It has begun again, my friend.

In your heart, we are nothing but strangers in the end.

Gentle drip drops of the rain fell against the glass of the car’s windows, serving as a sweet ambiance, however, a strong contrast to the heavy silence pressing down on Baekhyun and Soon-ok's shoulders. The last words the two had exchanged had been in the empty office. Who could've ever guessed that the Byun Baekhyun and Park Soon-ok would ever be sitting in the same car, oddly enough, shrouded in silence rather than snarky remarks and childish banter? 

It was the loud ding from her phone, signaling about a new text message that shattered their train of thought. Soon-ok fished it quickly up, happy to have something to distract herself with. However, the name on the display was one that easily pulled at her heartstrings in the most painful of ways. Her chest constricted as she hesitantly pressed on the notification.

It’s over between us

seen, 07:00 am, 1 week ago

Fine by me

9:34 pm

The text was extremely disappointing as it prompted a heavy sigh to tumble from her lips, a big heave of her chest. And yet, her shaking orbs wouldn’t- couldn’t stop raking over the displayed sentence, as if hopeful that another sort of explanation was going to follow up. How foolish she felt for having had hope for even a second within her. He didn’t care about her, never did, and wasn’t going to, although the fruit of their love had bloomed inside of her belly.

 Love, huh? Perhaps, her one-sided love was a more correct way to portray it. She felt used, consumed to the deepest pit of her being.

Soon-ok wasn’t sure about what kind of answer she had expected, or more rightly said, hoped for. She wondered where she had managed to find that little crumb of hope stored within her when he had done nothing but crush her heart without giving a single scruple.

The girl didn’t say anything when the driving Baekhyun sent her a questioning glance from the rearview mirror. However, no insisting left his lips, nor did he waste his breath upon the matter when she showed no sign of acknowledgment. He was already doing more than necessary by giving her a ride home. What a nuisance, he thought. Just as the thought crossed his mind, it had become his phone’s turn to yell into the heavy silence. The name Jinhee obnoxiously appeared on the display. A roll of his eyes and Baekhyun only clicked his tongue upon seeing it, letting the call echo into the car. Somehow though, as it continued to ring, their silence only felt heavier. 

“Are you not going to answer?” Soon-ok had uttered before she had been able to stop herself, Baekhyun’s serious expression mixed with a hint of annoyment had sparked a certain curiosity towards who that name belonged to and why he was ignoring the call.

“Hmm,” Baekhyun let out a lazy, uninterested hum past his throat, his tone answering her question but without giving Soon-ok the satisfaction of a further explanation. She pouted and slumped back into her seat, unable to take her eyes off the male. She realized how she had done nothing for long months but despise him, though truly, she knew close to nothing about him. The new fact pierced her chest with an unfamiliar sensation, it was slightly painful, and yet she couldn’t place her finger on it, she couldn’t name it. It felt odd that he was always there when she was in difficult situations and now even knew about her pregnancy. But what did she know about him? It wasn’t a fair game, he was ahead of her.

While gently sinking into the comforting vibrations of the car seat, Soon-ok let her gaze wander across Baekhyun’s side profile. As the moonlight shaped and formed shadows playfully across the sharp jaw and slightly shrunken features, caressing the contrasting soft and gentle eyes that reflected the starry sky. It was safe to say that Baekhyun, with his personality, completely wasted those pretty aspects of his face. Though, she concluded that when he wasn’t moving his foul mouth, he might look kind of okay. 

Soon-ok was being careless because Baekhyun clearly felt her burning stare raking over his figure as if a scanning laser was shooting from her orbs. The man wasted no time in cocking a small smirk while keeping his eyes on the road.

“What are you staring at?” He said mockingly and the woman only rolled her eyes, not the least surprised by his antics.

“Your ugly face,” She deadpanned, earning the upper hand in the conversation the moment Baekhyun’s smirk dissipated within milliseconds at her retort, instead, being replaced with an angry frown twisting at his rosy lips.

“ off, I’m leaving you in the middle of this road.” He had growled, his voice suddenly dropping an octave lower as a shadow cast down his face, signaling danger. However, Soon-ok wasn’t done in hurting his already harmed ego.

“Do it.” She challenged, “I dare your tiny balls to do it.” To her surprise, Baekhyun did halt the car, looking at her with an icy glare. The muscles of his arms flexed tightly against his perfectly fitted button-up as he clenched his jaw and heaved deep sighs, the buttons of his shirt straining against his chest. “What the hell did you just say?!” Veins surfaced on his neck as he strained to keep his composure.

“Do you really want me to crush your ego once more?” Soon-ok couldn’t help the laugh that her words danced upon, doing nothing but turning Baekhyun’s view red. He had the nasties words threatening to spill from the tip of his tongue, but he reminded himself that she was a pregnant woman, and for some reason, it didn’t feel right to throw just whatever at her like he usually would’ve done. He sighed irritatedly. Baekhyun had no problem insulting her, but there was another being within her body and they were innocent.

“You surely have a lot of energy for someone who just vomited.” He settled with a simple retort, giving up on having to win the unofficial fight just this once.

Soon-ok clucked her tongue, soon a smile spread on her lips in satisfaction of her new victory. For some reason, Baekhyun’s eyes had unconsciously observed the subtle movements a little too attentively to his own liking. His mind pondered on the strands that had escaped her loose ponytail and the gentle redness surrounding her exhausted eyes. Baekhyun found himself in his bottom lip in thought.

