“I need a haircut.” Jinki stated the obvious at dinner a few days after Jonghyun’s birthday. “Everyone in training thinks I think I’m better than them since I keep wearing my hat so low and can’t look at them.”

“Why don’t we go tomorrow? Key can help you with that.” Jonghyun spoke like he was the leader now and he practically was. “I’ll tell the managers you can’t go to training. Then the three of us can go since we don’t have schedules.”

“I want to go too! I want to see Jinki-hyung’s new hair first!” Taemin looked at Jonghyun pleadingly, but the dino only shook his head.

“You and Minho both have schedules tomorrow. Since Key and I are free, we will go with him.” He stared at Taemin until the boy finally nodded and stepped down from trying to fight it. “Is that okay with you?”

“Yeah…” But Jinki’s eyes said otherwise, and Key pointed that out. Eventually, he cracked under the questioning of what was bothering him. “Won’t people recognize me if I go out with you two somewhere to get my hair cut? I don’t look the same as before, but it would be pretty obvious who I am if I’m seen with you two…” Chuckles from them only brought him more confusion. “What are you laughing at?”

“We can just get one of the stylists to do it. We don’t have to leave the company building.” Jonghyun explained it with his eyes twinkling with laughter. “But why are you scared of being recognized? Fans are going to find out what happened soon anyways.”

“They are?!” Jinki’s eyes widened to bigger than Minho’s in shock and Key smacked the back of Jonghyun’s head until his face went into his plate.

“Nice going, idiot! The managers were going to tell him tomorrow!” He ignored the questions from Jinki to degrade Jonghyun some more, and the oldest eventually turned to the two youngest.

Minho only shrugged, not knowing the news from being at a different schedule than the others. Taemin, on the other hand, was giving Jinki a knowing smile. “There’s going to be a press conference by the end of the month telling fans that you got in an army accident but are healing and are with us. It’s the damage control from the rumors that have been going around recently.”

“What rumors?”

“That you died.” The way Taemin said it so happily made Jinki question his sanity more than just a little.

As Jinki watched the burned crisps of what used to be hair fall from his head, he couldn’t help but be happy. He could ignore the stares from some of the stylists and the talk Key was having with the lady cutting his hair and the girls trying to pick out some new outfits for him and just enjoy the fact that one of the reminders of the whole accident was now going to be gone. His hair was going to be a lot shorter now, but he trusted the stylist to make it as nice as possible with what she had to work with.

So he spent the whole time watching the burned hair slid down the cape that protected him. Only when his hair was all cut and styled did he look up. The short hair was completely different from what he had and Jinki couldn’t help but reach up to touch it. “What do you think?”

“It’s better than I could have ever imagined. Thank you.” He dipped his head in thanks to the stylist while before looking at Key and Jonghyun, who both gave him huge smiles.

As they walked out of the makeup room where the makeover was done, Key and Jonghyun were both complimenting the new hair style. Jinki wasn’t paying much attention to it though, going through his own thoughts instead. What he didn’t mean to do was to think aloud. “Can we do the press conference earlier?”

“What?” Both Key and Jonghyun stopped, but it took Jinki a few steps to realize they weren’t with him. When he finally stopped and looked over his shoulder since it was hard to turn with the crutches, they were staring at him with shocked looks. “Why do you want the press conference earlier?!”

A few trainees who were rounding the corner to the empty hallways stopped to look at them and Jinki quickly turned his head so they wouldn’t see his face. Jonghyun noticed as well and placed a hand on Key’s shoulder, pulling the younger boy with him. “We’ll talk about this somewhere else. Without listening ears.” The trainees scurried off when they heard the last line.

Jonghyun led the way to an empty dance studio and the second the door was closed with the three of them inside, Key continued where he left off in the hall. “Why do you want it earlier? Weren’t you scared of fans knowing only yesterday?!”

The second part was cruel to bring up and they all knew it, but it was true. Jinki only sighed as he looked at the mirror instead of anyone else. He stayed silent and tried to mimic simple moves from dances while still balancing on his crutches, thinking. “…Taemin told me the rumors. That fans were starting to say I died. And I’ve read some things online on my own. That fans think I’m not going to come back, different things. A lot of them are things that could hurt SHINee, and I don’t want you guys hurt from me. I’m well enough to go on a stage and tell people I will be coming back, and I can pretend that I know everything from before if you guys help me know what it is that I can’t forget.” He stopped his little dance to face the two who were stunned into silence. “I promised Taemin I would be on stage with you guys by the end of the year. This would only be the first step of many to getting there.”

“I can’t believe we just did that…” Key glanced at the phone still open on the floor in the middle of the triangle the three of them made. “I still don’t agree with this…”

“Then why’d you help us convince manager-hyung?” Jonghyun gave a knowing smirk to the diva. “You just don’t want to admit that you agree with it.” He looked over at Jinki, looking the eldest in the eyes. “Tomorrow’s early enough for you, right?” His eyes twinkled with laughter at his joke, before turning a little more serious. “We have to tell the others and explain a little more to you about what to do, though. Be prepared for a late night tonight.”

