October 2017

Finally a moment of break. During the last months, the preparation for his first solo album, the official release of "love and fall", the promotions in the variety and the music shows with and without the other iKON members and the commitments with his group had occupied entirely his time, barely leaving him with the few moments of rest he had managed to carve out with difficulty between one recording and another. This situation had been going on for a long time, but finally, after an amount of time that not even he could well quantify, a free day was finally made on his agenda. And he had decided to spend it in one of his favorite ways: relaxing and sleeping, with just a few moments of pause to feed himself or exchange a chat with his friends.

It was only in the evening that she had appeared, dragging him out. She hadn't taken him that far, though. Once in the elevator, their destination had become quite clear and that's where they were at that moment, both sitting side by side, their backs against the wall and their eyes closed while the light autumn wind and the music coming from the earphones cradled their senses. For years now, the dormitory roof had become a sort of peaceful refuge, where they could escape from unwanted thoughts and, above all, from the managers' eyes when they became too oppressive. In this situation, even listening once again his own songs wasn't for him a source of embarrassment or annoyance, above all because he was sharing this quiet moment with one of his closest friends. For some of their comrades it was still strange to think that two of the noisiest people in the entire dorm loved to spend moments like that, but for them it had become a pleasant habit: they needed to recharge from time to time and they took every opportunity to do it together if both were in the right mood.

It was only when the Alien's notes began to play in their ears that Bobby finally changed his pose to briefly glance at Lisa. She was the first person to whom he had shown the verses of that song, when no melody had been matched to the words yet, but since when the final version had been recorded he hadn't had the chance to observe her reaction. He still remembered her eyes wet with tears when she first read the lyrics and now Bobby couldn't but help wondering if the song could convey to her the same feelings in its full version.

He couldn't study her expression for a long time, however, because about halfway through the song Lisa's eyes suddenly widened, surprising him and forcing him to look away. Fortunately she didn't seem to have noticed that he had been watching her for a while, since that when she started to speak she didn't even mention that event.

"You know, I read interesting theories yesterday" she suddenly said, turning to him. Needless to say that Bobby was already worried, a sudden outset like this by Lalisa Manoban didn't bode well.

"About... what?" he ventured to ask, even if he could already sense the answer.

"About you" she said indeed, confirming his fears. "Precisely on your songs. Or even better, on the protagonists of your songs"

"Holy sh..." he began, looking up at the sky with exasperation. Fortunately he managed to stop just in time so as not to curse. "I don't want to hear them"

"Hey, don't curse! I'll tell it to your mom"

"I didn't" he snorted. "And I still wonder why I allowed you to meet her. You should be my accomplice, not hers"

"You already know the answer" she said and he sighed.

"So... who are the possible candidates?"

"Didn't you say you didn't want to know?"

"You're right, let's change the subject..." he began, but Lisa interrupted him even before he could finish the sentence.

"However, they always talk about the usual ones"

"You and Jisoo?"

"Exactly, but this isn't my point"

"I'm afraid to know what is your point, then..." he mumbled and her expression confirmed that he had every reason to be scared.

"My point is that I've known you for ages now and some things don't escape me, even if it doesn't seem so. I've watched you in the last period and even if they can't know it, I think your fans are right... there's someone behind those songs"

If you had been on that roof that evening, you could've seen a specimen of Kim Ji Won become suddenly pale and risked a heart attack. Fortunately, while she was illustrating her theories worthy of a fake Sherlock Holmes, Lisa had turned to another direction to make her revelation more theatrical and therefore she had missed that show. But don't think you were the only one uncomfortable at that moment, Mr. Kim; if you could have read in the mind of that girl, you would have easily understood how silly she felt for giving voice to all that foolish speech to get the answers to those questions that had been hanging around in her mind for a long time. And certainly not just because she had read some comment about it.

"And I was right to be scared..." finally Bobby answered, after a deep sigh. Every trace of the panic had just been erased and in its place now there was nothing but an annoyed expression.

"Come on, we've been friends for years and we've never talked about this subject, doesn't it seem strange to you?"

"No, because there is absolutely nothing to say"

"It's really hard to believe, you know? If there's or there's been someone you can say it to me, I'm one of your closest friends, I'm entitled to certain information!"

"No."

"Please..."

"Why do you let yourself be influenced by certain rumors?"

"I haven't been influenced by those rumors, rather I'm just curious"

"Bad idea"

"Tendae"

"What does this have to do with this?"

"The lyrics are really, really accurate! The references are really, really accurate!"

"It's the song with the least realistic references of all the others!" he replied instinctively, driven more by despair than by common sense. Common sense... if only he had used it, would've spared that accusing finger that promptly Lisa pointed at him after his answer. Damn girl.

"Ah-ah, so I was right, there are specific references!"

