Chapter 6

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The shaking ends with an abrupt stop as the engine let out a forcefull puff of smoke.

everything went dead.

The silence crept in on the passengers who had then groaned their way out of their seats and were  starting to pick their belongings out.

They moved slowly towards the blinking exit light inching hesitantly towards the unknown surrounding yet more promising than a bunch of melted leather and bent metals could ever promise them.

“Everyone please move in an orderly fashion towards the exit and gather a safe distance away from this plane. Please evacuate this aircraft as soon as possible as we would really like to avoid further unwanted incidents.” Heechul the head steward of the aircraft was heard directing people on what is suppose to be on their priority list and at the top of it is making sure that they all get the furthest away from the aircraft as they could because nobody could expect what would happen next and precautionary steps are to be taken.

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As the shook ended their senses took over, and as the smoke clears, yards and yards of greenery invades their sight, the smell of morning dew .... of the freshness that clung greedily to the slopes of leaves.....

epilogue

One Year later...

‘‘Hwannie-ah i think i’ve found someone to fall for, someone to love , someone to cherish. I don’t love him yet but i can’t imagine life without him so i’m going to try and that is as good as falling right? And..and you would pray for your hyung right? Pray for your hyung hwannie-ah” smiling lightly yoochun tilted his head up as if he was talking to his yoonger brother who had passed away.

Flashback...

“hy..’pant’....hyung...’pant’..hyung-ah... wh..what happened? What is this i heard about Yongseng having a boyfriend in the same uni as i am? I thought you guys were dating?is he playing with you?”

Rushed words slipped through yoochun’s silence. He was then trying to block the pain of his break up by drinking.

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“yoochun let’s just end this here” yoochun was then trying to celebrate his forth year anniversary with his younger boyfriend, Yongseng.

The abruptness of the matter left Yoochun speechless as he tried to align his thoughts in a more intangible manner..”....ah?wh..what?”

“i said, let’s end this, break up, move on” the absolute emptiness and resignation of the words leaving his boyfriend’s mouth, left his gaping and his heart bleeding.

“but..but, sengie why? I thought we’re happy.... you’re happy.” Confusion painted Yoochun’s face, creased forehead and thinning lips.

“Yes Yoochun-sshi... We WERE happy! Were before you decided to lead this aimless life of errands and part time jobs.” Malice laced the words that yongseng spew.

“what? Is it because we can’t go to the five star Italian restaurant that you wanted? Or because i couldn’t change your wardrobe anymore except occasional couple shirts? But i thought you like those! You said it was nice. Cute and personal!! “ the formal term used by the younger reared a more intense reaction out of Yoochun.

“i...I do...” Yongseng tilted his head down avoiding the searching gaze of his now ‘ex’ boyfriend.

“Then why suddenly?sengie-ah, i’ll change ok? I’ll change....” Yoochun’s questioning reduced itself to mere mumbles and murmurs as sobs wrecked him.

Pitying the other man , yongseng find himself wavering on his decision..’no you can’t yongseng! This is for his own good! You need to do this!’  hearing his inner voice cheering him, he once again steeled.

“no Yoochun. It’s not because of that and you know it! It’s because while you’re with me you’re too relax, too comfortable that you’re slipping on your own self , and you don’t even feel it. But i see it. I watch it...” Catching his breath Yongseng looked at the person that had been holding his heart for the past four years before continuing...

“It’s in your dull gazes, your strecthed smiles and just mostly your clinginess to me. You know that you never cling! You never beg, but you’re doing it now and it hurts cause it just proves my theory and it hurts me”

“..........”..The sudden confession from Yongseng that was then trying to contain his sobs, left yoochun picking out the truth beneath the words uttered.

“and I know that as long as i’m still here, you’ll stay like this. I’ll be your safety sling, your cave that you run to, just to escape this reality and for that i’m starting to hate myself . Because I once saw the potential in you, the fire... but now it’s slowly fading and i’m part of the reason . So it’s killing me. Please let me go before i really kill myself Chunnie....please”

“but..but i love you...”doesn’t really know how to take of his ex’s reasoning he tried conveying his feelings hoping it’d somehow tie their hearts together in an unsolved knot.

“please Chunnie.. do it if you love me...please do it for our love ok?” as soon as the words escaped his mouth Yongseng turned his body around, making his back facing yoochun’s tear stained face.

After a few steps yongseng was then joined by a raven-haired boy, all concerned face .

Understanding dawned yoochun..’that their time has passed, all he had left to do now was just to let go of his lost love cause it’s too far gone to catch, it’s too broken to keep and just too lost to search for’

That day mark the last day yoochun ever speak of those three words...’i love you’ cause the last time he said it, he pushed someone further away from him with the intensity, he dragged someone down with the weight of it. All because of his love, so he stopped loving anyone except his brother, his family , his sanctuary. Because of that he finds himself jumping from one person to another trying desperately to find back the reason to love, the rush of emotions, the thumps of heart, the swing of limbs.

