AN: just keep tissu nearby, you'll probably need it.... this is the last chapter!!!

 SeungHyun was lost in the contemplation of the sleeping JiYong, brushing lightly his dark brown hair. That made SeungHyun smile, in fact, JiYong wasn't really the crazy one who loved changing his hair every month or so, that was G-Dragon persona, so it was not so surprising that he had chosen his natural hair color for this important day. A knock on the door woke SeungHyun up from his thought, breaking the timeless feeling.

“JiYong, are you awake? I've brought you food, you need to eat you know... JiYong... please, come out of your room, you can't lock yourself in forever. JiYong?” but YoungBae's voice couldn't reach the younger immersed in his deep slumber and SeungHyun wouldn't leave his side, he would never leave him again.

~~~~~~~~~~~

a few weeks before

Seven years had flown like it was nothing more than a few days. Everyone, except JiYong's parents, was getting used to see those two being all lovey dovey all the time, even Yang Goon who was, at first, a little worried that their relationship could have an impact on BIGBANG became a hardcore GTOP shipper. Moreover, every members protecting their hyungs' secret was finally a good training for cohesion and made the band members even closer. Everything didn't went smoothly though, as every other couple, they had get their ups and their downs but nothing their love couldn't overcome. Their fusional relationship kept them from being mad at each other longer than a few hours and they knew better than wasting their time together for insignificant quarrels after all, they had fought against bigger obstacles to get together.

So seven years was a step that they passed brightly that's why that night all the Nuthang clan and the YG family were invited in a ultra select night club to mark the occasion. SeungHyun also planned another event for this night and was a little, to say the last, stressed over it. He already had spent more hours in the bathroom than JiYong would, while the latter had been sent back home with a “It would be fun if we didn't see each other before the party, it will remind us the thrill of our first dates”. He was already running late but he couldn't really decide between his Saint Laurent lambskin biker jacket or his Vivienne Westwood suit blazer, the two matching with the Alexander McQueen satin finished skinny jeans and the Givenchy bandage strapped shoes. A few hours later, he finally decide for the suit blazer as it fitted both, his outfit and the event.

SeungHyun was awfully late when he barged in the VIP space of the club one hour after the set hour “Sorry guys I'm … late” the last word died in his throat seeing a sulking JiYong swagging in the middle of all their friends. His brain stopped, his heart exploded and he couldn't help but drool at the sight, JiYong made a point to look as hot as he could tonight. And his bottom lips orned by a black ring piercing pushed out in a pouting manner was just adding to his iness. His KTZ Beret didn't completely hide his half long jet black hair highlighted by dark red strands, the Dolce&Gabbana black biker leather jacket was open on a too loose Chrome Hearts white tank top giving a glimpse of the creamy and tattooed skin of his collarbones, his thin legs were tucked into a Balmain crumpled skinny jeans which probably was a female design before going through the expert hands of SeungHo. The outfit was completed by one of JiYong favorite pair of Louboutin pony sneakers, a collection of heavy Chrome Hearts rings, bracelets and watch contrasting on his thin fingers and his delicate wrists, as well as Vivienne Westwood necklaces hanging on the white top and a Pot Revenge chained choker showing off his neck line.

SeungHyun gulped down as JiYong stood up and advanced towards him, a smirk flashed on the younger lips before the return of that sulking pout. When he was inches away from the late man he ran a finger across the broad chest, drawing small patterns before tugging at the blazer chain forcing his hyung to come closer to him, while chocolate orbs were pleadingly looking at the older man face under long fluttering eyelashes.

“Hyuuuung...” JiYong whinned “ you're late!! you made me wait a loooong hour.... Hyuuuuung“ SeungHyun tried to swallow the constricting lump that had formed in his throat but with his heavy breathing he could only stutter “I... I... I... “ JiYong tiptoed, pulling a little more on the chain until he was close enough to whisper into his lover's ear

“I would probably forgive you if you got me a drink... Hyunnie” JiYong's smirk went wider when a chill ran down SeungHyun's spine. The latter his heels and headed to the counter at the other end of the club, releasing the breathe he didn't know he had been holding when he didn't feel his lover gaze on his back anymore.

“You got nerve JiYong, you hardly arrived twenty minutes before him!” the small man sheepishly smiled to Se7en “I couldn't help it! He was too cute with his jaw on the floor!” JiYong strangled the small chuckle that followed when he heard SeungHyun clearing his throat behind him. DonWook laughed at the caught face of JiYong, the younger of the Choi brother put the Cuba Libre in his lover's hands kissing his cheek before seating on the sofa near his hyung, sipping his Jake and coke while the said hyung couldn't help but mock JiYong for his flustered face.

“Now that everyone is here let's raise our glasses to our YG best couple so we can go crazy drinking and dancing! To GTOP....” “KANPEI!!!” JiYong silently thanked JaeSang for his good timing. It distracted everyone for the few second he needed to bring his brain to work again, so now he could settle himself on the lap of his lover stealing a light kiss in the process.

Everything went well until the appearance of ... Mizuhara Kiko. For some minutes the loud music seemed to fade as the happily chats turned into murmuring interrogations. Kiko's face was dead white, some of her cousins had never gone to Korea and she had volunteered to take them visit her grandmother's native land, since she had already come a couple of times. But out of all the night clubs that existed in Seoul, she was stupefied that they had to go in the only one her ex-boyfriend and his boyfriend had chosen to celebrate their love. Nausea rose to her lips and she was ready to ask for going somewhere else when one of her cousins came with two full bottles of vodka, glasses, and redbull.. she painfully followed her overjoyed family members but not without a snort. She should already had moved on but seeing them wrapped around each other, exposing their happiness, reminded her how she was still alone and how she had never really got over this, how she had still doubted every single of her past boyfriends, and their best friends,...

Seeing Kiko awakened a little JiYong's culpability so he disentangled himself from his lover pretending to go dancing, but not without kissing the latter on the cheek for reassurance. SeungHyun closed his fist on the ring in his pocket wondering whether he should do this or not in front of the poor Kiko. Of course he was still not fond of the girl but he guessed that it should not be easy for her either. But, ! It was more than seven years ago and he had planned this for weeks now! So he breathed in deeply and stood up, the hand still crisped around the little ring of metal. He whispered some words to the DJ and the volume of the music decreased, SeungHyun, then, took a microphone, a deep breath and closed his eyes ready to tell the speech he had prepared for so long.

