Even after that sleepless night and the few that would follow, I refused to let Kris rain on my parade.

When he didn’t text or Skype the morning after his drunken tirade, I stayed strong. It was easy to get swept up in the rush of a new relationship. The knowledge that I could refer to Jin Woon as my boyfriend put a spring in my step. Once when walking to my next class, I caught myself smiling unconsciously from a reflective surface. So that’s how it was like to be a fool for love.

“Oh my god!” Luna’s squeal echoed through the cafeteria.

Choosing to tell my roommate the news in public was one regret in life. Although it wasn’t as though I had any choice since she had been shacking up with Onew lately, leaving her side of the room empty - there wasn’t any better time to do so. Giving a nearby startled fellow student an apologetic look, I hissed, “It’s not such a big deal.”

“I got to let Onew know. What do you mean it’s not such a big deal?” She looked up from her mobile, midway through texting. “I never seen you look so happy. You are practically glowing.”

Again, my roomie was right. I was floating on clouds, in class, through homework assignments and even on a full shift at the restaurant with Fei barking in the background.

Being an official couple meant Jin Woon now escorted me back to the dormitory, right to the door. The goodbye kiss stretched out to kisses as he lingered until I had to chase him home or to the studio.

Kissing the musician was unlike kissing my oldest friend.  I had been too young and bewildered when Wu Yi Fan ambushed me under the pavilion in the thunderstorm that very first time, a long time ago in Beijing. When Kris came close, everything was familiar, as though I’ve done it a thousand times before, even when I had tears running down my face during the last bittersweet one.

Jung Jin Woon was a whole different story. Fizzles of electricity that instantly shot through my body when his arms wrapped around me tight didn’t cease when he reluctantly moved away. My senses continued to buzz until I remembered to breathe again.

Kris had always taken the lead when it came to getting physical and I simply followed. Instead of being passive with my new boyfriend, I took an aggressive stance to find out what made Jin Woon cringe and what turned him on. I had no idea what came over me but it wasn’t as though I enjoyed playing coy.

As if he had been shot, the boy rapidly pulled away, “Whoa, hold on there.”

“What’s wrong?” It was a good thing that I didn’t use lipstick or else Jin Woon would be wearing it all over his face now.

“Aren’t we moving too fast?” His eyes were cast down pointedly to my hand that had wandered under his T-shirt.

Finally realising that we were still in the corridor, in full view of the world, I asked, “Want to come in? I don’t think Luna’s back yet.”

The smile on his face was strained as though Jin Woon was struggling internally. With awkward movements, he patted my head, “I better not. I don’t know whether I will be able to control myself.”

Holding back a giggle - who would have guessed the same person who sent girls weak at their knees with his baritone voice would be such a prude - I replied earnestly, “Even if you can’t, that’s alright with me.”

My own insides squirmed a little, I wasn’t accustomed to being so straightforward. I thought Jin Woon would naturally want to take our relationship to the next level, by virtue of his youth. Besides, we almost had that once.

“I wouldn’t want to do anything you would be uncomfortable with,” reasoned Jin Woon who had loosened his grip on my arms.

To be honest, the boy appeared more uncomfortable with the situation. He tried to explain, “It’s not that I don’t want to …”

“It’s OK, I understand.”

I was neither disappointed or relieved, I did get where he was coming from. It was me who didn’t know what to expect from this fresh relationship. After spending almost a lifetime joined at the hips with Kris, I couldn’t tell the right way to go about being a girlfriend - and not a future wife.

Wriggling away, I fumbled for the key in my backpack. When the door opened, I twirled around to give the boy a kiss before sending him off.

Going about my nighttime routine puttering around the empty room, it hit me that it was Tuesday night, yet again. Two weeks ago, Kris had thrown that huge tantrum and had promptly gone MIA. Despite myself, I had to admit I was worried that my best friend would set himself on the self destruction route like how he was prone to whenever he didn’t get his way.

Folding my laundry did nothing to distract me, so I decided to bite the bullet and give my mother a call. She was surprised - I had spoke to her over the phone just yesterday.

Since Kris and I had broken up, my mother and me had skirted around the topic like the white elephant in the room.

“Yi Fan? I haven’t seen him lately. He rarely comes home for dinner these days.”

I had to dig deeper for information, “Did Uncle Wu or Auntie Wu say anything?”

“Well, they did mention his late nights were getting intolerable,” After more prodding, my mother revealed that Kris has been coming home in the wee hours of the morning, reeking of alcohol, according to the help.

“I see.” God, the boy was really bent on inflicting as much harm on himself so he could hurt me. Kris had never taken any of his anger out on me although I had witnessed it first hand on several occasions - now everything was compounding.

“You know, Yi Fan is a real good catch.” My mother had to state the obvious. I wasn’t blind, of course I could see that Kris Wu was an very eligible bachelor. Hell, every girl back in California tried every trick in the book to get a second glance from him, even when they weren’t aware that he came from money.

Later on as I stared into space when I should have been working on a Macroeconomics assignment, I wondered for the umpteen time whether I should swallow my pride and contact Kris. God only knew all the stupid things that Kris was capable of when drunk. I could very well ignore it, I reasoned with myself, though I was worried about his behavior. He may have gone silen