Donghae was left dumbfounded at the stairs with zero elucidation spoken by his boyfriend. His mouth created a small gap as he gaped at the door that was loudly banged by the boy. He could not intuit the reason of Eunhyuk’s unexpected outburst. The abrupt situation made Donghae stay rooted on the stair for a few minutes.

In the meantime, Eunhyuk leaned against the door of his room. He was truthfully hurt with Donghae’s careless behaviors this time. He knew that he ought to understand his lover but things happened too fast and Donghae had slipped too far for him to consider everything this moment. Thanks to Donghae’s heedlessness, a distrust feeling just born in him.

Eventually, Donghae was able to register everything in his mind and move his legs as quick in his hasty manner as he could to the threshold of Eunhyuk’s room. He raised his balled fist and gave the door a series of knockings. He was worried. He kept calling out for Eunhyuk but the other boy was not replying.

“Hyukjae-ah. Please, listen to me,” Donghae pleaded, fist still rapping.

“Just go away, Hae! There's nothing I should hear from you!” Eunhyuk hollered from behind the door, yet the shout succeeded in tunneling a hole into Donghae’s heart.

Donghae drew in a sharp painful breath and tapped his knuckles on the door again. He attempted in giving explanation. All that he received was a few steady shouts from Eunhyuk, conveying how deeply upset Eunhyuk was. He was perhaps too mad to let any enlightenment from Donghae reached his ears. Donghae ultimately stopped knocking.

He thought this might not be the right time to say anything. He decided to let Eunhyuk have some time to calm down. Even though, right in his heart, he very much wanted to lean down, look into Eunhyuk’s eyes and say how extremely sorry he was. He still did not grab the situation yet but plausibly, he was sure a simple ‘I’m sorry.’ could at least fix something.

Donghae placed his ear on the surface of the door and sealed his eyes close. He could still catch the vague sounds of rushing breathings of his boyfriend behind the wood. He knew Eunhyuk was still there. He slowly dropped on his knees wobbly on the floor and bent down. As his buttocks were high in the air, he laced his head with the cold floor and looked at the silhouette of Eunhyuk through the sliver between the door and the floor. He in a breath and gathered up the entire courage left in his body. (He wondered why he needed that too, though.)

“I’m sorry,” He whispered, adequately perceptible for both of them to hear.

Presently trying to complete his homework in his room, Donghae could do nothing more than staring in space and thinking about Eunhyuk. He was worried of the boy. As he tapped his finger on his chin, he was sure Eunhyuk must have mistaken the silly calling for something. He really loved Eunhyuk, he was absolutely sure of that. That was a fact that nobody could ever change.

“Yes, I do love him. I’ve never felt this happy with someone. This man had made me fall in love with him, probably deeper than it was to Jaehyuk,” Donghae muttered.

Thinking about this, now, he was confused with his own feelings. It was too subjective to speak out how he felt towards Eunhyuk. However, one thing for sure, and the very single thing that was certain of was, he loved Eunhyuk for being Eunhyuk. He loved the boy as he was, not because of the replacement for Jaehyuk or something like that. After being through a lot of questioning in his mind, Donghae was really tired that he barely able to think at that moment.

“Is it? I thought you love that black coffee so much. You always order that when we are here, Jae.”

“Where’s the scar on your back that you used to have?”

“Here it is! Your favourite scrambled egg, Jae.”

Now, he realized every mistake he had slipped when he was with Eunhyuk. Every scene flashed in his mind and he felt extremely bad to Eunhyuk. He reached for his phone and dialed Eunhyuk’s number. He waited patiently for any answer and as expected, the other boy did not pick up his phone. He bit his lower lip as he called again and waited. He waited and waited tolerantly.

“Eunhyuk, everything is not as what you think. Please, at least, listen to what I’m going to say. Meet me at school tomorrow. Okay? I’ll wait for you,” Donghae said.

Donghae put his phone aside after making the voice-mail. He sighed again. He needed to explain everything; every single thing. He loved Eunhyuk and he could not stand being like this in their relationship. He, at last, made his inner-self decision; he would appreciate Eunhyuk as he was. Jaehyuk was his past and God had replaced someone better for him. He admitted everything now; they were his own stupid mistakes. He closed his eyes and hugged his pillow.

He would end this fight tomorrow.

“Eunhyuk-ah, did you complete your Math homework?” Donghae asked eagerly, craning at the apathetic boy.

