(A little M for the language.)

Five

"Please don't stand so close to me,
I'm having trouble breathing..."
-Distance, Christina Perri

Mr. Kwon wasn’t picking up his phone the following day so I was forced to go to his house. As usual, his door wasn’t locked so I took the liberty of going in.

“Mr. Kwon?” I called.

No answer.

“Mr. Kwon?”

Instead, Jolie welcomed me, her tail wagging excitedly while barking and jumping on my leg. It was an unacceptable behavior so no matter how much I wanted to return her greeting by petting her, I couldn’t. As what Cesar Millan had imparted on his show numerous times, you don’t give affection to the wrong state of mind because you are nurturing it. Jolie was obviously in a wrong state of mind, being overly excited, so I handled her with what I thought was the best treatment for her—ignoring her.

I went to look for Mr. Kwon instead, who was either gone or still asleep. But his car was outside so he couldn’t have left.

He’s still asleep then, I concluded. The whole house was silent anyway.

While the lesser than excited Jolie stalked behind me, I looked for what supposedly Mr. Kwon’s bedroom was. Houses like this have a generic number of bedrooms—two—so it won’t be difficult to find. My search was cut short when in one room suddenly came out a tall, svelte woman in a body-hugging purple dress, carrying in her fingers a pair of shiny black stilettos. It was safe to say that with her tousled, wavy hair and messed-up eyeliner and lipstick, she and Mr. Kwon had shagged the night.

I should not be startled by this newly found information. But I still was.

She noted my presence but chose to count the bills on her hand instead, before folding it all together and tucking it presumably inside her bra. Disappointment crossed her face as she put on her shoes and strutted. Then she stopped beside me and told me, “hey, tell your boss there’s extra payment for his .”

My eyes blinked rapidly for a couple of times, before they went and stayed wide in astonishment. There was no way I could un-hear that. No way.

“I’m going back to collect tonight,” she added before continuing to sashay towards the front door.

I brushed the revolting thought out of my head and marched to Mr. Kwon’s bedroom. He was still asleep, lying with his face down. He probably must be , too, but thank heavens for the blanket that covered him down from the waist.

I jabbed him on his exposed arm. “Hey, get up…”

He didn’t stir but he replied in a slur, a hint of irritation noted in his voice. “The payment is at the top of the drawer, Angel.”

Angel? That was the hooker’s name? Oh, the irony!

“I’m not Angel,” I said. “Speaking of her though, she told me there’s extra payment for,” there’s no better way to filter the words, “ your .”

Ah, I hope Grandma won’t rise from the grave and give me a spank on the for saying the D-word.

While I was tormenting myself silently, Mr. Kwon guffawed humorously, sitting up and resting his back on the headboard. Well, that woke him up, didn’t it?

“Can you say that again? ?”

I narrowed my eyes at him in contempt.

“Come on, you can just treat it as a name,” he goaded mischievously. “. Tracy. Van Dyke. Andy .”

Ignoring his naughty entreaty, I went ahead with what I came there for. I dispensed to him a blue folder that contained a bunch of papers. “It’s a contract.” As soon as he took it from me, I searched for a pen on my bag. “You can read everything but that’s unnecessary. I mean there’s nothing deceptive or suspicious about the terms. Do you have a pen somewhere in here? I can’t seem to find mine.”

He frowned at the contract, not answering my question. Moreover, he tossed it aside, going back to lying on his bed.

I took the initiative of looking for a pen in one of his drawers as I went on. “I have to have it notarized so I would appreciate it if you’d sign immediately. There’s still a lot of things I have to accomplish today, and if I could strike this contract one out--”

Then I halted from speaking. A piece of paper lying on one of his drawers had apparently grabbed my attention. I read it. Thereafter I turned to him, a bit outraged from what I discovered. “What is this?”

“Why don’t you tell me seeing that I don’t know what you’re talking about?” he replied from the pillow his face was buried into.

I kept the letter in my grip, walking closer to him. “You’re mandated to attend a series of AA meetings which started two weeks ago. This,” I lifted the paper up, “is reminding you that you should or else your license, which had already been revoked for DUI, will be revoked again. For one year! So all this time, you’ve been driving without a license?”

