Chapter 1 - Number 88

Lee Youngeun was lying on her bed after the worst day of her life. She checked her cellphone. It was just past 4 AM, but she couldn’t sleep. She still felt his hand in hers. She couldn’t forget his face looking at her. His scared eyes, his face covered in blood…

She had to think back on her life. Everything that had happened to her only led to even bigger despair. Lee Youngeun grew up as an orphan. She never found out what had happened to her biological parents. Whether they were dead or if they just didn’t want her wasn’t important, as all possibilities led to Lee Youngeun being in Hansol Orphanage. It was a place like a hell with no way of escaping. Back then Lee Youngeun was her real name. She and the other kids were treated like wild animals. They had to do hard labor, didn’t get proper food and had nothing to laugh about. In Youngeun’s life, there was a single ray of light, however. Number 88, her only friend Kim Soohyun made this hell into a paradise. In the darkest times, she was able to find hope because of his words. Both of them loved to fold paper planes, as it was the only toy they had available. Youngeun remembered every second she had spent with her friend back in the orphanage. The boy with blue eyes who didn’t have parents. After she had been adopted by Do Jaehwan, the owner of Hansol orphanage, Youngeun had seen Number 88 only one more time. It was a rainy day, but her friend came over to the house to check if she was alright anyway. After that day, when she wasn’t able to open the door for him, she had never seen her friend again.

Her childhood was good after she had been adopted. The family had lost their only daughter Do Hyunjin due to leukemia, therefore Lee Youngeun would become the second Do Hyunjin. She was the replacement for the real daughter. Her adoptive-mother Jung Seoyeon had always wanted her real daughter to become a ballet dancer, so Do Jaehwan made clear that it was the second Hyunjin’s dream as well. The way he talked to her scared Youngeun but at least she escaped the hell called Hansol. She did as she was told and was the perfect replacement for the real Hyunjin. She was sent to Russia to dance, she did get a good education, she basically had been given everything she wanted except for real affection. Her adoptive father never loved her to begin with, he just saw her as a puppet to replace his dead daughter in order to calm down his wife. Her adoptive mother forced herself to love Youngeun. She didn’t want to accept her real daughter’s death and therefore tried to ignore the fact that the child she was so obsessed about wasn’t her own. After she had done all that was expected from her, Youngeun turned into a skilled, smart and beautiful adult. She eventually convinced her adoptive parents to let her go to the police academy, where she became the top student of her year and later one of the best detectives in her district in Seoul. Youngeun wasn’t sure why she wanted to become a detective so badly. Was it because she hated all the injustice she had experienced in Hansol orphanage or was it because she wanted to find her only friend, Number 88, so desperately? She didn’t know the answer. Thinking back, it would’ve been the best if she just kept being a dancer in Russia. If she had never gone to the police academy maybe none of this would’ve happened. Maybe she wouldn’t have to mourn her friend. If she hadn’t been a detective maybe she could’ve saved Kim Soohyun.

Just thinking back at the last couple of weeks made her sick. She found out that her adoptive father was the devil himself. He used the numbered children in Hansol orphanage as organ donors without the kids knowing. Whenever a child thought they would be adopted, their organs were sold in fact to save some rich powerful people. Through this, Do Jaehwan tried to become the most powerful man in the country. He wanted to make the powerful people dependent on him as they would all need organs one day, due to health reasons or old age. Just thinking about sacrificing children for such a reason was disgusting. What Youngeun hated, even more, was what happened to her beloved friend due to her father. Do Jaehwan did not shy away from artificial insemination in order to create organs he needed for the treatment of his own daughter. When everything in Hansol orphanage went out of control, he wanted to get rid of all children, including his own son Number 88. To his bad luck, Kim Soohyun didn’t die. He was supposed to be thrown off into the sea on a smuggler boat, but the smugglers took the boy in. Youngeun didn’t know all the details but she knew that a killer named Pavel took Number 88 with him. This man turned him into a killer as well. Kim Soohyun had never gotten affection, he never learned what was right and what was wrong in society. He had been moving from country to country for his next job to kill someone. Youngeun knew that Pavel died through the hands of Russian human traffickers, which was how Soohyun and Youngeun’s paths crossed again. Back then she didn’t know who he was but eventually found out that the veterinarian who lived next door to her was, in fact, her old friend Number 88. She only found out that he was a killer when it was already too late. The countless people he killed couldn’t come back to life and the blood on his hands would never be washed off…

