Jimmy + his hoes

Jimoan: I have a confession to make

Succjin: I knew it was you who ate my food you piece of

Hoebi: What a great way to revive this gc

Jimoan: wtf no

Jimoan: it was your youngest

Succjin: JEON JUNGKOOK

Jeoncock: YOU PROMISED NOT TO TELL

Jimoan: yeah yeah I'm an untrustworthy . moving on

Jimoan: I just want you all to know that I love you guys so so much and I honestly don't know where I'd be without you

Jeoncock: probably somewhere better

Succjin: stfu my son is speaking

Jeoncock: umm I thought I was your son too??

Succjin: after eating the food I specifically told all you ers not to eat, consider yourself disowned

Jeoncock: whatever. I still have my other faithful and much cooler dad

Succjin: oKAY but can he cook like me?

Jeoncock: He may not be able to cook for his life, but at least he lets me eat dessert past 10

Succjin: Would you rather have more tummy aches or a dad who actually feeds you properly?

Jeoncock: oH SO NOW THAT NAMJOON HYUNG IS MY FAVORITE YOU SUDDENLY WANT TO ADOPT ME AGAIN?

Succjin: I'D RATHER RE-ADOPT YOU THAN LET NAMJOON TAKE MY SPOT AS FAVORITE

Moanie: Should I feel offended?

Hoebi: lol

Jeoncock: WELL YOU BETTER BE KISSING CAUSE RIGHT NOW, YOU'RE SECOND PLACE

Succjin: I WILL KISS YOUR SO HARD YOU'LL BE BEGGING ME TO STOP

Tongue Technology: I unmuted for this

Tongue Technology: I regret everything

Jimoan: ok we get it. we're a dysfunctional family; can I talk now?

Succjin: Please, go on. I can't stand dealing with Jungkook anymore

Jeoncock: What was that? I couldn't hear you over the sound of me not giving a

Succjin: You wanna go, punk?!

Jeoncock: send me your location

Jimmy: But it's Jimin time (๑◕︵◕๑)

Tongue Technology: Everyone, listen to Jimin

Jimoan: Thank you! I knew you'd be there to back me up, hyung ❤

Hoebi: oh? What do we have here?

Succjin: Is that a heart?

Moanie: Interesting

Jeoncock: Interesting, indeed

Tongue Technology: SO

Tongue Technology: what did you want to tell us?

Succjin: We see you, Yoongi. you ain't slick

Jimoan: ??

Tongue Technology: it's nothing, pls go on

Jimoan: okayyy well, I haven't been completely honest with you all bc the truth is

Hoebi: omg he's straight

Moanie: I'm sorry for your loss, Yoongi hyung

Tongue Technology: shut up Joon :)

Jimoan: uh no. I'm gayer than a -flavored, rainbow-colored lollipop

Jimoan: Maybe even gayer than that, but that's not the point. All you need to know is that I'm allergic to

Hoebi: can't relate

Jeoncock: we get it, hyung. you have girls and guys up your 24/7

Hoebi: biual goals!

Jimoan: aww don't be jealous, our sweet little Jungkook. You'll get laid someday

Jimoan: maybe

Jimoan: you know what? don't @ me on that

Jeoncock: first of all, you

Jimoan: imma stop you right there. My belongs to someone else, but I'm flattered

Jeoncock: ew

Jimoan: excuse you? anyone would be glad to own this fat

Jeoncock: again, ew

Tongue Technology: you'll understand the beauty of an like Jimin's one day, kid

Moanie: I'd love to keep talking about Jimin's (no, no I wouldn't), but I have class soon, and I'd rather we wrap this up now. The anticipation is killing me.

Succjin: ^

Jimoan: ok, soooo

Jimoan: I have another best friend

Hoebi: But I thought we were your only friends

Jimoan: RUDE

Succjin: wait, are you saying we're gonna have to fight for our spots as bff's now?