A few minutes later, Soon-ok indicated the last direction to her apartment, prompting Baekhyun to twist the steering wheel, shifting the gears, without any issues understanding her. As he halted the car in front of her apartment complex, the male contemplated his next actions for a few seconds. Despite his urge to just drive away, Baekhyun had done the exact opposite of what his brain had repeatedly echoed in his head. It was like his body acted on its own when he went out of his seat to open Soon-ok’s door for her, making her lips bloom into a wide, somehow mocking smile.

“Oh? What’s this?” She chuckled sweetly whilst pleasantly surprised but also extremely happy that she had been pushing his buttons more than what she usually was capable of.

“Shut up.” Baekhuyun shut her down right away, hoping that the warmth pooling on his cheeks without his consent would just go away. It had no reason to be there. Despite himself, Baekhyun silently offered Soon-ok a strong arm to lean onto as she stepped out of his car. He could tell that her body was still weak, therefore he wasn’t trusting her to make it back into her home safely. Question marks were floating above the woman's head as she accepted his unusual help. She knew very well how Baekhyun wouldn’t go out of his way to do something he deemed unnecessary, and yet there he was, tending a hand to the person he was supposed to hate.

It felt so foreign to utter such words, but Soon-ok was genuine when she quietly muttered: “Thank you, for driving me home.” while leaning with her shoulder against the door frame. Baekhyun’s brows were furrowed into a serious expression as he gave a curt nod, his eyes raking slowly across her figure, the words “take care” dancing on the tip of his tongue, but he swallowed them back down and turned around to leave. The strange feeling that had been brewing in his chest had now started spreading and increasing, making him slightly breathless. He felt different, uncomfortable. His strongest competitor was changing and now there was something about her, in his eyes, that had shifted, touching an unconscious part of him that not even he knew existed.

The pregnant woman didn’t bother to turn on any lights as she dragged her overworked body to the bedroom, slumping on her bed right away. The scent of fabric softener and the gentle texture of her covers were by now the only things that could bring her any kind of slight comfort in the sorrow that chased her every evening. They reminded her of the goodnight kisses her mother would press on her forehead, the soft hugs and closeness when pressed to her parent’s hearts, that by now lived in another city a bit too far from her. 

Seojun’s face flashed before her eyes, his kind voice and curly locks that he always allowed her fingers to brush through, the euphoric smiles he would so often grace her with- she just couldn’t wrap her head around him. Around him leaving that was so abrupt, so unfair. He should have been laying right beside her, caressing her crown, strengthening her. He should have been running his large palm along her growing stomach, acknowledging his child. But no, she was by herself in the huge bed, shrouded in cold, dark loneliness. Left to bear the helpless sensation of her body changing without her being able to catch up, all alone. With her aching and growing s, daily sickness, and a bigger body she no longer could recognize. She hated it. But despite those things, there was one thing she was sure about, and that was that she wanted to keep this growing flower in her tummy, to show the world that she was stronger, stronger than any prejudice, than any breakup. This child was hers and hers only from the very moment he had decided that he wanted nothing to do with it. Therefore she was never going to acknowledge Seojun as her baby’s father.

***

The sun was all too bright early in the morning, breaking rocks with its summer heat as the cicadas sang loudly into the still air. It made Soon-ok extremely thankful and joyous over the conditioned air making her hair flow as soon as she stepped foot in the office, for she knew it would have been the end of her otherwise. Strangely enough, despite her sleepless night, her spirits were high on this new day as she skipped to her desk, immediately making herself comfortable on the chair. Though, it hadn’t been even a second when the pressure in her stomach had her stand up right away and leave for the bathroom. Little did she know that the urge to pee would grow again soon after her visit. It had been a very tedious aspect of her early pregnancy, a constant pressure in her lower abdomen that couldn’t be taken care of any other way but by peeing to relieve her body. Hence, Soon-ok wouldn’t ever find it in herself to complain if everything could have just been reduced to that. Though to her dismay, maternity awaited her at the end of an extremely rocky road, one you wouldn’t be able to surpass without experiencing all different kinds of discomfort.

The woman had done a lot of thinking during the ungodly hours of the night where sleep had been chased away by her worries. All that anger, all that negativity she held in Seojun’s regards, they weren’t sentiments she was going to get rid of in one day, but she decided to bury them away, to suppress them as much as she could. She was better than that, she realized how anger and memories of her past lover weren’t the right drive force for her. They weren’t important nor healthy for the growth of her child. 

And that was how she found herself with a smile on her face as she reached her desk again, not wasting a second to start working on her ongoing job, completely into her own bubble. On a regular day, the woman would have at least acknowledged the rival at the desk next to hers, once or twice with dirty looks. But it was as if she had completely forgotten about his existence. Baekhyun’s hands slowed down against the keyboard as he once again stole an uncertain glance at Soon-ok from the corner of his eyes. Even if she didn't act like it, Soon-ok had noticed more than long ago, for what the male thought were discrete and short glances were actually burning stares sinking into her skin. It was as if he was in constant alert, trying to tell whether she was in any kind of discomfort.

Quite frankly, she hated it. 

What? Did she appear weaker, perhaps pitiful now that he knew that she was pregnant and single? It was still none of his business, and wrapping her head around these behaviors of his was all but possible. For all she knew, Baekhyun had no reason to be interested