“I just have to sit there and be quiet, right? Answer when asked a question specifically for me but don’t speak any other time? I learned about what to do in a press conference in my public image class.” Hyung needed a class for that when we have been public images for so long… That just isn’t right. Jinki gave them a smile of reassurance. “I’ve got this covered.”

Jonghyun only chuckled, knowing that wasn’t everything and that he was definitely going to be teaching Jinki some things later on. Until then, though, he could laugh at the simple logic. “We should get back to the dorm soon to tell Taemin and Minho.” In a single motion, he stood with Key and together they helped get Jinki back on his foot and leaning on his crutches.

They piled into a company van for the short ride, Jinki clinging to his seat and Key next to him the entire ride. Hyung shouldn’t be scared of car rides; he shouldn’t be clinging onto me. This isn’t right. What happened to the loveable and fearless leader we knew?

As soon as the car was parked, Jinki was unbuckling his belt and trying to get out of the car on his own. Key jumped out the other side to race around and let the elder out, but stopped when Jonghyun held a hand up by the car window. “Hyung, calm down.” Jinki wasn’t listening, still trying to get out of the car seat even though Jonghyun was holding the belt across him. “Hyung, listen to me. There is nothing to be afraid of. Calm. Down.”

He shook his head fast, pulling on the belt restraining him. “No no no no no. Get me out. Get me out of here right now.” Jinki yanked the belt, but it didn’t give. “Jonghyun, please, let me out of here.” His voice turned to pleading, fear dripping off of it, but Jonghyun still didn’t let go.

“There’s nothing to be afraid of hyung. You have to learn that a simple car ride is safe.” He finally released the belt to let Jinki up, but the eldest didn’t move now. “Hyung?”

Key flung the door open as soon as he saw the leader freeze up, not knowing what was happening. Before he could say anything though, Jinki let out an ear-piercing scream, startling both of the others. The driver that had started to walk towards the building started to jog back, but Key waved him off and left the man standing in confusion. “Get me out. Get me out, get me out, get me out. Get me out!” Jinki was literally shaking, his voice going hoarse from screaming but he didn’t stop.

“Hyung, you’re okay! I promise!” Key tried to grab onto Jinki’s hand, but the second he touched the disturbed man, it was pushed away. “Hyung, nobody is going to hurt you!”

“Jinki, calm down.” Jonghyun tried to be calmer than Key, whispering in Jinki’s ear. The only difference in his attempt was that Jinki threw his head to the side and smashed it into Jonghyun’s face. As the singer leaned back holding the beaten cheek, Jinki’s yell grew louder, if that was physically possible.

Key stepped back the second Jonghyun was hit, not trusting Jinki enough to touch him again. “Are you okay?” Jonghyun only nodded and both looked at the leader who wasn’t quite with them at the moment, trying to think of any way to calm the situation.

The yelling was too loud for either of them to hear the van that pulled in with Minho and Taemin in it, and it was definitely loud enough to be heard from inside the car. Before it had even stopped completely, Taemin was throwing the door open and jumping out, leaving Minho to scramble after him. The maknae was running full speed for the car that Key stood outside of, not even giving any signs of noticing his hyungs as he dove right for Jinki, wrapping his arms around the eldest. At first, there was a little protest before Taemin spoke. The second he did, Jinki’s blood-curdling scream faltered and ended. “Jinki-hyung, it’s okay; you’re okay. I’m here with you, nothing is happening. It’s just your imagination.” Whimpers escaped the injured man while the others could only watch in silence as Taemin held him so carefully and comforted him so easily. “Open your eyes, you can see it isn’t real.”

Jinki’s eyes cracked open the slightest bit, and he seemed startled to realize he was in the company van. “It… it wasn’t real?”

“I promise it wasn’t. What happened won’t happen again. I promised you that.” Taemin went to step back from Jinki, but he clung to the smaller boy’s shoulder. “I’m not leaving you, I promise. I just need Minho-hyung to help lift you out.”

But Jinki shook his head. “I can do it. Just don’t let go of me.” Taemin eventually nodded, hearing the resolve in Jinki’s voice to do it himself. With his eyes, he told Minho or Key to get the crutches while he supported most of Jinki’s weight. The eldest did eventually get out with only Taemin’s help and balanced himself on the crutches with shaky arms. The entire time, Taemin didn’t let go of him, always having at least a hand on Jinki’s shoulder.

As the youngest guided the oldest to the elevator, Key and Minho looked at Jonghyun who was still in the car. “What did he do that we couldn’t?”

“He knew everything that was upsetting Onew-hyung. Even more than you did, Jjong.” Nobody knew how to disagree with Key.