It’s not like she has never been with a guy before.

Park Sooyoung has never been one to get interested in guys, at least not like her past high-school girlfriends (girl space friends, she always makes sure to remind herself, there’s a difference). Sure, she’s taken a good look at one or two guys before, but the way she's heard girls talking about them is just too much. Is she underestimating boys? She can’t be, she even went off about a guy she “had a crush” at school in a radio show for god’s sake! He didn’t mean much to her, really, but her unnies seemed so impressed with her history she had to brag about it.

So when she becomes an actress it isn't a surprise at all she manages to get tangled in a love story. A love story she weaves herself… with straw… weak. So weak it wears off within two weeks. Her heart beats louder at his side: there is euphoria… and curiosity. The morning she tells him how she feels, he seems to reciprocate. She smiles in relief, she finally did something right. Right?

Well, at the first date he surrounds her with warm hugs and sloppy kisses that tastes like promises and as soon as she comes home, all Red Velvet girls are still up to ask her how it went. She laughs and says it was good, hiding her teary eyes with huge smiles and telling detail by detail. Inside, however, all she could think of is how something was missing. When he’d kissed her, she would try her best to enjoy it, but nothing. She felt nothing. It was frustrating. So frustrating she pretends to be extra tired and bids her friends good-night, with Yerim saying she would go to bed later so Sooyoung shouldn’t wait for her (“that little rascal, she knows I can’t sleep without her by my side,”- Sooyoung thinks).

Obviously, she doesn't sleep well that night. Yerim hasn't even come to their shared bedroom that night, has she? Sooyoung is so lost in her hopeless thoughts she can’t pay attention to anything else. She finally found a guy who is kind enough to maybe love her, he is sweet and passionate. Yet, she feels discouraged. She starts crying. A sudden panic rises in her chest just right in the middle of night. She gets up, but doesn't go to Yeri like she always does, even though they keep no secrets from each other, she feels like talking to a more mature person.

No noise coming from Juhyun’s room can be heard, as always. Joy is afraid to startle her leader by knocking at her door so late and kill their oldest member of a heart attack. She is also afraid Irene can listen to her thoughts in the middle of such silence and reprimand the giant for thinking of her as an elderly lady with a weak heart. But she still knocks. And knocks again, with a bit more strength. She tries to open the door- locked. “Damn it,” she thinks, “Unnie is sure gonna kill me now! As if she doesn’t hate me already…”

The first person Park Sooyoung puts her eyes on as soon as she joins S.M. Entertainment is Bae Juhyun. How unlucky of her! To have her beliefs drowned by looking at one single woman. A beautiful, beautiful woman. Most beautiful woman Sooyoung has ever seen, even more than herself, she adds. One of the most experienced trainees, she soon is informed, which means the beauty is not only a beauty, but talented. That fact alone says a lot.

In Sooyoung’s mind, it also says she was a fool to believe she could go to Seoul and debut just because she is better looking than most girls where she’s from and has a nice voice. Not only that! SM is full of talented visuals, future singers, amazing dancers and what not, so debut line is long and she is sure she is the last, if she were at the line at all. When she goes home that night, she sobs her dreams away babbling about some Daegu girl to her clueless mother. To this day the Daegu girl and Joy are not very close for some unknown reason.

Red Velvet has a perfect teamwork, but it doesn’t mean they are all the best of friends. Yes, they are like a family, but even in families not everyone is confidant of everyone. And Joy is definitely not very intimate with Irene. It is clear Irene has a much better chemistry with any of the girls besides Joy. It becomes clearer with Yerim finally being add