Chapter 7

Recommended song: Good Person (Yoo hee yeol/Toy)

Dance practices were naturally intolerable with Hanbin leading, yet they were now more unbearable for Donghyuk as a new hint of awkwardness was introduced to the practice room. Passionate about dance, Donghyuk was most of time fully immersed into sharpening his dance moves, but he could still see his leader giving Yunhyeong a weak, yet persistent gaze, and Yunhyeong with his head down avoiding Hanbin's stare. There were also times when Chanwoo would drag a dejected Hanbin with him to talk to Yunhyeong, which was followed by June and Jinhwan storming towards Yunhyeong, blocking Hanbin from Yunhyeong. They always ended up with Chanwoo comforting a hopeless Hanbin, who looked like a kicked puppy. Yunhyeong had never been known for his subtlety nor being able to conceal his feelings. Sometimes, during toilet breaks, Donghyuk would catch Yunhyeong looking longingly at Hanbin's back when Hanbin left the room for the bathroom, and Jinhwan and June giving Yunhyeong a disapproving look, showing their disappointment in Yunhyeong's behaviour. Based on Yunhyeong's constant stares at Hanbin, Donghyuk could see that Yunhyeong really wanted to talk to Hanbin, but there was something or someone stopping him from doing so. Donghyuk was not stupid-he knew that there was something wrong between the two: Hanbin and Yunhyeong, as well as amongst them and the other two: Jinhwan and June. At first, he thought that Hanbin and Yunhyeong had one their occasional fights that would be resolved by one of them approaching the other asking for forgiveness or Hanbin singing a song, which he had just written about Yunhyeong, to Yunhyeong; usually, the latter happened as Yunhyeong definitely had the upper hand in this relationship. However, this went on for weeks, without any one of them confronting the other or trying to talk things out. This time even their mediator, Chanwoo, seemed to be out of ideas and could not formulate an effective solution to their problem. What he found weirdest was Jinhwan's stance in this unknown problem since Jinhwan had always aligned with Hanbin in all situations, even including the ones where Hanbin was definitely at fault, yet this time, in the first time in forever, Jinhwan was on Yunhyeong's side. Maybe, after all these years, Jinhwan's hard feelings towards Yunhyeong had died down.

It was evident to Donghyuk that the problem was only worsening, yet he was not sure if he should intervene, which might further complicate things, or stand on the sidelines, waiting for the right opportunity to cut in.

'I think you two should visit America someday cuz you guys can go on dates there without getting judged and away from prying eyes,' said Bobby casually, who had just returned from a family trip to America, in the practice room.

His casual remark was responded by awkward silence that soon filled the room. Sensing the sudden change in atmosphere, Bobby looked up and scanned the faces of the others, who were stretching in front of the mirror. Donghyuk beckoned Bobby over and told him to be quiet and that he would fill him in on what had been happening in those two weeks.

'If you guys don't mind, I'd like to go out for a stroll to clear my mind,' said Yunhyeong, all of a sudden, breaking the silence, with a weird expression that suggested sadness.

Almost immediately after Yunhyeong passed through the doorway, Hanbin jumped out of the swivel chair and made his way to the door.

'Let go! What are you doing? It's now or never cuz he's been avoiding me as if I'm a virus ever since that happened,' hissed Hanbin, looking at Jinhwan, who was pulling at the hem of Hanbin's T-shirt.

'Jinhwan hyung, let Hanbin hyung go. Yunhyeong hyung needs him. I don't want to see him this down anymore. And, Hanbin hyung, please treat him right this time,' said June determinedly.

Under pressure, Jinhwan loosened his grip on Hanbin's shirt and let him go to Yunhyeong.

