SooShu

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It wasn’t that Soojin didn’t like Shuhua at all. No. In fact, her feelings were actually deeper than the younger girl-- if only she had the courage to prove it in front of everyone. In front of Shuhua. But she can’t. She just couldn’t.

She was too much of a coward to show it.

She remembered when Shuhua would always run to her to give her the warmest and biggest hugs, only to be shoved aggressively because Soojin was embarrassed--too embarrassed that everyone took it as disgust.

But Shuhua didn’t.

The younger girl would just smile in understanding, albeit a little disappointed, and would continue to shower Soojin with endless affection. Soojin tried her best to ignore it, act harsh and cold while a particular foreigner follows her around the campus, eyes sparkling in admiration while telling stories of her childhood. Of course, Soojin listened to every bit of information. But she would always excuse it as there’s nothing else to do anyway. It was always like that; the countless push of Soojin and the infinite strength of Shuha’s pull to the point of disbelief. Everyone questioned Shuhua’s sanity, pitied, and sympathized with her. Maybe some of them envied her for having the guts to talk to the campus’ heartthrob, Seo Soojin: The Red Fox of IDLE University.

How could Soojin ever turn down the persistent Taiwanese?

But Soojin didn’t.

Unbeknownst to everyone, Soojin actually cared for the younger girl more than their eyes could perceive. She was preparing an extra serving for Shuhua’s meal every lunch--and maybe some dinner, too--knowing that the Taiwanese lives alone in some rundown apartment (the only place Shuhua could afford for now). Or always purchasing extra supplies so she could share the other to Shuhua, and maybe sending dry and short texts to excuse herself from asking the girl’s whereabouts or just literally checking up on her. Soojin could never display such affections, mostly when Minnie, Shuhua’s Senior year guardian, was around.

“You know,” Soyeon started, frowning as she saw the extra lunch box Soojin was carrying. “You could’ve just sat beside her. I wouldn’t really mind.”

Soojin hissed in annoyance as she watched the lone wolf Taiwanese, eating yet another pack of ramen she bought at the cafeteria. The Korean noticed that if Shuhua wasn’t with Yuqi, Miyeon, or Minnie, she would be sitting alone at the corner, having the same old order when she met the girl.

Soojin always wondered how Shuhua preferred to sit at the far-end side of the place, having no one to share the table with aside from dust and ghosts. The Taiwanese were always elected as the representative of their class, having the best marks of their course, and an active member of the dancing club--totally not because she was stalking Soojin but who cares. The girl displays powerful skills, albeit a total contrast to Soojin’s style. So it was a surprise to see her alone every lunch.

“Again, we could just---”

“Shut up, Soyeon.” Soojin interrupted, sighing defeatedly before turning to the opposite side.

“Where are you going?” Soyeon asked, but Soojin was already gone the moment she was about to follow her. Another sigh escaped her lips, shaking her head at Soojin’s unbelievable behavior.

“Soyeon unnie,” It was Shuhua, flashing the same bright smile towards Soyeon. “Are you with Soojin unnie?”

“She just left,” Soyeon shrugged. “She went to the garden, I guess?”

Nodding, Shuhua thanked the smaller girl before making her way to where Soojin might be. Soyeon just stared at Shuhua’s back, thinking what could’ve made the younger girl so obsessed with her best friend. Sure, Soojin was nice and hot, but aside from the picture painted by the society, there was nothing else Shuhua must’ve known. Unless...

“Seo Soojin, you’re such a ty hopeless romantic,” Soyeon muttered.

With that thought, Soyeon made her way to her locker room, hoping that Soojin finally found an inspiration to completely break-free from the pedestal she was put into by the school.

I hope you’re finally showing the real you.

It only started with simple rice cakes or mini cupcakes. She didn’t fully intend to make it an everyday routine to cook Shuhua her lunch after the girl showed her apartment.

Ever since the Taiwanese entered the school and Soojin helped her with ordering her first meal at the cafeteria, the foreigner always followed her everywhere like a puppy. At first, Soojin was absolutely annoyed, thinking that she’s just another student seeing this painted Soojin who’s all perfect and mighty. Surprisingly, however, Shuhua was just honest about her feelings. Bold, fierce, and downright frank if need be. Soojin even recalled this one instance where Shuhua had the audacity to reprimand her.

“Why are you like this?!” Shuhua shouted, lightly pushing the stoic Soojin.

“Like what?” Soojin scowled but didn’t dare look at the Taiwanese’s angry eyes. She was too ashamed even to admit her wrongs.

“Like a ing rebel! Do you think smoking is nice? Does it make you feel badass? Because in my opinion, you’re just seeking attention!”

Soojin snapped. With one swift move, she yanked the younger girl’s collar and pulled her closer to her, eyes boring deep within the souls of the Taiwanese, and with a growl, she said, “Why the do you even care?”

In all honesty, Soojin wasn’t really a fan of smoking. She only did it because her peers pressured her to, and she was also genuinely curious. To stay within the dance club rankings, she had to work her way up and kiss the asses of these seniors so that Soojin would not put her scholarship at stake. Not that her family couldn’t afford the school’s fees, but it was the only way to prove to her parents that dancing doesn’t affect her studies, and it means a lot to her—a lot more than what her little pride could offer.

Shuhua didn’t even look fazed by Soojin’s threatening stare. In fact, it seemed like it was Soojin who’s going to break anytime soon with Shuhua’s firm and fiery eyes. “Because---”

“It’s none of your business,” Soojin quickly interrupted, releasing the younger girl from her grip and promptly tearing her eyes off her. It was too raw for Soojin’s deceitful life. “Not even Soyeon meddled with my life. Who are you to stop me?”

Soojin noticed the pain flashing through Shuhua’s eyes. She pursed her lips and turned her back against her.

“You’re right,” Shuhua muttered. “Who am I to even stop you? I’m just that obsessed girl that follows you everywhere.”

Soojin’s heart clenched. No matter how much she denies she likes Shuhua’s company, her heart could never lie the way her mind always does. And the foreigner always brought truths within herself that scares her a lot--a lot that Soojin just wanted to drop the wall of the lie she built around to protect herself.

But she couldn’t just yet.

“But I like you, Soojin ah!” Soojin’s lips twitched upwards. “I really like you! And if I’m not enough for now to be a reason for you to stop, then I will make sure that one day, I will be that one reason that you will! I promise!”

Did Soojin ever mention that she deeply admires Shuhua’s unwavering intensity?

“I’m looking forward to that day, then, Shuhua ya.”

Looking back, Soojin did stop smoking after that day. She told herself she was just not really into it, and she never liked the taste of nicotine anyway. But deep inside, she knew it had something to do with the foreigner.

Shuhua still followed her everywhere, but unlike her other admirers, the foreigner was absolutely bold and shameless. Nevertheless, it was quite endearing that Shuhua knows boundaries and consent, too. Whenever the foreigner senses Soojin’s discomfort, she would instantly ask her what’s wrong. And it was funny how the younger girl would never stop unless she knew what was bothering her. At times, Soojin would that it was because of her close distance. But then would immediately take it back when Soojin sees Shuhua’s upset expression and willingness to put a space between them. The girl was really one of a kind.

“Found you!”

Startled, Soojin almost fumbled with the box on her lap. Thankfully, Shuhua’s quick reflexes prevented it from tumbling down the floor.

“What’s this?” Shuhua asked, and a blush did spread across Soojin’s cheeks.

“For you…” She muttered.