"Come on Lena. Please, pretty please," Jaejoong begged sweetly at me.

            I slowly looked at him. "Look I don't really want to involve myself in such things. I am a girl for god's sake, Jaejoong. What do I know about courting a girl?" I asked with a raised tone.

            His maddening smile suddenly appeared. "Yes, I know that. But that's the point. You're a girl. At least you would know or have an idea what another girl would like when it comes to guys and dating," he replied as he then placed his arm around my shoulder. "Come on, buddy. Please help me. I really like the girl. Only you can help me. Please say yes. . ."

            A deep sigh escaped from my throat. I was suddenly placed in a difficult dilemma. . . by my very best friend. . . and the only boy that I had learned to love.

            "Jae, I really can't do it. If you really like the girl just court her on your own. I don't want to mingle in such affairs," I tried to excuse myself from the further pain that I knew it was going to bring me.

            "What's wrong? You have never said no to me. So why are you suddenly doing it now? Can't you just learn to say no to me . . . some other time . . . not now please. I really need your help, best friend," he continuously begged while hugging me. His touch was starting to make me feel uneasy. I know he didn't have any meaning to his actions. But to me, it presented something different . . . something I knew he couldn't offer.

            "Jae, let's change the topic. I already said no," I said as I looked away from him. My heart was starting to ache.

            "Lena, I really need you now," he uttered the words that left my heart totally numb.

            I stared at him seriously. "I'm sorry, but please just find someone else."

            Now it was my turn to beg. I was reluctant to help him because I was afraid that my own feelings for him would be revealed in the process.

            "What I am asking you is so simple. Why is it that you don't want to do it? Look. . . you're just going to befriend Min Rin. Then afterwards. . . when the two of you are already friends . . . you're going to introduce me to her. And while I'm courting her, all you need to do is be her friend and put in a good word for me," Jaejoong was trying hard to persuade me.

            Somehow everything I was hearing was like a maddening scene that was already playing in my head.

            I gazed at my best friend's face. He had been with me since I was only six years old. And even though he was two years older than me, we still matched each other like a perfect pair.

            He could easily tell what was in my mind by just looking at my eyes. And somehow I could also do the same with him. Everywhere I went . . . he was always beside me. And everywhere he went . . . I was always looking out for him.

            He was my sunlight and I was his shadow.

            "Please Lena, I'm begging you. Help me this time and I will be forever indebted to you," he said with such a sweet voice.

            Just hearing his voice was already melting my heart.

            "I. . . I really like her Lena. I've never felt like this before. I don't know what I would do if I lose her," Jaejoong suddenly uttered seriously.

            I couldn't help but stare at him.

            "Are you really blind Jaejoong? Can't you see that you're hurting me? What you're asking of me is too much. I love you . . . you fool. Can't you see? If I give in to your request . . . it would be like killing myself. Is that what you want me to do Jaejoong? Are you really in love? I've been with you for so many years. And I've been in love with you since I was ten. That's four years Jaejoong. I had been waiting for you for four years now. But why are you suddenly giving your heart to someone else?" I uttered in my mind as I silently looked at him.

            Jaejoong suddenly took my hands and held them tightly, then he slowly knelt down in front of me.

            "Jaejoong! What are you doing?" I asked with shock. I started to look around the park. Good thing that no one was around.

            "Please help me Lena," he uttered with desperation in his eyes.

            At that exact moment, I felt like my heart had stopped. Somehow I couldn't breathe.

            "Lena, please . . ." he uttered again.

            I don't know what happened. But I couldn't stand seeing him in such a pitiful state.

It was my heart that decided. . .

            It was better that I be the one suffering than him. I loved him too much. I couldn't bear to see him in pain.

            I slowly closed my eyes and nodded. I didn't want him to see the tears that were already forming in my eyes.

            Jaejoong quickly stood up and started to embrace me tightly. "Thank you," he whispered in my ear.

            My mind was already spinning from all the emotions I was feeling.

            "Thank you Lena . . ." he said again as he quickly gave me a short kiss on the forehead.

            My heart immediately skipped a beat. I don't know why but I felt like my heart was dying . . . .

            A tear quickly escaped from my eye. My heart was fearing something . . . Somehow my heart knew I was going to lose my best friend and my first love. . . .

            As he happily held me in his arms, only one thing was screaming inside my head.

. . ."I love you Kim Jaejoong . . . why can't you love me back?"