It began innocently, like most things do. Jiyong had finally gotten up the courage to admit to his feelings for the woman he loved the most, after months and months of convincing himself that he wasn't. He’d poured his feeling out as sincere as he could, he told her his heart all the while that he was so so sorry and that he’d never let this happen to her again. That he would cherish and protect her. Because he loved her. She’d scarcely believed him, the many horrible things he’d said to her in the past still fresh in her memory. He’d convinced her though, and they’d embarked on a relationship.
He’d be lying if he said it wasn’t chaotic at times. He often said and did things that hurt her, although he had never done it intentionally. Before today that is.
Jiyong sighed under his breath, running his fingers though his hair. He finally looked up, and realized that his feet had taken him to where she was. He bit his lip. This is the best way to fix this mess he’d made. So he made his way, without a single thought.

There she was, still breath taking as ever. She looks better, the more he sees her. She rose from her seat as soon as she realised he was there. 

"Oppa! I haven't seen you in a while. I was getting worried."

"Yeah.. It's been a while." Jiyong couldn't even look her in the eyes. He knew for sure this would break her heart.

"Oppa.. Jiyongie Oppa.. Is something up? You seem hesitant towards something." Chaerin mumbled, without noticing that she's been biting her fingers again. Old habits  never dies. Jiyong couldn't help but smile.

"You see.. I don't know how to say. The best way I can.."

"Just say it.. All this suspense is making it worse." 

Jiyong looked perplexed."Mianhe.. I'm getting married.. Noona, she's.. She's pregnant. And I have my responsibilities as a man. We can't go on any further."

Chaerin held her breath and passed her hand over her head. This was all too surreal. She couldn't believe. She didn't want to. 

She fought back the tears as hard as she could. It killed her so much, her chest felt heavier as the time passed. Soon her shoulder began shaking and it was harder to breath. "S..stupid. How can I be so delusional. To think my happiness can last longer than a day. Who am I to expect happiness.."

"Chae.. I'm sorry.." This was then when Jiyong slowly broke into tears. He held her hands tightly in his, as if he didn't want to let it go.

Finally, Chaerin heaved a sigh and tossed her purse onto the table, the soft thud of it breaking through the thick air. Jiyong jumped, despair plastered on his handsome features as he continued to wait for the only person he’d ever loved to tell him that she didn’t want him anymore.

“Do you love me?” Chaerin questioned, and Jiyong's head shot up, he shot her a sincere look.

“Yes, Lee Chaerin. God yes I love you. I’ve always loved you. Please, just please.” Jiyong pleaded , and was unashamed of it. Jiyong was completely without shame as he entreated Chaerin to believe his sincerity.
He loved her more than he could ever begin to prove and being separated from her was killing him.

She nodded.Her gaze grew stern as she carefully wiped her tears. She looked into his eyes one last time. She let herself out and numbly made her way out of the building.

Jiyong quickly jolted from his seat and chased after her. Before she could go any further, he pulled her into his grip and locked her in his arms. "Don't leave. Don't let me go like this. I don't want to be left with your expression in my mind"

"Why? Am I not allowed to feel sad for myself. How selfish can you be? I'm hurt. Stop trying to think I'm a robot. I may not be as vulnerable looking as she is.. But remember I get hurt too. She may be pitiful to many, but I'm hurting too.. Why does it have to be like this.." She violently battered his chest, not caring what passerby would think.

______________________________________________
Sandara didn't know why, but she just had the urge to follow him. It's not that she didn't trust his words. She just felt like something bad was bound to happen. 

Jiyong was meant to see that woman today. He's told her but she couldn't stay still. She had to be there, she couldn't bare the thought of him with her. Weird and horrible things start coming to mind.

"Jiyong.. Forgive me." She muttered to herself as she bit the edges of her lips.

She hung her head, and slowly made his way to the cafè, her eyes never leaving her feet. She let herself stroll about and painstakingly paved her way. She continued walking aimlessly through the streets, she didn't care whether she bumped into people or caused trouble. Her mind was way too caught up. 

Her thoughts all became hazy as her vision fixed from across the street. She felt like something had clawed her heart and squished it tight, making it harder to breath.

She finally broke and a ragged cry tore from , and she gave in, her chest heaving with dry sobs. There wasn’t enough air, and Sandara gasped for precious oxygen. Her hand remained in a firm fist, her heart seemingly breaking into pieces like a piece of fragile glass,no hope of repair.

 The sight of her in his arms was enough to take sanity from her. Tear filled eyes and hazy mind, pushed her to run across the street without a care.

Then after that, she'd lost the ability to comprehend certain events. The only thing she could make up were the sounds around her. There was a loud thud which came with a sharp pain in her body. Next thing she knew, she was knocked down unable to feel anything.
 

Her hand trailed off, her hand covered in warm liquid. Panic set in as Sandara tried to figure out where the blood had appeared from. 

There were no other cuts on her face or hands. She looked down to see blood on her leg. Her first thought was her period, but it couldn’t be that.

Her vision grew hazy and she just prayed for Jiyong. 

She needed him, she was so afraid. She took all her might to make out a word. 

