The days passed by quickly, Hyukjae went to work and Donghae went to the hospital. Every day he sat with Bae-ri and talked. They talked about life, work, friends, family, health and even the weather. Over time, Donghae could see that Bae-ri was getting better. There was colour back in her cheeks and she looked less and less tired. It made Donghae feel special to think that maybe he had some small part in her recovery.

Almost a week had passed since his first visit and he had become quite good friends with her. She had said that her dad was very happy with him, which at least made him feel better about his job. This time when he walked into the hospital Donghae saw his doctor passing in the hall.

“Ah Donghae, how is your hand going?” He asked

“I think it is doing much better sir.” Donghae replied, “I haven’t been using it at all, and the pain has certainly subsided a lot.”

“That is good to hear then. Why don’t you stop by office on your way out and we’ll take a proper look at it.”

 “Ok sir, I will. Thank you.” And with that Donghae parted ways with his Doctor, and headed upstairs to see his friend.

_____

“Bae-ri! Guess what!” Donghae said excitedly as he opened the door.

Donghae was pulled up short when he entered the room to find the Director sitting by her bed.

“Sorry sir, I didn’t know you were here.”

“That’s ok Donghae, continue with what you were saying.” The director said when Donghae turned away looking embarrassed. 

Donghae turned to Bae-ri, and went around to the other side of her bed. With an encouraging smile he spoke again.

“The doctor thinks my hand is doing much better! I have to see him on my way out, but I hope he tells me I can finally take my brace off!”

Bae-ri smiled, “That’s great Donghae, I’m really happy!”

“So you can finally return to work?” the Director said coolly from across the room.

“Umm, I don’t know yet. But I hope so!” Donghae eagerly replied.

“Well I hope so too, we all miss having you set.”

Although the Director’s words were happy and pleasant, Donghae sensed that there was something more to his words, like he was tired of waiting for him. I guess all of my second chances are up.  Donghae thought.

Today’s chat with Bae-ri was almost just like any other, except for the fact that he noticed the Director watching like a hawk constantly. He tried to ignore it as best as possible for Bae-ri’s sake.

They had been talking about Patches’ latest escapades, which involved escaping out the front door and taking off down the stairs of Donghae’s apartment building, when the Director asked to speak to Donghae outside.

“Excuse me darling,” He said as he addressed Bae-ri, “But may I borrow Donghae for a minute? I just want to have a quick chat to him outside.”  

Bae-ri looked just as confused as Donghae felt, and he was sure he looked it too, but he obliged and left the room behind Bae-ri’s father.

Once outside Donghae turned to his boss.

“Sir?”

“Donghae, this may be a bit personal, and I’m sorry to intrude but do you… are you currently… Ah. How do I say it…?” He paused and looked inwardly pensive for a moment.

“It’s fine sir, just ask what you want to ask, I won’t mind.”

“Ok then, Donghae.” He inhaled deeply before continuing. “Do you have a girlfriend?”

Donghae was stunned. He just stood there with his eyes wide. He didn’t know how to answer that question because technically, no; he didn’t have a girlfriend. But would the director understand? What if he didn’t understand? What if he hated him? Worse what if Donghae lost his job!

On the other hand, if he said yes, would Hyukjae be offended? Could he lie to his boss and what if the truth came out later? Wouldn’t the repercussions be far worse for him then?

The older man spoke again, “Ah I’m sorry Donghae, that must have been to forward.”

The Director looked broken for a moment. “It’s just that I think that you would be a perfect match for Bae-ri, and she really needs someone like you in her life. Ever since you started to visit she has become so much brighter and I even think she is getting better because of you.”

Donghae suddenly felt guilty for a moment. He could see the Director’s good intentions as a father but he knew he had to be true to himself.

Shakily Donghae spoke, “No, sir I don’t have a girlfriend…”

His boss looked up with a spark of hope in his eyes, and before Donghae could continue he interrupted.

“Would you consider my daughter then…?  Please.” He almost begged.

Donghae again fell silent. There was a huge weight bearing on his heart. It was no longer just about him. Now he had Bae-ri to think of. He couldn’t stand to break such a sweet girl’s heart and what if Donghae’s rejection made her condition worse?

So Donghae said the only thing he could think of and hoped it would save him.

“Time... Please give me some time to think it over.”  He then swallowed nervously, not meeting the man’s eyes.

The Director thought and then nodded slowly.

“Of course Donghae, I’m sorry to put you in this position.” 

_____

The two men entered the room as normally as possible, however the atmosphere was strained.

The young girl in the bed looked between the two men first with confusion, then with a frown.

“I hope you didn’t say anything to offend Donghae father.” She said testily.

“Ah, no it’s nothing like that!” Donghae quickly interjected “We were just talking about when I could go back to work. That’s all.”

The director just nodded in response.

Bae-ri laid back in her bed, she seemed suspicious but she accepted Donghae’s reason all the same.

Donghae could only stay another few minutes, Hyukjae would be finishing work soon, and he didn’t like being kept waiting.

“Bae-ri I have to go now, I have to see the doctor about my hand. And depending on how things go, I might start work again, so I don’t know when I will be back.”