Today was the worst day of her life. Her adoptive father had been killed by the hands of Kim Soohyun. Youngeun didn’t mourn for her adoptive father. He was the worst monster she had ever seen. Even in his time of death, he didn’t feel guilty. Deep down Youngeun felt that it was right for Soohyun to end her adoptive father’s life. Soohyun’s death, however, wasn’t fair. Her friend had been killing countless people, yes. But he wasn’t a bad person. He did feel affection for others. Even though he was like a wild wolf he still wanted to belong somehow. In the end, he did everything to save the numbered children and he did everything in his power to protect Seulgi and herself as well.

The moment his body had been riddled with bullets, Youngeun’s heart broke into a thousand pieces. She had endured so much. She had seen her first love dead in someone else’s house, she waited for years to find Seulgi, the sole witness, only to find out that Soohyun’s foster father was responsible for Hyuk’s death. There was so much she could never say out loud and had to keep inside of her. Seulgi had told her that Soohyun had nothing to do with Hyuk’s death and that he even saved her from getting killed as well. Deep down Youngeun knew that she would be able to forgive Soohyun for all the evil deeds he had been doing but she would never be able to say it out loud. She was a police officer after all… Another thing she would never be able to tell him was that she didn’t just consider him as a friend. She only realized it today when he was grabbing her hand. He was lonely and he didn’t want to die alone. He wanted to see her one last time. She wasn’t sure what it was that he felt. He wasn’t a normal person with normal feelings. Everything inside of him was different. He was not a human being, he was a wild wolf. He cared more for animals than for people. Youngeun, however, realized then, that she loved him deep down. She was in love with a killer, but he died in her arms.

She cried for at least five minutes in despair without anyone budging until prosecutor Yoon Jaehyun ordered the men that had just killed Kim Soohyun to take her away from the dead body.

“No! Let me go!” Youngeun screamed.

“We should go now and let the rest of the team take care of this”, Yoon Jaehyun said.

“Soohyun!” Youngeun screamed again. She had been dragged into the police car. She tried to get out of the car again to be with Soohyun but they locked it.

“Open up this damn car!” Youngeun yelled again covered in tears and Soohyun’s blood.

“Sunbae, please get it together!” Kang Euisoon, her junior detective, yelled back at her. “He’s dead! There’s nothing you can do about it. Just look at you! You’re all covered in blood! I’ll take you home and we’re going to take care of the rest here. There’s no need for you to see all this…” he tried to calm her down. Youngeun looked at her hands, they were completely red covered in blood. Euisoon was right. There was nothing she could do. She couldn’t bear to watch them drag out Soohyun’s dead body and she also didn’t want to see it. He was gone and she couldn’t do anything about it. She had to go home and tell Seulgi, but what was she supposed to say?

“You can just take a few days off, we’ll wrap up the rest” Euisoon told her as they arrived at Youneun’s house. She just nodded and got out of the car. She wanted to go into the animal hospital, but she knew no one would be there and she didn’t want her colleague to stay. She just wanted to be alone right now. She walked up the stairs to her apartment slowly. She was exhausted when she arrived on the fourth floor. Kang Seulgi sat in front of Soohyun’s door. When she saw her sitting there on the floor she froze. Seulgi stood up.

“Where’s Kim Soohyun?” she asked anxiously. Seulgi came closer to look at Youngeun. She saw her all covered in blood with red eyes from all the crying.

“Where’s Kim Soohyun?!” she screamed. Tears came out of Youngeun’s eyes again. All she could do was shake her head. She had no words to explain.

