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...I don’t know.

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Warning: Contain a little bit foul word.

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The taxi was stop with loud screeched sound and Siwon automatically scrambled out of the taxi without wasting another seconds. He calling Heechul’s name, again and again. Impatient and desperation layering his voice, nervousness make his palm sweaty when his call get nothing as answer except his own echo bouncing inside the house. “Heechul ah.” He calling her name again as he walking briskly into the kitchen and he found Heechul’s phone lying on table, dead. A cup of tea still sat on the previous spot as far as Siwon’s remember, so does a half bitten apple. The bad feeling starts clouding his mind as he continuing his journey, afraid if his imagination became true.

He slid down limply as if someone had taken all bone in Siwon’s body after him entering Heechul’s bedroom. Half of her clothes were gone, so does her big suitcase. He shattered in little pieces now, not only his heart but also his mind and body. He gripped his own hair, pulling it, the pain feeling on his scalp gave anchor on him for not becoming a sobbing mess, but he couldn’t help the urge for screaming as loud as he could, when the suffocated feeling make him hard to breath and he needed to freed himself. He hit the floor repeatedly, as if the stinging pain on his hand was nothing if compared with pain inside his heart. Blood starts seeped out from little wound on his skin and bruised starts forming. “Heechul, why?” He questioning when his fist hit the floor again. “Am I didn’t make you happy?” he grabbed the vase near him and throw it across the room, break into tiny pieces when collided with wall, a close representation of Siwon’s condition now.

Another emotion enveloping him and the feeling was exact the same with emotion he felt when his parents passed away. His mind yelling at him for stopping hurting his body, his heart begged to him to get a grip on himself. Kyuhyun stopped him when he almost hitting the mirror hanging on the wall. “You owe me a lot of explanation hyung and I don’t want to hear this ‘Nothing’ bull because I know it’s more than nothing this time.” He gripped Siwon’s fist tightly. Challenging his hyung to open up a bit wider again than before for him and letting Kyuhyun knew the sorrow he always kept for himself.

“Heechul…” Siwon began and the rest of story made Kyuhyun bewilderment and speechless.

“Your life looks like a ing drama hyung, except this is real.” He remarked, carefully studying change of Siwon’s expression and he only found a glum face with soulless eyes. “And you already madly in love with her, you won’t be same without her.” He added inwardly.

Siwon smiled bitterly. The wound on his hand starts giving stinging pain as he unconsciously rubbing it using his other hand.

“Let’s go to airport. Maybe we can catch up her.” He grabbing Siwon’s hand and didn’t give his hyung a minute to protest. He revved the car and drove as fast as possible. He knew the possibility they would met Heechul at airport was almost impossible, but there’s nothing wrong if trying first, thought Kyuhyun, besides, no one could guess someone's luck.

They ran as fast as they leg could bring them when they entering the airport. “Paris…Plane to Paris…” Kyuhyun panting and in the same time trying to asking question but ended with him made a incoherent sentence and make the security guard confused.

“When the plane to Paris will departure?” Siwon stepped in the scene and asked, somehow Kyuhyun’s effort to make him met with Heechul although he knew nearly impossible had triggering something inside him and he knew, he shouldn’t give up yet, at least before he trying first.

“Oh, I’m not really sure, but you can ask the person over there.” They rushed again, didn’t want to waste any second they have.

“The plane to Paris?”

“Oh, it had departured 30 minutes ago, Sir.”

“What? Can I know the passenger name list?” Kyuhyun asked again while Siwon already numb, he couldn’t move nor think, everything seem look incoherent in his sense now.

“It’s private, sir. I’m sorry.”

“Please…Please…Help us.” He begged but the official still with her decision.

“Kyuhyun.” Siwon put his hand on Kyuhyun’s shoulder, “Let’s go.” He dragged the younger away despite of Kyuhyun’s protests.

“Hyung, let me go! We can try. We will know whether Heechul noona was on that plane or not.”

“Kyuhyun, stop it!” Siwon snapped.

“Hyung?”        

“Have you ever thought that Heechul actually pursuing her happiness by left me behind? No? Of course not. You’re too naïve for believing happily ever after really exist in this world.” Said Siwon with biting tone, trying to look strong despite he knew all of that was a lie. “Let’s go. I need to change my clothes and back to office.” He turned around and walking away.

