We’re sat at home on my sofa, Jeongmin is waiting for an answer. One I don’t want to give him… “I’m not leaving until you admit you love me too.” He suddenly says breaking the silence.

“Jeongmin… I do love you, you know that…” Before I can carry on he’s put his arm around me and pulled us almost cheek to cheek.

“How do you feel when we’re like this?”

I think to myself a minute… when we used to sleep in the same bed, I thought nothing of it, when we used to bath together when we were young I didn’t think about the fact we weren’t related, but now, now hes suddenly spoke about feelings its beginning to get really awkward when we’re close to each other. “I feel awkward.” I state.

“Is your heart beating faster? Like mine is…” He takes my hand and puts it over his chest, I feel his heart, it’s thumping hard and fast. Nothing like mine, mine is steady but jittery. He puts my hand back to my lap and then caresses my face. “I really love you Hyemi, you’re not dating anybody, why can’t we just try and see where it goes?”

I look him in the eyes and say calmly. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“You won’t.” He fires back.

I shake my head. “I don’t want our friendship to ever change, I don’t want to lose you and I don’t want us to become awkward in the future.” I stand up out of his arms and shout. “I don’t want to lie to you anymore!”

“Lie…” He repeats standing up and looking confused.

Then I realise what I’ve said. “No not lie, I mean I don’t want us to lose this… our friendship what if I try and then become selfish or meet someone else or you meet someone else! What if we fight and we never fight!”

“We’re kinda fighting now…” He says with a small and hopeless smile.

I sigh and lean my hand on his shoulder. “You’re right that I love you. But the love I have for you, is the same as the love I have for my own oppa, or your mother and father… that sort of trust and faith love. It’s not reckless and passionate. I wish I did love you like that because life would fall into place, but I don’t.”

He’s looking teary when I finish and suddenly he’s walking towards the door. “People can change, I’ll make you fall in love with me.” Then he closes the door and I’m left alone thinking about what Jiyong must think of me.

The next day in school I’m alone walking to maths thinking of how I could even try to explain myself to Jiyong, but to my surprise the class is empty. He’s always here early… “Is no one here?” I say knowing the room is empty but hoping he’s picking something up off the floor and I just can’t see him.

“Oh, Hyemi…” I turn to see Mrs Kang our old maths teacher stood in the doorway. “You’re never early for class, especially for maths?” She raises an eyebrow and then points to the desks. “Aren’t you sitting down?”

I nod. “Yes Miss…” I move towards my seat and then as I sit ask. “Where’s Mr Kwon? Is he ill or something?”

“Oh don’t tell me you’ve got a crush on your teacher, remember missy your too young for relationships, after your exams I’ll give you blessing to date people.” She smiles then starts organising the desk. “But no he’s not ill, he put in an application to transfer schools.”

“Transfer?” I stand up shocked.

She nods. “Yes, his last day is tomorrow, he’s currently at Hirin Boys Academy now talking over the transfer…”

I suddenly run out the classroom, I hear Miss Kang shouting after me but I don’t care. I also left my bag, phone and jacket at my desk… oh well I’ll be coming back at some point anyway. But for now I have to find Jiyong.

“Hyemi! Where are you going we have maths next?!” Minah shouts as I run past her.

Yuri continues. “Yeah, Mr Kwon won’t be very happy if you’re ditching!”

I ignore them and carry on running, I need to stop him from transferring, there’s no way I’m letting what happened with Jeongmin make him leave.