The five minutes you spent staring around the room after you woke up felt like hours to you. Your heart was frantically beating in your chest as you tried to understand what had happened. How the hell could you end up in an unfamiliar room and not be able to recall how you got there? There wasn’t even the slightest hint inside your mind that could give away where you were. Only him.  

Your head kept going over whatever you could possibly remember from the past night and the only thing that came up was Jiyong. His face, his smile, his scent, the way his laugh sounded. Only Jiyong. You kept thinking and thinking, wondering if any of your memories involved you and Jiyong in this bed. You had to admit part of you felt a bit tingly when thinking about it, yet the biggest emotions you felt were anger and irritation towards yourself. How could you possibly forget a night with G-Dragon? More importantly, a night with the guy you really liked? The worst part was that you weren’t even sure something happened. Quite frankly, the entire night was like one giant blur. So you knew nothing for sure. It wasn’t like you could just walk out of this room and ask him. How awkward would that be? And even if something happened, you would hate yourself for it. How cheap did that make you in Jiyong’s eyes? You didn’t want to be the kind of girl that got drunk and had on the first date. His impression of you certainly wouldn’t be good and you were sure a possible relationship seemed out of the question if you actually did that. “Ughh.” You groaned loudly before you covered your mouth in shock; you couldn’t be too loud. You knew he lived with his band members and for all you knew they were still asleep. And maybe, just maybe you could avoid getting out of this apartment without them knowing you were here in the first place. It was bad enough you had to admit to Jiyong you didn’t remember anything except for the kiss; you really didn’t want s to know it too. Oh god, how were you going to fix this? 

You got out of bed, another shock going through you as you noticed you were wearing a big shirt that definitely wasn’t yours. Another clue that pointed into the direction you didn’t want to face. This was bad. You tiptoed to the door, slowly opening it and peeking through. With a shock you spotted the boys in the couch in front of the door. Seriously, did his room really have to be right here? No way could you sneak out without them noticing you. “This is bad, so bad.” You told yourself before you rushed to the chair and grabbed your clothes. First thing to do: get dressed in your own clothes. Maybe you could pretend to the others you slept like that. As soon as that was done you breathed in deeply before opening the door again with a swing, ready to face the Big Bang members. Still, you froze completely as your eyes stared into the brown ones of Jiyong, who was – since it was hard not to notice – only wearing loose shorts. “___-ah! You’re up!” he grinned, looking very happy to see you. “Ehhr yeah…” you replied, giving him a weak smile in return. Honestly, you had no idea how you were supposed to feel right now. Happy? ty? Ashamed? Aroused because of his bared chest? Damn it, this was all so confusing.

“I should go, though.” You added, stepping past him and walking to the door before he grabbed your hand. “Aniyo, you shouldn’t.” he replied, giving you a nervous look. You were more than aware of the other eight eyes staring at you from the couch, witnessing this odd exchange.  “Why not?” you answered bothered with the fact he didn’t allow you to disappear with the little dignity you had left. “Because there are tons of paparazzi outside and you need to eat breakfast first. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day, come!” he replied, pulling you with him to the kitchen.

The feeling of his warm hand against yours made you feel all jittery and happy, not that you wanted to admit that to yourself. Besides, you were wondering what the hell he was talking about. Honestly, you were stunned after he mentioned this one word. “Paparazzi?” you asked out loud while he pushed you down on a chair and handed you a cup of cereals; you really didn’t feel like eating. “Why are they here?” “Well, apparently someone saw us come home last night and now they find it most interesting that there’s a girl inside our dorm.” He replied with a sad smile; you groaned instead. “Mianhae. I didn’t mean to cause something like that.” You replied, feeling guilty because of what you caused. This would be a scandal, no doubt.  “Don’t be, it is nothing.” He said, shrugging lightly before he softly patted your shoulder. Not that it stopped you from still feeling utterly guilty. “Why did you want to leave anyway? Didn’t you sleep well?” he then asked, changing the subject right away. You nervously bit your lip. “Aniyo, I slept very good. The bed is great actually.” You answered him. You were trying to figure out how you could tell him about how you felt. Could you just admit you had no memories anymore and feared he thought badly of you now? Sorry I am a but don’t remember it? Sorry I got so drunk on our first date and only remember you kissing me? Was that even something you could say without making it worse?  