“Please forgive me for the interruption, but I have something I want to say, and I want you all witnessing what I'm about to do.” He knew that the nervousness would make him rambling or saying things in a clumsy way so he tried to calm himself, taking another deep breath, opening his eyes to see everybody hung on his lips. “I.... I...” And another deep breath was taken, just what he needed to straighten his mind “I know that it's still not legal in Korea but I think that it's the right thing to do, I want to made things official and take the engagement as deep as “normal” people can, so...” SeungHyun fidgeted a little to take the engagement ring out of his pocket. He smile a little at the big black diamond and its little brothers crimped all around the platinum circle “JiYong, I love you so much already and my feelings are growing deeper and deeper with each passing days. I know that I've taken you away from your parents and I'm so sorry for that so I want to officially create a new family. JiYong, would you mar....”

…

Kiko was surprised to see JiYong coming to her like ten minutes after her awkward entrance. He came asking for forgiveness, she would if she could but she felt the bitter taste her words left on her tongue as the salty tears burned its way down her cheeks. Her heart softened a little seeing the genuine feeling of guilt in JiYong's eyes, but the wound wasn't healed yet and this conversation just added some salt on it. She was about to dismiss the uncomfortable JiYong when SeungHyun started his little speech. This was too much for her heart, how they could do that just in front of her? How could they ruin her life again? The envy, the jealousy, the anger, … all her worst her and most painful feelings were invading her chest watching the evidence of the love those two had for each other. She felt like they had stolen all her hopes to experience that kind of emotion, and the urge to destroy all of this was shutting the tiny voice of her reason and conscience. She knew that she would regret her act but she couldn't help it and made the move that would break everything. When JiYong left running after his real love, realization hit her and she felt sick, dirty, pathetic,... She sunk to the floor sobbing some “I'm sorry, I'm so sorry...”.

…

SeungHyun felt his heart being ripped in his chest, the pain was physically so strong that he was doubled up, hot tears running down his face. His eyes were searching for JiYong when he had said his last sentences and he had found him in the crowd, eyes reddened by what he assumed to be happy tears, but when he was about to ask him to marry him, Kiko's mouth was on JiYong's one. He was broken by the sight of the kiss, by the fact that JiYong didn't push her back, by the thought that it was Kiko, of all people it had to be Kiko, and now, when it should be the most important moment of their life, NOW! So when his legs could have supported him he had run away, he couldn't face all the sympathetic stares of their friends, neither the fight with the involved girl nor the explanation of JiYong. In fact he even feared this last one, what if JiYong wanted to go back with her, his life would be easier. Should he be egoistic enough to tell him to stay with him when the girl he dated the longest was back? Besides that meant he could have his father back too, and he knew the man was still the number one in his phone speed dial, it was her who ended their relationship not him so maybe he still loved her all this time, … SeungHyun knew that his rambling thoughts weren't based on anything, that they were just silly lies that his lack of confidence was pushing into his mind but he couldn't suppress neither the hurt of seeing his fiancé kissed by his ex, neither the tiny voice in his head that whispered that “maybe it's true...”

…

JiYong was stuck in place by the shock. He thought he should take advantage of the girl's presence to apologize for using her for selfish reasons, that he had not thought of the girl's feelings, that it was all his fault, etc... But as always nothing went as planned, Kiko wasn't ready to forgive him, she cried, deepening the petite man's guilt with her words and tears. JiYong was lost for words when the music seemed to stop and a deep voice that made his heart skip a few beats started to babble. Forgetting completely the girl, he turned to the small stage near the DJ space to see his lover on one knee saying words that he wouldn't even dream to hear but that he needed so bad in the same time. Hot tears running on his face, coming straight from his touched heart, he stopped breathing looking ahead to the meaningful question when something he didn't see coming happened. His mind already frozen by SeungHyun proposal, he didn't register that lips were upon his until he was stuck again under the shock of what was happening. He brought himself to react when he saw his lover running off the club, he pushed Kiko away and chased after SeungHyun, sobbing as he realized the situation.

“Hyunnie!! Wait!! Oh God! Hyunnie, wait for me... Please... … Don't leave me, Please... Hyunnie!!” SeungHyun finally heard JiYong and stopped in his track. JiYong had run after him, he didn't stay with her, he had chased after him, he was screaming for him, he was crying for him, … he loved him! His doubts vanished as he saw the stream of tears on his loved one's cheeks. He rushed back crossing the road that was separating them.

'You're kidding me!! That's so cliché!! That couldn't be real...' SeungHyun couldn't help but laugh, at last inwardly, at his thought while the car hit his body. He was so engrossed in going back to JiYong that he didn't pay attention to his surrounding, stupidly he didn't see neither heard the car coming his way. But now he heard it, the screeching of the brake, the heartbreaking cry of JiYong,... He felt it too, the hit, he felt his bones breaking, his head crashing into the ground, his ribs perforating his lungs, his spleen, his liver,... he felt the blood flooding in his body,... It hurt so much that SeungHyun easily welcomed the numbness overwhelming him few minutes, maybe only few seconds, later. He just had the time to see JiYong bending over his cooling body. He didn't saw his life running before his eyes, before dying, the only thing that SeungHyun saw, the only thing that he thought about, was JiYong. As a black fog covered his vision, his last words passed through his lips “I'm... so... sorry... Love...” SeungHyun couldn't help but to think that things would have been more dramatic with JY painfully crying, the ambulance coming, paramedics commenting, medical devices beeping,.... he really had watched too much drama... But finally everything faded, the long beep of the engine accompanied with a desperate scream from his lover throat was the last thing his ears caught.

