(Tiffany POV)

 

It’s almost dinner time, what should I cook? Ah, it’s been awhile since the last time I cooked pasta for Jessi. Okay, I’m going to cook carbonara for dinner, Jessi must be happy because that’s her favorite dish *eyes smile* ^^

 

I was on my way to the market to buy ingredients when I walked past the park. Then I saw a couple, kissing so passionately.

 

The coat… Seems familiar…

 

Her blonde hair…

 

I dropped my bag. I can’t believe what I saw right in front of me. My girlfriend, Jessica...She’s kissing another girl!

 

She looked at me. Her jaw dropped.

 

“ you, Jess!” I yelled at her. “You said you wanted to visit Sooyoung, huh? Instead you met that and kissed her!”

 

***

 

“I’m sorry, Tiff… I’m really sorry” she kept telling that. I didn’t look at her and kept packing my things. I can’t live with her anymore.  I tried hard not to cry, but I could feel tears already fill my eyes.

 

“Please, Tiff… I’m begging you, please, don’t go…” she held my hands. Finally, tears ran down my cheeks. I couldn’t hold it anymore.

 

“I’m sorry, Tiff… I promise, I won’t ever do that again. I promise. I love you so much, Tiff… Please, don’t go…”

“I can’t, Jess… I can’t live with you anymore… Knowing what you did to me earlier, I, I…” I sobbed, couldn’t continue my words.

“I swear I won’t do that anymore! I swear!”

“I’m sorry, Jess. Maybe we better off this way… Maybe I’ll be better without you…”

 

I’m sorry Jess, I love you, it’s a lie if I said I didn’t love you anymore. But I can’t… It really hurts me.

 

It hurts…

 

I was finally getting up after I packed my things. I walked to the front door, but then I stopped and turned around and looked at her.

 

She really didn’t cry…

 

Am I not worth of your tears?

 

I know you promised your mom that you never cried anymore… But…

 

“You know what? I felt so stupid, crying in front of you, when you don’t even have single tears in your eyes…”

 

She looked shock. “Tiff, you knew that I-”

“Yes, I know" I cut her.

"I just thought, maybe… Maybe you could… Never mind” I lowered my head.

 

“Goodbye…” I smiled to her and walked out from her house.

 

Goodbye, Jess… I love you…

 

***

 

It’s been a week since I moved out from Jessica’s house. Now I live in small apartment near my office. And for this one week, not for once Jessie ever called me.

 

Why didn’t you call me? Why didn’t you beg me to come back with you again?

 

I didn’t change my number, nor my office…

So, why…?

 

Are you happy that we broke up?

 

Have you not loved me anymore…?

 

***

 

I was at the supermarket to buy groceries when suddenly I felt someone touched my shoulder.

 

“Tiffany...?”

 

I looked at the latter in front of me, but I didn’t seem to know her…

 

“You are Tiffany, right?”

“Err… Yes… And you are…?”

 

She suddenly hugged me, I almost lost my balance.

 

“It’s me, Tiff! Taeyeon!” she smiled really wide.

 

Tae…Yeon…?

 

“Oh my God! Kim Taeyeon!”  I hugged her even tighter.

 

***

 

“Tiff” Taeyeon called me, she’s on my apartment right now.

“Yes, Tae?”

“You know… After Heechul oppa got married, I live alone in my house…” I nodded.

 

“So… How about you move in with me?”

“Huh? You want me to move in to your house?”

“Yes! Come on, Tiff… It’ll be fun… And you don’t have to pay rent anymore. You can save it to buy other things. Isn’t that good?”

 

***

 

I remember the smell of pink roses you gave me.

I miss it.

I miss you.

 

“Tae, can I plant pink roses at your front yard?”

 

***

 

“Tiff, my company will hold a party next week, and I want you to come, okay” Taeyeon told me.

“Me? Why should I?”

