AN: Can't keep you waiting!! 

We're going angstier and angstier until the end.... underlined words means internet links if you want to see what I have in head go for it.... please tell me what you think of it.... even if as always I'm just really thankful you just read it!!! For the last song of course it's 결국 from GD "One Of A Kind" album... (For the translation it's not mine I took it on internet but I don't remember where so I can't put credit so it's the work of whoever translated it.... )

 JiYong was immersed in a silent sleep again, so SeungHyun wandered in the room a little. A small tear escaping when he caressed the framed photography on one of the night stand. It hurts to know that it had to finish this way, like all the tough moments they had gone through together meant nothing. He would prefer to see JiYong living an happy life even after they were separated. He wiped another tear away with the back of his hand looking at what was also on the night stand. He used to see JiYong suffer and he had always felt kind of responsible so their usually shared words “I'm sorry, I'm so sorry...” passed through his lips more easily than truly comforting ones.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Flashback

One hundred days anniversary! JiYong was stuck in one of his favourite shop searching a gift for SeungHyun. Not that he was so much into those romantic stuffs but he thought that his hyung would appreciate if he made the effort. Even if in fact he just loved nagging at why Koreans had to have so much of lovers' days or anniversary and he also had to admit that he loved the fact that The Official Pimp never missed an occasion to take him out in a classy restaurant or in a wine bar or to offer him small gifts. So for once he was willing to be the one who would take the initiative but for now, he couldn't find anything until his attention was caught by a ring called “Hidden Love” and so he knew what he would offer his lover.

The D-day, of course SeungHyun would have booked a private room in a expensive French restaurant (that way he could drink rare wine). JiYong's jaw dropped to the floor when they entered the hall of Pierre Gagnaire restaurant, he had to know who the designer was because that person was a genius! And the private room was even better, okay that was fancy but that was also modern and everything JiYong liked. SeungHyun smirked, actually pleased by the younger reaction and that was not the end, he had even searched online the menu so he had the time to learn how to order in the Molière language. As planned the Great Dragon eyes went as wide as saucers when his hyung talked in a strong accented French, this latter was a little relieved that the awe-stuck man didn't notice the half smirk of the waiter at the killing of French grammar though.

After their Baba au rhum was served JiYong cleared his throat, trying to ignore the heat in his cheeks, he put a little package on the table pushing it in SeungHyun's direction.

“Happy hundredth days Hyunnie!” little tears gathered in SeungHyun eyes but he successfully held them in for now.

“God! Thank you Ji! You shouldn't... you know that wasn't necessary.” he took the small silver ring into his hand, recognizing Chrome Hearts stamp he smiled, of course JiYong had to choose something that he would like for himself... but his thought was cut by the smaller nervous voice.

“Look, you can open it here.” the little blonde took the ring opening a part of it and letting appear the carved words With Love, then he took the older's left hand making the other hold his breath at what he thought was coming.

“Let me...” and he placed the ring on the ring finger, painting SeungHyun cheeks into the same crimson red which heated his own. JiYong had to take a deep breath before announcing the next...

“The ring is called Hidden love Hyung, and I think that we've been hiding long enough! SeungHyun... I'm offering you this ring to represent our past: the years of our unconfessed love and those one hundred days of shared one. But starting from today I wish we could share our happiness with our friends, who probably have already guessed, and our families. I would like to tell our loved ones that I've found the one who makes me feel complete, my soulmate, the one I'll love with all my life and even more. Would you do that with me?” by the end of JiYong little speech, SeungHyun was stuck, heavy warm drops falling down his face tainting the tablecloth.

