“It has been one year since the tragic death of Red Velvet’s Wendy. In honor of her impacts on the world, a memorial service will be held-”

Seulgi turns the TV off not wanting to be reminded of her friends death from outside sources, she already hears it in her own head every day. She hears it in the silence of every room. She hears it in the notes Wendy wrote her. She hears it in their music. She hears it in the rain. She hears it in the quiet sobs coming from the other members at night.

It has been a year, and yet, the pain hasn’t subsided. The pain in her chest, in , in her head, it hasn’t stopped. People usually can keep themselves from crying every night after a year has passed since someone’s death, but not Seulgi. Seulgi blames it on her crybaby reputation, but she knows that’s not the real reason.

Seulgi rummages through her desk, and finds the letter she wrote for Wendy after her being two months in a coma. Seulgi was hoping to give it to her when she woke up, but she never did. Seulgi unfolds the paper, and reads it again.

Hey Wendy,

If you’re reading this, it means you’re out of a coma, congratulations! After you being away for already two months now, I did some reflection and decided that nothing hurts more than a missed opportunity, so I’m writing you this letter so I never miss the chance again. I’m in love with you, Wendy. Not just like my best friend. I started getting feelings for you about two years ago, but I’ve always been too afraid to tell you. There were so many risks you know? We work together so if you didn’t feel the same way, or if things somehow didn’t work out that could cause a sticky situation. They were all excuses. Stupid excuses that held me back. Right now, those risks and excuses sound so small. I’d do anything to be able to tell you. My biggest regret is not telling you, that will always be my biggest regret in life...

Seulgi stops reading because she doesn’t think she can take it anymore. She leans her head back, tears filling up her eyes, and running down her face. The memory of the day Wendy fell into a coma playing back in her head.

They were driving in their tour bus to their next concert on their US tour. Wendy was falling asleep against the window, and Seulgi was staring at her. She loved the way Wendy looked when she was sleeping, so she couldn’t help it. That was when she saw a semi-truck come barreling towards their tour bus, with no intention to stop. Seulgi didn’t have time to think. All she could do was grab Wendy, and pull her into a hug in hope that somehow it would protect her.

Seulgi out for an unknown amount of time. When she finally became aware of what happened, she looked around making sure everyone was okay, calling out their names. Everyone responded, and Wendy was still in her arms, breathing, making Seulgi sigh in relief. The bus was flipped on its side, so Seulgi unbuckled herself, and adjusted herself into the upright position. She then unbuckled Wendy, and took her into her arms again. Wendy still wasn’t conscious so it was hard to move her around, but she eventually laid her on the side of the bus, which was now the floor. The door was on this side as well so they’d have to climb up through the windows to get out, but Seulgi’s body hurt so bad she didn’t even want to try. Seulgi wiped her forehead with her hand, making her realize that her hand wasn’t dry. She looked down at her hand to see it covered in blood. She starts panicking, and checking her body, finding no source of bleeding on herself. Her heart stops when she realizes it’s Wendy’s blood. She rushes down to Wendy, and starts checking her entire body for the injury. There didn't seem to be any wounds, until she sees a puddle forming around Wendy’s head like a red halo. It was so much blood.

“Guys. Hey, guys! Wendy is bleeding really bad from the back of her head! We gotta get her out of here fast! Where is the ambulance?”

“Seulgi, don’t move her! If she’s suffered head injury there’s a high chance that her neck could be hurt, too. Moving her ourselves is too dangerous,” Irene replies, trying her best to sound calm.

Seulgi takes off her jacket, and puts it under Wendy’s head hoping it would stop the bleeding a little bit.

It feels like forever before the ambulance arrives. By that time, Wendy is starting to look pale. The EMT’s work quickly to get her into the back of the ambulance. Seulgi begs them to let her ride in the back with them, but they insist she rides to the hospital in a separate ambulance so that they can help Wendy as much as they can with no distractions on the way there. She agrees so that Wendy’s precious time isn’t wasted on something like this. She stands, and watches them drive off with Wendy, holding her favorite yellow jacket that’s now soaked in Wendy’s blood.

At the hospital the doctors tell her, and the other members that Wendy’s skull cracked sending small fractures of bone into her brain, causing damage to the tissue. They said with brain surgery she may be able to come out of this completely fine. The brain surgery itself was successful, but she never woke up afterwards.

The accident also bruised up the others pretty badly, but nothing compared to Wendy. Yeri got a broken arm, and Joy’s clavicle shattered on her left shoulder. Irene and Seulgi didn’t suffer anything too serious, just extreme muscle soreness that lasted months.

Seulgi wishes it was her instead. She wonders if Wendy would think the same way as her right now, if it was Seulgi that died.

Seulgi gets a text from Irene reminding her that they are having lunch today. Seulgi wipes her eyes, and starts getting ready for her lunch date with Irene, Yeri, and Joy. She throws on a sweatshirt, and jeans, not really in the mood to dress up. She stares at the letter on her desk for a long time, unable to move from the heavy weight of sorrow. She picks it up, folds it again, and puts it back into the drawer of her desk. “I still love you, Wendy. I hope you know that. I hope wherever you are, you’re waiting for me.”