December 2013

The large room was full of people. The sound of the cutlery clashing against the dishes had ceased for a while and now the whole room was enlivened only by a background of chatter. It had been hard, she'd to admit it, but Lisa couldn't deny having had fun during those hours: she loved being able to help and, above all, she loved being able to spend time with other people outside of those she was used to. Not that she didn't like her eonnies and dongsaengs - indeed, they were among the people she loved most in the world - but somtimes there were moments when she craved to leave the Training Center, to meet and socialize with new people. That day, finally she'd archived that desire, even just for a little, and to make those hours even more special there was the fact that Jiwon was by her side for all the time. In spite of initially there was a bit of nervousness in her for that new experience, thanks to his guidance and closeness she managed to quickly settle without any difficult and even the differences of religion - that, even if she tried to ignore that fear, they worried her a little since when she'd agreed to take part in that event, 'cause she wasn't entirely sure how others would react to her - hadn't been a problem and, actually, they'd not even been considered. Everyone had welcomed her with open arms and Bobby had helped from the start, showing her, with energy and patience, all her tasks. Like this in a short time she'd managed to feel part of that new, big family.

At that moment they were at the end of the evening meal service. Both Jiwon and Lisa had spent most of the day there, but no matter how tired they were, they both seemed still full of energy. For about an hour they had lost sight of each other, busy with their occupations, and it was only when the long session of cleaning was over that the two reunited.

Lisa was running around a table in pursuit of two of the children who had stayed at the soup kitchen with their parents to help clean up, when an intruder captured one of her prey before her. Screaming and laughing at the same time, the child struggled for a few moments, trying to free himself from Bobby's grip and she took advantage of his brother's surprise to capture him too, earning her victory.

"This is not fair!" whimpered the child captured by Jiwon. He grinned and finally put him down.

"You didn't have to escape just from me " 
Lisa said, freeing also the second child.

"We want a rematch!" the little ones protested, but Bobby interrupted their requests by shaking his head.

"I'm sorry kids, I have to take her away for a while"

A chorus of complaints arose from the two children that still wanted to play, but Lisa bent over to ruffle to both of them their hair and promised to come back to give them their revenge as soon as possible, obviously bringing along her new ally. Full of expectation, the children calmed down a bit and stopped whining when the two guys left.

After being alone, Bobby led Lisa to the back of the building and they both sat on the floor. Curious, Lisa watched Jiwon take his phone out of his pocket and lift it in front of them; she was already preparing to take a picture together, convinced that this was his intention, when Bobby spoke.

"I want introduce you to someone" he announced, and just then the notice of a new video-call appeared on the phone's screen.

The confusion she had initially felt, soon gave way to the surprise and to the desire to run far away from there, when she read the name "Omma" on the screen.

"No, no, no, no!" she protested in hurry, placing a hand on Bobby's arm to lower it down. "Why?"

"They know you're here with me and they want to meet you..." he said, initially stunned by her reaction. "Come on! They will not eat you, they're miles away from here!" then he laughed, amused by her expression of pure panic.

"That's not the point!" she snapped, curling her lips in a pout.

"It's awkward, what should I tell them?"

"They already know enough about you, if it helps..."

"No, it's not helps at all"

"...so you just have to be yourself" he continued, like if he hadn't hear her words. "They are used to me, so they will not be too surprised by whatever you could do"

Lisa's expression of disappointment made quite clear that she didn't agree with him. Jiwon, however, didn't seem mind about that too much and just answered to her with one of his habitual smirk-like bunny smiles, before turning his eyes to the phone again.

"Ah, I lost the call... we have to call them back" he asserted, before looking up at her.

"Are you ready?"

"No" she honestly admitted.

He laughed briefly, then put a hand on her head as gesture of encouragement, like she'd done with the children just a little before.

"Is it possible that the only thing in the world that frightens you are my parents?" he asked jokingly.

"I'm also afraid to the ghosts" she pointed out, with a thin and cute voice.

"Oh, so you're only afraid to the ghosts and to my parents... I don't know why, but I feel like I should feel offended right now" he said, initially faking a serious expression, but then giving her a bright smile just a second later. "You know, they've always been curious about you. Your situation is quite similar to mine, so... by now it should be clear that my mother considers you almost like an another daughter away from home"

These words hit Lisa right in her soft spot; she stared at Bobby for a moment or two, still a little doubtful, but finally she gave in and, with a deep sigh, she nodded.