“But at least I'm trying and fighting until my last effort before I give up.” Said Kyuhyun and make Siwon’s step halted, he didn’t dare to turn around and facing Kyuhyun. “I’m disappointed with you, hyung.”

“I’m also more disappointed with myself, Kyuhyun.” He said quietly.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

A loud slapping sound ripped the silence was currently enveloping the room. All of person was shocked after saw the scene had happened. Donghae hurriedly rushes to his girlfriend’s side and calming her when she was about to slap Siwon again. Sungmin bury her head on Kyuhyun’s shoulder, too sad and shock for moving and comforting Siwon, while Hankyung was trying hard to control his emotion. His fist tight beside his body. Siwon head bowed low. Siwon had gathering all people he knew had connection with Heechul to inform them about Heechul and he had predicted this kind of outburst from Eunhyuk, he even had prepared himself for the worst outburst from Hankyung, so when that girl slap him, he felt he’s deserved to get that.

“You ing promise to protect her yet you let her go! What kind of boyfriend are you?” Eunhyuk exploded again, her face as red as her hair now. Her body trembled in anger despite tears running down on her cheek, “You separate her from us for months and that’s for her own good, you say, but what you had done?” She broke down in Donghae’s arm. Donghae didn’t said anything, just held her close. He’s in no position to judge or stating opinion, Donghae understand that. He’s present only because of Eunhyuk.

Eunhyuk’s words piercing Siwon’s heart. He solemnly admits that was his fault, whether right or not. He lost Heechul when she was with him and not with someone else, so the only person who responsible was definitely him.

“I think you absolutely understand the disappointment in my heart now.” Hankyung said, despite calm, but Siwon understand Hankyung now was trying to hold back all of his emotion and Siwon could only nod.

“We’ll look for her.” Hankyung continued.

“But Heechul noona with Geunsuk now and we don’t know where he is now.” Kyuhyun butted in. He took a pity of his hyung and he thought he should at least defend him although a bit.

“Geunsuk is famous god damn it. We could ask people in his office about his address in Paris. I just don’t want we sit and do nothing when we knew maybe she now live with a bastard like him.”

“What if that was really her decision? What if she really happy with him?” asked Siwon quietly.

“Are you ing nuts? I do understand how much Heechul hate him and I know my best friend, he can be anything but a good liar. Can’t you see how obvious her gesture when she said she didn’t love you but the truth is she loves you? Her gesture speaks louder than her words for God sake.”

“Eunhyuk, please calm down. Your anger won’t bring Heechul’s back. We need to calm down.” Sungmin cooed. She couldn’t take the pressure any longer. She thought everything happen now was so unfair for Siwon. He didn’t deserve to take all the blame by himself, but in same time, there's no other person who could take the blame beside Siwon. Maybe Siwon was right. What if Heechul’s actually happy with her decision? And maybe Eunhyuk was right too, what if Heechul doing that with perforce because Geunsuk threaten her? And there’s another possibility which make her head hurt.

“So, what we’ll waiting for. Let’s move!” Hankyung stood up and the rest following him.

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The mansion's ambience today, was strangely, gave an eerie feeling as if the mansion had known what would happen later. Jieun stood near window, her eyes fixed to mansion gate across the front yard but her mind fly to somewhere else.

Flashback

Jieun knew Geunsuk have a secret room inside the mansion that no one besides him has ever entering the room. At first, Jieun didn’t give a damn about anything or something inside the room but her curiosity getting bigger, so one day she sneaked into the room using spare key she found accidentally at kitchen shelves and she found her biggest shock. Her eyes travelled around the room and fixed to one giant picture at wall. Her eyes widen after she finally recognizing the figure inside it. That was Heechul's picture and made from thousand of Heechul's tiny picture. Geunsuk had arranged the pictures one by one until finally the giant mosaic of Heechul's face formed. Her heart trembled, she couldn't put a finger to emotion she felt right now, that was like combination of fear, admiration, anger, respect, pity, just name it. All this time she knew Geunsuk would have never been able to forget her, but she didn’t know until this extent. She found a document lying on table, as she reading the document, she realized the document was about Geunsuk's crime. One of that was the money laundry act he do using his company as disguise but before she could bring the document with her, she heard Geunsuk’s voice and made her ran as fast as possible from the room, after that she involved in accident before she could tell anyone about that room. When she tried going back to the room, he found the document had missing, only left Heechul’s giant picture behind.