The girl looked crushed, it was clear that she truly liked Donghae’s company. This is what Donghae feared most.

“But I’ll definitely be back ok?” Donghae managed a smile.

She nodded “Ok, I’ll see you then.”

Donghae shook his boss’s hand before hurrying out the door. He wanted that place behind him as soon as possible.

_____

When he reached his doctor’s office his head was a swirling whirlpool of emotions and thoughts. How could Director do this to me? What kind of position am I in here? Could I lose my job if I reject her?

He shook his head before knocking on the door. One problem at a time. He thought to himself.

“Donghae come in” the be-speckled man greeted him.

Once Donghae had sat down in the chair opposite the desk, the man continued. “Let’s take a look at that hand then shall we.”

The doctor removed the brace with care. Then he pulled a wet wipe from his desk draw and wiped over Donghae’s hand.

“It’s looking good. The bruising on the skin has significantly reduced…” He said gesturing to the patch of skin that was now a slightly off yellow colour, instead of black, blue and purple.

“We should have it scanned to investigate how your bones are doing.”

All Donghae could manage was a vacant bob of his head. The doctor then rose from his chair and headed out the door.

“Follow me then, and we’ll go down to the MRI.”

Donghae followed the man through the halls, into an elevator and down in to the treatment ward.

20 minutes later he was standing nervously outside the MRI room waiting for the Doctor to bring him his results.

After a moment the Doctor entered the hallway and approached Donghae.

“Well it seems that the bruising of your knuckles has also dramatically lessened.  However it is not completely healed.” He said cautiously.

“What does that mean for me?” Donghae asked

“Well it means that you don’t have to wear the brace any longer if you don’t want to, but you still have to be careful with it for a little while longer. Otherwise you should almost be able to use it as normal, with only minimal pain.”

Donghae let out a sigh of relief and looked at his hand. He could probably make do without the brace. And to be honest he was kind of sick of being babied by Hyukjae.

Donghae smiled and thanked the doctor before leaving. He thought that maybe he should call his Director to let him know that he could go back to work, but he wasn’t ready to face him yet. Donghae didn’t really think he would ever be ready.

____

When he reached the ground floor of the hospital Donghae pulled out his phone and called Hyukjae to come and get him.

“Hello?”

“Hey, I’m done here can you please come and pick me up.” Donghae replied wearily.

“Sure. I’ll be there soon. Is everything ok?” Hyukjae’s concern echoed across the phone.

“Yeah, I’m just tired that’s all.”

“If you say so…” Hyukjae said before hanging up.

Donghae sat down on the bench near the carpark to wait. Once again he returned to the question “Would you consider my daughter then…?”  How could he possibly consider dating Bae-ri when he was already in a relationship with Hyukjae? That was completely out of the question, but how would the director take it if he told him? Would he be hurt, or would he get angry?

I wonder if Bae-ri knew what her father has asked? Donghae pondered. He had to try and find a way out of this where no-one got hurt, including him.

The honk of a car horn jolted him from his thoughts. Hyukjae had pulled up in front of him and was waving at him to hurry up.

“What’s up with you?” Hyukjae asked when Donghae climbed into the car. “You look like your cat just died.” Worry painted over his face. “And if he did, why have you not told me?” He added as an afterthought.

Donghae let out a snort of air. Patches’ dying would be the only thing that could make him feel any worse.

 “No, Hyuk Patches is not dead. I hope. I’m just feeling very tired today.” He managed a weak smile.

Hyukjae didn’t look convinced, but thankfully he decided not to press the matter.

“Hey, your brace is off. That’s good right?”

Relieved for the change of subject Donghae nodded, “Yeah it is. The doctor said that although it is not healed completely I don’t have to wear the brace any longer if I don’t want to.”

Hyukjae was quiet for a moment before asking “… Does that mean we can do stuff?”

“I suppose,” Donghae replied absentmindedly, he wasn’t really in the mood for Hyukjae’s teasing today.

“You don’t sound too enthusiastic about that.” Hyukjae said sounding slightly disappointed.

“I’m sorry Hyuk, I’m just not in the mood today.” Donghae answered apologetically. 

They drove the rest of the way home in silence each lost in their own thoughts.

_____

Patches welcomed them as per usual. Donghae was secretly pleased that he didn’t come home to find Patches dead after his earlier conversation.

Picking up the small cat he his back with his now non-braced hand. Although his hand was still sore and a bit stiff from having the brace on for so long, it was good to be able to use it like normal.

Patches purred and leaned into Donghae’s hand. Donghae smiled. So oblivious He thought. That’s one thing Donghae loved about animals, no matter what a person may be going through, they would always be there offering their unconditional love and trust.

He cuddled his cat close, hoping the soft warm fur would absorb all the troubles from his heart.

“You’re going to suffocate him if you keep that up.” Hyukjae quipped.

Donghae scowled half-heartedly in Hyukjae’s direction and relinquished his hold on his little friend.

“I’m just glad he isn’t dead.” Donghae sighed, he wasn’t even kidding after the day that he had.