Eunhyuk was diligently doing his Korean essay, writing each word neatly. He completely ignored Donghae’s inquiry and continued pouring all the ideas being produced in his mind onto the piece of single-lined paper. Donghae palmed Eunhyuk’s shoulder, still stretching his neck to satisfy his curiousness over the writing Eunhyuk was doing.

“What?” Eunhyuk asked, sounding really annoyed.

“No, I was just -” Donghae’s word halted as his eyes met with the intimidating eyes of Eunhyuk. “- checking out your essay. It’s good,” He continued, clearing his throat later to cover his embarrassed self.

Donghae was kind of taken aback with Eunhyuk’s responds to his queries and acts. They proved how hurt Eunhyuk was with him. He did not like this situation. He could not stand being the wrong one and never able to redeem himself with his explanation. In a small fraction of his brain, he felt like punching in that monkey’s face straightly. Someway, he thought Eunhyuk should at least listen to what he was going to say.

 He had tried to grab Eunhyuk when the boy was walking to try to talk to him but failed. Eunhyuk just shrugged Donghae’s hands that were on his shoulders and walked away. He seemed not interested at all. (This made Donghae almost blow his face.) Donghae could not tolerate any longer. He composed a plan in his mind and decided to run his plan soon.

When they were in the Biology class, they had went to the Biology laboratory to do some sort of experiments. Everyone could see that Donghae was not paying attention or just stood from behind when his group was setting up the experiment. No one said anything, though, as Donghae never liked Biology.

“Don’t forget to complete your papers, okay!” The Biology teacher reminded as she gathered up her files after their class session ended.

The students paced out of the laboratory - some were chatting, some were playing around, some were quickly paving their way to the class. Eunhyuk was alone and he was walking wordlessly to the class. Donghae believed that this was his chance. He immediately ran to the boy and seized his arm.

“Donghae! Let me go,” Eunhyuk yelled, struggling to pull his arm.

Donghae ignored the complaints and whines that Eunhyuk was making at his side and kept dragging the boy. At the same time, Eunhyuk tried to pry his arm away from the tight grip. The other students were surprised to see the sudden scene. Some were yelling at Donghae and asking what was wrong with him.

“Tell the teacher that we have to meet the principle for a while!” Donghae answered, a little breathlessly.

Donghae forcefully dragged Eunhyuk to a specific direction (which stupidly was not the path to the Principal’s office.) and deafened his ears of the complaints. He let every word that came out of Eunhyuk’s mouth passed through his ears and out. Eunhyuk grunted and yelled at Donghae to let him go.

“Where are you bringing me to? Let me go!” Eunhyuk yelled.

Donghae deafened his ears.

“I don’t want any explanation from you. Let me go now, Hae! I don’t want to listen to anything right now!” Eunhyuk yelled again.

Donghae still deafened his ears.

“I hate you, Donghae!” Eunhyuk shouted with his voice as high as his fury at that moment.

Donghae did not know how that line succeeded to pass his ears and stuck itself in his mind. It was so hurtful and upsetting to hear those words came out of Eunhyuk. He sensed small tears growing in his eyes but he blinked them away. He stopped right there because he was hurt with Eunhyuk’s word and he was not sure if he could take any hatred words from Eunhyuk, if they kept going. Fortunately, no one was passing there. Strategically, it was behind the store room. A very strategic place, he thought to himself.

Eunhyuk refused to stay and turned the ball of his heels to leave the silent place. Nonetheless, Donghae made a quick move and engulfed Eunhyuk into his warm embrace. It was so homely that the entire cold interactions between them were forgotten.

With just one warm hug, Eunhyuk stopped objecting and unquestionably melted in the hug.

Still, regardless of how warm and comforting the hug was, he was still hurt and upset with the way he was formerly treated by Donghae. He abruptly pushed the body glued to him away. The next second, he started to shout as if he never liked Donghae in the first place.

“Get away from me, Donghae! Stop pretending! I’m tired, really sick with all of this drama! Eunhyuk shouted, eyes enlarged and face was red.

Donghae was flabbergasted to hear such things out of Eunhyuk. He breathed in to start his explanation despite his bleeding heart.

“But... I –I was confuse but now, ” Donghae muttered.

“Shut up!” Eunhyuk hollered with a really high volume to Donghae.

If Donghae was a girl, he, in all probability, would be crying at that time. Nevertheless, as a man, even though being shouted by his boyfriend, he endeavored in swallowing every word from Eunhyuk. It hurt him, still. In no time, his eyes began to create clear glasses in them.

