Love is so short, forgetting so long.

Waiting. It’s not like it’s a bad thing, and Chanyeol spent almost half of his life doing such. He believed everything has a purpose. Some of it even established, some even predetermined. He called it destiny, and he’s a pretty determined believer.

So he spent most of his time on the subway, waiting for the perfect person to arrive. He said he can feel it. That he’d meet the one in the subway train station near his apartment.

“Maybe you’re destined to wait on the subway for the rest of your life.” Kris told him one day, and he just rolled his eyes on the elder. Maybe he was, but he didn’t let anything Kris said set his mind on that.

He’s an adult now, and he knew what he wanted, what made him happy, and he’s willing to wait for it.

Waiting was not a bad thing, but waiting for someone when you have someone else waiting for you, Kris talked him about that.

“Baekhyun is a nice catch.” Kris went out of his character when he said that, and he appreciated it a lot. “Are you sure with this destiny thing you’re so obsessed about, and are you sure you’re not missing out on the world during those secluded hours of mopping in the subway?”

“I know what you mean, I know what I’ve got and I don’t need to lose anything before I acknowledge that. Baekhyun and I, we’re just friends; maybe he thinks we’re a little more than that, but he’s sweet to all his friends and even to you, I should get jealous.” Chanyeol smirked at him and got one in return.

“You met in the subway.” That’s one thing Kris won’t let him live down.

“I’m pretty sure I’m not destined with everyone I meet in the subway.” Chanyeol sighed, and grabbed a coat from the back of the door.

“You’re okay with waiting, but you’re not fine with what your destiny gave you aren’t you?” That’s the last thing he heard before muttering I’m going out.

Half of his life he spent waiting. Half of his life he spent getting his dad to acknowledge him, begging for a little attention, wishing for just a bit of affection, not from his father’s personal secretary, or the excuses his nanny made up before he went to sleep.

He spent his childhood pushing himself towards people who doesn’t want him, and he grew up wanting to guard his heart out of people’s easy reach.

He sat on his usual bench in the subway, earphones stuck in his hears and a book in his hands. He had his eye on the book but his sight is somewhere else, observing people without really looking at them. He had earphones in his ears but he can hear everyone perfectly well, listening to occasional conversations as people pass by.

Waiting for someone. For anyone.

If someone asked him, he would say I’ve been waiting for someone all my life. And he’d be proud, because he could say he waited, and patiently sat there with a book he’s read more than twice all over.

When he sees the person he’s looking for, he’d feel it right away, and he wished that person would feel it too. They’d look into each other’s eyes and smile. And he’d tell that person that he’s always been there.

“I’ve been looking for you.” Someone called in front of him and wasn’t too surprised to see Baekhyun hovering and peaking over his book.

Same old smile etched on his face that instantly brought a smile on Chanyeol's own.

“You dyed your hair.” He said as a greeting, finding it just right to bring it up because Baekhyun looked amazing in it, and the faint blush was evident on his cheeks as he touched his hair unconsciously.

“I just thought it needs a little color. I—“ He stuttered, and Chanyeol laughed.

“It looks amazing on you.” He said, smiling up at him and pulling his earphones out.

Baekhyun sat beside him, and Chanyeol listened as he told him about his day and why he’s there.

He smiled when Chaneyol’s sight turned faraway, seeming like he’s listening but Baekhyun knew better. But he kept on talking and talking, keeping Chanyeol company and wishing he’s not interrupting him on his favorite leisure time.

Maybe Kris was right. That maybe he’s been running away from his own destiny instead of working with it. His eyes landed on Baekhyun’s bright eyes, and indeed he knew what he could have had, if only he’d given it a chance. It’s a bit different, but also feels the same. That Chanyeol once thought Baekhyun was the one, but he felt that it’s just not quite right.

They’ve been friends, and even closer.

Baekhyun came over one time when Chanyeol was bedridden, burning with fever and stuck with an ever complaining Kris while trying to feed him a takeout soup. He’d taken care of him and sang him a song as he slept. He’d been there the next day when Chanyeol woke up.

And he’s still there beside him as he noticed that Baekhyun stopped talking and just settled into smiling at him as he drifted off of his mind while he stared.

“I’m sorry.” Chanyeol muttered, feeling embarrassed though it’s not the first time he spaced out on him.

“It’s okay.” Baekhyun said giggling and Chanyeol watched as his eyes curved, still bright and shining. “I know you tend to do that, a lot.”

