Your POV


I was sitting in my bed after another therapy, drawing some sketches when Seunghyun walked in. It has been 2 days since I last talked to him and he looked really tired.

I signed them. He sighed walking over to me and passing the divorce papers.

Thank you. I said with a joyful smile on my lips. I knew he will be smart enough to do what I said.

You look better. The bruises are gone and you finally have some color in your cheeks. How are you feeling? he smiled at me and I wondered what got into him. He never talked to me like that.

Oh, I am doing well. Progressing fast as the doctor said. I'll be out of here in no time. I said putting my sketch book away.

By the way, you stated I can keep the house, but you can live there if you want. I am sure you won't feel bothered by me, the house is big enough.

What do you mean? Won't you live with Hwa young anymore? I asked curiously.

I need some time off, besides I am busy with promotions, so I moved back in our home.

Our home. He said it like it was the happiest place where to be.
 

I don't think I will live there. I'll be moving somewhere else. I only ask of you to keep the paintings safe. I'll come after them someday. I asked and he just sadly smiled.

So you're leaving, huh? Seunghyun asked looking at me. God, I can't believe this is happening. Are you really going to leave me all alone? Never call or write?

Well, I don't think I will do that in the closest time. I murmured as he sighed.

It's just that... I am reading your diary and it makes me realise how unfairly I have mistretated you, blaming you for things you have never done. And I want to fix it. I want us to be friends again.

Maybe, Seunghyun, maybe one day, but don't ask me now. You must understand what I have been through. I just can't go back...it's not that simple. I murmured

He looked disappointed as he got up. I hope you don't dissapear forever. I couldn't take that, ____-ah, cause no matter what happened between us and how we lived our lives, I still need you in my life. It just won't be the same without you.

I kept silent, looking out the window as I heard him leave.

It won't be the same without you too, Seunghyun. Maybe it will be even better. I whispered as I picked up my sketch book once again.

Tabi's POV

A week later I finally got  free time so I decided to visit _____. I was getting ready to leave YGE, when I ran into Daesung, who just got back from his last musical act this season.

Oh, hyung, where are you going? He asked smiling at me.

I pulled myself together, trying not to think of the painting and his note and keep calm. Daesung was still my friend for years, I shouldn't be like this.

I am going to visit _____. I smiled back at him as he looked at me with a puzzled expression.

Oh, hyung,I thought she told you. Aish, that stubborn girl... you see, she's out of the hospital already.  She got out 2 days ago. I was there to pick her up. Daesung explained as I felt anger boiling up inside me.

I didn't know. Where is she now? I need to talk to her about the divorce.
 

Well I can't tell you where she is, I made a promise, but I'll let her know you're looking for her, she will contact you. Daesung said in an apologetic tone as he began to walk down the hall. Hyung, I gotta go now. I guess I'll see you later.

I can't tell you where she is. I mimicked his nasal voice when he walked around the corner. You little , I will get back at you for this. I hissed, briskly walking to the car and driving home.

There on the counter I found a letter. It was from ______.

Seunghyun, sorry for leaving like this, without even saying a proper good bye. First of all, I wanted to tell you that how you announce our divorce to public is your concern. Though, I suggest the easiest way would be to blame it on me and my post-traumatic depression or something. You choose. About Uncle and auntie. I already talked to them. They were really upset, but they will accept it with time. I asked them not to disturb you, since I know you're busy.
And please don't look for me. I will come around when I feel it's the right time. I hope you live a good life and be nice to Hwa young. Don't hurt her like you hurt me. I wish you all the best.

______

I crumpled the letter, throwing it against the wall. So she sneaked in, while I was working, left this letter and ran off? I went to her bedroom, only to see an empty closet, all her jewelry was gone too. She took everything.

Where did you go, _____? I asked out loudly standing in the vast room, that still held the vague memory of her presence.

.

One month later.

I was at Hwa Young's place, hecking out all the fan 'wars' and dissucions about my divorce. Most of the we're about how they really liked _____ and how sad it is we broke up. I sighed closing my laptop shut.

You seem so bothered lately. Is the divorce issue getting to you? Hwa young asked, passing me a hot cup of tea,  taken a seat next to me.

Don't be upset, oppa, you have me. And it's not like you loved her. She continued as I sipped my tea.

I mistreated her, Hwa young, I feel bad about it. I only now begin to realise I actually miss her... I answered as she looked at me angrily.

Yah, do you like her now? Do you regret being with me? she pouted as I sighed. Lately she was getting so clingy and pushy, always throwin tantrums about _____. She wasn't like that before.

Stop it. I harshly spoke, getting up. I am not in the mood for another fight with you. I groaned as she stomped away to her bedroom, shutting the door behind her loudly.

And again, you're acting like a child, Hwa young! I yelled out, picking up my stuff. I'd rather go to the studio and hang out with Jiyong and Youngbae.

I walked inside, greeting the boys with a blunt hello and sat on the sofa, listening to the latest beats Jiyong had come up with. I checked my phone, placing it on the table infront of me.

Still nothing? Youngbae asked, twirling in his chair.

No. I answered. _____ hadn't contacted me for a month and I felt out of place.

It's actually kind of funny. You used to ignore most of her calls and now you're sitting here like a beaten puppy, silently hoping she will call. Youngbae grinned and I threw a pillow at him.

Ha ha, very funny, Bae.  I hissed

But honestly speaking, I do miss her. I miss her random messages and calls. How she would show up here with lunch box for us all. I kind of miss it all. I was used to it and it annoyed me. I can't believe I miss being annoyed by her. I spoke, rubbing my eyes. Lately I wasn't sleeping well.

I bet you 10 bucks I know something you don't. Jiyong announced finally getting off the computer.

Alright, what is it? I asked not realy amused by his cocky expression.

I heard Daesung talking on the phone with her this morning. As I could guess from the conversation she's doing much better than you do. He stuck his toungue out at me.

Great. Just great. Lovely, it really is!! I sarcastically said, getting irritated by the fact Daesung could contact her so easily.

Alright, let's stop talking about it, or you'll lose your . Youngbae said, getting up from his seat. What are you guys planning to do? We have 3 days off now.

Oh, I'll go visit my mom. Jiyong said It's been a while since I last saw her.

I will probably stay home. I mumbled.

I should probably get back to reading her diary. I haven't done that in ages.

I see. Well, I'll be hanging out in Seoul, so Seunghyun, if you feel like going out, call me up! Youngbae said, before grabbing his backpack and heading off.

Back to business, hyung. Jiyong seriously said Listen to this track. I was thinking about making it into a song for our 2nd GD&TOP album. Think about what you cold sing in the lyrics. he added pressing the play buton, letting a slow, yet rythmic melody fill the studio.

Okay, I have something on my mind already. I spoke after the track ended. I'll let you know when I have something written.

I got up ready to leave when Jiyong's voice stopped me.

Don't kill yourself over her departure. You should be glad she's happy. And I think you should let her go. She suffered enough, don't chase her, just let her be.

I left without answering, Jiyong's words still repeating in my head.