Donghae grabbed Eunhyuk’s wrists and tried very hard to hold the boy down. He quickly leaned in and pressed his lips against the thicker ones. Eunhyuk was certainly surprised but he never retreated or refused the kiss. Donghae took this as a big chance and kissed the boy. He kissed him again and again, in hoping that Eunhyuk would be silent for a while and let him talk. However, Eunhyuk, who was oblivious of the tears and still in rage, started to detonate himself again. He was endlessly livid as he pushed Donghae away.

“I don’t want to hear anything from you. Do you know how it felt like to be love as someone else, when you sincerely love that person? Do you know how hurtful it is when you love someone so much with all of your heart, yet he was still having someone else in his heart? It hurts, Donghae. It hurts. It’s really hurt to be in relationship with you when you actually love your ex-boyfriend in your heart. I know it, that we shouldn’t meet in the first place. This is the hugest mistake that ever happened to me!”

Eunhyuk’s throat was sore after shouting at his boyfriend. He had let it all out and he was still hurting in his heart. He did not know why. He thought it would feel better after letting all the whole feelings that he bottled in himself but it did not. He heaved a sigh out of disappointment. He did not expect for this to come, though. He was upset with the state their relationship was in at that moment.

He hated the fact that the love feeling towards Donghae was still strong as ever.

Eunhyuk was confused. He looked up at Donghae’s visage and was a little surprised to notice the trails of tears that wetted the cheeks. He heard a faint sniff from the boy and a few slow and heavy dragging steps. By then, he realized that Donghae was already standing shakily near him. Eunhyuk did not want to talk at that moment; he was so entangled in his own words.

He, then, made a move from the place because he could not look at Donghae's tears, moreover, when he was the reason that the tears fell. That hurt him even more to know he was the reason Donghae was crying. He just left without a word. He kept moving his legs as fast as he could. He was winded as he turned around a corner, concealing himself from Donghae’s sight.

 ‘What am I doing? What are you doing, Eunhyuk?’  He thought. He heard Donghae’s shouts from afar and he knew really well that the boy would not able to find him there. Donghae, who was left there alone, without any more word than all those hurtful ones, had fallen to his knees. His plan had failed and he was sure Eunhyuk would not listen to him anymore.

“You’re stupid, you know?” A stranger voiced from his back.

Eunhyuk turned around to find an unrecognizable student leaning against the wall just a few meters from him. He quickly stood up properly and dusted his blazer. A mocking chuckle came out of the student which made Eunhyuk to land his eyes on him again. Simultaneously, his eyes caught the word on the nametag attached on the blazer.

‘KIBUM’

“Who are you?” Eunhyuk asked, knowing he should say something since the stranger just called him a ‘stupid’.

“Can’t you read the name on this tag?” The stranger asked, purposely lighting a flame in Eunhyuk.

Eunhyuk looked away with an irritated look on his face and snorted. He did not know this man and out of the blue, the man was trying to provoke him. Things are hectic in mind and he did not think he had the time to argue with an unknown person.

“I’m not going to take much of your time. I think… you should just leave Donghae. You’re nothing to him. It’s obvious that he looks at you as Jaehyuk all of this time. You may don’t get my point so let me enlighten everything to your tiny brain. Donghae had been lonely for almost two years, dude. Two years since the death of his ex-boyfriend. I’m pretty sure you know the cause of his death. An accident, if you’re that oblivious. It was a tragic one to Donghae.” Kibum said.

“Who are you? How do you know about this?” Eunhyuk asked as he felt his heart burning up.

“Donghae was absent from school for about a fortnight. He was like a and traumatized. It took nearly a year for him to completely, well, I’m not sure he’s totally over it but he’s better than before. And then, you came into this school and ruined everything. Having an exact copy of Jaehyuk’s face, don’t you think that’s too much for him? For God’s sake, leave him alone. Both of you are not making anything better.”  Kibum said, pacing a tad closer to Eunhyuk.

Eunhyuk was frozen on his spot. His sweaty hands were glued on his sides as the threads of words entered his ears. His mind was running way too fast. Everything seemed to be fitting in the jigsaw puzzle that he had been wondering about since he met Donghae.  Kibum looked and him and was about to open his mouth to speak again but suddenly, Eunhyuk seemed not to be in the mood to listen to anything at that moment. He casually excused himself from the place.

“Yah, stupid! I haven’t finished talking to you!” Kibum yelled.