“Because you need to go out, Tiffany… Tell me, when was the last time you went out and had fun?”

 

I kept silent…

It’s been a long time since the last time I did that…

 

“But, Tae-“

“No but. You’ll go. Besides, there will be Heechul oppa, you won’t get bored”

 

I will never win over The Mighty Kim Taeyeon.

 

“Okay, I’ll go”

 

***

 

“Oppa, where are you?” I asked him through my phone.

“I already at the hall, Fany, where are you?”

“Me too! I wear a pink dress, oppa, where exactly are you?”

“Pink dress? Oh, I see you, Fany! Look at your front, I’m waving my hand”

 

I look at my surrounding and found a waving man not far from where I stand.

 

“Heechul oppa!” I ran to him and hugged him. “Omo, you’re more handsome now that you’re already married” I .

“Hahaha I always handsome, Fany, it’s just you that slow to realize it” he showed me his wide smile.

 

I felt so happy meeting Heechul oppa, because he’s so damn funny. He told me about his honeymoon with Sohee unnie and I kept giggling because he told me in funny ways.

 

Then I looked at people around me.

 

Whoa… Taeyeon’s company is sure a big one. People here are no joke! I’m sure that I’ve seen some of them on television. Some are celebrities, and some are politicians.

 

Then I looked at ‘that’ girl.

 

What? She’s just staring at me continuously.

 

My jaw dropped when I realized who she is.

 

I was staring back at her.

Her loosened blonde hair…

Her sparkling eyes that I found so attractive…

Beautiful.

 

Jessica is beautiful.

 

I saw water on her cheeks.

 

What was that? Did she just cry? Was that tears on her face?

But, why…?

 

Then she wiped her tears and lowered her head.

 

Why did she cry?

She didn’t even cry when I left her, but why now?

Did my presence make her sad?

 

I saw Taeyeon approached her. They talked and left.

 

Taeyeon… She knew Jessica?

 

***

 

“Yes I like her… I like Jessica… So much…”

 

My eyes widen when I heard my best friend confessed about her feeling towards my ex-girlfriend.

 

Taeyeon likes Jessica!

She likes her!

My best friend loves my ex-girlfriend!

 

“And I already confessed to her”

 

WTF MAN!

 

“What?? You already confessed?”

 

Does that mean she and Jessica are now…

 

“But she rejected me”

 

Oh My God, could I get more surprised?

 

“She rejected you…?”

“Yeah… She rejected me… Because she already has someone she loved”

“You mean… She’s already taken?

Taeyeon shooked her head, “ No, she’s still in love with her ex-lover”

 

Okay, you got me.

I got more surprised now…

 

***

 

I heard someone just knocked on the door.

 

“Yes, wait, please”

 

I opened the door.

 

And that’s her.

 

My ex.

My best friend’s crush.

My love.

My Jessica.

 

***

 

Why…?

Today is very very hot. But why did she wear such thick clothes?

Is she sick?

.

.

.

“Umm… How are you, Tiff…? She asked me.

Finally… A conversation… I thought we would be in this awkward moment forever.

 

“I’m… Fine…” I answered with a bit of awkwardness on my voice. “How about you, Jess? Are you sick?”

 

She looked surprised with my question, “No, I’m fine… Why?”

 

“Your clothes… That jacket… Isn’t that too thick for this hot weather?”

 

“I’m not sick… This jacket… I wore this because I’ve lost my body warmth… Well, I lost that… Since you left me three years ago”

 

Huh? Is there really such a thing?

Did I… Really caused big impact when I left her…?

 

***

 

“Why did you cry when you saw me at your company’s party? You’re not a person who could easily cry…” I asked her.

“Was my presence there made you sad?”

 

“No, no! Of course not!” I was surprised that she suddenly raised her voice.

 

“Instead… I was too happy to see you, that my eyes couldn’t hold back my tears anymore…” She said. “I… I miss you, Tiff… I miss you so much…”

 

DEGG.