He sat up on his bed again, looking every bit bored with our discussion. “Well, let them keep that ing card for a year. It’s not like I couldn’t take the bus or cab.”

I clenched my jaw. “That’s not the point, Mr. Kwon. You did something wrong, you get disciplinary action for it, you should submit to it. It’s how the law works.”

Mr. Kwon smiled caustically. “Right. Looks like we got a noble citizen here. Good for you. Now, do you have that pen so I could sign the goddamn contract, and then leave so I could go back to my sleep? Angel drained all my energy last night you have no idea of the things we did…”

I gulped the ball of discomfort that swiftly formed in my throat. The last thing I wanted to hear this morning was positions.

But I held my ground.

“No,” I said firmly. I even sat on the edge of his bed. “I’m not leaving until you actually get up, get dressed and go to that AA meeting,” I peered at the letter again, “which is scheduled in 30 minutes. And if I have to drive you just to make sure you’d be there, I would.”

“You do realize that you’re in a bedroom alone. With a man.” He his lips seductively. Though I was very well aware he’s only doing that to play and rile me at the same time.

I nearly gasped in horror. But I was scared all the same so I rose to my feet at once.

Mr. Kwon snickered. “I thought so,” he said and went back to lying, covering his entire self under his blanket.

I gritted my teeth. “Fine, you want to go this route? I’ll go with you.”

I trudged out of his room and went to the kitchen. With a metal pan and butter knife in my hands, I went back, staying by the closed door. Jolie was watching me from a few feet away, seemingly bemused as she tilted her crinkly face to the side. I warned her, “I’m sorry Jolie, but this will be a little too noisy for you.”

I started whacking the base of the pan with a butter knife. It produced no less than shrill vibrations that annoyed me to the bones. But I didn’t care. If Mr. Kwon didn’t want to get up, then I won’t let him fall back to sleep either.

I hit and I hit and at last, Mr. Kwon opened the door, utter displeasure smearing all over his face. “The are you doing?!”

There was a concentrated determination to punch me dwelling in his eyes and that kind of frightened me. Well, at least in all this, he had the decency to cover his weenie with a blanket.

Weenie! That’s the word I was looking for earlier! I had to say ‘’ and Mr. Kwon had to annoy me with it!

“Good, you’re up,” I said with a huge grin. “I’ll be in my car, waiting. And please be quick. You have less than 25 minutes now to make it to your session.”

---

Seated behind the steering wheel, I watched Mr. Kwon slowly drag his feet from his house to my car and then hid his face under his red trucker cap after making it to the passenger seat.

I drove in silence, though I had this urge to tell him how proud I was of him for being a big man and proceeding to the AA meeting. But then surely, he’ll take it sarcastically and spew out some sarcastic remark that would irritate me so I kept mum.

As an alternative, I hummed to Party in the USA. I suddenly remembered it from seeing Pitch Perfect a few days ago in DVD.

“I put my hands up, they’re playing my song, and the butterflies fly away,” I tapped my fingers rhythmically onto the steering wheel, “I’m noddin’ my head like yeah, movin’ my hips like yeah.”

Then I threw a look at Mr. Kwon, dispatching the song to him.

He only stared at me impassively.

Spoilsport.

I dispatched the song back to myself, bobbing my head up and down and side to side to the imaginary beat. “I got my hands up, they’re playin’ my song. I know I’m gonna be okay. Yeah-i-yeah, i-yeah-eh-eh, it’s a party in the USA! Yeah-i-yeah, i-yeah-eh-eh, it’s a party in the USA!”

I heard Mr. Kwon emitted a sound. It wasn’t lucid but I could perfectly discern it was an expression of displeasure.

“Oh, come on!” I prodded. “You know you want to sing along.”

“That’s the most horrible version I’ve ever had the misfortune of listening to. No one will sing along to that.”

It wasn’t the first time my singing skills have been slandered. And it wasn’t that awful of an insult either. I mean I’ve heard the worst, like “Whitney Houston will rise from the grave to wring your neck if you ever sing I Will Always Love You again,” or “You won’t believe this but Christina Aguilera called me to tell you to stop singing Beautiful because none of what you just did was.”