“You were supposed to save him…” Seulgi said with so much pain in her eyes. As Youngeun couldn’t answer Seulgi just started crying and ran upstairs to her apartment. Youngeun didn’t even dare to look her in her eyes. Seulgi was right… the killer saved people, but the detective let people die. She broke down in front of her door and cried again. She had never felt this pain not even after Hyuk’s death. She felt as if she would die from the pain she felt at that moment as well. The day had already turned dark when she was finally able to get up from the floor. She went inside of her apartment and went straight to the bathroom. She wanted to get rid of Soohyun’s blood. She looked inside the mirror, she looked terrible. She looked like she slaughtered all these people with her own hands. There was blood on her hands, on her face, basically all over her body. She freaked out. All the blood was too much. She opened the shower and went in with all her clothes on. She cowered on the floor while the cold water was running over her body. She probably cried for another hour until she had no energy left. She changed into dry clothes and just laid in her bed. She just kept crying in her bed. She kept seeing Soohyun’s scared face whenever she closed her eyes. It ate her up from the inside, but she couldn’t do anything. The last time she checked the time it was already past 5 AM. Eventually, her body was so exhausted that she fell asleep.

When she woke up again. she wanted to check her phone but it had no more battery. Youngeun didn’t feel like charging it, she didn’t even feel like talking to anyone. She felt empty. Her lifelong goal to find her friend ended in the blink of an eye. She did not only lose her family but everyone she loved. She even felt bad for Philip. It seemed as if he barged in to stop Sooyhun but ended up getting killed himself. She had tears in her eyes again. Then someone knocked on her door.

“Unnie” it was Kang Seulgi’s head that popped into the room. “Let’s eat something”.

Youngeun didn’t feel like eating but she got herself together. She promised Soohyun to protect Seulgi in his place. Seulgi was still in Highschool whereas Youngeun was an adult. She had to take care of her, which was the only thing that kept her going at that moment. Seulgi bought food for both of them and arranged it at the table. Youngeun sat down and both of them silently started to eat.

“One day when you’re ready… can you tell me what happened yesterday?” Seulgi asked quietly. “I’ve made you wait a long time, so I’m going to wait for you as well”.

“No” Youngeun said and shook her head. “I can tell you now if you’re ready for what I’m about to tell you” Youngeun continued. After they were done eating both of them sat on the couch and Youngeun began to talk. She told Seulgi the entire story, from the two meeting at Hansol orphanage to his adoptive father’s evil deeds. Youngeun was not allowed to tell this confidential information to anyone outside of her team, but Seulgi deserved to know. In Youngeun’s eyes, Seulgi was proof that there was something good in Soohyun or at least had been.

“You’re saying he killed so many bad people, but then the police killed him as well?” Seulgi asked. Youngeun wasn’t surprised that Seulgi wasn’t shocked at all. Seulgi had seen people die in front of her as a child and she knew exactly what kind of person Kim Soohyun was. She knew that he was partly responsible for her trauma but still stayed at his side. It was Seulgi who tried to tame the wolf that was inside of him. It was Seulgi as well who always had hope in him. He was the only family she had left, even if it was a broken family. It was better than being all alone in this world.

“Don’t tell me you think his death is justified!” Seulgi screamed. Youngeun could only cry. His death was justified by the law but not in her heart. He was a killer who needed to be eliminated, even if it broke her heart. Seulgi just sobbed endless tears on Youngeun’s shoulder. This wasn’t fair.

“Didn’t we all endure enough?! Why is this so unfair?” Seulgi sobbed. Youngeun could only put her hands around Seulgi to embrace her. She didn’t know how to comfort her otherwise. “At least he saw you one last time…” Seulgi whispered. Youngeun was a little confused by her statement.

“Why would you say it like that” Youngeun asked. Seulgi sat up straight again and dried her tears with her sweater.

“Aren’t you a detective?” Seulgi said while blowing her nose. Youngeun just looked at her confused. “Don’t you know that he loved you?”.

