“I didn’t! He did it, I swear.” I cried. I was on the brink of tears, I wish he’d believe me. He pushed my hand away as Jonghyun walked toward us. Mr. Bench glared at him.

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking straight.” Jonghyun said, still dazed. I was surprised when Jonghyun received a punch and fell to the ground. Jonghyun’s lips had blood. Mr. Bench’s really angry. Jonghyun laughed it off. Is he a mad man? Who laughs when he’s got punched?

“I do deserve that punch.” Jonghyun said standing up and wiping his lips. I remained on where I was standing. What if they brawl? They’d ruin their image.

“You know what? I think you need a few more punches.” Mr. Bench prepared his fist and Jonghyun closed his eyes preparing for the hits. I need to stop this.

I hugged him. Mr. Bench. He looked surprised but loosened his balled fists. My face was on his chest. I hugged him so tight, I felt his heart racing.

My feelings were confused.

Jonghyun stared. After a moment, Mr. Bench freed himself from the hug and cupped my face. I  stared at his sad eyes.

“Call me when you’re over him.” He said referring to Jonghyun. Then he walked away. I want to follow him but my feet were as if glued to the ground.

Jonghyun and I were the only ones left at the park. I still couldn’t believe he kissed me.

Way back before, when I didn’t know he’s with Se Kyung unni, Him kissing me was my most wanted thing to happen. But now, why am I wishing it never happened?

“I’m sorry. I was being such an before.” He broke the silence.

All I can reply was a *Slap.* I want to, I had to.

He rubbed his cheek where I slapped him. “Uh, I think I had enough for today.” He said and chuckled nervously.

“You deserve it.” I said.

“I know… And… Uh…”

“What?” I said with slight annoyance.

“I know with what I just did you might say no or whatever but, Can I ask a favor?” Him asking a favor was a punch to the moon. He never asks a favor unless it’s really important. Usually, his pride is too high, higher than his height. “Just a teeny bit.”

“It depends.”

“Can you not tell Se Kyung about what happened?” He said turning serious.

“And why would you think I’d tell it to her?”

“Because you mi- whatever. It was just a kiss anyway.” He said.

It was just a kiss he says. Even though I’m mad at him for doing that, I can’t help but still hurt. To him it was completely nothing, he might even forget about it in seconds. But the feeling of kissing Jonghyun, It was completely inerasable to me. It isn’t that I wanted it to happen, but still.. I know deep inside, there’s still a happy part of me for that kiss.

“Yeah. It was just a kiss.” I emphasized and walked away without saying goodbye. I hear him calling my name but then he stopped. He must have sensed that I no longer want to hear from him or see him.

As I walked home, I received a few calls from the other SHINee members besides Jjong and Mr. Bench. I ignored them all. Each time I see the caller ID, I was disappointed that it wasn’t Mr. Bench. I need him so badly right now. But then, I’m too stupid to kiss Jonghyun. But is it my fault? I didn’t really see it coming. Swear.

I was near the house when the name flashed on the caller ID caught my eye. I didn’t know why I even answered it.

“Yoboseyo? Yoo Rin-ah?”

“Ne?” I answered.

“I’m sorry to be bothering you, but can we talk?”

“Now?”

“Uh, yeah… Can you meet me at the café downstairs SM?”

“Yeah, sure. I’ll be there.” So yeah, I retreated from the house and went to the café. I didn’t even think twice.

I entered the café and sat at the table. She was wearing sunglasses, but then I could see that she was sad.

By the way, It was Se Kyung unni.

Omo. I'm really sorry for not updating for a long time.

Our internet's waaaay too crappy. 

Continue to read this will `ya? I'm never abandoning this.  I swear.