But to all of those, I didn’t care. It’s not like I wasn’t aware that I truly at singing. I just love it like that. It’s unfortunate though that with all those times I spent singing inside the bathroom with a shampoo bottle as my microphone, my voice never improved. I must have been born with crappy vocals that no amount of practicing could ever fix.

Instead of shooting a retort, I just giggled, earning me an odd look from Mr. Kwon.

“Why are you so grumpy?” I said good-naturedly.

“Why are you so annoying?” he fired back.

Oh, so we’re playing this game, huh?

Me: “Why are you such a killjoy?”
Mr. Kwon: “Why are you such a pest?”
Me: “Why isn’t your name Grinch?”
Mr. Kwon: “Why isn’t your name Jabba The Hut?”
Me: “Why do you look like a bulldog?”
Mr. Kwon: “Why do you look like a mole rat?”

I actually laughed at that. That thing is hideous. All the ogres from Lord of the Rings have nothing on the mole rat.

Mr. Kwon laughed as well, but as soon as he caught himself, he brought his mirth to an end. I was about to , but we’ve already arrived at the designated venue for his AA meeting and so our attention was shifted to it.

It somewhat felt like dropping off a freshman to high school on the first day, as I pulled up at the front of the building and waited for Mr. Kwon to get out of the car. He undeniably looked like he didn’t want to. But after an impatient honk from the vehicle behind me, he finally did, going straight inside the establishment.

Wait, no goodbyes?

“Call me if you need a ride back home,” I shouted at his retreating back. But like what he normally does, he ignored me.

---

For the time Mr. Kwon had his AA session, I busied myself with having his contract notarized. In the course, I was able find four strays—a yellow Labrador, and three Rottweiler puppies who were abandoned in an alley by a garbage pile. I brought them all to Roof-A-Dog headquarters, and while Minjee took care of the puppies, Haekyun attended to the Labrador, right away. Speaking of the two, they seemed to be at a truce, unless Haekyun spurts out a joke to Minjee and the latter will squint her eyes indignantly at the former.

Well, as long as they’re not physically harming each other, I wasn’t going to get in the way between the two.

Anyhow, I also called the dog food supplier, placed my order and was delighted to know that they’re going to deliver my purchase within the day. I was able to spend some time as well with the Lab-Chow mix (who I temporarily named ‘Honey’) after Minjee told me it had developed some sort of fear with the rubber gloves.

I felt like I’ve accomplished so many things today I realized how tired I have been. Needless to say, somewhere along going over the changes I wanted for Roof-A-Dog’s website, I had fallen asleep. And if not for the incessant ring of my phone a couple of hours later, I probably wouldn’t have woken up until the evening.

“Hello,” I mumbled without taking the time to look at the caller, my heavy eyelids working their way to unfurl.

“Where the hell are you?!” the familiar voice snarled. “I’ve been calling you for the last ten minutes!”

I stirred from the table I used as my pillow. “Mr. Kwon? Oh gosh, I’m so sorry!” I scrambled for my bag, slung it over my shoulder and marched to the door. “I’ll be there as soon as possible.”

“Yeah, you have to. Immediately. Some bastard yelled my name. It caused a commotion so now I’m in a ing toilet, hiding inside a filthy, stinking cubicle.”

“Okay. I—”

“Stop talking and get your ing out here right away!”

I made it half-way to my car but I stopped at my tracks. “Say please,” I demanded.

“Say what?” Mr. Kwon definitely sounded appalled.

“I don’t appreciate you bossing me around. I’m a patient person but I can only take so much. I’m not going over there to fetch you unless you say please.”

He grunted outrageously. “Like that would ever happen!”

“Say please, Mr. Kwon.”

“No.”

My jaw clenched. “Fine! Then take the bus. Or the cab. You said so smugly yourself earlier you could take either, didn’t you? So go do it.”

And then I hung up.  

---

I turned in to bed early that night but I couldn’t sleep. Somehow, I was feeling guilty for leaving Mr. Kwon at his AA meeting and have him ride a PUV.

