“You built your walls so high, but I’m gonna try…”

Day 3

27 days left

Seohyun woke up the next morning. She had not noticed that she cried herself to sleep last night. She walked out of her room and found the house empty. She walked around and it was only then that she took in the new atmosphere that the house had since Kyuhyun had cleaned it yesterday. It felt less lonely with the dash of sunshine already coming in from the previously boarded windows. She ambled to the dining area and a saw a folded note on the center of the wooden round table.

Seohyun picked up the white sheet of paper and unfolded it, revealing the letter that Kyuhyun wrote the day before. She settled herself on the nearest chair and began reading the letter.

It said:

Dear Seohyun,

First of all, I wanted to apologize for being rude last time. It’s my fault that I have invaded your privacy and I deeply and sincerely apologize for it. Nevertheless, all that was done was already done.

Anyway, I just wanted to say this to you. If only your sisters have the same chance as me in the past. I am sure they would want to be in my position too. They would surely desire to extend their time with you even for just a little longer.

The only consolation that they wanted is to see their loved ones smiling. When they see them hurting, they will be hurting as well. Just take it from me.

Life can be unfair and is full of disappointments but the most important thing is that we learn to live through these and still stand up at the end and hope for the better future.

Pardon me if it seems like I’m meddling with how you wanted to live your life but I just can’t let someone who’s torn to just pass me by.

I just left for a while to give you space to think about this, Seohyun. I hope you think about this thoroughly.

              --Kyuhyun

Seohyun closed the letter and placed it back to where it was on the table. Perhaps Kyuhyun had a point. No, he really had a point. All this time, she has wasted her life living and mulling over the past, totally ignoring what the present has to offer. When Jinwoon left her in the aisle, her whole world crumbled down and she lost vision of any specks of hope there was. Fear, distrust, and insecurities ruled her whole being. Since then, she enclosed herself in isolation, away from the world that betrayed her. Now, maybe the time has already come for her to burn her walls down and open herself to the world outside.

She walked back to the room and stared at her reflection on the mirror. Her fingers traced the contours of her face as she examined every detail of it. What has become of her? She noticed her disheveled hair, the dark circles under her eyes, her pale complexion, and the lifeless expression on her face. Seriously, what has become of her? This wasn’t the Seohyun that her sisters wanted to see.

“This isn’t me.” Seohyun mumbled in front of the mirror. “This is not what I wanted to be.”

‘”Seohyun,” she told herself, “let’s begin again.”

-------------------

Kyuhyun went to Victoria’s residence that day. He approached the tall iron gate and rang the door bell. A maid appeared and went to him.

“Excuse me, Sir. How may I help you?” the maid asked him and just as the rule said, she did not recognize him.

“Can I ask if Victoria is there?” Kyuhyun asked and the maid eyed him suspiciously. She had spent many years of service with the Song family and she could confidently attest that she knew all of the acquaintances and friends of the entire Song family. Now, there’s this guy whom she just met now and he’s already addressing Miss Victoria on the first name basis.

“Excuse me, but in any case, how are you related to Miss Victoria?” the maid interrogated.

“I’m her college friend.” Kyuhyun replied.

“Sorry, but Miss Victoria just left for a vacation with Mr. Zhou Mi.” The maid answered.

“Since when? Just now?”

The maid replied with a nod. “In fact they just left, just a little while ago. If you have no more business, then I ‘ll be back inside.” With that, the maid left.

“I did not catch them.” Kyuhyun muttered disappointedly.

--------------------

Meanwhile, in Zhou Mi’s private residence villa in Chungnam, Victoria kept herself inside the guest room the entire morning. She refused to eat, to go out, and everything that Zhou Mi offered. There was not so much difference since he brought her in this vacation house. She was the same disheartened Victoria and she seemed to be getting tougher to deal with now.

“Vic,” Zhou Mi called as he knocked on the door. “Zhou Mi here, can I come in?”

There was no response.

He tried knocking and calling again but there was still no answer. Zhoumi eventually decided to go inside. He entered the room and he saw Victoria sitting by the window sill, staring blankly at the space in front of her. Next to her was the table on which the food lay untouched.

“You did not eat.” Zhou Mi commented, looking at the tray full of food on the table.

“I don’t want to eat,” said Victoria. Zhou Mi picked up a spoon and scooped some soup for her. “You have to eat. Come, have some.”

“I don’t want to.”

“Just little bit, come on,” Zhou Mi tried to feed Victoria but the latter turned her face away.

“I said I don’t want to eat!” Victoria raised her tone and roughly pushed Zhou Mi’s hand away. “I bet you’re smart enough to understand that! Do you want me to repeat that again?”     

“There’s really nothing that I can do to appease you, right?” Zhou Mi said and uneasy silence ensued. The tinkling of the metal utensil rang out loud in the midst of the silence between the two individuals. The tension slowly built up as they stared in each other’s eyes.

“I thought everything will change once I bring you here.” Zhou Mi said, breaking the silence.

“Change? What will change? Nothing will ever change. Kyuhyun is still dead. Can I not grieve?” Victoria replied.

“Kyuhyun? Kyuhyun again?!” Zhou Mi stood up and the intense emotions inside him suddenly exploded all at once. These were the feelings that he tried best to control for a long time. Zhou Mi stood up and paced around the room “Kyuhyun, Kyuhyun, Kyuhyun; that was all that you talked about. What can I do to erase him out of your mind?” He approached Victoria and cupped her face. He stared at her face with longing. “What can I do to claim you back?”

