Rated M for curse words and some mentions of ually-related things :D

No , for a change ^^

 

Drabble of what happened during the photoshoot of Kai, Taemin and Krystal for W Magazine a few years ago

Mostly insipired by these gifs :

(wherein Taemin backhugged Jongin but he pulled his hand away immediately when Jongin was still feeling it with eyes closed, and Taemin going away as if nothing's wrong)

My heart doesn’t wish for this

Your calls have become shorter and less frequent

Here and there, I don’t want to hear it

A lie isn’t the same as a rumor

You scared me with the sound of you

wanting to leave.

 

2015

Jongin was hurt and was somehow feeling indifferent towards Taemin. He doesn't initiate skinship and waited for Taemin to make the first move - but it never came because Taemin was upset.

Dispatch have released photos of Taemin and Kai at the Han river on a stroll at night. It was only a talk between them but people were surprised about it and they started to question if they were dating. They never confirmed nor denied anything but because of that news, SM Entertainment wanted to release proofs that both of them were straight. With that, Krystal was encouraged to try dating Kai so she could get away with the stress of knowing that her sister got kicked out of her own group and Sulli have left f(x).

Taemin saw Krystal asked Kai if they could go and play outside, but he just kept it to himself because for sure if this wouldn't turn out to be good for both of their images, SM will make him do something again. He have experienced it before when he was casted on WGM and his "wife" were hated by his own fans so he was quite anxious with what will happen to Jongin and Soojung but he also believes in them since the three of them are the closest.

 

But then the thing going on between Kai and Krystal became too believable to the point that even Krystal fell for Kai. He's sweet, caring and fun, but Jongin could only see her as his sister. And for the sake of their careers, they just pushed through until Dispatch broke out the scandal of them dating.

 

When the news broke out, Kai was playing billiards with Taemin, while Taemin was actually smoking more than the usual. He's stressed not because of work, but because of something else.

"What the? Both of us smoke but you've already finished your second box. What's up, Taem?"

"It's nothing."

"Taemin, I know you more than you know yourself. II know there's something, spill it."

"I'm just stressed out with work. Besides, I have to get ready for my next album. Next year, there would be another one."

"Wow. You must've really stressed. Sorry for that, I can't do anything if it's because of work."

"Yeah, you won't be able to help anyway so just let me smoke in peace and for 's sake, Moongyu is already winning."

"Shut up. Haha."

"Congratulations, it's out now."

"What?"

"You and Krystal."

"Oh. Seems like they've really followed us."

"Soojung is a great catch, you're lucky. You just have to guard her heart or Sooyeon nuna would fly back here from SanFo and you'll be dead."

"I know what I'm doing."

"Good for you then. Uhm, Moongyu ya, you still have another hour for this, right?"

"Yes. Why? Do you want to extend?"

"No, I'm afraid I'd be going ahead. I'll leave the two of you here. I want to discipline myself, I might finish a total of 5 boxes of cigarettes in only a few hours. That's not good so yeah."

"Taemin-ah.."

"I'm okay. I'm sure you'd both be okay here right? Moonkyu, congratulate Jongin. He got a girlfriend out of Soojung."

"As if hahaha."

"Haha see for yourself then. I'll be going ahead. Have a great night, you two."

 

"So Taemin really finished 3 boxes of cigarettes since we went here? Does he want to get his vocal chords damaged?"

"He told me he's stressed because of his next album."

"And you think I'll believe that? Yes it may be burdensome but that's Taemin. He won't just get affected by something so lame."

"Now that you told me that, I think I know why."

"Why?"

"Haven't told him about Soojung."

"So you haven't told him about it? Goodness, the two of you work at the same company! In different groups, yes but you go to the same building and were only doors, floors and walls apart. It would also be lame for him not to know. Besides, he's also close with Soojung." For the first time in his life, Jongin couldn't understand why Taemin became like that.

 

Hours became days, days became weeks, and weeks became months. Taemin only showed up on their trips whenever Kai have schedule, and only went out with Moongyu, Ravi, Sungwoon and Kwonho. When Kai was available, he would always say that he have to record his songs for his new album or he would try to catch up with them in an hour or two, even if he never came.

 

Truthfully, Taemin was hurt but it's not just because Jongin has a girlfriend. It's not because he wanted to have a girlfriend too yet he's not allowed but he was hurt because he have known about it for a long time but Jongin never told him anything. Just when he thought that he was Jongin's best friend, he was wrong because Jongin kept it as a secret from him.

He wanted to get it off him so bad because it was absurd to be seriously get affected by those kind of news so when he was going to and from Japan and China to promote with SHINee, he ate a lot, went to play around, tried a lot of things alone, went to smoke, drink and just enjoy freedom so when he comes back to Seoul, he would just be the stress-free Taemin.

 

But then, Shinee would have to perform on the year end concert alongside EXO so Taemin won't be able to get away from Jongin.