"Baby.. My baby.. Please help.."

That was that. The next thing she felt was rain. Just endless raindrop that seemed to just wash the pain away. The droplets of water on her body gave her so much comfort. How ironic, the skies suddenly broke into tears. Seems like she's not the only one in pain. Like something was reminding her that there are different kinds of pain. This one has to be the worst, in her mind.

The sudden uproar from the crowd broke the tension between them. It seemed like there was an accident. 

"Look, a woman seemed to have gotten hit by car!" a lady pointed.

Jiyong's face grew pale as he shot a glance over at the road. She was laying unconscious as blood flowed from her body, slowly washing away with the rain. 

Jiyong felt as if his lungs collapsed from the force of the air leaving his body. The pain caused by the thought of Dara getting hurt again because of him was worse than any physical pain he’d ever experienced. He didn't want her to go through this.

"Noona! Sandara Noona."
He broke off from Chaerin's grip, making his way to her. 

He’d scooped her up and carried her out, whispering all the while that he was so so sorry and that he’d never let this happen to her again. That he would cherish and protect her. Jiyong felt like absolute crap. 

He ran as hard as he could to his car. He felt the weight of his body as his legs grew heavier. His breathing was unsteady as he gently places her into the car seat.

 "Hang on.. Please.. Don't slip.." He wasn't a religious person but he prayed at that moment. If there was a God, then this was the best moment for him to grant prayers. "Please let her be safe."
____________________________________________________

He ran as quickly as he could to the emergency room. Blood seamlessly from her body and she grew paler by the minute.
Deep red blood. It’s all Jiyong could see. His heart pounded heavily. He had no clue of what to do. A wave of sickness dawned over his body.

"Jiyong-ssi.. We have to take the baby out or the mother will die!" The doctor snapped which seemed to bring his attention back to reality. 

"I can't.. I can't" Jiyong sobbed grew louder as he raked his fingers through his drenched hair. 

Dara's consciousness came back. Her body felt heavy and she felt a throbbing pain all over. But, it didn't matter.

 The pain was nothing. Suddenly she clasped her stomach. She grew into a state of panic as her eyes wondered. The blood terrified her, but most of all she was worried. "My baby.. Where's my baby.."

Jiyong face grew expressionless, tears continuously poured on his face. "I don't want the baby.. If it means her life." 
Without second a thought he signed the papers. 

"No.. No.. Don't.. Jiyong please. Don't touch my child. Don't kill my baby.. I know you don't want me.. Please. Not the baby.. This child is the only one who would love me.. My baby." Dara hysterically begged, she latched her grip on her arms as tight as she could. "Please.. Let me keep my child.. I won't bother you anymore"

"No.. Please proceed. I don't want the child.. I only want noona" He quickly turned his back to her. He couldn't bare to see her this way. "I'm so sorry noona.. Forgive me." With shaky hands he signed the papers, with that all the energy escaped his body.

You know those imagines that say that “you lost your baby”? Yes this is a very touchie subject because it happens to women around the world. Despite that easy come and go idea, the baby does not just disappear.

In the beginning of a miscarriage, you will experience cramping and bleeding. This can go several ways; it can stop. The woman's cervix can open up which means the pregnancy can not continue on, and an ineviatable miscariage where all of the pregnancy tissue gets flushed out of her body.

 The hardest part of it all was that she tried so hard to hold on. Though she had very little energy left, Sandara fought. She held her stomach in a tight embrace. It was all over too soon and then darkness took over her.

Details, they all slipped her consciousness. She tried so hard to remember what just happened. She was scared to death. 

Sandara's hand wandered, she felt the breeze coming from the air conditioner. Her eyelids felt heavy to the point where it's almost impossible to open them. 

She had one thing her mind. Her baby.

Her hands clawed into her own skin. It was odd that she felt numb all over. The room reeked of hospital smell, somewhere in between rubbing alcohol and disinfectant. 

With the remaining energy she could muster, Sandara forcefully opened her eyes. 
Sandara cried out to spot Jiyong down beside her. He apologised over and over again. He didn’t hold her back and she tried to fight back as he wrapped her with his embrace.
She was scared, terrified of what he could do. But he was a warm comforting body next to her as she cried. 

She wanted to kill him, but at the same time she wanted him to stay. Her head throbbed with pain, as tears streamed down her cheeks. Silent tears, send her body weak and shaky. Her heart was breaking, and the only comfort she could immediately find was the man sitting next to her. 

Dara allowed him to wrap his body around hers, let him cling to her, his anchor in the storm that was his existence. He prayed to every God he didn’t believe in that she’d always be in a safe place.

Eventually his desperate affections slowed and she pulled back slightly, and Jiyong's embrace tightened around her, a silent plea to stay with him, though he loosened his grip when she winced. 

He felt absolutely hurt and at the same time he felt like a total idiot. 
 
He was sorry. No matter how many times he says it, He's still sorry . That this had to end like this for her. He promised to take that pain away, yet her hurt her worse than ever. 

He felt apologetic, that he's not only her umbrella in this storm, but also her rain.