She smiled at her. Sinb was just so happy because Yuju smiled at her. Yuju was just too perfect: she was very smart, she was athletic and on top of that she was beautiful. Sinb had had a crush on her since the first day she met her. It was the first day of class. Sinb was new in the school and Yuju offered to help her the first days. Furthermore, she was her classmate. Then when Sinb got used to the new building, Yuju was no more spending time with her. Still, she was always there when Sinb had a question. Months passed and Sinb’s love for Yuju was getting stronger. She was always watching her from afar. And when Yuju was talking to her, Sinb was just frozen but so happy at the same time. One day, Sinb decided to make a move. She profited from the fact that the school was organizing a party, to ask Yuju if she was going to go. The latter nodded. 

When Sinb arrived at the party she was shocked. She had never been in a party before. The music was so loud and the room was so crowded, it was almost suffocating. Indeed when she joined the dance floor, she swore she felt very uncomfortable because of the proximity of the other people. She wanted to go home. She was going to leave but then she felt a grip on her wrist stopping her. She turned around and saw her crush just in front of her. Yuju was beautiful in that black dress that perfectly show her long milky legs. Her make up was emphasizing her big and mesmerized eyes. 

• Where were you going ? asked Yuju and suddenly Sinb felt shy. 

• I … it feels too hot inside, I wanted to go out to breath fresh air. lied Sinb

• You think it is too hot inside ? I think this is exactly why I love parties. 

• You love to party ? 

• Yeah … but with the exams I couldn’t do it often. Now that it’s over, I think I might spend all my nights to parties. What about you ? 

• Euh …. sure. I might do the same. Sinb was lying again but she couldn’t confess that she hated parties. 

• Great. Sinb let’s dance. she said while offering her hand to Sinb. The latter gladly took it. 

They danced and Sinb felt like she was in paradise. Yuju was dancing with her. At this moment, the only thing that Sinb wanted was that everyone else disappeared. She wanted to have Yuju all for herself. They danced and then Yuju offered to have a drink. Again, Sinb was discovering the taste of alcohol for the first time. Still, she didn’t want to drink a lot contrary to Yuju who drank too much. Sinb could guess that Yuju was drunk only by noticing how more tactile she was now. Indeed when they danced this time, Yuju put her hands on Sinb’s waist. Sinb was surprised by the sudden action but she was really enjoying it. She wanted this moment to last forever. With Yuju being here with her, she didn’t mind the loud music nor the crowd around her anymore. On the contrary, she was enjoying it. Yuju was just so hyped when she was drunk. They drank more. Sinb wanted to stop Yuju from doing it but Yuju was so happy that she let her drink. Then they danced again. But this time there were a bunch of guys that approached them. One of them take a move on Sinb but the latter clearly disgusted rejected him. So he went to Yuju and the latter let him dance with her. Sinb thought that Yuju let him because she was too drunk to reject him. She was wrong. The guy then began to touch  Yuju’s waist and got closer to her. Sinb didn’t like the view. She wanted to do something but another man prevented her from doing it when he also began to touch her. She tried to push him but it was impossible. He was too strong. But then someone pushed him. It was Yuju. She took Sinb’s wrist and led her towards the exit. Once outside she spoke:

• Are you okay ? asked Yuju. Sinb was still shocked by what has happened but she still smiled and nodded at Yuju. 

• Yes, thank you for saving me from him - Sinb answered 

Yuju was drunk yet she didn’t seem so. So Sinb thought Yuju was normal again. She was wrong. They were alone. Sinb couldn’t wait anymore, she wanted to confess her feelings. 

• I have something important to tell you. 

Yuju was looking at her with curiosity. Her eyes were almost red because of the amount of alcohol she had. She looked cute though. 

• Tell me ? She eventually said.  

Sinb felt so shy. She couldn’t talk. She was frozen. Yuju was still looking at her patiently. 

• I … I  … Sinb couldn’t speak while seeing Yuju so she closed her eyes:  I have feelings for you.  She managed to say. 

• What does that mean ? asked Yuju who seemed confused. Oh I see ! I get it. 

• I know you must be shocked. I don’t expect an answer from you. I just wanted to let you know about my feelings. 

• Wait, does that means you dream about me ? asked Yuju.

• What ? Sinb was truly confused. Euh … maybe but that is not the point.

• How am I in your dreams ? she asked so happy suddenly.

• Well, … Sinb didn’t know what to answer. 

• Am I kissing you ? added Yuju 

• I … oh … yeah. Sinb felt so awkward with that question. 

• So I bet you must be craving it. Yuju said while smirking. 