“Yes! Of course I would” he answered quickly wiping his eyes with the back of his hands. They waited the couple of second they needed for their breathing to come back at a steady rhythm before suffocating themselves in a mind blowing kiss. Expensive meal, wine, beautiful surrounding, shocked waiter,... everything was long forgotten. SeungHyun hurriedly paid the bill, more like throwing his credit card at the waiter, not wanting his lips anywhere but on his lover's ones. The same scene repeating itself with a really uneasy taxi driver who just drove them back to SeungHyun's villa. Their kisses promising their hundredth night to be a beautiful enhancement of the first one.

~~~~~~~~~~~

SeungHyun's mother had known her son's ual preference before he had known it himself. She had always tried to instil value like love and tolerance to her children. She had always repeated them that falling in love was something between two hearts, two souls, not two bodies so it doesn't matter what the gender is as long as it's love, it's not wrong, that body attraction is just lust and that's not wrong either as long as love is also involved. So she already had a long time for getting used to the idea that SeungHyun was gay and she didn't mind too much as long as he's happy and she's still his number one confident.

Mrs Choi had also known for her son and JiYong since he had acknowledged his feelings for the other man. She was the one who had comforted her heartbroken baby, preventing him to spend so much more drunken nights (or days) than he had already done. She also knew JiYong enough to be sure that he would take a good care of her bingu son and she understood how their relationship evolved when she didn't have to sooth SeungHyun's pain away anymore neither had a visit of her Mommy's boy in the last three months.

So, the announcement to the Choi family consisted on just telling the news to HyeYoon. The latter just squealed, fangirling at the fact that she got the infamous G-Dragon as her brother in law... Okay she was a little jealous since she had always had a little crush on her brother's best friend but nothing serious enough to mess the joy she felt seeing her little brother beaming in happiness. It was hurting her heart too much to see him depress over the last years and not being able to do anything to protect her younger sibling. So she couldn't suppress the goofy smile on her lips until her zygomatic muscles hurt too much.

The way SeungHyun family welcomed their relationship warmed JiYong a little, even if he knew that it would not be as easy with his own parents. He had always been close to them and they were quite open minded on a lot of topics but things like uality was a subject he had never brought home so much unless his fame had forced him to.... He could still remember how his father reacted at the scandal his first live concert had caused, how he had started yelling at him, saying he had embarrassed him, that because of him, he wouldn't be able to look at people in the eyes, … Of course he had softened when he had seen how much it had affected his son and even apologized for his harsh words. But the fact that he had reacted violently first made JiYong dread a little the encounter.

But JiYong had made his mind so he straightened his heart, a lot helped by the warm hand wrapped around his one while he called his mother to inform her that SeungHyun and him wished to come over for a family meeting breakfast that Sunday. Mrs Kwon happily complied, she would love to have all her family around her and she loved SeungHyun as her own son since … since forever. As soon as JiYong hung up, she called DaMi to invite her daughter, son in law and her beautiful baby grandson too.

The end of the week came quickly for the two busy idols. Maybe it came a little too fast for JiYong's liking, he barely slept the Saturday night, apprehension turning into slight fear. The little blonde was looking at the number of his digital clock turning, when a quite loud snort surprised him, he turned his head to watch his boyfriend stirring in his sleep wrapping his arms around JiYong's waist. A smile twisted the lips of this latter, the heat of his lover on his back calming him and he affirmed his decision to tell his family no matter what the consequences would be since he had been quite sure now that he couldn't live without SeungHyun. Only hen he could let the slumber of sleep invade him.

The Kwon family enjoyed their meal catching up since it had been a long time since they last were all reunited like that. But when Mrs Kwon presented the Baba au rhum SeungHyun had brought with him, JiYong took a deep inspiration and the hold of his lover hand tightened a little under the table.

“Mom, Dad, … *erm* … There's something I … we want to tell you ...” JiYong swallowed the nervous ball that constricted his throat, he felt another pressure on his hand and took it as encouragement.

“Sweety?! Why are you so pale? What do you want to say?” seeing her son fidgeting on his seat made Mrs Kwon a little uneasy about the news and she felt like the calm and happy family moment was coming to an end. JiYong swallowed painfully again.

“There's someone I … *erm* … someone I would like to introduce to you as the one I would, no I will spend my life with. I know that it will surprise you and maybe you won't understand but.... but I really love him more than anything and he makes me truly happy. I want to let you know first, before even YG because you're my family, my most important ones. I know that you probably won't understand but I would be eternally grateful if you, at last, tried...”

“OMO Sweety that's a wonderful news!!! I'm so happy for ….” Mrs Kwon was so relieved and engrossed by the first sentence that was out of the lips of her son that she didn't really listen to the rest and failed to notice the slight fear and shocked expression on her daughter's face neither the frown on her husband one

“NO! NEVER! I WILL NEVER ACCEPT THAT! IT WAS NOT ENOUGH FOR YOU TO BRING OUR NAME IN SHAME WITH ALL THOSE SCANDALS, NOW YOU EXPECT ME TO AGREE WITH THAT? DON'T YOU DARE TO EVEN ASK ME THAT!”

“Yeobo!?” Shocked by her husband's outburst Mrs Kwon jumped in fear when Mr Kwon slapped both his hands flat on the table, toppling his chair as he stood. He sent a daggered gaze to SeungHyun.

“YOU'RE NO MORE WELCOMED UNDER MY ROOF! BOTH OF YOU” and on that he left the room letting a frightened JiYong and a silently crying SeungHyun explain his reaction to the still stunned Mrs Kwon.

“Why did he react like that?! Sorry SeungHyun-ah, don't mind him, you too Sweety, he will calm down as always... So who is that girl? I would love to meet her, you should have brought her with you today...”

“I have Mom!” JiYong cut his mother rambling, looking down and letting the tears gathered in his eyes fall down. He brought his and SeungHyun's holding hands on the table for everyone to see their intertwined fingers “I have … he's not a girl Mom ... That's SeungHyun!” Mrs kwon opened in disbelief, closed it looking at how her son and his best friend were linked, and opened it a last time trying to say something, but nothing came. She only could mutter a tiny “I … I'll need time... sorry son. You should leave now, both of you... sorry SeungHyun...” before following her husband in the living room, silent tears tainting her cheeks with mascara.

DaMi stood up silently and came hugging her little brother “I love you brother! I'm on your side, don't give up! The almighty Dragon should never give up isn't it” she kissed his cheek wiping away her brother tears and tightened a little her grasp when she couldn't hold hers anymore. Breaking the embrace, she patted SeungHyun shoulder “Took a good care of my precious brother! If you've made him go through this and make him suffer more, I'll kill you!!” Her gaze was more of a sympathetic one than a threatening one but SeungHyun knew that each one of her words was truly meant so he forced a little smile on his lips to show her his will to make JiYong happy. Nothing left to be said here so they stood up as well, their goodbye falling into silence before they were out the door.

As soon as they walked out the door, SeungHyun wrapped himself around the tiny shaking frame, tightening the embrace as much as he could without breaking the other's bones. JiYong's tears quenched his shirt and his heart at the same way. “Ji … God Ji! I love you! I will forever! I'm with you! Forever! Oh my god JiYong I'm sorry, I'm so sorry...” That night, JiYong didn't sleep at all, he spent the night crying in his lover's arms hearing the lethargy he knew by heart “I'm sorry, I'm so sorry...”. 

All those years did nothing, JiYong's father would never calm down and time seemed to never be long enough to his mother to accept them. JiYong's heart was like ripped in two, like his parent took a part of it letting a hole behind. But JiYong had always felt like the only reason of why his picky heart was beating was SeungHyun's presence next to him. So he never had regretted his decision even if it hurt like hell, he knew that he just could not choose another path, every paths he could have taken without the tall brunette beside him must lead him to an early death.