Jeoncock: i'd like to voluntarily drop out of that competition, please

Moanie: You may not. If I'm stuck with them, then you can bet your , I'm keeping you here with me

Jeoncock: *sigh* fine

Hoebi: i'm glad to know you love us so much

Tongue Technology: what's so special about your best friend that we don't have?

Moanie: This is what motivates me to stay

Jimoan: I mean, it's not like you guys aren't my besties, too,but this person is my literal soulmate, my other half, the sugar to my spicy , etc.

Succjin: omg that's so cute :')

Hoebi: Yoongi:

Jimoan: Aww hyung, why would you be crying?

Hoebi: Wouldn't you like to know

Tongue Technology: shut your horse looking headass face up before I ban you from ever seeing Holly again

Hoebi: you wouldn't

Tongue Technology: but I would

Jimoan: I don't really know what you guys are talking about, but I can promise you that this person is just a best friend. Nothing more, nothing less. 

Hoebi: Yoongi, thanking the Lord:

Tongue Technology: i'd skin you alive, but where's the lie?

Succjin: ooh Yoongi's finally admitting his feelings

Jimoan: what feelings?

Moanie: You poor, poor boy

Jeoncock a moment of silence for Yoongi's suffering, caused by Jimin's stupidity

Jimoan: that's HYUNG to you, you fetus

Jimoan: no but seriously, am I missing something?

Tongue Technology: oh would you look at that, class is starting soon. gotta go. bye

Hoebi: #dicksoutforyoonminspining

Jeoncock #dicksoutforyoonminspining

Succjin: #dicksoutforyoonminspining

Moanie: #dicksoutforyoonminspining

Jimoan: guys, please tell me what's going on

Jimoan: and wtf is a yoonmin?

Jimoan: guys?

Jimoan: we all know none of ya'll (except Joonie hyung) actually give a about class

Jimoan: fine.

Jimoan: ONE OF YOU ERS LEFT ME ON READ

~ ~ ~

Jeoncock: EVERYPONE SHUT THE UPA ND LISTEN

Jimoan: A simple "hello" would've been nice

Jeoncock: THERE'S NO TIME

Tongue Technology: Hi Jimin

Moanie: Bonjour

Succjin: Hola everyone

Hoebi: HOLA COMO ESTAS SHE SAID KONICHIWA

Jeoncock: no she said put a in it cause it's my time to talk rn

Hoebi: Jokes on you child cause I'd love to get dicked down and have a drink

Jimoan: "have a drink" iM

Succjin: I raised a bunch of hoes

Hoebi: We learned from the biggest hoe of them all

Succjin: We suddenly have one less chair at our dining table

Jeoncock: Put that chair back where it was cause your youngest hoe just found the perfect to fill that chair

Jimoan: How can a like you be a part of our hoe life??

Jeoncock: Can you like not attack me right now? thanks

Jeoncock: i'd rather we talk about that literal Adonis i just saw

Succjin: Pics or it didn't happen

Jeoncock:

Jimoan: Oh my god

Hoebi:

Jeoncock: Back off, I saw him first

Jeoncock:

Jeoncock: oH HE CAUGHT ME

Jeoncock: YA BOI'S GOTTA BLAST

Jimoan: Idk whether to laugh at you or enlighten you

Jeoncock: I WOULD FIRE SOMETHING ABCK AT YOU BUIT M BUSY RUNNING BEFORE I GET EBEN MORE EMBARRASSED

Jimoan: This is going to be fun

~ ~ ~

soulmates 4 life

My One: Minnie, the campus is so big. I think I'm lost :(

My Only: aww my poor tae bby

My Only: where are you? I'll come get you

My One: i'm by this cafe that's near a huge water fountain

My Only: alright i'm omw

My One: oh my god I forgot to tell you

My One: I just caught the cutest boy ever taking a pic of me, but he ran away before I could talk to him

My Only: did you, now?

My One: yeah, and he was so damn fine jfc

My Only: maybe I know him

My One: hopefully cause I'd love to meet him

My One: but oh whale, what are the odds?

My Only: you'd be very surprised