Youngeun didn’t know what to say, what to think or even what to feel. “You really didn’t know!” Seulgi reacted. “Ever since you came here, he changed. You might not have noticed but I know him long enough. He started to care about people because of you. He wanted to do something good. He wanted to change…” Seulgi cried. She was right. Soohyun had been protecting her too much for a heartless killer.

“You liked him too didn’t you?” Seulgi asked but Youngeun could only cry even more. Both of them just sobbed on the couch without knowing what time it was. “Can I stay with you tonight? I don’t want to be alone” Seulgi asked. Youngeun agreed, she didn’t want to be alone herself.

Before going to sleep she charged her phone. As soon as the phone had energy again, she got too many notifications. She listened to her mailbox. Kang Euisoon and prosecutor Yoon called her many times to ask if she was alright. She also received a message from her adoptive mother asking her talk. Youngeun didn’t feel like replying but she at least messaged her team saying she would come to work the next day. She had to wrap up the case.

The next morning Youngeun made sure Seulgi would go to school and then went to work. She had taken a taxi as her own car stayed behind at the scene. When she arrived at the police station, she saw her car standing there. Her colleagues must’ve brought it here. When she entered the room, no one dared to ask her anything. Her reaction to Soohyun’s death must’ve been a topic yesterday, but Youngeun didn’t want to let it get too close to her.

“I’m glad you’re back” prosecutor Yoon said. Youngeun just nodded. “Kim Soohyun and his friend Philip have already been cremated this morning and they will be brought to the cremation facility afterwards”. Youngeun was a little shocked at the announcement. She didn’t even have the time to mourn and now they already burned his body? She couldn’t even be with him then. Why were they so eager to wrap up this case so quickly? They probably didn’t want to lose time, as the paperwork would be endless. She sat down at her desk in the special division team and just stared at the piles of paper. Her eyes were filled with tears, but she had to get herself together. She had to be strong for Seulgi and for herself. She would have to figure out her life from now on. She would have to face the aftermath of her adoptive family as well, but that was something she wanted to deal with later.

There was so much that had to be organized. The numbered children needed to go to a safe place, where they were taken care of. All the evidence would have to be analyzed and too many reports needed to be written. Kang Euisoon told her what had already been taken care of yesterday: The bodies had been taken to the autopsy where Jang Gwangjoon, the medical examiner, took care of them. The house of her adoptive parents had been evacuated to ensure all pieces of evidence, while her mother had been taken into custody for questioning. Youngeun was assigned to write reports. She didn’t like it at all, but she didn’t really have the energy to fight against the orders that came from prosecutor Yoon. He probably thought that going through the pile of evidence would only burden her even more. Youngeun spent the entire day going through the paperwork without realizing the time. Everyone had left already except for prosecutor Yoon.

“Detective Do Hyunjin, don’t you think you should go home? I can drive you”, he said standing in front of her desk.

“Thank you, but I want to finish this” Youngeun said without looking up. Yoon Jaehyun didn’t say anything but kept standing in front of her for a while until he left eventually. After she was alone, she took a deep breath. Tears came out of her eyes without being able to suppress them. She had been working eagerly the entire day in order to suppress her despair, but now that she was alone, she couldn’t control herself anymore. However, there was this strange energy in the office. It felt as if someone was watching her. She had to get a hold of herself… She decided to just go home. She didn’t want to be seen as this vulnerable. She had always been a strong detective that wasn’t afraid of anything. She didn’t want to give anyone a reason to think of her as weak just because she was a woman. She took the car keys that Kang Euisoon left on her table for her. He was a trustworthy junior who always helped her out and that she could rely on. At the moment, however, nothing could give her comfort.

The drive home felt like forever. It felt as if Youngeun had to live in this painful reality forever. As she arrived at her house, she even felt overwhelmed by just looking at the animal hospital. The light inside was off, as if no one had ever been there. She walked upstairs just to stop right in front of his apartment door. She put her forehead against the door. She somehow hoped that she was dreaming. She hoped that he would just appear behind her every second. She wanted to hear one of his weird comments that sometimes felt out of place because he didn’t know what to say at times. She just hoped she could see his face once again. “Why did you leave me behind in this hell… Number 88?”