Haseul had been awake for a couple of hours but she hadn't left her bed at all, hair messed up and still in just an oversized t-shirt, when a hand repeatedly rapped on her door. 

"Haseul! Wake up! Vivi's here!" Yeojin shouted.

"Wait, what?" She and Haseul had texted earlier, and Vivi said she would be at work all day. But Haseul wouldn't miss any opportunity to see her, so she leapt out of bed, pulled on the pair of pants nearest to her, and ran out of her room. She could hear Yeojin laugh at her as she went to the front door but really, she couldn't care less.

There she really was, standing in front of her. She was only wearing her bright red lifeguard uniform, shorts, and some beat up flip flops with her hair, although tied up, falling in wet strands over her face. Vivi panted, a nervous smile on her lips, and Haseul looked around. 

"Is...is everything alright?" Haseul asked, reaching to hold Vivi's arm. 

"Yeah. It's... it's alright." She gave Haseul a bright grin and her eyebrows furrowed. 

"Don't you have work today?" 

"Yeah. I'm on my lunch." 

"But that's only..." 

"Half an hour, I know. So I gotta hurry up. I just..." Vivi paused, her breathing finally back to normal. She sat up more, suddenly shy, staring at the ground. "I was just watching the kids up in the tower and I suddenly realized, we never made it official?" 

Haseul laughed. "Oh yeah. Neither of us ever..." 

"So I decided it couldn't wait." She reached for both of Haseul's hands and held them tight in her own. "Haseul, will you be my girlfriend?" 

Haseul laughed with pure joy. "Yes! Of course yes!" 

"Oh thank god."

Haseul pecked her lips. "Nothing to be nervous about! Of course I was gonna say yes. I mean, I'm sure you knew I was gonna say yes, but did you, like, know-know? I get it. And I mean, I know we hadn't really discussed it, but I kinda just assumed we were, but it's nicer to hear it anyways. And of course, you know me, I didn't assume to hard, and...yeah." 

Vivi giggled at Haseul's little monologue. "Yeah. All of that." 

She pulled Haseul's head down onto her shoulder and Haseul snuggled in, a warmth settling in her bones. Vivi was her girlfriend. Officially. For real. One hundred percent. Completely confirmed. Vivi held her with one hand and briefly checked her phone with the other. 

"Ugh." 

Haseul looked up at her and Vivi gazed back. 

"My shift starts in two minutes." 

"Oh !" Haseul cried as Vivi hurriedly stuffed her phone back into her shorts pocket. The girls shared a quick smile. 

"Goodbye," Vivi said, pecking Haseul's lips. "My girlfriend." She did it again. "I-"

"I'm so happy you're mine," Haseul interrupted, giving Vivi her own peck back. "Now go! Don't be late because of me!" 

Vivi pecked her yet again as another goodbye and ran off. Haseul watched her go with the brightest of smiles: how could she have gotten so lucky? 

But once Vivi's pretty frame faded into the distance Haseul let out a sigh, shutting the door and going to the kitchen. What would she do today? Vivi was working until the evening so she wouldn't be able to hang out of Haseul met her at the beach. 

"Hey there," Haseul said to Yeojin as she grabbed a box of cereal (no Lucky Charms this time). 

"Yo. How's your GF?" 

"She's my gf, officially!" Haseul spoke with so much pride even Yeojin didn't have the heart to .

"Ah. The universe is as it should be." 

"What are you up to today? Vivi's busy until like 7..." 

"Sorry, can't hang today. I'm very busy. The squad all managed to get to a computer so we're having a minecraft sesh." 

Haseul held back a chuckle at Yeojin's word choice. "That's fine. You go have fun." 

"And you stop being such a loser and have friends other than me and your girlfriend." 

"Hey! I have Heejin and Hyunjin!" Haseul protested. 

"Well go hang out with them," Yeojin rebutted, and with a sigh, Haseul sat down to eat her breakfast. 

