A/N: This is still the past. Most of the chapters will be the past. That’s because I wanna show what a hard life she had and well……yeah…..enjoy! :D Oh! And one more thing. This is when you live alone….so no aunt…..I know some of you are going “YAY!” LOL!

You woke up and smiled. Today you were going to the dance your school organized with Kris. He had asked you yesterday and you were ecstatic. You smiled as you curled your hair. You were wearing a dress that stopped just above your knees it was a sleeveless dress and was pale pink. It looked incredible on you as it matched your fair skin tone. You applied no make-up at all as you didn’t think you needed it. You wore matching flats as you hated heels. How can girls walk in those things?

You took your clutch bag and as a habit, put your phone and purse in it. The bell rang and you smiled widely. You ran down the stairs smiling all the way. You opened the door. “KRIS!” you hugged the person in front of you without looking. You frowned you knew Kris and this was NOT Kris. You abruptly pulled back to see a very familiar looking guy in a tux. Your frown deepened. Where is Kris?  You thought. The guy was staring at you the whole time. WOW! I dunno why Kris doesn’t treat her right! She is the most beautiful girl I have ever seen!  He thought.

“Hello?” you said waving your hands in front of his face. “Anyone there?” you asked jokingly. You remembered that he was one of Kris’ friends. What was his name…..you almost had it.....yeah! Kai! “Kai? Right? Where is Kris?” the guy frowned. She remembers my name? “Yeah it’s Kai. Kris can’t um…..he can’t uh….he’s… er……sick…..” why does Kris do this to her? Sick my foot I shouldn’t have covered for him and the little he’s doing for tonight, at least he cares about his girlfriend to send me in his place…. Kai thought.

Your heart sank. You almost cried then and there. “He’s with some other girl isn’t he?” you asked dully. Kai’s eyes widened and then his shoulders slumped. “Yeah. I’m sorry….I dunno why he does this when he has such a nice girlfriend. I really don’t know. I guess he’ll regret it when he actually loses you.” Kai looks at you and you smile your sad smile at him. Kai almost fainted at your smile. It was so…..sad. He realised that you used that smile a lot now a days. He wondered what was behind that smile of yours. He couldn’t imagine how sad….how upset, betrayed, disappointed and unloved you felt.

He looked at you. “You know…I admire you….that smile of yours. You always wear it…..I dunno what are the emotions behind it….I dunno how you feel but honestly…I think people should leave you alone…Kris should really start appreciating you….you know one day he’s gonna lose you and then…..well…. he’ll regret every single time he cheated on you…every single time he hurt you…..” tears escaped your eyes. But you smiled. You kept smiling and you said “Thank you Kai but you have one thing wrong….I am NEVER going to leave Kris…..not unless he wants me to. Not unless he says it to my face…..I love him too much.” You cried as Kai stared at you. “Kris you bastard….you don’t deserve her…..” he mumbled as he turned to leave.

“Well now you know the purpose I suppose you don’t want to go with me?” You looked at Kai and shook your head no. “Gomawo.” You said as you closed your front door leaving him on the other side of it. You sighed. You were sad. Very sad. Kris did this always. You made your way up to your room and locked yourself in. you pulled the curtains. You didn’t want anyone to see what you were going to do. Before you could head into the bathroom though, your phone rang. You picked it up without looking at the ID. “Joo Joo?” A voice said. Kris. You hung up. You couldn’t take this. You sat on your bed sobbing. You stripped yourself of your clothing and ignored your ringing phone. You stepped into the bathroom and took out an object from the top shelf on your right. You the hot water in the bathtub. Boiling hot water.

Somehow you knew it would hurt. Cold water makes it numb but hot water? Makes it worse. Logic. Right now you were upset and the only way to get rid of this feeling was pain. You lowered yourself into the tub hissing as the hot water gave slight burns to your body but you adjusted. You leaned your back on the wall and closed your eyes. You raised your hand and slowly brought it down to your right wrist. You dragged the sharp blade all the way across your arm creating one big gash which was furiously bleeding.

You were not satisfied. Yes, it hurt so much but the pain Kris caused you over the years hurt even more. You wanted out. You placed the blade back at the place where you cut before. Then you cut over the already bleeding wound. Going even deeper than first time. Tears of pain rushed out of your eyes but it didn’t stop. You went over the same wound again cutting again and again. You watched as blood slowly mixed with the hot water making it turn a shade of pink. You weren’t satisfied. You didn’t like the colour. So, you cut again and again making the water deep red. You gasped as the pain increased but you still weren’t done.