“So you could kill him when you got home?” Hyukjae smiled.

“Ergh, shut up Hyukjae.” Donghae said defeated, as he collapsed on to the lounge. 

“Ok, I’ll stop.” Hyukjae said cautiously, sensing something was wrong with his boyfriend.

He crossed over to the lounge where Donghae was sprawled and lifted his head so he could sit down, before returning Donghae’s head to his lap.

“What is the matter Donghae? And you can’t just say you are tired. Something’s wrong and I know it.”  Hyukjae said quietly as he the younger’s hair.

When Donghae said nothing Hyukjae tried again.

“Hae, please? I want to help you.”

“I…” Donghae whispered after a moment.

“mmm” Hyukjae encouraged. “You what?”

“I…I just feel lost, I don’t know what to do.”

Hyukjae continued to the young man’s, trying to coax him into speaking.

“What don’t you know what to do… about?”

Donghae was quiet again.

“If I tell you will you promise not to be angry with me?” He asked anxiously

“Of course Hae. Now what is it?”

Donghae sat up and looked at Hyukjae.

“Well today, when I was visiting Bae-ri, my Director was there.” He began. “And he wanted to speak to me in private, and I thought would be about work, but I was wrong.”

Concerned now, Hyukjae takes hold of Donghae’s good hand. “What did he want to talk to you about then?”

Donghae looked terrified for a moment, worried about how Hyukjae would react, but he decided he couldn’t stop now.

Slowly he said “He asked me if I had a girlfriend…”

Hyukjae’s eye’s narrowed slightly. “Why, what did you say?”

“I told him no, I didn’t have a girlfriend…”

Relief washed over Hyukjae’s face, but Donghae wasn’t finished.

“He then asked me if I would consider going out with Bae-ri instead…”

“What about me?” Hyukjae said slowly, making sure he hadn’t missed anything.

When Donghae remained silent Hyukjae clued on.

“You didn’t tell him about me, did you…?” Hyukjae was angrier now. He slowly released his grip on the younger’s hand as reality set in.

The fear returned to Donghae’s eyes as he shook his head slightly. He could see that Hyukjae was upset, and he had every right to be.

“I was afraid! What if he disapproved of my relationship? He’s not just some guy! He is my boss!” Donghae blurted out hurriedly, trying to form some sort of argument to reason with Hyukjae’s pain.

“I didn’t want to offend him, in case I lost my job…” Donghae finished weakly.  

“So what you are saying is; that you value the opinion of your boss over the validity of your relationship with me.” Hyukjae stated harshly.

“That’s not it…!” Donghae went to protest, but what Hyukjae had said was exactly what it appeared to be.

Donghae hadn’t denied his relationship with Hyukjae, but he hadn’t admitted to it either. And by not admitting to it, he had given the director the wrong impression and he had essentially omitted Hyukjae from his personal life.

Donghae could feel tears starting to well up in his eyes, if he wasn’t hopeless and lost before, he certainly was now.

“Hyuk, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for it to be like this.” Donghae’s tears started to roll down his cheeks.

Hyukjae’s face was grim and his eyes were sad, quietly he said

“I think I better go. Call me when you think you are ready to be a part of this relationship. Unless you are already in one with Bae-ri, in which case never mind. I guess I was never that important to you anyway.”

“No! Hyukjae wait… please don’t go.” Donghae pleaded, but Hyukjae had already picked up his keys and was heading to the front door.

When the door slammed behind him, Donghae’s tears flowed freely. Hyukjae was angry and hurt, as only he should be, but now Donghae was all alone when he needed the other man more than ever.

Donghae collapsed on the lounge once more, his eyes’ were stinging from crying, but it was nothing compared to the ache in his chest.

_____

Down in his car, a lone tear rolled down Hyukjae’s cheek.

Hyukjae’s head was spinning, he’d never felt so betrayed in his entire life. The one person he cared for and trusted above all others had denied him and left him heartbroken.

Donghae failed to acknowledge our relationship. What does that mean? Is he afraid to be with me? Or is he ashamed of me?

Meanwhile, somewhere in the back of his mind, something was telling Hyukjae that maybe he had overreacted.

Donghae had seemed genuine when he said that he was afraid. Maybe he did want to reveal our relationship, but he was held back… Hyukjae thought for a moment. A pang of guilt hit him like a bolt of lightning. But what was done, was done. There was no going back now, at least not for tonight.

Hyukjae decided that he would forgive Donghae, but not just yet. He was entitled to his pain, and he was going to make sure Donghae knew it first. He’d give him some time, maybe they needed some time apart for a bit anyway.

If he hasn’t called in three days I’ll go and see him. He thought as he started the car.

Even though he was angry Hyukjae couldn’t help but think about Donghae; all alone, confused and vulnerable. He looked up at the apartment complex one last time as he debated about going back up and consoling his younger partner…

Instead Hyukjae drove home, wishing the ache in his chest would go away. 

________

HI GUYS! I'M BACK ONLINE! 

So i hope this is ok. I really wanted to draw emotion out my characters but i haven't had practice so i don't really know if it worked...

comments would be appreciated! <3