Eunhyuk just walked away and left the guy alone. He was actually still in shock of what Kibum just told him. Every word from the guy stuck in his mind and eventually, made him think back about the truth behind the talk. He needed some fresh air at the moment to clear his messed mind. He wanted to be alone and thought about everything up.

“Did I actually make Donghae suffer, instead of bringing happiness to him? Is it my mistake that this entire situation happens? Am I being too hard on him? My, it’s me. Not him. It’s my entire fault. I was being childish and immature.” Eunhyuk began to question himself and started to believe of the answer.

It was my entire fault, he thought.

Days had passed after the shouts incident and his unexpected meeting with Kibum. However, things still were not fine with Eunhyuk and Donghae.  Eunhyuk had made up his thought of not being close to Donghae for a while, or might be forever. He was pretty sure he would just ended up saddening the boy more and that would hurt him.

If you love someone, let it go. If it comes back to you, then it’s yours. (This is actually Donghae’s quote)

Eunhyuk still remember the line from one of the romance novels that he read in his odds times. He was not the type to read such thing, but sometimes, situation made him to do so. He had decided to let Donghae go because he loved him. He knew that being with Donghae would just make the boy upset and continuously live in his past. He wanted Donghae to move forward. He wanted Donghae to be happy and he was sure he was not the one to make it happen.

“Eunhyuk!” Donghae called him from behind.

Currently, they were in the bookstore that Donghae worked at. Eunhyuk slowly turned around and simply looked at the boy. He admitted he missed the boy dearly so much but he could not help but to comply with the situation. If he be with Donghae, he was just making things worse. He wanted the best for his boyfriend. Boyfriend. Even that sounded so wrong to his ears now.

“Yes?” Eunhyuk replied casually, like nothing ever happened to them.

He could see that Donghae flinched a little with his reply. Donghae somehow managed to cover from his shock pretty quicker than Eunhyuk thought. He could sense the awkwardness growing around them and how Donghae tried to smile as casual as he could. The boy was trying to play with Eunhyuk’s game and be casual too. One thing Eunhyuk never knew, his ‘casual’ acts were just hurting Donghae even more.

“Why you… I mean, do you need any help?” Donghae asked.

After the shouts incident, Donghae knew he should not push Eunhyuk too much or else he would just hurt his own feelings later. Maybe he needs some more time, Donghae thought as he looked into Eunhyuk’s eyes. The eyes were empty of any feeling. The pretty eyes were just glassy.

Does this mean Eunhyuk was wordlessly breaking up with me, Donghae thought.

“No,” Eunhyuk replied and twitched a small smile.

Donghae was taken aback and he could literally feel the huge lump in his throat. He bit his tongue as he tried to hold on his incoming tears.  He needed to get away as he smiled back unfeelingly. Donghae bowed like a good worker he was and turned the ball of his heels. He walked away from the brown-haired boy. His intention of slowly making up completely destroyed. He felt utterly hopeless about their relationship now.

After minutes searching for the new workbook he needed for his History lesson and grabbing a few stationeries he would be needed for school, Eunhyuk paid at the counter, completely ignoring his boyfriend standing near the shelf next to the counter. He quickly walked out of the bookstore and into the car, where his chauffer was waiting. He was not sure of his decision right now. He loved Donghae but he did not want to hurt the boy.

Meanwhile, Kibum, who had been walking around outside the bookstore since he saw Eunhyuk in the bookstore, took this as a huge chance and entered the bookstore. He smiled at Donghae on the first step he took into the bookstore. Donghae was a little cheered when he saw his other classmate came at his place. He speedily walked to Kibum.

“Hi, Kibum. Do you need any help?” Donghae asked.

“Donghae, next time, why don’t you bring your entire class here?” Nana mocked him as she dusted the counter.

“I’m looking for the History workbook Mr. Chen asked us to buy,” Kibum said with his sweet smile.

“Oh, sure! This way, Kibum.”

“Okay.”

Kibum smirked as Donghae lead the way to the History section. His plan had run smoothly and had gone really well, even faster than he predicted. This was what he exactly wanted. He had always desired to get Eunhyuk away from Donghae. He knew his idea of taking advantage of their critical situation was the best. Few years ago, he never had the chance to make Donghae fall for him because of Jaehyuk’s existence. Now that Eunhyuk, who happened to have the same face as Jaehyuk, appeared, he knew he had to get rid of the brown-haired boy too.

The greatest parasite is gone, Kibum thought.

You may kick our asses for not updating. Applause! Happy New Year to you guys and Happy Birthday to Sungmin (one day earlier). Haha..

(credit to blueprincez for the chapter image)