nothing lives forever, but in this moment, you make our love seem eternal.

“So how long will you be back here for?”

“Just another three days, I have to be back in Japan before the next week starts,” Sakura speaks with a soft smile on her lips.

“I see.” Eunbi presses her lips together. They walk as the night breeze blows into their hair, the sounds of the city fill the air and the pause that occurs is both awkward and pleasant. Eunbi feels a sourness in her heart as sentimentality and nostalgia overcomes her. 

“Thanks for contacting me for a catch-up,” she says, turning to Sakura briefly. She suppresses a sigh; there are either too many things to say, or nothing that can be said, or at least not so easily after the years of separation.

“Always,” Sakura responds in her usual, collected manner that somehow irks Eunbi tonight.

“I still find it amusing, how out of all of us interns, only you decided to pursue your career at Hongshin in the end,” Sakura remarks. When she chuckles, the sound of her laughter falls on Eunbi’s ears like the gentle sound of bells. Eunbi wonders how six short months could have been so long, so long for her heart to cling onto someone and never let go for the rest of her life no matter how many years has passed.

“Well, three of you decided to go back to Japan, Chaeyeon decided to drop this career and pursue dance with her sister, and the rest…” 

“Right, what Chaeyeon did is amazing,” Sakura nods as she says, “but you’re doing meaningful work at Hongshin too.”

Eunbi turns again briefly and she catches a glimpse of the familiar twinkle in Sakura’s eyes, as her hair is pulled backwards by the wind. Her heart squeezes. Momentarily brought back to their days of youth, the days that were vibrant only to be followed by the darkest nights, Eunbi acknowledges that the feelings still reside in her and gives in when something tells her that this might be her last chance; perhaps it is time to hear them in her own voice.

“I missed you so much.”

Their footsteps halt. Eunbi holds her breath when both girls face each other, with their eyes gazing into each other’s. Eunbi is brought back again to the time they first met, when Sakura’s lovely brown orbs had first drawn her in like a black hole in a galaxy. 

“I missed you too,” Sakura replies, caution audible in her voice. 

Eunbi lets her eyes trace every feature on the face that still draws her in despite the changes that came with age and circumstances.

“I’ve always known you were pretty,” Eunbi breathes, “since the first time I saw you. Your eyes caught me; they drew me in, and they seemed to carry in them a thousand different meanings, a thousand different emotions. It was as if behind the bright, twinkling eyes, they hid so much pain, loneliness and sorrow. But it was the same pair of bright, twinkling eyes that shone to give me all the hope and strength I needed when nothing else could.”

Sakura stays silent, as she has been since Eunbi has started talking. Not believing her ears, she replays Eunbi’s words in her head, as she tries her best to process the load of information in Eunbi’s words. 

Sakura remembers the days when Eunbi had always felt so far away. Eunbi, wearing a clean porcelain face, a smile that stops hearts, has always been Sakura’s definition of beauty. How could she have been thinking that of me all this while, that I’m pretty?!

But more than that, Sakura wracks her head as she tries to understand how Eunbi has seen her through her eyes. Sakura would’ve never thought that Eunbi looked at her enough to realise the complicated emotions Sakura concealed behind her eyes. 

And just how did Sakura come to be Eunbi’s source of hope and strength?

“Remember the days you found me alone with my eyes red, cheeks stained with my tears, the nights you called to talk only to find me crying, troubled over things you didn’t know what but you just kept telling me that whatever happens you’d always believe in me?”

Sakura exhales and recalls, her days in the distant past of admiring the older girl and just wanting to be with her all the time, when things were simpler, when she could still find the answers to the things she cried over. Now, crying isn’t even an option when you don’t even know what your problems are.

Their innocent days of vigour as they fought with their youth were filled with each other’s company, and their days fleeted while they were still blinded to see the things that they now could see, as the youth wore off. Now, everything seems to be laid clearly before them.

Eunbi’s eyes well up when she remembers the beginning of her life without Sakura. 

“You don’t know, Sakura, but you mean a lot to me. You really don’t know,” Eunbi chuckles and lowers her head.

“I’m afraid of seeing you go again,” Eunbi says, finally, as she brings her head back up, in a weak, trembling voice while her tears find their way down her cheeks. “I tried not to think of you, but I thought of you every day. But I couldn’t bring myself to contact you either, no matter how often you came into my mind, appeared in my dreams…”

Sakura hates it. It hits her immediately that she hates seeing Eunbi cry. In fact, it has always pained her to see Eunbi in tears. “No,” she shakes her head, and uncontrollably she begins to cry as well.

