Station Three
All That I Need To Survive + The Station
I dried my tears knowing I am near to my destination.
Its been a year.
And I am still trapped in his memory.
The bus moves slowly.
I peek at the window.
…….and the bus stop...
….at The Station.
Nervously I step out.
My knees shaking.
And stared for awhile at the bench.
Then I glance to my left..
The place where I last saw him smiling back at me.
“Jiyong….”
I couldn’t help not to call his name.
The name that is tattooed forever in my heart.
Slowly I sat on the empty bench.
And I sighed.
Forcing myself not to cry.
I remembered how he puts some locks of my hair behind my ear.
Unconsciously my reflexes did the same thing.
I hug myself because of the coldness that embraced me.
And the memory of Jiyong’s warm hug flashed in my head.
I think the rain felt my grief as it starts to pour...
Creating a clinking sound from the roof..
For awhile I listened to its sound.
But the longer I listened to it.
The longing increased in my heart.
My tears fell instantly.
Suddenly the remorse I kept for myself burst out.
“Jiyong….. why?....... Why do you have to leave me like that?......... I love you Jiyong with all my heart. I gave my all to you. I never left anything for myself….... but what did you do? You just broke my heart….. into pieces…. Isn’t breaking my heart enough for you?”
I pause but still my tears continued to pour .
“Why do you have to take away my life too? .........You promised that you’ll only love me. You promised I owned your heart. You told me your not gonna hurt me again. You promised to take care of me forever….. but you broke it Jiyong……. You broke my heart….. and left me into pieces….”
I’ve been longing to say this all to him.
“But its too late Jiyong…..”
I smiled grimly to the rain.
We love to play under the rain.
It makes us feel so carefree..
He loves the rain.
And I learn to love it too.
With that thought…
I step out from the shade.
And continued my purpose.
Not minding of the cold rain hitting my tiny body.
“Jiyong, I am sorry…. I can’t still forget you…… But its too late…….our time is over…..and it is so unfair…Jiyong! So unfair!”
Three years ago, Jiyong and I met at the same station.
I was visiting my parents grave…
And he was visiting his brother’s …
Since then , we knew that there is an invisible bond between us..
And we ended up together..
Everything went fine….
We were very happy…
So in love with each other..
But two years ago….
We were suppose to celebrate our first year anniversary…
And we decided we will meet at the first place we first met.
But what happened never crossed my mind.
He broke my heart..
He told me that what we had is nothing…
That I was just a pass time for him..
He said he found someone better…
And I should find someone that suits me…
My world crashed that day…
A year after ….... he broke my heart...
My feet brought me back to the station…
I don’t know why….
I sighed….and stop …
The memory is still so clear.
I can still remember his adorable smile.
Waving that big sign board across the street.
Showing me those puppy eyes.
Those smiling eyes that made my heart blinded from other men.
He proposed to me that day.
Passers by wondered what this fellow is doing….
I turned scarlet red when they realized it.
But my shyness vanished when he approach me.
My eyes focused only to him.
My heart danced with the rhythm of its beat.
My tears never stopped to flow.
His the only person who could only swept me off my feet.
No matter how he hurt me.
My heart never seized to love him.
Though I understand why he did that.
Still I can’t help myself not to get hurt.
But my love is far greater…
“Why!!!!?”
I let out a scream.
If I don’t , my heart might explode.
“Why Jiyong! Why?!”
I remove his ring from my finger.
I kept it , together with mine.
Then throw it.
Creating a tiny clinking sound..
As my tears continued to flow.
I fell on my knees.
As the ring shines…..
In Jiyong’s grave …….
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a/n: Thank you for reading. Sorry for the typos....
**Wahhh! My Heart!! Wahh!**
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