Sinb didn’t seem to understand. Yuju approached her and she grabbed her cheek with her fingers. She caressed them. Then she put her lips on Sinb’s ones. Sinb was frozen. She let Yuju’s lips roam on her. She opened her lips when Yuju kind of forced her to do so. Sinb completely surrendered to Yuju and her hypnotizing way of kissing her. It felt so good. Sinb moaned when she felt Yuju bit her lower lip. When Yuju started to on it, Sinb swore she was seeing stars. She didn’t want this moment to end. Yuju was a very good kisser. A tongue slid between her lips and Sinb moaned even more louder. Fortunately, they were alone. Sinb started to regain her composure. She tried to take the lead by pushing Yuju on the wall. The latter let her do so and even moaned when Sinb started to leave kisses on her neck. Yuju’s moan triggered a reaction between Sinb’s thighs. Desire. Yuju kissed Sinb while roaming her fingers on Sinb’s hair. Then she guided her towards her car. 

...

Sinb opened her eyes. It was dark. She couldn’t see anything. She felt she was in a bed. She thought it was hers. She was wrong. Her clothes seemed different. But what surprised her the most was the presence of someone beside her. There was a digital clock marking five a.m. 

• You are already awake ? asked the person.

• Who are you ? said Sinb. 

• Yuju, who else ? 

• Oh wait … but we were in your car ! 

• Yes but you know you felt asleep at three a.m so I took you to my home. 

• You managed to drive while being drunk ? 

• I was sober at that time, don’t worry. 

• Wait, I felt asleep ?

• Yes, I think the making-out wearied you. 

Sinb felt suddenly so shy now that she remembered what they had done last night. She should be happy about it. But she isn’t because Yuju was drunk which means that she didn’t want it. She was wrong. 

• Oh, Yuju about that I am sorry.

• You are sorry for what ? asked Yuju confused.

• Well we kissed and did other stuff, but I don’t know if you actually wanted it. You did it to make my dream come true. 

• I was wrong. said Yuju. 

Sinb felt hurt but deep inside she knew. She jumped out from the bed. She wanted to disappear. She didn’t want Yuju to see her cry. It was wrong to confess. She should have seen that Yuju has no feelings for her. It was obvious. She was never giving her attention as Sinb was giving her. 

• I shouldn’t have … added Yuju but Sinb cut her off:

• No, forget it,Yuju. I promise I will never do it again. 

Sinb left the room and the apartment. Tears were rolling down her cheeks and blurring her vision. But she didn’t care anymore because everything was over. She was wrong. She was thinking about changing school again. She knew she couldn’t see Yuju, never again, because that would bring her only pain. 

She didn’t know where she was. Yet, she didn’t really want to go home either. She was lost inside and outside. She didn’t even pay attention to people nor the car around her. She was crossing the road when suddenly she felt a force pushing her. She hit the ground and it hurted her but it wasn’t as painful as being rejected by Yuju. She felt movement around her but everything was getting burry. She was losing focus but that was already the case since she had left Yuju’s apartment. She felt forces shaking her body but she was getting more and more weak. She couldn’t even move a single member. Only her eyelids had enough strength to close themselves. The last thing she saw was the sad face of Yuju appearing in front of her. She thought she was dreaming. She was wrong. 

• Sinb, wake up ! Sinb !

She heard her screamed her name. Yuju was calling her. She was stuck between choosing to fight for staying awake or surrender to the undying rest. She was going to chose the second option but then:

• Sinb, don’t leave me! You can’t leave me already! Sinb ! I love you ! begged a crying voice. 

Sinb swore it was the most saddest voice she had even heard in her entire life. She couldn’t stand to hear it. So she tries to breath again. She had been holding her breath for so long, that now she felt as if the air was attacking her lungs when she managed to breath again. She opened up her eyes and saw Yuju with tears on her face. It was as if the reality had come back. A harsh reality. Yuju’s eyes softened when she saw Sinb’s eyes opened. But she became worried again when Sinb starting gasping for air. 

• Hold on, Sinb ! she begged

Sinb wanted to breath but it was so hard. It was as if she couldn’t receive a good amount of air. She wanted to give up so bad because it was so much more easy. Yet, Yuju was the reason she couldn’t give up. So she locked eyes with Yuju in order to stay awake. Then she felt a oxygen mask being put on . With the now reliving face of Yuju, she eventually closed her eyes and everything went black. 

…

Her face was illuminated, her sparkling eyes were shining like the stars in the sky. Yuju was just in front of her. They were alone. They were standing on the grass with around them, the endless sea. What were they doing in the Island ? Sinb didn’t even wonder about it. She was too focus on her crush’s face. The latter was smiling at her. Yuju approached her.

• Are you satisfied now ? asked Yuju.

• Well I am with you now. We are alone. Things couldn’t be any more perfect. answered Sinb. She was wrong. 

Yuju only smiled in response but this time it was a sad smile. Sinb didn’t see it. Yuju took her hand. She caressed it. Sinb felt weird because she couldn’t feel her touch. And when Yuju kissed her, she felt … nothing. Sinb pushed her. 

• Why Yuju ? Why can’t I feel something ? 

