note. read at your own risk (mentions of panic attack, and losing a loved one)

 

 

 

Iloilo Day 1

 

 

 

Nakarating sila Joohyun sa resort na tutuluyan nila, sinalubong sila ng isang staff of the resort sa main gate.

 

 

 

“Good morning po ma’am” bati nito

 

 

 

“Good morning” tugon nilang apat

 

 

 

“May dalawang rooms nalang po na available” Nagkatinginan silang apat, Joohyun knows that Jennie and Lisa would room together, given na yun kasi mag jowa sila. But Joohyun’s other option is to room with Seulgi

 

 

 

“Is it fine if magkasama kayo ni Seulgi sa isang room-” Lisa wasn’t finished when Jennie cut her off

 

 

 

“Babe, i think i should just room with Joohy-” Seulgi also didn’t let Jennie finish

 

 

 

“No, you guys can share a room, kailangan niyo din ng alone time” Shock was evident on Joohyun’s face, ano ba kasing trip nitong ex niya at gusto pa atang share sila ng room.

 

 

 

“Okay lang ba sa’yo direk?” Joohyun still didn’t recover from shock and she just nodded without saying anything.

 

 

 

“Okay then…..We’ll go ahead na” Lisa replied, Jennie looked back at Joohyun worriedly, Nakita ni Joohyun na kakalabitin sana ng kaibigan ang jowa upang kausapin pero tumango nalang si Joohyun sakanya and smiled, reassuring her.

 

 

 

“Tara?” Seulgi raised the key card and smiled at her. Siya na din ang nagbuhat ng bagahe ni Joohyun.

 

 

 

Hindi nagsalita si Joohyun habang naglalakad sila, napansin niya din na sa kabilang gawi naglakad sila Jennie at mukhang magkalayo ang mga kwarto nila.

 

 

 

She knows she couldn’t stand being alone with Seulgi in a single room, pero wala naman siyang magagawa, nandito na sila eh.

 

 

 

“What was that?” As soon as Joohyun closed the door she glared at Seulgi who’s putting down her luggage gently on the floor.

 

 

 

“What was what?”

 

 

 

“You know exactly what i mean, Kang Seulgi” Seulgi looked away, She sat gently on the king size bed……..A KING SIZE BED.

 

 

 

Hindi na mabilang ang mura ni Joohyun sa isip, they had to share the same bed.

 

 

 

“Look Joohyun…..I know i hurt you”

 

 

 

Here we go again…

 

 

 

“I won’t say it, I know you don’t want to hear it anymore”

 

 

 

“But please let me show you how sorry iam, let me make it up to you”

 

 

 

—-

 

 

 

Hindi na sila nagusap ni Seulgi pagkatapos noong kanina, She didn’t even spare her a look noong nagaayos sila ng mga gamit.

 

 

 

Now they are walking papuntang main lobby para maglunch with silence engulfing them.

 

 

 

“About earlier…” Seulgi started.

 

 

 

Joohyun stopped walking “Just don’t be around me that much”

 

 

 

Seulgi smiled to herself.

 

 

 

Joohyun felt her phone vibrate from her pocket so she reached out to see who texted her.

 

 

 

Jennie

Joo, sorry. I know you hate it when i tell someone something about you without asking you first, but Lisa had to know, I know how uncomfortable you are with Seulgi. She said siya nalang daw muna sasama kay Seulgi and you can room with me.

 

 

 

You

Okay lang Jen. And okay na din ako to room with her, don’t worry too much.

 

 

 

Jennie

What made you change your mind? Thats unlikely 

 

 

You

I want to talk to her, I want to ask questions, maybe i’ll be at peace if she gives me answers

 

 

 

After sending the message Joohyun puts her phone back in her pocket.

 

 

 

It didn’t take long para makarating tila sa lobby and saw two empty seats in front of their Friends.

 

 

 

The table was quiet when they sat down, Joohyun saw Lisa looking at her worriedly. She smiled at her to let know it’s fine.

 

 

 

“Seulgi samahan mo nga ako mag-order” 

 

 

 

“Ha?” Seulgi looked puzzled noong tumayo bigla si Jennie at tinawag siya, Pinanlakihan siya ng mata ni Jennie so she hurriedly stood up at sumunod sa kanya papuntang counter.

 

 

 

Joohyun and Lisa were the one left on the table, Joohyun’s touching the tip of the fork on their table to keep herself from thinking too much.

 

 

 

“I’m so sorry…..hindi ko alam” She looked at Lisa who was apologizing

 

 

 

She smiled softly at the younger one “Okay lang”

 

 

 

“Jennie told me what happened” Lisa paused “Now I’m also getting scared, na baka humantong kami sa ganyan”

 

 

 

“I don’t think so….I’ve known you and Jennie for a long time, And what you guys have was far from what we had” Joohyun remarks

 

 

 

“A lot of problems were overlooked….” 

 

 

 

“Do you think she’s ready?”

 

 

 

“I can’t answer that….” Joohyun pats her shoulder “But i know that she will always say yes to you….She always does” It’s true naman, Joohyun knows Lisa is always a part of Jennie’s future plans, every decision her friend makes palaging considered si Lisa.

 

 

 

That’s what they lacked off…That’s what Seulgi lacked off.

 

 

 

“Eh ikaw? Are you ready? Are you sure” Joohyun asked her

 

 

 

“Always, Joohyun. It’s Jennie, she has always been my sure thing”

 

 

 

a peek to the overlooked problems

 

 

 

"Late ka nanaman" Puna ni Joohyun kay Seulgi na ngayon lang siya sinundo.