What did she just say? She missed me so much?

Why… Why my heart’s beating so fast right now…

 

Well, I missed her so much too I can’t deny…

Should I be happy that she said she missed me?

 

But how come? If she really missed me, why did she never come to see me?

Not even once!

 

“Liar…” I blurted out.

 

“What? Why should I lie to you?”

“If you really missed me, why did you never come to look for me?”

 

“I… I was… I was afraid… That you didn’t wanna see me… Because you said that you might be better without me…”

 

Is she dumb or what?

She cheated on me! Of course I had to say mean things! What did she expect me to say? That I wanted to leave her but I didn’t really want to leave her?

 

“So you never come to me because you were afraid?”

 

“Ye… Yes…” she lowered her head.

 

Stupid!!

 

“You’re so stupid, Jess”

 

She looked at me, “Yes, Tiff, I know that I’m stupid. But please believe me, I do miss you so much… I miss you, that it hurts to see you again after three years, but you were with someone else. It hurts me to see you smiling happily with that man… I was… I was so angry that I wanted to punch him… I… I…”

 

What…? She’s jealous with Heechul oppa?

Silly.

He’s Taeyeon’s brother, and I treat him like my own brother… Besides, he's already married…

 

“That man, he is…”

 

I was about to tell Jessica about Heechul oppa, when the front door opened.

 

“I’m home!”

 

***

 

“Anyway, let me introduce you to my lovely roommate. She’s Tiffany, my childhood friend… She’s very beautiful, isn’t she?” she pointed at me.

 

“I already introduced myself to her earlier… And thank you for complimenting me” I shyly said to her.

 

“I know you already greeted each other before, I just want to introduce you both officially” she grinned to both of us. “And Tiffany, she is Jessica, my coworker… She has a weird complex, she always feel cold! Look at her clothes! Hahaha, weird, isn’t it?”

 

Yes it’s weird.

And she said I was the one who caused that complex?

 

I then offered my hand to her, asking for a handshake.

 

Her eyes looked sad, because I decided to pretend that I didn’t know her before.

 

I’m sorry Jessi, but Taeyeon loves you. I… I just don’t want to disappoint her…

Because you rejected her and said that you still in love with your ex-girlfriend…

 

***

 

“I was very happy to see there are pink roses at your yard…” Jessica said. “Because… That’s my favorite flower”

 

I was shocked and looked at her. She looked at me too, and smiled.

 

That’s my favorite flower… And she used to give me that flower often…

 

Why Jessi? Are you really still in love with me?

Should I be happy?

 

Or not?

 

***

 

“Uhm… By the way… Are you… Still has feeling for her?” I carefully asked Taeyeon.

“I don’t know, Tif…” she sighed. “I know that she already rejected me… I know that she loves someone else… But… I think… I still love her…”

 

Taeyeon loves her.

 

Do I still have feelings for her too?

I…

I don’t know.

 

***

 

“Tiffany”

 

I turned around, and I saw her.

 

What the hell is she doing here?

.

.

.

“So… Why are you here?”

 

“I want to talk to you… About my feeling…

I know we haven't spoken for a really long time. But I was always thinking about you all this time…”

 

Oh no, I think I know where this conversation is going…

 

“Did you know I kept all of your pictures? I didn't have the strength to part with them yet…”

“I was lost without you… I miss you so much…”

 

No, please don’t continue…

Please…

 

“I’m sorry for that night, Tiff… I’m really sorry…”

“I love you”

 

Damn it!

 

“Tiffany…”

“Will you be mine?”

 

Stupid Jessi! Stupid!

Why should she say that right now? Where was she two years ago? A year ago?

Why now?

 

You broke my heart three years ago… Yet I can’t seem to forget you.

 

Yes, I still love this girl in front of me.

But I can’t help but feel insecure.

What if she’ll break my heart again? I don’t think I can’t survive with another heartbreak…

 

“Jess”

“Ye… Yes…?”