Can it be any other way? Sakura asks in her mind.

“I’ll come back, or you can come over, I don’t know, but no, I don’t want to leave you,” Sakura says with panic in her voice. She only realises the true feelings she has concealed for years when she hears them out of her lips. 

“I’ve always loved you,” Sakura admits, with a little guilt for the delay that cost them a lifetime. When she exhales, she hears somewhat relief in her breath. Sakura feels like a soda bottle that has its lid off after having been kept sealed for over ten years.

The tension in Eunbi releases as she stands motionless before Sakura in incredulity, while the latter stands still, cautious for a response.

Eunbi opens but finds no words. “I…” 

The confusion does not leave her, but Eunbi finds her lips breaking into a smile. She plunges forward and wraps her arms around Sakura. Sakura feels a gush of warmth in her chest.

“Thank you,” she says, and only realises then the weight of their words. 

“But how can this work?” Eunbi immediately retracts her arms and takes a step back, her lips curving into a frown.

Sakura frets. “We can make this work,” she holds Eunbi by the arms. “If you’d like to try, I’d like to,” she takes a deep breath and says. “I wish we could,” Sakura pleads, as her hands slide down Eunbi’s arms to hold the older girl’s hands in hers.

“Kkura, I really love you, I don’t want to let you go,” Eunbi shakes her head as her lips turn into a grimace. She starts to sob while her fingers remain tightly gripping onto Sakura’s. As she squeezes her eyes shut, tears stream endlessly from their corners. 

With the intensifying heartache from the sight of Eunbi in her current state, Sakura opens her arms and takes a step forward before wrapping them tightly around Eunbi’s small frame. 

“I don’t want to let go of you either,” Sakura earnestly says. “We can make this work,” she says amidst her tears, mustering every bit of confidence she has, “we can.” 

“Please believe me, Eunbi unnie,” Sakura voices the sincere, truest request of her heart.

Maybe it’s possible, Eunbi tells herself as her fingers lightly grasp onto Sakura’s blouse while her chin rests on Sakura’s shoulder. After all, this reunion cannot be made into a waste. 

“I want to,” Eunbi softly says.

Sakura gapes. Her lips crack into a small smile. “Thank you, unnie, I’ve wished for a long time to be this close to you.”

“Me too,” Eunbi inhales, “I’ve waited my whole life to be with you again.”

Sakura pushes a lock of hair away from Eunbi’s face to the back of her ear. They look into each other’s eyes once again, finding the cosmos in them.

“Thank you for coming to me,” Eunbi says in a whisper.

“Thank you for being in my life.”

Eunbi had believed in the impermanence of beauty and anything precious since their first separation; it was because of their transient presence that things were all the more precious. But tonight, in Sakura’s brown orbs that still draw her in after they’ve aged, she finds that the ephemerality of neither their love nor the moment so beautiful it ought to be captured like a photo by a camera matters; the immeasurable limitless she finds as she looks into Sakura’s eyes is all the eternity she has been waiting for, all the eternity she needs. 

a/n: japanese title is as translated~

i’ll always love that moment in the first ep of pd48, when eunbi told sakura that she was pretty, and sakura taken aback by the compliment— and i could tell that partially it was because it was coming from a korean trainee, from whom she didn’t expect to be noticed by to be approached in a conversation in their very first meeting, much less be given a compliment. kkubi compilations bring that clip back sometimes, and each time i watch (ofc i watch kkubi moment compilations THESE TWO ARE JUST MADE FOR EACH OTHER) with the beauty of the moment i always felt the need to write a story of eunbi telling sakura that she thought sakura was pretty since the moment they first met BECAUSE SHE REALLY DID ;-;;;; 

the concept of impermanence and eternity was inspired by this song Orange Road by Yukika as i was listening to it while finishing up(? writing the second half?) this oneshot. i’m not sure if i have been able to completely put across what was to be conveyed with the story, and i’ll probably read this a few more times and make edits and revise, but i hope you enjoy it still. i’ve been writing kkubi for quite a while now but this is my first complete one that i can put out, blesssss finally a kkubi up ;-;;