~~~~~~~~~~~

SeungHyun watched JiYong cringe into a foetal position in his sleep, another whine escaping his lips. “Dad …. Seung....” The two words and the small tear rolling down the hollowed cheek stabbed SeungHyun's heart as hard as a dagger: he knew what kind of dream haunted his lover and he could feel guilt invade him and, like every time the smaller one made the cruel nightmare he whispered in his ear their shameful words “I'm sorry, I'm so sorry...”. JiYong's hand tensed around the now slightly crisped letter he was holding against his heart. The words of the song the latter's mp3 was playing in loop on the little speaker kicked in SeungHyun mind, it was describing nearly perfectly what lingered in front of his eyes “In The End.... in the end, there's love, no end, we couldn't part...”

Love is painful all the love is painful.
Repeating like a fool. That’s what I always do.
But pain is beautiful. It’s same as you.
Hope turns into disappointment. Wish turns into despair.
As love deepened, pain deepened more
Illusion or expectation that this time, it’ll be different, uh.
eventually, how many years have passed, there is no “forever”.
eventually, We’re not meant to be, become alone again.
barely, barely, barely, I thought I finally found my love.
eventually, eventually, It’s ended again like this.

My mind is not changed from the very first
but my mind is now full of wounds cuz of you
Cuz of your cold voice, I’m changing, I’m getting cold as well
It’s hard to get back, between you and me
we are drifting farther and farther apart from each other
It’s hard to go around each other
So I gave parting to you as a gift and turned my back
I’m falling without you

Eventually whose fault is it. There’s no love.
Eventually I’m saying goodbye to you. Tired, I’m falling asleep.
barely barely barely, it seems like this is an end between us.
Eventually eventually, we’re becoming strangers.

My mind is not changed from the very first
but my mind is now full of wounds cuz of you
Cuz of your cold voice, I’m changing, I’m getting cold as well.
It’s hard to get back, between you and me
we are drifting farther and farther apart from each other
It’s hard to go around each other
So I gave parting to you as a gift and turned my back
I’m falling without you

Let’s go
I didn’t know at first. I liked the empty place which was hers.
After several days, at last I thanked her.
I didn’t know about myself
didn’t know about the confidence that I could live without you.
tomorrow which is different from today
1 year, 2 years. regret is getting deeper as much as the pain.
I pray everything will be changed as time goes
for you my baby.

My mind is not changed from the very first
but my mind is now full of wounds cuz of you
Cuz of your cold voice, I’m changing, I’m getting cold as well
It’s hard to get back, between you and me
we are drifting farther and farther apart from each other
It’s hard to go around each other
So I gave parting to you as a gift and turned my back

I’m falling without you