End of flashback

“…Jieun?” Yongguk’s voice brought her back to reality as she turned around and found him smiling.

“Himchan said, Mister Geunsuk had left Seoul, he’ll come in maybe 13 hours or more and Himchan said we weren’t in mansion so he could come to mansion. I had told the detective too. We couldn’t catch him in airport or we’ll pull unnecessary attention from reporter. So, we'll wait until he come.”

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, but don’t forget about your promise. Himchan had helped us as best as he could.”

“I understand.”

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Heechul sat at balcony with bored written all over her face. Hyosung had a shift at hospital that’s why she left house since dawn. She playing with the phone Himchan had left behind for her since she forgotten her own phone when suddenly the nausea kicked in. She ran to bathroom and throw up. A pair of soft hand suddenly massaged her back and Hyosung's statement made Heechul shocked more than her sudden appearance, “I think you’re pregnant, Heechul sshi.” Heechul splashes the water onto her face and turn around with wide eye.

“H-How…you…”

“I’m a doctor, Heechul, if you forget.” Hyosung cut her off and smiled, “And I guess your pregnancy maybe only a few weeks or almost a month, judging from your belly that still look flat and based of the nausea you always feel.” She maybe would continue telling Heechul her theories if not because of shocked looks on Heechul’s face had changed a bit into sad look.

“I’m sorry, Heechul sshi.” She touched Heechul’s arm, “Did this baby's father is my brother?” asked her. Despite Himchan told her that Heechul only his friend, but who know the truth behind his words, right?

Heechul shook her head weakly and Hyosung sighed in relief.

“Do you regretting your pregnancy?” She asked again.

“I…” Heechul swallowed an invisible lump that had blocked ; make her uncomfortable when she wants to uttering her answer, “...I don’t know.” She answered with tears starts rolling down on her cheek.

-TBC-

A/N: Arghh…when this story will finish? I already made the new one about Sichul...hohoho…(shamelessly promoting my own story here)

Reply 43-Thank you so much ^^

PusPusMayPuSiwon : What should I do to make your pain go away???? /hug you tightly/

punklena : Uhmmmahahaha…I don’t know what should I say ^^

bluebaby28 : How about now? Can you feel my heart beat Siwon feeling?

hyunsmiley : I hope soo…/crossing my finger/

loser220 : Yes, and maybe worst than jail…(in my opinion…hohoho)

AbigailBrown : Agreed with you. Geunsuk supposedly like Kibum, sadly, he didn’t know when or how to stop…Eunhae/Haehyuk wedding..yeayy..Can it happen with this entire problem? Hohoho..

chuldeREIlla137 : Hahaha..agree..Hope he didn’t turn like Geunsuk. Become obsessive.

shooOoog : hahahaha, you right…no one can resist chullie ^^

rossy80 : yes, or maybe they’ll made double wedding? Kekeke…

lukianara : hihi..he’s indeed cute..updateee

maedeh : You’re welcome…^^

mangafrick : Updatteee…

samirajoon : I’m not gonna kill you, Heechul or Himchan, hehehehe…yup, Himchan pretend, he’s going to Paris with Heechul when in fact she stayed with his sister ^^..you’re welcome..

haehaenemo : (chapter 11) yeah, me too..hahaha…and yeah, Kibum was kinda antagonist in this story.

haehaenemo : (chapter 23) that’s nothing special. They just take a bath /pretending to be innocent/ (I give that to your imagination about anything happened behind the bathroom door XD)

haehaenemo : (chapter 31) Calm down…Calm down..

Help me please..Do you know the original source of this picture? I wish it's really Siwon picture and not fanart or maybe this is actually Siwon doppelganger? *gasp* no, just kidding. Help me please... Thank you...(Damn..he look hotter than my bias Minnie *sobs*)

EDIT: I found it.. Thank you..and yes, this is from SK Telecom ad.. :D