"Okay, call them..."

Satisfied, Jiwon quickly fumbled with his cell phone to call his parents, while on the other hand Lisa suddenly seemed to forgetten every single word of korean she'd learned in almost three years.

"Can I speak with them in English?" she suddenly asked to Bobby, who, meanwhile, had already lifted up the phone again in front of their faces.

"What?" he asked her, now really confused, but Lisa didn't had the time to answer.

The rhythmic and monotonous ring of the telephone suddenly broke off and the screen of Jiwon's cell phone lit up with new colors as Mr. and Mrs. Kim appeared. Despite being really nervous, it took only a few minutes to Lisa to be able to chill out and find a little of peace. On the other hand, Bobby's parents helped her very much in this mission: Mr. Kim remained rather silent for almost the entire duration of the video-call, but even at distance Lisa could feel the relaxed vibrations that he radiated from his whole person, really similar to the his son, while Jiwon's mother fed her need of maternal affection with the kindness of her ways and of the words that she addressed to her. Even if a part of her initially had a little difficulty in really believing the things that Bobby had told her a few minutes before, the kindness of that woman and that man didn't take long to convince her completely and that even forced her, in more than one occasion, to hold back the tears.

Nostalgia, gratitude and growing affection were the feelings that filled her completely at the end of that short meeting.

"Are you okay?"

Bobby asked her, once the communication was over. Initially her expression spoke more clearly than the words could ever do, but when she turned to him she gave him a sincere smile and just nodded. Despite feeling a bit 'upset, because of feelings that couldn't be defined completly positive, paradoxically she felt good, pampered.

"Yes, I'm fine. I really like them" she finally said, snatching him a new, happy smile.

"I'd no doubts" he commented, then he stared at her for a few moments before continuing. "It looks like you're about to cry, so I will not ask you to speak again"

"I'm not..." she protested, but since she knew herself quite well and he knew her even more, it seemed pointless to try to lie so shamelessly. With a sigh and a light laugh, Lisa just nodded again. "Thank you"

They stood in silence for a while, staring at the wall in front of them, then Jiwon, briefly clearing his throat, asked her: "Do you want to go back to the kids?"

"Yes, please" she immediately replied, clearly relieved.

Laughing, they both they stood up and went back to the main dining area.

They spent a couple of hours playing with the children and chatting with the other volunteers, and when they finally left the cafeteria, outside it was already dark. A light cold wind of imminent snow blew through the streets, still entirely lit by Christmas lights. Despite it was very cold, people had poured on the sidewalks and squares, did shopping and enjoyed that festive day cheered by the lively songs played at the corners of the streets.

Even Bobby and Lisa, who were patiently waiting for the next bus to return to their dorm, were soon surrounded and infected by that atmosphere.

"I don't want to go back" she sighed, looking up at the sky and watching the little cloud of condensation of her breath slowly dispersing in the air.

"We can stay a little longer here" he answered, turning to her. He was wearing a black mask and had lifted the hood of his sweatshirt - that sweatshirt - over his head, to avoid being recognized by any passing fans. It was incredible - but for Lisa, that also was a fan, not unexpected - the success that Team B had raise despite not having won, so that the security of being able to walk in the streets of Seoul without the risk of meeting their fans wasn't all certain even before their debut.

She wasn't sure how Bobby lived this situation, but what was certain was that for her every time one of the members was recognized was a great satisfaction, as if their victory was also her victory.

"Really?" she asked, her eyes widened with surprise and enthusiasm. "Don't we risk being recognized? Well, you..."

"Don't worry, around here it's full only of couples and families really busy with themself, it seems, so I don't think they'll care that much about of us"

Lisa certainly didn't made him repeat it a second time: once again full of enthusiasm and suddenly without any trace of tiredness, she jumped up and held out her hand to invite him to do the same. He, laughing, accepted the invitation immediately and, without even realizing it, they even held their hands for a few minutes while they were moving towards the nearest square.