SHINee performed "View" while EXO performed "Lotto" and "Monster" and it all ended well but Jongin was really anxious; he have waited for this day to come and be with Taemin again because he missed him a lot - it's been almost 5 months since his dating news broke out and it was the last time he got to see him. When Taemin was available, he have schedules. When he's available, Taemin was doing his activities with his fellow members. It frustrates him since they don't have time to meet and play when they usually see each other everyday.

 

The idol groups went around the stage to enjoy the music and the party started to keep the hype on the audience, but Jongin was still anxious.

"What's with your face?" Sehun shrugged since Jongin wasn't even smiling even if it's already party time.

"I'm just sleepy. Haha. My energy is drained."

"Wow? Kim Jongin also known as Kai's energy got drained? That's new. Ah!! Maybe you've spent a lot of time with Soo-"

"That's not the reason why, you ert. It's Taemin."

"TAEMIN? Why is it because of Taemin?!"

"He's too busy. I miss him a lot."

"Aw, you're so cute and sweet. Well, he's back and maybe he'll come to play with you again."

"I really hope so." But then from afar, he saw Taemin playing with Minho, Kibum, Suho, Chen, Baekhyun and their hyungs. At some point, Taemin was even hugging Chen. Jongin just took a deep breath and went to the other side of the stage so he would be near his best friend.

 

"Sehun.." Taemin sneakily went to Sehun's side, only a few feet from Jongin.

"Aish shut it, you two!"

"I know!! Keep quiet."

"Alright." Sehun placed his arms around Taemin's waist and when they were only a step away from Jongin, Taemin wrapped his arms around Jongin's waist and gave him a back hug.

"Jonginnie~" Jongin was so happy with that back hug and the only thing he did was to savor the moment. He closed his eyes and smiled, knowing that it was Taemin and he have felt that he miss him a lot, too. But he was slapped back to reality when that back hug didn't even last for 10 seconds. Taemin unwrapped his arms from Jongin's waist while he got both of his hands to keep it there, not wanting Taemin to go even if Taemin eventually did.

 

Maybe that's also what Taemin needed: a hug. Even though it was one sided, even if it didn't last for more than 5 or 10 seconds, it made him smile and feel better.

 

Jongin wanted more touch from Taemin and since that time, he knew that he miss Taemin so bad. Sadly, SHINee would have to go to a shoot for Saturday Night Live after the concert so there won't be any way for them to meet up on the same day. He knows that Taemin might already be tired if he'd call after the shoot so he just hoped that in the next days, they'd be able to talk.

 

But then it was also time for Taemin to film his music videos in Los Angeles. The hug have fueled him up but it only did something to his heart: that hug made his heart ache more since he was able to hug his best friend Jongin, even if he knows that somebody would hug him, especially he would love to have those hugs from that person instead of him. 

While he was in America, he danced even in the wee hours of the morning, knowing that it is afternoon in Korea. His friends sent a lot of messages and photos at the chatroom but he did not reply to any. He also cut down his cigarettes and finished only one box a day, but drank a bit more than what he could usually take. There were times when he found himself drunk at the balcony of his hotel room only when the sun wasĺ already burning his skin. He tried to get over his stress but smoking and alcohol didn't help. Moreso, his heart started beating painfully until finally, tears ran down his face.

Taemin never cried so hard in his life until he have acknowledged that his heart was aching. This was definitely not because of stress or pressure for his next album, but because of his relationship with Jongin. Technically their relationship was only friendship but deep inside, he wanted it to be more than that. When the news broke out that people thought that he and Jongin were dating, he wanted to blurt out "I wish we do, but we don't", but he just kept quiet and smiled when he was asked.

 

It had been a long battle with anxiety before Taemin accepted and acknowledged the fact that he likes Jongin, that he's jealous of Soojung and he's hurt since his closest friends were dating and he became a third wheel. But he really have to acknowledge everything for his feelings to eventually be ignored until it's forgotten. Maybe by the time he would go back to Korea or by the time that they'd be able to hang out again, he would be okay.

 

Taemin sent a message to Soojung and he wanted to meet up while she's in America and she cheerfully agreed especially she miss her Taemin oppa too and it has been hard for them to meet up because of their schedules.

"Oppa! What's up?"

"Hi! I'm doing well, busy since I'm still working for the album shoots, dance practices and stuff. How about you, Soojung ah? It's a good thing that you're here. I don't know anyone so it's hard for me."

"Haha it must've been hard for you. I could tour you around if you're free, oppa. And I am okay, Jess unnie is enjoying her stuff now. She's into clothes and accessories so yeah."

"Uhm may I ask? How are you and Jongin?"

"So you're asking me that instead of him, huh?"

"I just want to ask your point of view as well. You're also my friend. Well, my sister too."

"It's still a bit awkward for me to treat an older brother as a boyfriend but we're quite okay. Getting along well, yes but lately we haven't gone out again especially I am here. But all in all, we're good."