Once the girls were done, and Yeojin had left to go play with her friends, and Haseul had cleaned up the kitchen, she went back to her room. Hmm....she could just laze around her room all day. Before the summer she would have been really excited to just do that, but now it didn't seem so fun. She could go to the beach by herself, watch Vivi be all cute saving lives and stuff and hang out with her right after she got off work. Or she could do like Yeojin said and hit up Heejin and Hyunjin. She wasn't sure if they were working that day or not though, but if they were free they'd surely be down to hang. 

Haseul sighed, flopping on the bed and contemplating what to do, when suddenly she got a call. The name Jinsoul Jung lit up her phone screen and although a twang of anxiety hit Haseul's stomach, she slowly slid the button to answer the call. It had been quite a while since she had talked to them (she was sure both Jungeun and Jinsoul were there so she could talk to them both), and the last time she had it wasn't quite so bad. Plus, she didn't have an excuse; she wasn't doing anything anyways. And maybe...she kinda wanted to talk to them. 

"Haseul!" Both girls yelled, just like the last time she'd picked up. 

"Are you busy? We miss you so so much! We really need to catch up!" Jinsoul cried. 

"Nope. I don't have any plans today." 

"Ugh, thank god," Jinsoul answered. 

"How's it been? Still just like you're in a teen movie?" Jungeun asked. 

"Yeah. Actually...this summer feels more and more like a movie every day..." It was true, too. Especially being with Vivi now, her life barely even felt real. 

"Summer movies are the best, but it always feels so sad when the summer ends and everyone has to go back to school," Jinsoul said. 

Haseul sighed deeply; she felt that one in her chest. "For sure, for sure..." 

"But there's no reason to be sad! This years gonna be really fun! Senior year!" Jinsoul cheered, and Jungeun made whooping noises in the background. 

"Um..." Haseul's heart started sinking. She didn't want to think about it. 

"There's gonna be so much fun stuff. The senior costume cruise, senior trip, and of course prom! We have got to start planning for prom as soon as you get back. I know those sorts of things can be not your thing, but we can make it really special! Just about us. Who cares about everyone else at school? We can just do those things, the three of us." 

"And I mean, easier classes too," Jungeun added. "I know we all planned an easy course load for this year. This year us going to be about us. It's got to be all about friendship...since we'll all go off to college soon we have to make the most of this." 

"Soooo many weekend sleepovers," Jinsoul added. "I absolutely insist! I even told my parents so they could physically and mentally prepare for you and Jungeun being over all the time." 

"Yeah," Haseul answered, trying to make the other girls thinks she was okay. But she wasn't, far from it. She felt physically nauseous, hearing about all of these things. 

Part of it was this ending. The easy days at the beach, the simple job without classwork. Hanging out with Yeojin and Heejin and Hyunjin, friends that made her feel truly safe. It wasn't Jungeun and Jinsoul's fault that she didn't feel like she could be one hundred percent herself around them. Maybe it was the circumstances of meeting. But Haseul still didn't feel like it was quite so easy with Jungeun and Jinsoul. 

And, of course, Vivi. Vivi. Her lovely, precious girlfriend that would be going to college far away, whose pretty face she couldn't see in person every day, whose soft hand she couldn't hold, whose perfect lips she couldn't kiss. She didn't want to even imagine just hearing Vivi's voice through the muffled speaker of her cell phone. They had only just begun and in a way, in a few weeks, it would all be ending. Could Haseul take it? Not right now, she couldn't. 

But that wasn't everything. Leaving behind her Egret Cove life, but what almost hurt more was stepping back into her old one. Here she had gained friends, security in herself, and maybe a little bit of confidence. She didn't have any of that back there. Could she even bring it over? All of her memories of home and high school were tainted with feeling alone, with feeling like she could never, ever be enough. And just hearing about all those social events she never thought she'd be cool enough for made her feel like she still wasn't cool enough. Like she'd never be cool enough. Like Jungeun and Jinsoul would never see her as cool at all, let alone cool enough. 

"You okay?" Jungeun suddenly asked. Haseul sighed, maybe she had been silent for too long.