He was then a player, playing the games of love, tasting, holding but never keeping, never loving...just having.

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Sensing his brother’s concern yoochun pulled his brother’s wrist and pushed him into a seat.

“yoohwan-ah...you love hyung right?” near drunked yoochun find himself wanting to hide from the world under his brother’s protective arms.

“wh...what?? of course hyung!!! Are you...alright? you need me to do anything? Ask yongseng for an explaination maybe?” concerned flashed through yoohwan’s orbs seeing his brother’s out of the norm character.

“as long as you love me hwannie....as long as you love...it’ll be alright...i’ll be ok...i just need time...yes, time....” yoochun nod of his ddongsaeng’s concern with sleepy murmurs as tiredness swamp his features.

Sensing that there’s nothing more he could do , yoohwan pulled his brother’s neck towards his neck, forming an embrace, circling his brother, protecting him from the horrid thing called life.

The next morning found yoochun waking up to the blinding sunlight with a cracking neck , sore eyes but with a much lighter heart as he notice his sleeping brother leaning on the wall. His arms still tightly holding his brother..

Just like that the break up was nothing but a mere memory, nothing to be hurt upon .

Yoochun smiled for the tomorrow that he had yet to live , to love.

End of flashback....

“pray for my happiness hwannie...pray for your hyung’s happiness”..as soon as the words left yoochun’s mouth, a breeze passed through racking slowly through his hair, leaving it tousled.

‘‘was that a sign? Do you agree with me?” tempted to link the natural phenomena to his one-sided situation yoochun voiced his question.

Suddenly a warm breath and a voice was heard on his left ear...’always hyung...always...’

And just like that yoochun is another step lighter, his smile was a little tad higher and his future though still as blurred as before, at least now it’s with a purpose...’ to make Changmin mine and me his’

“thank you ddongsaeng-ah...thank you” the thankful tears that escaped his eyelids grazed his rosy cheeks.

“’ in the darkness of the nights, i’m afraid
you tell me now~but we are not alone oh “’

The sudden sound of his ringtone shook yoochun out of his stupor. He quickly dragged the answer sign of his android.

“hye Minnie!” his smile laced the words , knowing before hand who it was, even before the caller could identify himself.

“owh..what? don’t hye me!!! Where are you? Aren’t you suppose to be at home right now?” Changmin’s loud voice was then heard answering him, questioning him of his whereabouts, all snark laced but the concern edging it was not left unheard to yoochun’s keen ear.

“owh...mian minnie-ah...i’m with yoohwan now..you know telling him of our lives..”

Not wanting to be too quick in his relationship’s growth he hid a few details of his visit to the valley..’what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him, and i won’t hurt him! I promise...’.

Silence issued , as Changmin knew how affected yoochun is of any matter’s involving his younger brother...

“eerrr...owh..ok just.. just don’t take too long ok...you know...you do know what today is right? Suddenly unsure of how to approach the main reason for his call , Changmin stuttered a reply.

“of course i know Changmin-ah!!! It’s our first anniversary right? I wouldn’t miss it for the world...just wait till i’m finish with you...haha” sensing his partner’s tension seeping through, yoochun quickly lighten the mood by slipping obvious innuendos, knowing that it will surely leave Changmin red and embarassed.

“.....” he was right when all he got was the sound of breathing followed by the sound of a throat being cleared.

“okay baby see you at home i’ll be there in ten.” Suddenly hit by unbounded desire to be wrapped by his lover’s heat he quickly intend to end the conversation.

“no! Make it twenty so that i’ll know that you’d at least try to drive within the speed limit ok?!owh and Chunnie? i  think i love you...no  no  i know i do”....and then a click was heard.

Yoochun  was speechless as the words assault his sense leaving him tingling and nervous...’ aish pabo minnie..even when he wants to confess it’s very cute haha...and..i think i love you too...i love you too Shim Changmin’ and just like that yoochun stood up from his sitting position beside his brother’s grave while dusting off imaginary dust with a smile etched on his lips.

All because he finally has somewhere to go back to, someone to love .

And just like that all those feverish nightmares that used to plaque , sticking close like chewed gums fell off. They fell of exactly 365 days ago, the day he first caught sight of his man-boy...His saviour..

                                    Fin.

A/n- i AM really really sorry for the abrupt ending but it's cause i have written the ending but the middle has suddenly lost me...kuku

but i'll try to make oneshots of what really happened after they crash...I just really need to put forth this ending cause i like it hehe...

because it's the kind of happy ending that I would really like to happen to me..:))

Anyway enjoy and till next entry...:))