Walking side by side, to the eyes of a stranger those two young people wouldn't have looked very different from all the other couples that were on the street that day: they laughed, they teased each other as they were used to do and continued to entertain themself with casual chatter, small spite and songs sung sometimes in a low voice, sometimes with a louder tone to join the choirs they met during their way. For those two trainees, who had been willing to shut themselves up for most of their days between the walls of the training rooms, an evening like that - rare despite the independence they still enjoyed, not having officially debuted yet - was equivalent to a delicious taste of freedom.

"Hot chocolate!"

Lisa announced all of a sudden, stopping next to a big Christmas tree set up in the middle of the square.

"Hmm?"

"I want a hot chocolate! It's the only way to make this Christmas getaway really perfect"

"Hot chocolate..." he repeated, also enticed by that idea. "Call! Let's go!"

They didn't want to risk taking a seat at a bar table - if someone had recognized them, their innocent date between friends could have been misunderstood due to the mood of that day -, so Lisa offered to going to buy a couple of take-away cups, while Jiwon took a seat in a secluded corner of the square, where they wouldn't have caught too much attention.

"Ah! Now I'm in peace" she sighed with satisfaction few minutes later, after she taken the first sip from her cup. She was sitting cross-legged on the bench, a pair of dark mustaches of hot chocolate upon her lips. Bobby didn't even bother to try to not laugh.

"You're worse than a child"

"Look who's talking, ajossi!"

"Don't you like my mustache, hyung?" he , pretending to curl a corner of one of the mustaches. Lisa couldn't help but burst out laughing.

"Oh yes, you look like a noble old man right now"

Neither of them bothered to wipe their face off the chocolate, since they would eventually return with the next sip, and their conversation went on between words and amused laughs.

"It would be nice if the others were here too..." said Lisa at one point, her eyes that, enchanted, admired the lights of the Christmas tree.

"Us two alone here during the Christmas day, may seems a little strange" answered Jiwon, looking around too. Except for the few families still on the street, the people who were still strolling were holding hands, exchanging gifts or sharing snacks and drinks. More than still in the reality, it seemed to have ended up in a scene of a drama.

"Are you uncomfortable?"

Lisa asked him, turning at him to look at his face curiously.

"No, actually... and you?"

"Not at all" she answered with a smile.

From her point of view, she understood the fact that their present situation could be equivocal to some strangers, especially considering the great amount of time they already habitually spent together since they began to get more closer, but she couldn't be influenced by opinions that others might have of them. Whenever they were together, even doing nothing like that evening, Jiwon managed to give her peace and comfort: when they did stupid things together, he could make her laugh every second, meking her feel joyfull and without any thought, but there were also moments when they simply relaxed together, moments where instead of giving vent to their energies as they used to do in the company of the other members of their respective groups, they enjoyed the silent mutual company. She was used to being alone for long periods before found him and the same was true for him, but spending time together they had discovered that no matter how used to the loneliness they were, it was way more pleasant to be alone together even without speaking. A situation like this, therefore, could never make her feel uncomfortable.

Suddenly, Bobby started to laugh and, without even knowing why, an amused smile also blossomed on Lisa's lips.

"What's wrong with you?"

"I was trying to imagine Hanbin here in our place"

At that point, even Lisa couldn't hold back a laugh.

"I can imagine his sulky face as he watches all the couples passing by"

"When will it be me? Hey, you two aren't a little too much close? Find a room!" started to play Jiwon, perfectly imitating the tone of his best friend. The sound of Lisa's laughter, already not very discreet of his own, grew in an embarrassing way, but he seemed didn't even notice it, perhaps by now too used to hearing it for not considering it pleasant. In truth, although Lisa didn't know, that was a sound that Jiwon had always appreciated, even when he hadn't had yet the opportunity to meet her.

"Please stop or I'll spill all the chocolate"

"I'm sorry! But I almost regret not taking him with us..." he remarked, but, after thinking about that for a second, he added: "almost"

"At first it would have been fun, but in the end we probably would have throwed him in the fountain to keep him quiet"

"You're right... Sometimes I hope he'll find a girl soon, so he can stop complaining"

"We could recommend this place to him when this will happens"

"Yeah, it's really nice... one day we could come here all together, maybe everyone of us with his or hers soulmates on the side"

"I think you're starting to resemble Hanbin-oppa a little bit too much now" laughed Lisa, making Jiwon doing the same.

"Don't you like this perspective?"