I was also curious to know if he was able to make it to his home safely. But then with all the wrath I felt for him for being so cruel and grouchy and uncouth, I held my fingers taut to my blanket, keeping it from picking up my phone to call him.

He’s a grown man, I convinced myself sternly. He can take care of himself.

Still, it wasn’t going to change the fact that I couldn’t sleep.

So at 9:30 in the evening, I found myself driving to Roof-A-Dog headquarters. I decided to patch up the destroyed fence myself given that Mr. Kwon will not do it. If I remember correctly, there’s still extra chopped wood and white paint left I stashed in the small tool shed at the backyard.

I know I could just wait for Mr. Kwon to fix the fence himself, but what if he’s steadfast about not doing it? I really hate to tell someone twice about something. And really, that’s what I’d been carrying out with him, it’s not funny anymore. Besides, with what happened this afternoon, there’s no way he would actually accomplish what I demanded for him to do.

A few meters away from the headquarters though, I noticed someone. Clad in black sweats, the figure knelt by the fence. From my position, it was difficult to distinguish who the person was, let alone determine if it was a man or a woman given that the sweatshirt’s hood was draped over his/her head.

Saving my mistrust for later, I exited my car the moment I pulled over to the side. But just to be safe, I kept the light on and stayed at least seven feet away. I knew the person noticed my presence because although he/she look at me, for a second he/she stopped coating the fence with white paint. The fence, which as I closely noticed it now was nearly finished being restored. Except for that one lone bar being worked on, it almost appeared like it wasn’t ran over this morning.

“Who are you?” I asked.

At last he turned his head to me, staying silent, before going back to what he was doing.

I was bewildered to find that it was Mr. Kwon. Didn’t I just establish minutes ago that he’s nowhere near repairng my fence? I mean that’s why I came here for.

I crossed my arms on my chest. I suddenly wanted to sputter something ruthless to him. But why? Because I couldn’t believe he’s really here, in flesh, mending my broken fence?

“How did you get here?” I asked instead, but even that question needed not to be answered when my eyes cruised to the other vehicle parked on the curb aside from mine.

“There,” he said, gesturing to my fence, completely ignoring my question. “It’s finally fixed.”

I wasn’t aware if I should be sincerely grateful. All I knew was that I was still in awe to believe this was happening. I mean who even knew G-dragon could do manual labor? “Uhm…thank you…?”

Mr. Kwon didn’t respond. He proceeded to gathering his tools and storing them at the trunk of his car.

“Are you going home?” I asked.

“No, because this,” he looked around to indicate ‘this’, “seems like a very comfortable place to spend the rest of the night.”

I rolled my eyes. That’s not what I meant. “Let me drive you, Mr. Kwon. You know you can’t without a license.”

“I just did, didn’t I?” He shut the trunk lid of his car before facing me, hands deposited at the front pouch of his sweatshirt. “What are you doing here?”

“I was supposed to fix the fence, but…you beat me to it.”

He smiled bitterly. “You didn’t trust I would do it, did you?”

“You can’t possibly blame me for that! You were adamant yesterday you weren’t going to.”

He shrugged. “Well, I did.”

“Why?”

Mr. Kwon stalled to speak. I noted he grew a little discomfited as he bowed his head and lightly kicked something on the ground. A stone, perhaps. Then he raised his chin up, his suddenly stony face meeting mine. “You said so yourself, it’s my responsibility.”

Now, why didn’t I believe that? Maybe because I was hoping it would have something to do with making up for his repulsive attitude awhile back? Then again, I chose to take his answer at face value.

Just as he started marching to the driver’s side of his car, I called him. He turned around, his eyes darting at me questioningly.

“I…I’m sorry…” I uttered nervously, “for what happened this afternoon. It was my fault. I did tell you to call me anyway if you needed a ride home. But…but I fell asleep and therefore lost track of time.”

Mr. Kwon didn’t reply. He carried on with boarding his car and then drove away. But later that night, just as I arrived back to my apartment, I received a text from him.

MAYBE I am sorry. too.
But as long as I find you annoying, I’ll keep on being MEAN to you.

Okay, it obviously wasn’t the nicest, mature apology I had hoped for. So why was I smiling like an idiot?

~*~

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