“Yeah I figured that wasn’t it, since you also made that remark last night when I tucked you in.” he replied with a small chuckle. All alarms went off in your head. What did he just say? “What?” you said, your big eyes growing wider every second. “I said you also made that remark that last night.” He repeated, staring at you because he clearly didn’t get what the big deal was. He probably wondered if you were deaf or something “Aniyo! After that!” you said a bit louder. “When I tucked you in?” he said, biting his lip as if he was ashamed of it. He clearly had no idea how you felt at the moment. “You…You tucked me in?” you replied, hardly believing it. Did that mean nothing happened? “Neh.” He said nodding weakly. “Someone had to make sure you slept in a bed instead of a bathtub. You did try that by the way, after you changed into my shirt.” He replied with a smirk on his face; obviously he thought the memory was amusing. You could only groan. “I did that? Oh god.” You sighed, burying your blushing face in your hands. Why did you have to be such an idiotic drunk person? Although, it was a relief he wasn’t the one who undressed you, you probably still looked like a fool in his eyes.

“Wait… you don’t remember?” he exclaimed, staring at you. Slowly, you dared glancing between your fingers. “Ehmm.. Actually…” “CHINCHA? Nothing at all?!” he exclaimed, making you shush him. “Don’t let the others hear it. And yes, I don’t remember most of it. I do remember you k…”  That’s when you lost your words. You weren’t sure if he would like to be reminded of the kiss the two of you shared. You loved it and all, but what if he didn’t? Then again, the two of you possibly did more. Or perhaps not since he said he tucked you in and didn’t mention anything else. “I, what?” he asked. You assumed your face was bright red by now. “I…I…sort of remember a…a…kiss.” you said, practically mumbling the last word in fear of getting rejected. Maybe that memory was really blurry too? Maybe that part was actually a dream? Oh boy. Suddenly a smile came onto his face. “Is that all you remember?” he asked as he put the pieces together.  ‘Oh please no, don’t tell me there’s more.’ You thought as you stared at him. “Is there more?” you almost whispered; he started laughing. “What do you remember?” he asked, voice warm and slightly husky. Now you really lost it.

“Didn’t you hear me?! Nothing! Nothing at all! That’s the damn freaking problem! That’s why I tried to leave because I was too afraid to admit I can’t recall what happened. And oh my god what did happen? You must think so badly of me! Like I’m some kind of ! ” you blurted, standing up and freaking out. You were pacing through the room, completely losing it and blushing like crazy. You hardly noticed how Jiyong looked at you with an amused expression on your face. But then he appeared in front of you and pinned both your arms against your body. “___-ah relax.” He said, making you blink at him in surprise. “Nothing happened.” He added with a grin. “Nothing? Nothing at all?” you asked, biting your lower lip. Maybe you sort of regretted not doing anything with him…You became awfully aware of that when his half body was that close. You tried to erase those thoughts from your head… it so not was the moment for that. “Well you did try actually, but no.” he smirked. “Oh I’m sorry for that.” You sighed in annoyance with yourself. “You should be. It was really hard to say no to such a beautiful woman, you know.” He said. All of a sudden he was really close to you. Your eyes locked with his again and immediately you were reminded of the photoshoot the two of you had. You remembered clearly how badly you wanted to kiss him back then and today wasn’t any different. Your eyes focused on his rosy lips, how they looked so kissable and soft.

“Though I couldn’t do it when you were like that. I want to know your heart’s fully into it.” he replied, smiling at you. You didn’t care if it was corny; it made your heart melt and thousands of butterflies explode inside of you. To think Jiyong actually cared that much about you that he would ignore his own natural instincts, was more than wonderful. Still, it made you nervous to think of what you did. More than nervous actually. But then his hand was on the side of your face, his thumb softly caressing the pinkness of your cheek.  You felt how your knees were getting weaker and weaker. You wanted to feel his lips upon yours right now. You needed it, you were positive you would go crazy if you didn’t get what you wanted. “It… It is.” You mumbled.

And instantly his sweet lips pressed lightly against yours as if your words were his cue. It was not like the kiss from last night, it was much softer and really gentle. You noticed how his mouth tasted a bit like chocolate and it made you smile. You felt him smile back against your lips in between small kisses, before his arms wrapped around you and he deepened the kiss. You kissed him back, the pressure of his lips making a fire-like warmth flood your body and making your head dizzy. Every doubt you had about how he perhaps felt about you seemed to disappear in the softness of the kiss you shared. Jiyong pulled you close against his chest while you ran your fingers through his dark hair. It felt like silk and you were completely lost in the intensity of the kiss. Though then it ended in a flash… literally.

Before you knew it Jiyong had pulled away and ran to the window of his kitchen. Your heart was hammering in your chest as you realized what just happened. A photographer had managed to make his way up the emergency stairs of their dorm, ending up right in front of the kitchen window and having a rather nice view of the both of you kissing. Of course the two of you had been too preoccupied to notice his presence until his not so subtle flash had trigger your attention. ‘This isn’t good.’ You sighed as you heard Jiyong curse loudly and call for his friends. This isn’t good at all…