’t quite sure of what she heard.

“Ummm maam?”

Yuri left everything in the kitchen counter, smiling as she was about to join the younger girl.

“I have much more important things to do.”

*

Yoona almost jump away in surprise as she sees somebody handing her Sunscreen lotion.

“You need to put some before you go out in the sun like this.”

Yoona smiles, nobody could figure it out, but she knew perfectly that this was how her Yuri shows her love.

“Ok… so I won’t be as dark as you… kekekekeke…”

Yoona chuckles triumphantly as Yuri’s face scrunches into a deep scowl. Yuri was never fond of complexion jokes, but because she loves Yoona too much, she let it slide.

But that doesn’t mean she won’t get her revenge.

“WHY YOU?!” Yuri starts her attack as she squeezes the hose trigger, soaking the younger girl.

“ACK YUL!!!”

Yoona tries to cover herself as Yuri starts hosing her down and this time it was Yuri who starts to laugh triumphantly.

Their morning was spend splashing, laughing, bickering and throwing stuff at each other. After being covered by mud, they both raised their hands in surrender, and made a peace treaty by showering together. No gardening was done, instead their garden looks worse than it was to begin with.

For most it was a waste of time, but for the two it was the best time of their lives.

If this was the old Yuri, she would have left for work, and returned home late to see her wife sleeping in the couch as she waits for her to come home. But this was the new Yuri.

This new Yuri, who was blessed to know the meaning of happiness.

Her happiness wasn’t about the fame, or her stature or the money, but instead it was finding that happiness with somebody.

Happiness could never be measured, but for Yuri it was everywhere.

It was in Yoona’s smile as she wakes up every morning,

It was in the sound of her loud laugh as they joke about the most stupid things.

It was in the taste of her kiss that until now she could never get enough of.

And if anybody would asks Yuri now what happiness means, she would only say one thing.

Happiness is being with Yoona.

 

And because of you, I'm happier than anybody else

-U, 4men

END

_________________________________________________________________________________________

It's finished. :)

Thank you for reading

Please leave a comment, I want to know if you enjoy this story as much as I do or not. hehehe...

Once again, thank you!