You said goodbye 
I fell apart 
I fell from all we had 
Though I never knew 
I needed you so bad

A week.

It has been a week since Jina left me.  It has been a week since I've been alone in the house.  It has been a week since I've been waking up to an empty, cold house.  No sweet-smelling breakfast, no yummy dosirak, no hot dinner, no prepared clothes, no sweet smile, no everything.

No Jina.

I bit my lip and sighed on our lonely bed.  I stretched my arm to where she used to lie down but my arm only met an empty space.  I took her pillow and hugged it instead.  This was how I've been doing every night.

Ah, thank God her fragrance is still on the pillow.

You need to let things go
I know, you told me so
I've been through hell
To break the spell

For that one week, I kept on checking my phone for any text message nor calls from her.  But nothing, nada, zilch. 

Doesn't she love me anymore?

My mind went back to the last night I saw her.  I couldn't believe she actually left me.  Was I that bastard of a husband that she could actually leave me?

For that one week, I'm in denial....

I miss Jina.

Why did I ever let you slip away 
Can't stand another day without you 
Without the feeling 
I once knew

"Hyung, are you okay?"  Daesung asked as once again they caught me staring into space.

"Yeah, something must be up.  I think it's been a week since you last dug a girl."  Seungri commented and wiggled his eyebrows to which I rolled my eyes at.

"Shut up.  I'm not in the mood."  I mutter as I close my eyes.  Immediately, I opened them as Jina's face flashed in my mind.  "."  I whispered but Daesung seemed to hear it.

"Ooooh~~~!  Something's definitely up!"  He exclaimed and looked away when I threw him a death glare.  If they got brains, they should know better than to bug me.

"What's wrong now.......Jina finally left you?"  Gdragon taunted.  It took all my energy not to punch his pretty face.  "She did, didn't she?"  He prodded on.  I felt hurt more than anger.  I stood up and stormed out of the room because I just couldn't take it anymore.  The truth coming out from somebody else's mouth made it all real.  The fact that I kept on denying to myself was indeed real.  Jina left me.

And it hurts.

If you could see me now 
You would know just how 
How hard I try 
Not to wonder why

Two weeks.

It's been two weeks since my wife left me.  

I chuckled to myself when I staggered in to my empty, cold house after having a drinking marathon at some bar I stopped over.  Clothes were scattered on the floor.  Foul odor welcoming my nostrils but I didn't care.  What's the use of caring?  Who would care about what my house would look like?  Why should I care?  

There's no one to share this house with.

It has been two weeks since I've been sleeping on our- I mean, my emtpy bed and yet I don't think I could ever get used to it.  I hesitated and refuse to believe the reality.

It had finally sunk in.

It had been my fault.....not hers.

I wish I could believe in something new
Oh please somebody tell me it's not true (Oh girl)
I'll never be over you

Three weeks.

"JINAAAAA!!!!"  I woke up screaming.  Heart thumping fast, cold sweat dripping, I closed my eyes trying to forget the image of MY JINA in the arms of another man.  She was beaming happily up at him.  I felt hurt as I tried to remember when I last saw her that happy.  And I couldn't remember when.  Was it that long ago?  

Has she moved on?

I hugged her pillow, trying to convince myself that she was coming back and that she was still mine.

Maybe tomorrow...

If I could have you back tomorrow 
If I could lose the pain and sorrow 
I would do just anything 
To make you see 
You still love me

The next day, Big Bang had been given the day off after a very hectic schedule promoting around the country.  The boys were able to force me to go out with them and have fun.  Daesung and Seungri kept on annoying me telling me horrible and horrendous I looked.  They promised to shut up I go with them.  So I did.

As we were waiting for our food in the newly opened private restaurant that Taeyang recommended, I tuned out the loud ruckus the boys were doing and stared out the window instead.  

What are you doing right now, Jina?

Great.  Like fate had to just rub it in, a happy couple was now making their way out of the building across the street.  I could see the the woman's silhouette throwing her head back in laughter.

Just like Jina.

The man was carefullly guiding her by her elbow.  They finally made it and and the instant the light shone upon the woman's face, I gasped.

Jina??

"JINA!"  I yelled and pressed my hands and face against the glass, trying to make sure it was her and I was not hallucinating.  And I was not.  It was indeed Jina.

"JIIINAAA!!!!"  I yelled again and thumped my fists through the glass trying to make her notice me.  She was already on her way to a car with that bastard.

"Hyung!  Calm down!"  The guys said and I quickly shrugged them off.

"MOVE!  I HAVE TO GO OUTSIDE!!!!!"  I shouted at Daesung who scrambled on his feet and moved out of the way.  I dashed outside the private room without a care if anybody would notice me.  

Jina, wait for me....

I cry silently 
I cry inside of me 
I cry hopelessly 
Cause I know I'll never breathe your love again

"JIIIIINNAAAAA!!!!"  I screamed as soon as I got outside the premises.

A little more.

"NO DON'T CLOSE THE DOOR!"  I shouted as I frustratingly tried to cross the busy street.  Cars started to honk but I didn't give a damn.

"NO!!!  NO!!!! JIIIINNAAAAA!"  I shouted again as the man closed the door and went to the driver's seat.

"BASTARD THAT'S MY WIFE!!!!!!"  I screamed successfully got to the sidewalk.

Several meters more.

"NO, JINAAAA!  DON'T GO!! PLEASE!! I'M SORRYYYYY!!!  JINA!  PLEEEAASE!!!  NOOOOO!"  I shouted but the car sped away from me.  I tried to run after them, but it was only seconds before they were already out of my sight.

"No... Jina..."  I whispered as angry tears made their way down my cheeks.  Hurt, anger, regret, despair, sadness filled my aching heart.

Jina....  You left me....  You left me....

"HYUNG!! ARE YOU OKAY??"  I heard the guys frantically ask when they found me on a bench crying and having a breakdown.

"J-jina left m-me....  S-s-she left..." I couldn't help but sob helplessly and I felt them wrap their arms around me.

"It's okay, hyung... It's okay.... Everything will be fine."  I heard Jiyoung say.  I was shocked by his soft words.  I looked up at him and I noticed his eyes were red, the others' b with tears.  "I promise, hyung... Everything will be fine..."  He repeated.  I gave him a grateful smile.

"I hope so... I love Jina..."  I mumbled.

"We know you do..  It's okay..."  They comforted again.

I love Jina...

I cry 
Cause you're not here with me 
I cry 
Cause I'm lonely as can be 
I cry hopelessly 
Cause I know I'll never breathe your love again

[A/N]  Yeey! I'm so happy I updated.  I'm sorry for the long wait. I hope this chapter was okay. ^_^

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