I was walking to the park after I got off the bus. Still dazed from Jonghyun’s words. I don’t know what to feel. But I’m certain that a part of me was angry. How the hell did he knew that I’m crying for him?! Screw Mr. Bench. I thought I could trust him. Yep, I’m angry at him but still, I know that once I see him in this park, I’d still share whatever thoughts I had. He was the only ear to my story anyway.

My thoughts diverted from Jonghyun, I caught myself thinking of Mr. Bench then to Taemin. I remembered that he was waiting for me. Although he said that there was no pressure, I can’t help but feel to. I’m afraid to hurt him if I don’t love him back, or even like, the least. I didn’t want him to suffer like I do.

Then someone grabbed my hand from behind. “I’m sorry.” I was disappointed that it wasn’t Mr. Bench or even Taemin, or any other SHINee.

I looked back to see Jonghyun. “No, don’t. Uh, Thanks.” I said.

“What for?” He asked curiously.

“For being honest on how you feel. I’m sorry that I may have pressured you or something. Don’t worry, I’m letting go of my feelings.” I faked a cheery voice.

“I didn’t mean what I said I wa-”

“No, really. It’s defini-” I cut him.

But then, I was surprised as his lips were pushed to mine. For a moment there, I felt happy but then… He’s kissing me?! Is he insane?! I pushed him for like, after 5 seconds. Just when I was letting go, he’s doing this?! He’s in a relationship, for God’s sake!

“What the hell?!” I practically screamed at his face.

“I’m so sorry.” He, himself was shocked by his action.

The kiss made me want to cry. I was already letting go, but then he’s doing something to make me fall for him again.  All my efforts to forget him have all gone to waste. My feelings for him were undeniably inerasable. I shouldn’t love him, but I want to. I shouldn’t see him, but I can’t look away. I hate that this feeling’s taking control of me.

I switched back to reality. Jonghyun was looking down, probably ashamed. He should be!

But then, I saw a retreating figure behind him. I know this figure too well.

It was Mr. Bench.

Did he saw the kiss? He might get the wrong idea. I should follow him!So without having second thoughts, I ran to him leaving Jonghyun standing there. Wait. Why am I so concerned in what he might think?

“Wait!” I screamed but he didn’t stop walking.

“Yah!!!!” I screamed again, this time, at the top of my lungs. But still, he wouldn’t even look back. Is he really Mr. Bench? I’m certain that he is!

When I reached him, I grabbed hold of his hand. He turned to me with an expression I couldn’t read. It was like as if he’s angry or depressed.

“I thought you were moving on?! Why the hell would you do that?!” So, he was angry.

I was afraid to speak. I've seen him yelled but this time, it’s different. I was afraid that once I told him about what I really feel, he might stop seeing or hanging out with me in this park. For some unknown reason, I don’t know why I’m more bothered by Mr. Bench than with Jonghyun.

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