I ended up staying over that night…

“I’m going home…” I told Jaejoong as I glanced at the wall clock.

We were sitting across each other, his hand holding mine. Even with the words I just said, neither of us made a move to leave. We just sat there looking at each other.

I cut off the eye contact and stood up, but his hand never released mine. He looked up at me.

“Stay… “ was all he said.

Collecting my plate, I shook my head.

I had work, so does he, and there is no way we’re going to get caught leaving his condo early in the morning.

I took my hand off his hold and brought our plates to the sink.

“Why not?” he asks as he followed me.

“Because…” I opened my mouth to explain but was quickly interrupted when I felt his presence behind me.

He wrapped his arms around me and laid his chin on my shoulder, “there’s nothing you can say that will convince me why you CAN’T stay.”

I continued to wash the dishes, face flushed, heart beating fast.

Jaejoong tightened his hold on me and laid his forehead on the back of my head.

I wiped my hands on the hand towel then turned around.

My gaze met his empty stare. He wasn’t looking at me, his head was down.

For the first time, I didn’t know what to make out of his look. He seems troubled and tired. I pulled his chin for his eyes to meet mine, “Jaejoong-ie are you okay?”

That melancholic stare he had a moment ago, quickly disappeared as his mouth formed a smile.

“Don’t hide anything from me…” I mumbled.

He took his arms off my waist and held my face between his hands, “Stay.”

I shook my head and he let out a chuckle.

Jaejoong leveled his eyes with mine, “Please?” he asked once more.

This time, his eyes giving off that feel again.

I wanted to say no, I wanted to explain why, but there was something restricting me to do so. I let my body take over and slowly nodded to his request.

He grinned and that painful look in his eyes disappeared again.

That silly smile on his face leveled down to a soft one. His loving stare that sends butterflies in my tummy, returned.

“I love you.” Jaejoong whispered.

Even if we’ve been together for quite a while, it’s the first time he’s ever said this.

He tucked my hair behind my ears and laid a soft peck on my lips.

My hands fell on his shoulder and I leaned it to steal a kiss.

"I love you." I breathed as I moved back.

"Good night Jaejoong." I smiled as I moved his bangs from his face.

He was already asleep, or so I thought, when he clasped his arms around me and pulled me closer towards him.

I felt his lips on my forehead and then heard a low, "Goodnight jagi."

Inhaling his scent, I thought, "I can get used to this."

Then I open my eyes.

I was wrapped up in foreign sheets, holding on to that black jacket Jaejoong gave me on our first date.

This is the 3^rd night that I’ve dreamt of him… of how we were… of the words I might never hear again.

I sat up and my eyes wandered to the rising sun.

Everything wasn’t suppose to remain in my memory.

his eyes

his smile

his scent

his voice

his physique

The way he made me feel

his straightforward attitude

The way he cares

The way he makes the wrong things sound right

The way his words make me forget everything else

his kiss

his hold

him.

Yet pieces of him never seem to leave my unconscious.

I zipped up the jacket and pulled the hood over my head.

We got rocky and I started to not see him. No trace of him. No phone call, no text message, no note, when he was out, he’s out. Schedules, he says, but… I stopped believing him.

It got so bad that I started to think that I was just imagining everything we did, everything we went through, everything we were.

So we ended things.

Or... I thought we did.

Stepping out of the suite, I met a familiar figure leaving the room across mine.

“Hey…” Jaejoong’s husky voice echoed in the distance we share, "I miss you"

It’s been months since I last heard that voice and it hurt. I swore to myself never to be with him again.

But...

He looks and smiles at me.

And I fall in love all over again. 

[END]

Well that's that.

That's really how it's meant to end.

Yes, I'm sorry m(_ _)m

I'm sorry...

But please leave your thoughts on the comments section.

Really I apologize if it wasn't cutesy and sweet as it... probably implied,

though I warn you, I never intended that, it was meant

to be longing and melancholic from the beginning.

I failed, didn't I?

xD

Thank you for reading, commenting and subscribing :)