"It's nice to know that there are progress in your relationship. I mean, both of you were able to adjust from being close friends to siblings then to lovers. Now, I don't have to worry."

"So you're worried?"

"Uhm yeah."

"Worried for me or worried for him?"

"I don't have to worry for Jongin. He's grown up and he's a big guy, he is even bigger than me. I just hope that the two of you would be happy together. And I also wish that you won't hurt each other too much."

"I'll try not to be an ice princess. Hehe."

"Just be cool but not frozen."

"That's something I really miss from you, oppa. I know how hard it was also for you that you have to change."

"That was a long time ago.."

"But you and Naeun, you two didn't-?"

"She likes Jonghyun hyung but during that time, he was still with Sekyung nuna. She just have to deal with me during those times while waiting for hyung but it's fine."

"You never had any feelings for her?"

"Maybe the same with you. She's just a sibling and we're not romantically linked or anything."

"Yeah but you still got hated because of that prank. Anyway, it's all in the past. Ah! I'll cheer you up and tour you around. Uhm, are you on a diet?"

"A bit. Why?"

"That's fine. I think one meal won't hurt so much. Let's go!" Soojung guided Taemin around Los Angeles. They took lots of photos of each other, ate at In-N-Out, went to have a stroll at the Miami Beach and talked just like when they were trainees. Taemin was able to see the girl that Jongin chose to love and with that, he decided to just accept that fact and let his feelings go away.

 

"Taem oppa and I met up in L.A when I was there. I fed him burgers and fries. Haha." Soojung said as she met up with Jongin after a few weeks since their last.

"Taemin? But he must've been on a diet!"

"Eish, a few burgers and fries won't hurt. Besides, he could lose it by working out. Taem oppa seems to be a bit anxious and worried about us."

"Us? What did you talked about?"

"We talked about us, about how I am with you since we came from close friends to siblings to lovers. I told him that we're still awkward but we're trying to work things out. Maybe he's worried of how our friendship would be if something happens. And he was anxious, seems like he's envious that we could go date in public while he got hated when he came out on a stupid scripted reality show."

"Maybe it became a trauma." Now that Soojung have opened it up, Jongin also got sad for Taemin. He never even dated Naeun but he got hated for doing the show with her. Since then, he changed. No other girl were paired to him except for Brown Eyed Girls' Narsha in Match Made In Heaven, which was acceptable since they were only playing around and she's 12 years older than Taemin so the possibility of them dating was very low.

"Maybe the feeling came back to him when he heard the news. Maybe it's also my fault because I never told him about it, not even a single word about Soojung." Jongin just sighed with the thought of the mess he made.

 

After months of filming and preparation in America, Taemin went back to Korea and of course, Jongin didn't miss a chance to meet up with Taemin especially with what he found out through Soojung.

Jongin got some buckets of chicken from KFC near Taemin's unit so he could barge in and eat on the comfort of his best friend's home as a surprise and celebration since he's back from his trip in America. Luckily, Taemin was just chilling at home.

"Oh? Why are you here?" Taemin was surprised when the door opened by itself but sighed - he forgot that Jongin knows his unit password by heart.

"Taemin ah!! I miss you so much!! Ah I got some chicken! Let's eat! I know you have burned a lot of food since all you did in America was dance."

"Uhm thank you for this and for visiting but you don't need to. It's too much.."

"Eish Taemin ah, how could this be too much? It's just a simple snack time with you like the old times."

"Haha. Okay, just like the old times. Uhm do you have your car with you?"

"Nope. Manager hyung dropped me here a while ago."

"Alright, I'll send you back to your home later on then. Or perhaps, in Cheongdamdong?"

"Wait, are you kicking me out? Do you want me to go now?"

"Ah no haha. I'm just asking and so I would know which home would I send you to."

"Okay. You could send me home in Jayang-gu."

"Is Soojung not around? How come you don't stay on her unit anymore?"

"She's busy."

"Oh. I should've figured."

"Taemin ah, I'm sorry."

"Huh? For what?"

"That I am dating in public while you're pushed back by boundaries. I know that you're worried of me and Soojung especially everyone knows about it. I feel sorry for you, that you couldn't date in public unlike we do."

"Ah no, it's okay. Let's say that I can't date too since the one that I like is now in a relationship. The two of them seems to be happy and all I could do is to keep those feelings off because it won't do any good. I might as well have to move on with my life and get drowned with workloads."

"I'm really sorry! You should've told me that you liked Soojung! Bro code, man! I would've just chose someone else!"

"It's all said and done so I should just move on. It's okay, I'll be okay. I'll be over it especially I know that you're both happy."

"Was that the reason why you didn't want to play with me anymore?"

"Let's also say that I am thankful that my schedule was packed so I didn't have the time to play with you. I was thankful for it and even if I would get to choose between work and time to play with you, I would choose work. I