 

 

 

"Sorry, Nakalimutan ko eh. I lost track of time"

 

 

 

"Lagi naman..." Joohyun didn't wait na buksan nito ang car door at siya na mismo ang nagbukas para sa sarili niya

 

 

 

Pumasok kaagad si Seulgi sa drivers seat. She was late for an hour, nakalimutan niyang she promised to take Joohyun out on a dinner after ng work nito.

 

 

 

The car ride to the restaurant was quiet, The silence was suffocating.

 

 

 

"Sorry ma'am, puno na po right now yung restaurant. May reservation po ba kayo?" Tanong nung waiter.

 

 

 

"I forgot to make a reservation....How long is the line?" Seulgi asked

 

 

 

"Uwi nalang tayo" Seulgi looked at Joohyun who's clearly not in the mood, she failed her again.

 

 

 

They were inside the car again but Seulgi didn't drive yet, Joohyun was trying to divert her attention sa ibang bagay to stop herself from crying, she expected so much from Seulgi and it hurts kasi umasa siya na this night will go well, na finally after ng pagiging busy ni Seulgi babawi na din sakanya ito.

 

 

 

But she was wrong. 

 

 

 

Seulgi sensed the tension, so she slowly held Joohyun's hand and planted soft kisses on it. 

 

 

 

"I'm sorry....Things had just been so tough lately and my mind is all over the place" Joohyun's tears started to fall.

 

 

 

"I hope you don't get tired of me.....I don't know what to do anymore if i'll lose you too.....I'm sorry" Seulgi cried softly

 

 

 

"Okay lang...." Joohyun whispered and leans in to hug her.

 

 

 

Joohyun is weak when Seulgi cries, because Seulgi rarely does that, sakanilang dalawa siya ang madalas na umiiyak. Even if Seulgi fails a test hindi ito umiiyak, palagi lang nakatulala, and Joohyun rarely sees this side of Seulgi.

 

 

 

"Gusto mo bang pagusapan natin? Para matulungan kita?" Joohyun knows na Seulgi is failing her classes dahil sa family problems nito.

 

 

 

"Tapsilog nalang tayo?" Seulgi said not minding what Joohyun asked, she avoided talking about it.

 

 

 

---

 

 

 

Seulgi's washing the dishes when Joohyun came home from work, Joohyun wasn't surprised to see her ever though she thought she's busy. Jaehyun called her earlier to tell her Seulgi's acting different lately.

 

 

 

"Jaehyun called me, lagi ka daw nagiinom and palagi ka daw tulala" Joohyun hugged her from behind, Seulgi was a little startled but she sure do loves backhugs so she calms down kaagad.

 

 

 

"Okay lang ako...."

 

 

 

"You do know na just like how you help me with my fights, I'll also do the same to you, I'm always here to help you"

 

 

 

"Okay lang ako, kaya ko 'to"

 

 

 

"Okay"

 

 

 

Joohyun doesn't know what to do anymore, She's been with Seulgi for a year already yet she doesn't know much about her....She doesn't know what she's going through or what makes her act differently this days. Seulgi's like a closed book not wanting to be opened, Joohyun isn't the key either. She tried so many times but she always fail to.

 

 

 

“Am I just a temporary commitment to you?” Joohyun’s question made Seulgi drop the plate on the sink. Joohyun removes her arms around her as Seulgi faced her.

 

 

 

“Bakit mo naman naisip yan?” Seulgi replied while wiping hands with a towel

 

 

 

“Ewan, i just feel like you don’t have any future plans with me...parang you don't want to let me in” 

 

 

 

“Did Chanyeol say something nanaman sayo?”

 

 

 

"Ha? This isn't about Chanyeol"

 

 

 

"Then why are you being like this?"

 

 

 

"Being what? Is it wrong to ask?" Joohyun started to get mad

 

 

 

Seulgi sighed while trying to stop her tears from falling

 

 

 

"Please Joohyun wag ngayon"

 

 

 

Joohyun saw how Seulgi's body started to shake, she's having a panic attack.

 

 

 

"Hey......it's alright" Joohyun went close to her and held her hand "I'm here, calm down"

 

 

 

Seulgi hugs Joohyun and hides her face on the smaller one's shoulders.

 

 

 

"What happened?" Joohyun asks her softly while the youngers hair. 

 

 

 

"Dad is gone"

 

 

 

"Ha? Kailan?" Joohyun was surprised but she calmed herself down kaagad because she didn't want Seulgi to panic more.

 

 

 

"Two weeks ago...." Seulgi continued crying.

 

 

 

Two weeks ago....yet Joohyun didn't know about it.

 

 

 

She felt guilty not being there for her...

 

 

 

"Does your friends know?" 

 

 

 

"Some of them found out"

 

 

 

Joohyun felt so little at that time.....Seulgi's friends knew but she didn't.

 

 

 

She felt unimportant because Seulgi didn't tell her.

 

 

 

"Bakit hindi mo kaagad sinabi saakin? May balak ka bang sabihin?" Joohyun asked her, pain evident in her voice. She didn't sound mad but sad instead.

 

 

 

"I didn't want to burden you, I know your also going through something" 

 

 

 

"You should've told me"

 

 

 

"I'm sorry" Joohyun hugged her closer

 

 

 

"Okay lang" Joohyun replies with her tears falling down

 

 

 

"Promise me, na sa susunod magsasabi ka na"

 

 

 

"I promise"

 

 

 

note.

hello hehe super busy talaga and i get writers block...day1 in iloilo will continue next update, let me know what you think on the comsec. 

(i didn't proof read this yet so i might make changes if ever macheck ko na, thank you)