You took the blade into your right hand. It was almost impossible to move your right hand as it was hurting like hell right now but you made yourself do it. To make the pain in your right hand decrease, you cut your left hand but in small cuts. Not one big cut like your right. In your left, you make small cuts all over the arm. You suddenly dropped the blade horrified with what you did. You sobbed when you looked at the mess you had made out of your hands. Trying to get rid of the blood, you dunked your hands into the deep red hot water and you screamed at the agony it caused. You screamed and screamed but no one came. You sat in your own blood. You fell asleep in your own blood and no one came for you.

Your screams were not answered. This was somehow like your life. You called out but no one ever answered. No one answered but Kris. And now he left too. You dreamt of your worst nightmare Kris leaving you which had come true in real life. You had no one. Yes, you loved Kris but he didn’t love you. You truly had no one. People say I have no one who loves me but they are wrong. This is how it is when no one loves you. Cares about you. Little did you know there WAS someone who heard your screaming. Heard your cries. Someone who always did.

Kai’s P.O.V:

I got Kai’s text. Check up on her plz. I don’t want her to be upset and cry. Plus she is not picking up my calls. I’m worried. I shook my head sadly. You don’t know Kris how many times she has already cried because of you. You were meant to be there for her, support her when she had no one. And when this has come true, when she really has no one, Kris, you are leaving her alone……

I drove over to her place again wanting to make sure she was alright when I heard screaming. I panicked. What was going on in there? I banged on the door just as the screaming stopped abruptly. I grew even more panicked. Why did she stop screaming. “Park Jooyin!” I called Kri who was conveniently drunk. Take note of the sarcasm in the previous sentence. “Hulla?” Kris slurred. “KRIS! What the heck is wrong with Jooyin? Why was she screaming?” “She’ll be alight! Don’t worry!” “What the hell is wrong with you? You were the one asked me to check up on her!” I sighed. Kris like this was as good as dead. “Where are the keys to her door?” “Oh them? Under the mat!” he said and I hung up. I took the keys out and unlocked the door and ran upstairs.

I pushed her door open but it didn’t budge. I took a step back and kicked it open. The door busted open and I saw her phone on the bed and her clothes in a pile around her bed. My eyes trailed to the bathroom. I sighed. I really didn’t want to do this but something could have gone wrong with her. I took a breath and opened the bathroom. The sight in there made me freeze. Literally. I stood there. I stood there as Jooyin’s lifeless looking body lying in the bath tub. My eyes widened when I saw the blade next to the tub on the floor.

Suddenly, I ran over to her and checked if she was alive. She was. I called the ambulance. Then I saw the cuts on her hands and nearly cried. The water was hot. I couldn’t imagine how much it hurt. On her right wrist there was one long cut. It looked like she had gone over it multiple times. I flinched when I also saw her left arm. This time, I cried. I cried till the ambulance came. I didn’t know her that well but what I did know was that she deserved better. WAY better than all this. I suddenly felt guilty and angry at the same time. Guilty at myself for my inability to do nothing and angry at Kris.

Kris’ girlfriend was lying half dead in her bath tub surrounded in her own blood and he was drunk doing on of his s? At that moment I absolutely HATED my best friend. I called to tell Kris about this and this is what he had to say “She’ll be fine! Anyways, it’s not like she’s dying right. I’ll visit her tomorrow maybe.” I sighed. Park Jooyin…...for your sake I wish…..Kris comes to his senses before he hurts you any more than he already has…..                      

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Author's Note:

Hey guys! So, well I CAN be pretty depressing when I want to! But straight to the point- what do you think? of this chapter of course? and btw THANK YOU there was someone else who voted for me! Thank you thank you thank you! And the sweet subscribers and readers. I LOVE reading your comments! Alas, I know I'm making the poor girl's life really hard but well this is what it's about. another imp. note is that this is NOT how she ends up in hospital. this is one of the many hospital trips she had to have because of her well.....problems...sometimes bullying...sometimes this.....I know it's confusing but I'll try to explain:

The present is when Kris is with her in the hospital. Ok? Now how she got there? I told you in last to last chap. when she goes into the lake and faints or rather falls asleep. and she's dead but the ambulance people manage to make her hert beat just barely? Well that's the REAL reason she's there. this chapter is one of the minor things and memories in her life. you know when your life flashes in fron tof your eyes when you are about to die? Well, it's orta the same thing. except there hardly anything save Kris which is a good memory.

Anyways, Enjoy! COMMENT & SUBSCRIBE!!!!! enjoy the read!:D