"You as another version of Hanbin-oppa? I love him, really, but I think that just one is enough"

"Not that" he laughed. "The future one, I mean..."

"Oh!" she take the last sip from her cup, before answering. "Yes, I think... but not for a too close future"

Bobby, that was taking snother sip of chocolate too, looked at her for a long moment, silently waiting for explanations that, however, didn't arrive.

"If not now then when?"

"In a long time... I think"

Jiwon initially didn't say anything and spended few moments just stared at her, while she stared at her cup of chocolate. Don't passed a lot of time, however, before that he finally putted togheter his thoughts and started talking.

"If and when we'll make our debut we'll not have time or opportunity to do these things, nor could we ever do them with the same freedom we have now... I think we should enjoy this period and make these experiences, as long as we are still allowed to do it"

"This way of thinking may could be applied to you, oppa, but not to me" she replied, lifting her eyes. "I can't deny that an atmosphere like this make me fantasize too, or that I don't want to make certain experiences, but there is something more important to me than this..." in front of the curious look of Jiwon, Lisa raised a corner of her lips in a slight smile and then continued. "I didn't come all the way from Thailand and left home to find a boyfriend in Korea or be distracted by adventures worthy of a drama... Despite going out with someone would be nice, it would also take away too much energy and time that, instead, I prefer to devote to what I need to realize my dream... I know it may seem stupid, but I think you can understand me..."

Bobby stayed silent for a few moments, then finally nodded.

I can't say I totally agree, but I understand it. Hard work and no distractions"

"Yes, exactly. No distractions" she nodded, returning Jiwon's smile and lowering her gaze a little. In doing so, she couldn't notice the bitterness - immediately erased - that crept into his gaze, nor he could see the shadow of regret that for a moment went to darken the brightness of her face.

Every emotion was suppressed by both the guys, when Jiwon again started their conversation with a slight laugh.

"I'll have to tell Hanbin to placate his fantasies, then" he said, grinning to Lisa's confused gaze. "The action figure of Conan that you gave him before the end of WIN wasn't a good move if these were your intentions from the beginning"

Lisa's eyes widened in surprise, as she began waving a hand in front of her in a vehement gesture of denial.

"It was the surprese toy of my kinder chocolate! It wasn't..." she would have continued to giving explanations, if she hadn't recognized in the sneer of Jiwon and in his look the expression that he usually had when he made fun of her. "Ah, are you're serious?!"

"The panic on your face is priceless!"

"It's a lucky for you that my chocolate is already over"

"I was just waiting for you to finish it" he confessed with another, innocent bunny smirk.

At that point, Lisa snapped forward and tried to grab his cup, still half full of chocolate. Intercepting her movement, Bobby jerked back, stretched an arm toward her to keep her still and away from him, and with a long sip drained his cup.

"But it was really hot!" she protested, but he straightened his shoulders and gave her a proud look, an eyebrow fiercly raised.

"A man can..." he began, but a cough stopped his reply. Now it was Lisa turn to grinning, but he pretended to ignore her. "I was saying... a man can tolerate this and more"

"Sure" she nodded sarcastically, then stood up. "Let's go look for some water, Superman!"

Jiwon stood up, a bit laughing and a bit coughing from the throat still annoyed by the unexpected heat. Both began to wander through the cold streets of Seoul and continued to do so for a long time, savoring until the last drop the freedom that they had been granted for that evening. They didn't hurry back to their dorms even when it began to snow, and rather, this event make them stayed out even longer, watching and playing with the snow, no longer facing serious topic and simply enjoying the moment.

In the future, remembering that evening, Lisa will think that if she could go back to the past, she would never reveal those thoughts to Jiwon and Jiwon, instead, would think that from those same thoughts he should never have let himself be influenced.

*****

And here is the second part of the chapter! I hope I haven't made you wait for too long and that you can enjoy it!

Instead of repeating the usual things that we all now, I'll only say what I thought during the writing of almost the entire chapter: "SORRY HANBIN, I LOVE YOU!"

The portrait I made of him through the words of Lisa and Jiwon may not look as the better, but I swear it was all written with love!

Since once in a while I want to try to be brief, I'll go directly to the greetings...

Thank you for reading this chapter, see you next time!

🖖 bye bye 🖖

P.S.: congratulation to mummy Lisa and daddy Junhoe for their new puppies, they are adorable!