“Uhm, not really. I was just talking to Kris a while ago, and his words got me thinking. Not that I’d given everything he said a thought before. It just got me thinking, you know.” He rambled, and he once again laughed at him. “What do you think of destiny?” He said quickly, not really believing he’s having a talk about that, especially with Baekhyun.

Baekhyun smiled before answering him, and it’s not a smile that says he’s laughing at him for his questions. “It’s as simple as tossing a coin.” He said and smiled more before continuing. “It’s not something that gives you what you want, or what you need, or what you think is meant for you. It’s something that helps you choose what you value more of the choices given and laid out in front of you. Just like when you toss a coin. You unconsciously know what you’re wishing for as you watch the coin flip through the air.” He said, and excused himself for a bit as his phone rang.

Destiny, is just as simple as tossing a coin.

He laughed at himself and got a few looks from some passerby as he stuffed his book and earphones in his bag.

Maybe destiny has predetermined future for him, for everyone, but doesn’t leave us without choices. In the end it’s still us who decides what we want, in the end it’s still us who choose what’s destined for us.

Baekhyun returned with a smile no less than what he wore before he left and ushered Chanyeol to his feet. “Do you want to go with me and meet a friend?” He started casually and seeing as he’s already walking with him, he couldn’t find the heart to say no.

“As long as your friend doesn’t kill us both then I’m okay with everything.” Chanyeol told him and stopped by the edge of the platform when a train halted in front of them.

A lot of people filed out of the cubicle while their spots are filled with an equally large number of people filing in. He saw Baekhyun’s searching eyes, jumping from one person to another as they moved out.

“Kyungsoo-yah!” He shouted when the people going out of the train thinned out, still the person he’s looking for is out of sight.

Then Chanyeol caught an eye on someone rushing towards the exit, with a huge bag and another luggage in tow. He heard a squeak from the boy and another squeak from beside him as Baekhyun saw him, shouting at the guy to move fast or the door will close on him before he could even move out.

The speakers made a sound and Chanyeol was quick to pull the guy out, reaching for his free hand and dragged him out just before the door closed, nearly hitting his luggage.

“Are you okay?” He heard himself ask, and waited as the guy grasping his sides with shaky hands looked up.

“I thought I was going to die.” The stranger said and collapsed back on Chanyeol’s chest and still not letting him go. Chanyeol was speechless, given with a complete stranger clutching at his sides and buried in his chest.

Baekhyun’s giggles suddenly exploded and Chanyeol felt his cheeks flushed as the guy pulled back abruptly from him with an equally flushed cheeks.

“I thought you fell asleep in there.” Baekhyun said, hugging the boy as to let the embarrassing atmosphere melt.

“I actually did, and almost missed my stop.” The boy said and Chanyeol watched his pale puffy cheeks as he smiled at Baekhyun.

“I want you to meet someone.” Baekhyun said, and two pairs of brown eyes turned to him. “This is my friend, Chanyeol. And Chanyeol, this is Kyungsoo. He was my classmate in high school and he’s moving in one of our apartments.”

Chanyeol watched as Kyungsoo bit his lip, wiping his right hand not so subtly at the back of his pants before offering it to him. And he took it with a smile.

“Sorry for a while ago. And thank you. I’m Do Kyungsoo, I hope our first meeting doesn’t affect our future friendship.” He said before beaming a very bright smile.

“I was glad to be of help, I'm Park Chanyeol.” He said, and barely remembered to say his name as he grasped at the small hand offered in front of him.

He could say that the smile is contagious, because he found himself smiling back, maybe not as bright, but still smiling like he never did before. His own smile told him he doesn't need to be back in the subway waiting for nothing because maybe, just maybe, he's found what he's been looking for.

He stared at the other man, and his smile is enough to light up even the darkest corners of humanity.

And beside Kyungsoo, Baekhyun was looking at him with a different kind of smile.

"Once you've made your choice, the coin in your hands will be worthless, even if you flipped it, even if the result was tails, but you knew deep in your heart that you wanted heads. That's where destiny is like toss coin." Baekhyun told him, and he can see Kyungsoo's questioning eyes darting in between them.

His eyes landed on Kyungsoo's face, smiling at him and telling him it's a personal joke. And in his peripherals he can see Baekhyun's equally bright smile he pretended not to see.

How can a smile so bright, tell him just how much he’d be missing, and still not regret it?

Because if you know you've got what you wanted, why is it that you are still searching?