 

“Did you remember the man that was with me on your company’s anniversary party?”

“Yes… I… Remember” she nervously answered.

“That man… His name is Kim Heechul… He is Taeyeon’s brother”

 

“And he is… My fiancé…”

 

I didn’t know why I lied to her…

 

“Why…? Do you not love me anymore…?”

 

“Love…? What is love? I’m no longer believe in love. After someone who I thought I loved the most, cheated on me with another woman”

“Did you forget, Jess? YOU CHEATED ON ME!" I shouted. "You cheated on me… You cheated… You...” tears finally run down my cheeks.

 

I wiped my tears with the back of my right palm.

… I’d tried to be as strong as possible, but I’m always weak in front of her…

 

“I’m sorry, Tiff… Don’t cry, please… I’m sorry…” she tried to hug me, but I slapped her hand. Her touch will make me weaker. I can’t let her.

 

“Jessie…” finally I spoke in calm tone.

“Taeyeon… You know… She loves you…”

 

“Yes, I know… I already rejected her…”

“Why…?”

 

“It’s obvious, Tiff. I still love you…”

“But now you know that I have fiancé, will you reconsider her feeling?”

 

“What… What do you mean, Tiff?”

“Even though you rejected her, even though she knew you loved someone else… She still loves you…”

 

“I think… It’s better if you are with her…”

 

What did I just say?

 

“NO! I love you, Tiff! I only love you! I always love you! I can’t be with someone else!”

“But you can’t be with me either, Jess!” I shouted at her again.

 

I know I might regret my decision later.

I know.

 

“Do you really mean it, Tiff? Do you... Really want me to be with Taeyeon?” she asked.

 

No, of course no!

I love you, stupid!

 

“Yes”

 

***

 

I saw her car in front of Taeyeon’s house.

Got closer, huh?

 

“Taeng, I’m home” I said when I came inside.

 

I saw Jessica sitting in the living room.

 

“Oh, Jessica… You’re here…” I greeted her.

“Yes, I took Taeng home…”

 

And then Taeyeon came from her room, after changing her work clothes.

 

“Hi, Tiff, you’re home” she happily greeted me and hugged me tightly.

“Whoa… What’s with you? You looked so happy”

 

Taeyeon smiled widely and walked to Jessica’s side.

 

“I have a very good news, Tiff…” she said while linking her arm in Jessica’s.

 

Don’t tell me…

 

“What...?” then I saw their linking arm and immediately my jaw dropped. “Wow! Don’t tell me… Are you both…?”

“YES!” Taeyeon shouted happily.

“Aww, congrats Taenggoo!” I hugged her and laughed together.

 

Fake.

 

Yeah, I had to fake a smile for my best friend happiness.

 

It was me who told Jessica to be with her, right?

But… Why does it hurt to see them finally together?

 

***

 

PRESENT

 

“See you tomorrow, Miss Tiffany” the children bid me goodbye.

“Yeah, see you, guys…”

 

Today is extremely hot, oh my God. I really want to go home faster, and eat some ice cream I bought yesterday.

 

I was walking to go home when I saw a woman with thick jacket standing in front of the gate of the school.

 

Thick jacket in this hot weather…

It can’t be someone else but ‘her’.

 

I looked at her, and I saw anger in her eyes.

 

Okay…

Seems like she already found out…

 

***

 

 

 

 

Okay, okay...

I know you all are angry with me because it takes me forever to update this story.

 

I'M SORRY! I'M REALLY REALLY SORRY! :(((

 

I won't promise that I will update soon, BUT I promise I WILL UPDATE! ^^

 

I know there's many grammar mistakes on this chapter, and that's because my english is not very good.

But at least you know what is the story about, right? Ahahahahaha.

 

Hope you like this chapter ^^

See you on the next update!

 

My twitter ----> @STPHNHWANG ^^