It had already been two weeks since that day, that day when I cried and he apologized. These two weeks were like hell for me. He called me and sent me messages but I didn't answer. It seems that this time he hurt me in a serious way and the scars would take some time to completely close. I don't know if I'm exaggerating but don't you think the same as me? Oh well, I shouldn't think about him, if I think more about him, I think I'll burst.

Today I decided to go to the park near my house to unwinding a little. I sat on the garden bench and looked to the small tulips that swayed in the wind. I remember perfectly when Youngjae asked me to be his girlfriend. It was in this same park and he gave me a tulip as a gift. Aish, why everything I do reminds me of him? Why is where I go, I carry him always in my mind? Aish, I messed my hair and my phone started ringing, startling me. With one hand on the chest, I took the phone from the bag and looked at the screen. It was Sunni.

“Yeoboseyo.”

"Oh my dear friend, how are you?" She asked cheerfully. She didn't know what had happened because I hadn't told her nor remembered. I have so much in mind and that 'so much' is called: Youngjae.

"I'm fine, and you?" I asked omitting the truth but my voice was a little shrill. I didn't want to worry her, much less wanted to remember that day.

"______, don't lie to me. I already know you. It was Youngjae, right?" She asked me in a low voice, I could tell she was a little worried, it wasn't worth omitting the truth, she always finds everything, even if I don't want.

“Bingo.” I looked at the tulips and touched one of the red petals.

"Let me guess. The third step didn't go as expected."

"Bingo, again." I sighed and looked at the sky. Yoo Youngjae, Yoo Youngjae, Yoo Younjae, my mind screamed his name all the days, hours and even seconds, I might as well say, always, my mind was always shouting his name since that day.

"______, never mind that, after all, you can’t successfully complete all the steps. Life is like that, the best you have to do is continue with the steps until the end." She said quietly, if she were here now, in this moment with me, I think I would start crying. She is my best friend and always listens to my outbursts.

"Maybe you're right." I squeezed the bridge of my nose and sighed for the millionth time. I have to calm myself and continue with what I started. "Thanks Sunni."

"Oh, it was nothing. You know I'm always here. Soon I'll make you a visit. Kiseu.” She said and then said goodbye. She would visit me, it cheered me a little.

"Bye." I said goodbye and she hung up the call.

Ok ______, let's continue. I opened the zipper of my bag and pulled it out the paper, I was always with the paper, wherever I went, I always had the paper. I ran with my eyes the lines until I reach the fourth step.

'Fourth step: If you weren't able to complete the third step, then you should ignore him for a while. Visit his friends and if he's with them, just ignore him and he'll apologize, you should forgive him when you see that he actually deserves it.'

It seems that today I have to forgive him or maybe not. Well, I bet he is practicing in TS and it seems that I'll have to see him, although I don't feel like it but I have to be strong. I looked at my phone and open the list of my contacts; I searched the name of Himchan and pressed the green button to call him. Of the entire group, without Youngjae, I'm closer to Himchan, don't ask me why. I don't know but I really like him as a brother and he too, we both have the same tastes in certain things and he talks to me a lot, as he says, I'm his little sister. I could hear the annoying ringing of the call until he answered.

“Yeoboseyo.”

"Hello Himchan, it's me." I said with a low voice.

"Oh little sister, how are you going?" He asked and I sighed, it was already the second time I've heard this question today.

"I'm fine. Can I go visit the boys?" I asked and I heard some voices in the background, after a few minutes he responded.

"Of course. We are in TS." He gave the answer to my question.

"Okay, I see you in a few minutes." I said goodbye and hung up the call. I got up from the bench and looked one last time to the tulips. I guess I was preparing myself mentally that I would see Youngjae after two weeks without seeing him and without talking to him. I walked to TS and could feel the heartbeats of my heart increasing in every step I came closer to TS. My feet stopped in front of the door and a TS guard glanced at me, we exchanged glances, he nodded and let me enter. He knew me, it wasn't the first time I came here. I approached the automatic door and it opened. I greeted the secretary and climbed the wooden stairs that gave access to the several practicing rooms. I went through two rooms and stopped in the third, I could hear the music coming out of there. I put my hand on the doorknob and closed my eyes. Be strong ______. I opened my eyes and opened the door; they all looked at me and Zelo turned off the music. Himchan ran to me and gave me a bear hug.