To June, seeing Yunhyeong content was his greatest joy. There was nothing he wanted more than seeing Yunhyeong smile genuinely, wake up from the endless nightmare he was in, and most importantly truly happy, even if he was not the reason of his happiness. Since their trainee days, he had already known that Yunhyeong was special to him, but, at that time, he did not know in what way. He always had the urge to protect Yunhyeong, keeping him away from the evils of the world, to make him laugh, and to make him smile. Although everyone had told him that he was in love with Yunhyeong, he still could not pinpoint what kind of feelings he had for Yunhyeong. June was not in denial of his feelings, yet he did not want to come to conclusions recklessly, especially when it involved Yunhyeong. His feelings for Yunhyeong had been a blur until the day Hanbin and Yunhyeong shared the big news about them being official. The memory of Yunhyeong smiling happily, with his eyes squinted, when he told everyone about him and Hanbin and how they managed to get together, was still fresh in his mind. Having known Yunhyeong for so many years, he had never seen Yunhyeong in such bliss nor seen him radiating so much felicity. At that moment, a lump was brought to June's throat; he wanted to shout at Hanbin for wrapping his arm around Yunhyeong's waist and tell the world that Yunhyeong belonged with him, yet he never had the confidence to do so. That was a moment of epiphany to June. He finally came to the realisation that he had special feelings for Yunhyeong, who he respected as an older brother, and was indeed in love with him, like what others had previously said. He turned his head away from the couple and looked at the other members instead, who were furtively throwing concerned glances at him. Seeing the worry in their eyes made June aware of how miserable and bitter he must have looked at that time. This made him despise himself more- not only because of missing the chance to confess to Yunhyeong, but also because of not feeling happy for his brothers, who had supported him throughout his singing career. The first few months of witnessing Hanbin and Yunhyeong acting all sweet to each other was undoubtedly an eyesore to June, yet, when June managed to cast away the pitiful feelings he had for himself and come to terms with reality, he was finally able to see how happy Yunhyeong was with Hanbin. Ever since, he had stopped wincing at the sight of them being touchy with each other and had started to smile and laugh along with them. June believed that love was selfless and did not always have to be reciprocated; he was willing to stay by Yunhyeong's side, be his knight in shining armour, and give Yunhyeong and Hanbin his blessings. Part of June kept telling him that it was morally wrong to stay in love with someone who was taken, yet the other part of him knew that feelings were arbitrary and erratic. The way he felt for Yunhyeong was not under his control, but there was one thing he could do to stay on the moral high ground, which was keeping a distance from Yunhyeong and keeping in mind that he would only be Yunhyeong's best friend, but nothing more. If he let his personal feelings get in the way of their relationship, he would break the group and make Yunhyeong and Hanbin, who had had a soft spot for him despite being a harsh leader, suffer unnecessarily, as a result of his selfishness. He did not want this to happen and would by all means conceal his feelings, and protect this relationship as long as Yunhyeong was happy.

Ever since that brawl at the hospital, June had not seen Yunhyeong, who was usually bright and energetic, laugh without a care nor pester other members with his dad jokes. Yunhyeong was usually in his room, with the door shut and sometimes locked. He did come out at times, but only for a short time and only when necessary. It was not like he had cut them off; he did make a great effort to act happy and join in conversations, yet they all seemed forced. Everyone could see that Yunhyeong was not in shape and was obviously not in the mood for anything. At first, they thought that Yunhyeong and Hanbin would make up as Hanbin had been doing literally everything he could to please Yunhyeong and to be absolved of his wrongdoings. However, it only went on without any signs of improvement.  Almost every night, Chanwoo, whose room was next to Hanbin's, could hear Hanbin listening to melancholy breakup songs and occasionally hear Hanbin blowing his nose, probably because he had been crying.There were also mornings when Yunhyeong showed up with puffy red eyes, treading heavily into the kitchen to make breakfast for everyone, except for Hanbin. Hanbin, who used to go to studio every day and stay there for the whole day, was constantly seen at home, around Yunhyeong, in spite of Yunhyeong's indifferent attitude towards him. Regardless of how hard Hanbin tried to talk to Yunhyeong, Yunhyeong never looked at Hanbin and ignored every advance he made. To be precise, he avoided Hanbin when possible and only talked to Hanbin when necessary, usually during dance practices, just to ask him to clarify dance moves. All of them knew that Yunhyeong was dying to talk to Hanbin. Sometimes, they caught Yunhyeong looking up, trying to hold back his tears, when Hanbin slumped against the wall, after Yunhyeong had rejected to converse with him. June, who had always been attentive to Yunhyeong, had noticed that Yunhyeong had not been eating as much as before and had slimmed down quite a lot these days. Yunhyeong was already very thin before all that happened, but now he was reduced to bones. Usually, the members knew their boundaries and would try to stay clear of their love affairs in order to avoid awkward situations. But, this time, they reached a consensual agreement that they had to poke their noses into this. Jinhwan was the first, who volunteered to talk to both Yunhyeong and Hanbin about the issue, as Yunhyeong always went to Jinhwan whenever he needed relationship and life advice. June wanted to help out, yet he knew that he was not the best at guiding people out of tricky situations and left the important task to Jinhwan, who had been Yunhyeong's therapist when Hanbin acted like a jerk to him. There was a time period when Hanbin would not cut Yunhyeong any slack and attack him with his sharp words. It was not deliberate, yet due to Hanbin's straightforward and playful character, Hanbin was never aware that his words had hurt Yunhyeong, who was touchy-feely and sensitive. With Jinhwan intervening, the problem was soon solved and Hanbin immediately toned down on his teasing and became more considerate to Yunhyeong.

However, this time, things appeared to be trickier. Jinhwan went in to talk to Yunhyeong as frequently as possible to offer him spiritual support, but after  every time he left, June could hear sobs that got louder each time coming from Yunhyeong's room. Clearly, the situation was worsening and no one knew the remedy to it. It was probably time to leave it to those two to solve their own problems.

'June, let's go. We've gotta follow them in case things get out of hand,' suggested Jinhwan.

June nodded in response, and the two trailed behind Hanbin, who was running towards Yunhyeong.