• It is not too late Sinb. reassured Yuju.

• What do I have to do ?

• Sinb wake up, please ! 

Sinb’s eyes flew open. The white ceiling welcomed her.

• You are awake ! 

She turned towards the owner of the voice and she was surprised to see Yuju. She thought it was a dream. She was wrong. When she was able to see more than Yuju’s face and the white ceiling she noticed medical devices and that she was in a bed. She still had this oxygen mask on her. She wanted to move her arms but she felt too weak. She looked at Yuju again. She was smiling at her even though she still looked worried. Sinb took her oxygen mask because she wanted to speak.

• Am I dreaming ? 

• No, Sinb it is the reality. Don’t worry the doctor said you will be fine soon. You just needed surgery. Now you only need time to heal. So take a rest. 

Sinb heard everything but there was a question still occupying her mind:

• Why are you here ? 

Her sudden question took Yuju out of her guards. She didn’t expect it. 

• Well, Sinb I am worried for you. I know your parents work abroad so they can’t be with you. I don’t want you to be alone. 

So Yuju was here only because her parents couldn’t be there. Sinb felt hurt. She was wrong. 

• I don’t want you to stay here. Please go. 

She knew she sound a little bit too harsh but she didn’t want Yuju to stay by her side if it was only by empathy. Plus, she was still hurt by Yuju’s rejection. Yuju was clearly confused and hurt. 

• Why Sinb? Why you don’t want me to stay ?

• Because it hurts. Actually, seeing you is way more painful that being hit by a car. 

Yuju’s eyes were watering. She was crying. But she didn’t move. Sinb closed her eyes. She couldn’t bare it. Suddenly she felt soft hands on her cheeks. She opened her eyes and saw Yuju. Her face was close. She has this serious face. She was a little bit scary.

• You’re lying Sinb. 

• Why would I lie ? I don’t want to see you.

• But you begged and even call out my name. 

• When did I do that ? 

• When you were sleeping. 

• You were in my dream, that’s why. But that changes nothing to the fact that I don’t want to see you. Because it only reminds me of you rejecting my feelings. I am sorry I know I have to accept your decision but still …

• You are wrong, Sinb. Yuju cut her off. You didn’t even let me explain myself. You left before I could even say a word. 

• Because I didn’t want to hear you rejecting me. 

• How can you know that I was going to reject you ?

• Because you said you shouldn’t have. 

• And then ? What did I say after this ? 

• I don’t know I was already gone. But …

• See ! You were wrong Sinb. 

• Let me tell you what I wanted to say. 

• Ok, go ahead. 

• I wanted to say that I shouldn’t have say that I wanted to kiss you this night only to make your dream comes true.

Sinb was confused. 

• I don’t understand.  

• Let me finish. I didn’t want to kiss you only in order to make your dream comes true but also to make mine comes true. 

• Wait said Sinb still thinking about the meaning of her words. You mean you wanted the same thing. 

• Yeah my dream was to kiss you. 

• Why would you dream about kissing me if you don’t like me. Was I just a challenge? 

• You’re wrong Sinb. But you’re still right about one point: I don’t like you. 

Sinb felt played by Yuju. It was not even funny. 

• I don’t like you because I love you. 

Sinb’s eyes widened. Yuju said she loves her. Why it sounds so familiar ? Sinb realized that Yuju had already said that just after the accident. So she wasn’t dreaming.

• Let me also confess my feelings to you, added Yuju. Sinb, the moment I first saw you I fell in love with you. You were so beautiful and so cool even though you were at first shy. You are not like the other girls that only want to spend times with me because they want popularity. You like me for you I am. And that’s what I appreciate about you. I have never dared confess to you because I wasn’t sure if you liked girls or not. I truly appreciated your presence even if I knew I wasn’t always with you for some reasons. Still, I regret but I want you to know that I was always keeping an eye on you. 

Sinb didn’t know what to say. She was very happy but she also felt bad because if she had let Yuju speak, the accident would have never happened. On top of that, she made Yuju cried earlier. She was wrong. So wrong. 

• Please say something, added Yuju. 

Sinb didn’t say anything and kissed Yuju. She hoped that the latter would understand her response by her action. She put all her regrets in her kiss hoping for Yuju to forgive her. Yuju seemed to have understand because she deepened the kiss and tried to be as gentle as she could be. Yuju broke the kiss but her forehead was still on Sinb’s one and her eyes still closed. 

• It’s ok, Sinb. Don’t worry. She whispered when she felt Sinb crying. I hope these are happy tears. she joked. 

Sinb chuckled between two sobs. 

• Sinb, I didn’t ask you, do you want to be my girlfriend ?

Sinb was just torn between her regrets and her happiness. She nodded quickly and repeatedly. 

• Yuju . Sinb eventually spoke. Yuju focused on her. 

• Yeah ?

• You were right. 

• About what ? 

• About the fact that I was wrong. 

THE END