"Hello" He greeted me and I smiled, I missed them all.

"Hello boys." I greeted them all after Himchan release the hug. My eyes stopped on Youngjae and my smile faded away from my lips. He was in a bad condition. He had some dark circles under his eyes and looked like he was a little thin, all of this happened because I didn't talk to him during these two weeks? I don't want him to destroy his image because of me. Guilt began to corrode my bones; I took a step to get closer to him but then stopped. No, ______, remember what you came here to do. "So how's life?" I asked and a fake smile appeared on my lips.

"It's going well but Youngjae doesn't cooperate lately. We often wonder what's wrong with him but he says nothing." Yongguk said pointing to Youngjae and I tried not to look at him but when I found myself my eyes were on him but he was looking at the floor. Oh Youngjae, I'm so sorry. I cried mentally.

"______, your relationship with Youngjae goes well?" Jongup asked and I said nothing. What would I say? Would I say it was okay? Would I lie? I can’t. Himchan hit me with his elbow in my ribs and I looked at him. He pointed with his chin to Youngjae and I shook my head.

"Guys, how about we go get something to eat?" Himchan asked and I looked at him askance. I know what he's trying to do.

"Sure." Everyone nodded and left me alone with Youngjae. How wonderful, now what? I sat on the floor, away from Youngjae and leaned my head on the glass of the mirror. Youngjae sat down too, and looked at me.

"Please don't look at me." I asked covering my face with my hands.

“Mian.” He said with a faltering voice. He... he was... He was crying? I took my hands from my face and looked at him, I saw something shiny slipping through his cheek and my eyes widened. Omo, he was really crying. It was the first time I saw him in this condition and it was the first time I saw him crying because of me. "Mian ______, I'm so stupid." He sniffled and wiped the tears with the palm of his hand. "I... I know I never told you I loved you too, but I want you to know that I like you... I... I want to stay with you... I... I'm so happy with you ______, I haven't told you these words ‘I love you’ because I want to tell them when I'm absolutely sure of them." He looked at me and I couldn't stand it and started crying too. Oh my God. I covered my face and the tears fall freely from my eyes, I heard some footsteps and seconds later felt the strong arms of Youngjae embracing me. "______ please, wait for me, wait till I tell you I love you, I'm sure that day will come. Please be a little more patient." He asked and I looked at him. He was in a disgrace, his eyes were bright because of the crying and the dark circles under his eyes were worse. I touched with my trembling fingers in his eyes and wiped away his tears.

"Youngjae... Youngjae I apologize for being a despicable person." I sniffled and I covered my face with my hands.

"I also have to apologize. I know I've said a bunch of times but I have to repeat. I'm sorry ______." He removed my hands from my face and twined his fingers with mine. "These days were so painful for me." He sniffed and me too. “I was so afraid of losing you; I didn't eat, barely slept and thought about you every second." He wiped my tears and hugged me tightly, resting his head on the bow of my neck.

"These two weeks for me were also not very good." I blurted. "I felt so hurt that day."

“I know.” He raised his head and my face. "I will not say now that I love you because it would only be to comfort you and I can’t do that. You know how I am." He said and I nodded. "You wait a little bit more for me?" He asked and I nodded again. "Do you forgive me?"

“Yes.” I said, I knew that I would forgive him, he deserved that I forgive him, after all he was crying for me. "Youngjae, you have to eat well and sleep well too." I said, running my fingers through his dark circles, I wanted him to be healthy and smile always.

"Now that I have your forgiveness, for sure I'll eat better and sleep like a rock." He said in a playful tone, and I smiled.

"Good." I said and kissed his fluffy cheek.

"______, starting today, can I call you by a name I have long wanted to call you?" He asked and I nodded curious. “Jagiya.” He whispered the words and my heart began to beat wildly. He smiled and kissed me on the top of the head. "You are my jagiya and always will be. Gomawo for being my yeppeun jagiya.” He whispered in my ear and I hugged him suddenly making us both lay on the floor.

"You're welcome, yeobo." Both blush when I said the last word and we started laughing somewhat intimidated. Ah, Yoo Youngjae, Yoo Youngjae, you fill my heart with your so cute acts and your charming smile.

Fourth step: Successfully complete after two weeks a little hellish but all worth it because he called me Jagiya for the first time.

Done ^^. My heart warms because of your comments.. Thank you ♥