"Yeah." Well...she couldn't be honest with them. It was hard to shake the feeling that they had only saught her out as a friend initially out of pity. But maybe they'd grown to like her, along the way. It was easier now to believe that they actually liked her as a friend, at least partially. So she couldn't shut down all of their plans with her own buzzkill nature. She would just have to find a way to make excuses to weasle out of all those events when she got back. "That...that all sounds great." 

Jinsoul let out an excited squeal and Jungeun let out an affectionate chuckle, but Haseul's heart just hurt. 

"But how are you? Tell us everything," Jungeun said. 

"Not much has changed." Haseul didn't feel comfortable telling them about Vivi, in fact, she really wanted to get off of the phone with them period. "Actually, though, something came up. I...got called into work. Sorry. I hope we can catch up another time." 

"Alright," Jinsoul answered, and Haseul could hear the pout behind her voice. 

"Ugh, fine," Jungeun groaned. "But please call us." 

"We miss you," Jinsoul said softly, and Haseul was afraid she was going to cry. 

"I miss you too." Haseul knew deep down she meant it, but it was hard to feel that way in that moment. "Bye-bye."

"Bye!" Both girls cried simoltaneously, and Haseul hung up the phone. 

She flopped back onto the bed. She was drained, and empty, and anxious, and terrified, and totally not in the mood to go out anymore (or talk to anyone). She sighed, resigning herself to watching TV in her room the rest of the day. But with a quick knock on her door, her plans were ruined. 

Haseul sighed deeply. "What?" 

"It's grandma," that soft frail voice spoke from the other side of her door. Immediately, Haseul felt guilty and swung it open. 

"I'm sorry, I thought you were Yeojin." 

"Don't worry, dear. Now, Yeojin is being very loud on the computer. I was wondering if you would play some cards with me in the living room?" 

Haseul's hardened heart softened a little. "Of course, grandma." 

The older woman smiled and they walked to the living room, Haseul assisting her in her walker. They sat on opposite sides of the couch, and she pulled out a worn deck of cards. Haseul began to shuffle. 

"What should we play?" 

"Something simple. Complicated games have been difficult for me these days." 

Haseul tried not to ache all over and nodded. "How about war?" 

"That sounds wonderful." 

Haseul divided up the cards, and they started the game in gentle silence. 

"How is home? Have you spoken to anyone there recently?" Her grandma asked. 

What a coincidence. "Yeah, actually, I talked with my friends today." 

"They must miss you so much." 

Haseul shrugged. "I guess."

Her grandmother fell silent for a few moments before speaking again. "Have you been enjoying Egret Cove?" 

"Yes," Haseul answered, and all the enthusiasm in her voice was sincere. "I'm...I'm so happy here. I don't ever want to leave." 

She hummed before speaking. "It's a wonderful place, isn't it?" 

"Wonderful." 

"Full of joy, and safety. But Haseul...you don't have to leave all that when you leave this place." Haseul looked up, eyes full of curiosity. "You can bring it with you, back home. The joy...the safety...they're not exclusive to here."

"I don't know..." 

"You've been hurt, and here you're finally healing. But that healing came from within, Haseul. These people...our beach...they helped you heal. But when you leave those things behind, the healing won't go away. It's within you. It can't leave so easily." 

Haseul had fallen silent. She didn't know what to say. 

"You'll be whole when you go home. And you'll stay whole."

It was strange, talking like this with her grandma. Haseul had always talked to her when she was a child, but as she had gotten older she'd closed herself off to everyone, really. She thought nobody wanted to be close to her anymore. Maybe she'd been wrong. So, she let herself share in this conversation. "You...you don't think it will be just like it was before?"

"It won't be. It can't be. I don't think you could go back to the way things were before, even if you wanted to. You.... even though you won't have the loved ones you have here, you'll be able to take in the love from those around you that you couldn't before." 

Haseul's eyes filled with wetness but she hid her face before her grandmother could see. Those were words she would have to sit with for a long time before they seeped into her bones. "Alright, come on. Let's play."