~~~~~~~~~~~

What SeungHyun hadn't expected was to “wake up”, the dark veil lifted and he was in his villa, watching the scene like he was suspended to the roof of his bedroom. Below him, his tiny lover was sobbing in his sleep, curled up in the bed. A few days should have passed by, it looked like JiYong had lost some weight, that tended to be confirmed by the untouched tray of food on the farthest night stand, while the photography of their five years anniversary in which an over-smiling SeungHyun back hugged JiYong who was kissing his cheek, was set in a wooden frame on the nearest one instead of in one of their pictures albums scattered on the floor. The sight broke the older heart, but a tiny hope rose in his chest when he heard YoungBae entering the house and calling for the leader, if someone could help Ji it had to be the mohawked man.

“Ji man it's me! Are you ok? Did you eat?” YoungBae lowered his voice when he saw that his best friend was asleep. “... at least he sleeps a little, he must be exhausted ... aish he didn't eat anything today either” YoungBae spoke to himself clearing the tray. SeungHyun worried by the other speaking, tried to interact with him, he moved, not without difficulties, near the man, tried to call him, to touch him but YoungBae seemed oblivious to him. 'Aish how do those ghosts do in movies?' YoungBae even walked through his ethereal body without blinking or even shivering. SeungHyun finally gave up after a few more attempts of interaction, it made him smile that even after death communication wasn't his forte. So he resolved to just watch from afar, and that's how he ended looking over JiYong for he doesn't know how long, days, weeks maybe.

JiYong did nothing else than crying loudly when he was awake or sobbing in his sleep, the only words passing through his lips were when he was desperately calling SeungHyun's name or when he screamed and fought everybody who tried to make him eat, bath or move out of the room. One day, YoungBae came speaking about funeral and things the younger obviously wouldn't listen to like it wasn't his fault and that with time he would heal,... JiYong screamed his lungs out to cover the smaller one voice and used his last energy to push a tearing YoungBae out of the room before locking the door. So, now, his fragile body didn't to fight any other already lost battle. Since then, SeungHyun spent his time trying to sooth the pain of the man he loved beyond life, he noticed that JiYong seemed to feel him, the latter seemed to smile faintly when his ghostly fingers would brush against his features, he would calm a little when he would touch his hand, his arm or his back. But he never heard SeungHyun exhorting him to eat, to go out or to move on,...

SeungHyun let hope get into him again that morning, when JaeSang came, the man had said something about the fact that SeungHyun would probably be sad to see him in this state, that he should get better so SeungHyun could rest in peace and everyone who loved him could stop worrying about him, and that he had brought something SeungHyun would want him to have. Even knowing that nobody could see him, the ghost couldn't help but nod in agreement during the older speech. After JaeSang was gone, when JiYong wake up to open the door and took the object on the floor, SeungHyun thought that maybe the older words had reached the other. And the fact that JiYong actually seemed to be more active tended to confirm it, the young man spending some time in the bathroom, trying to look more human, at his desk writing, putting music on,... But SeungHyun knew the man better, so any small fraction of hope vanished when he saw JiYong's tears falling on the platinum ring decorated with black diamonds the younger had put on his finger. 

AN: Don't hate me!!!! please don't hate me!!!! I warned you, pure angst here!!! /needed to exorcise my begin-of-a-new-year saddness so I come to that..../ Epilogue should come soon (like juste a few minutes)