“Claim me? Zhou Mi, don’t make me laugh. You never claimed me as yourself in the first place, Zhou Mi!” Victoria yelled. Her lips quivered as she muttered her next words. “Although I wished you had. So what are you going to claim now?” Victoria answered as her eyes started to brim with tears. Zhou Mi stepped back and settled at the edge of the bed. The realization of his past mistake had dawned upon him again.

“You have no idea how much I wanted to scream to the whole world how much I love you but you always wanted to keep it a secret.” Victoria continued. The memories of their past flooded back and filled Victoria with such overwhelming emotions.  The pain that lay dormant in her heart was awakened once again.

“You always wanted to hide but me…“ Victoria swallowed hard to hold back her tears but she could not stop them anymore, “… I was so tired Zhou Mi. I was so tired of concealing my feelings. I was so tired… it hurts.”

“But you know what hurts the most?” Victoria looked at Zhou Mi with tears glistening from her eyes. Zhou Mi averted his gaze and stared at his lap. He felt he already knew the answer.

“It’s the fact that you have given me away.” Victoria said. “Why did you leave me behind during the time when I needed you the most? Why did you let me go? I was expecting you to stop it. I was expecting you to stand up for our love. I was expecting you to save me. Why did you not fight for me? Why did you give up on us?” Victoria finally got this chance to ask the questions that were left unanswered since they have parted their ways.

“I did not give up on us, Victoria,” Zhou Mi answered, finally looking straight to her eyes. “You’re the one who gave up. I told you to wait for me until I fix everything. Didn’t I promise to get you back as soon as everything was ready?”

“What are you getting ready for? Getting those riches? I don’t care for money. I don’t care for wealth, Zhou Mi! All I wanted was you! But what did you do? You did nothing at all. So can you blame if I fall for Kyuhyun who showed me the love that I’m looking for?” Victoria retorted.

“Your situation with Kyuhyun is different with mine. I wanted to prove myself worthy to your father, Vic! I wanted to show that I am not a mere lowly bastard he sees me to be. See all this, Vic.” Zhou Mi walked around the room. “These are fruits of my labor. This villa, this estate, this is all for you. Our company is also booming now.” He approached Victoria and held her hands. “I can now be the son-in-law that your father could be proud of. We can now show the world our love. We can start anew. See, I really regret that mistake. Please forgive me,” Zhou Mi said as he knelt down in front of Victoria. Victoria was surprised by this sudden action of Zhou Mi.

“I’ll be good to you this time. I’ll be better. I’ll even be better than Kyuhyun. This I promise you.” Zhou Mi pleaded as clung desperately to Victoria, hugging her knees.

“Zhou Mi, what are you doing? Just get up, already.” Victoria said as she tried to get Zhou Mi away from her.

“I won’t go until you accept me again!”

“Do you think it will be just as easy as that?!”

Zhou Mi stood up and he could no longer stop the outpouring of his emotions; of all his desperation and grief. “Kyuhyun is gone! Forever gone! He will no longer come back! A dead person never comes back from his grave. I thought you’re smart enough to understand that also!  Kyuhyun is dead! Freaking dead!”

*slap!

Zhou Mi received a painful slap on the cheek from Victoria.

“You don’t have to remind me that. But even though he is dead, you can never be better than him. You can never ever replace him. So just go.” Victoria told him.  Zhou Mi was floored with that declaration.

“What are you still doing? Get out!” Victoria pointed Zhou Mi to the door. Zhou Mi was not able to move away.  He was afraid that once he stepped out of that door, he might not be able to get her back and lose her forever.

“Vic – “

“Get out now!”

He was left with no choice. With tears on his eyes, he walked out of the room.

--------------------

She was first to be his. Now, all that he had were all thoughts of what if’s and what could have been’s.

They were friends since they were children but their friendship was something that Victoria’s father opposed. They were separated but they met again during high school and became lovers during their college days. That relation blossomed in secrecy and he thought they were both happy and contented with their own little world.

He was wrong.

When Victoria’s family was in the midst of bankruptcy, his father thought of having a merge with the Cho Enterprises through marriage of their children. Even though he wanted to help Victoria’s family, their company was not competitive and competent enough and it was also dependent to the Cho Enterprises. He convinced her to obey her father’s plans instead of agreeing with her plans to elope. He thought it was the better way. He knew better than go against her father. He knew what her father was capable of doing.

He was wrong.

He could still remember how much he reprimanded Victoria for constantly wanting to meet him.

“I told you to be discreet. You could ruin our plans.”

“I just wanted to see you. I miss you. How long will I have to wait?”

“Just a little bit more time, okay. I was about to seal a multimillion deal abroad. That would be enough to buy a major stock at Cho Enterprises.”

“What if you did not finish it until I get married?”

“Then you can always have divorce and then we’ll get away.”

“What if… What if I fall for him?

He thought that was a purely hypothetical question.

He was wrong.

He sealed the deal and he became a major stockholder of the Cho Enterprises. He was able to carry out all his plan, however, he was too late, Victoria has changed already.

What if he undid all those mistakes he’d done? Will they still be together?

-----------------

Kyuhyun went home to the apartment and was surprised to see Seohyun with a new and bright aura radiating from her.

“Seohyun is that really you?” Kyuhyun asked, seeing Seohyun finally smiling.

“I realized that what you said was true. There is no use being depressed. As they say, there is no use for crying over spilled milk.” Seohyun replied.

“I’m glad you realized that. That smile suits your face more.” Kyuhyun complimented.

That night for the first time, she has somebody to open up to.

Her savior has finally arrived.

“I try my best to be guarded but I’m an open book instead.”