"OH MY GOD"

"Bad boy"

"You push me to commit sin"

"Ouch, it seemed really ambiguous" she muttered, pretending to shiver; instead of answering, he just grinned. This low blow, however, wasn't able to distract her from the main topic. "But forget it. So what are these specific references?"

Frustrated. This is the word that could best describe what Bobby felt at the time. Not only the topic of that conversation was really uncomfortable, but apparently the references he feared were too obvious, especially for her, had gone totally unnoticed. Even he didn't know whether to feel relieved or saddened by this discovery.

"I will not tell you"

"Oh, come on..."

"No"

"Okay, but I have a theory"

"Today you really frighten me"

"Dara. Oh!, or your friend... mh, what was her name?"

"Chr-"

"Bobby!"

"What's wrong with you?"

"Noona!"

"Which part of 'is the one with the less precise references' have you forgot?"

"That's right..."

"Do you think I have time to have a 'friends with benefits' relationship with someone?"

"Why not?"

"I should be used to your answers by now, but for some reason you continue to surprise me"

"Honestly, I don't see anything wrong in this and I don't think it's a type of relationship that requires too much time and effort... maybe"

"I'm not going to talk about this with you"

"It wasn't the speech I wanted to do anyway"

"You don't know how much I want to curse right now"

"Why is this subject shaking you so much? We're friends, friends talk about these things"

"Because... because you're frustrating. Why did you think about Dara anyway?"

"You get along with her really well, you've met her often for various programs, she's beautiful and super cool, she's one of those women that I would dedicate a song to if I were you"

"You're terribly ambiguous"

"You know how I think"

"I know. It's not her anyway"

"Woh, then is there really someone?"

"Yes" his prompt and decisive answer manages to silence Lisa, who, amazed, can't do anything but stare at him, her eyes wide open and her lips parted. "You insisted so much to know it and now you don't say a word?"

"You shocked me" she answers with extreme honesty.

"I found a way to keep you quiet for a while"

"You wouldn't be able to endure my silence for a long time."

"It's sadly true" sighs Bobby.

The silence surrounds them for a few moments, then finally Lisa decides to resume the speech from where she had left it.

"So, who is it?"

"I can't tell you"

"Here we go!"

"It's complicated"

"What's complicated in a name? Is her a foreigner?" for that joke, sadly close to the truth, Lisa gained a stink eye. "Okay, sorry"

"It's the situation that's complicated"

Suddenly, Lisa's expression became more serious, as serious as Bobby's expression had become.

"Why is it complicated?"

Initially Bobby didn't answered. He remained silent for what seemed to be more than a minute and, for her part, Lisa didn't want to hurry him and ask more questions. Unable to remain completely still and just staring at him, however, she put her head on his shoulder and delicatly his arm to try to console him. After a while, Bobby closed his eyes, sighed and finally decided to speak.

"What would you do if the person you like is also the person thet one of your dearest friends likes?"

Surprised, Lisa straightened up to be able to look at him, her hand that absently ended up practically on top of Bobby's hand, almost snatching out of him a moan of exasperation.

"How close are you to this friend?"

"He's practically my brother"

"Ouch..." she said, biting her lower lip. "And how much do you like this girl? "

"I wrote almost an entire album about her"

"Double ouch"

"I told you, it's complicated"

"Are you in love with her? Really, really in love?"

"I think so, but... I also love her like a sister"

"Noona!"

"You're not helpfull!" he snorted and she immediately raised her hands in surrender.

"Sorry... she know that you're in love with her?"

"She has no idea"

"I see..." biting her lips thoughtfully again, Lisa leaned back against the wall, moving slightly away from Bobby; once again he didn't know whether to be happy or sorry for it. "We have already talked about this in the past, but I will ask you this question again: which one matters most to you, love or friendship?"

Suffering, Bobby took a moment before answering: "Friendship"

"So the resolution of this complicated situation is sadly obvious" she concluded with a sigh. "I'm so sorry, Oppa"

"I'm a musician, I live of unrequited love" he said, trying to smile, but only managed to stamp a bitter smile on his face.

"The songs about the requited love are more beautiful"

"Not in most of the cases" he laughed, softened by her pouting.

"If it's your best friend to write them, yes, they're always more beautiful"

"Stop it, otherwise I could start writing songs for you too"

Laughing, Lisa rearranged herself in the previous position, her head resting on his shoulder.

"I know it's obvious, but if you ever want to talk again about this, I'll always be ready to listen to you"

"Yes, it's obvious, but it's also nice to hear that"

Softly, and with a hint of hesitation, Bobby took her hand; as always, she returned her hold without hesitation. "Thank you"

"By the way, that dear friend..." she began, throwing a guilty glance at him. Even before she could finish her sentence, Bobby promptly interrupted her.

"Don't dare ask questions!"

"It was to contextualize!"

"It's nobody you know"

"All right, all right. You have too many friends, I can't even try to guess..."

"I'm so sorry, you'll have to live with the doubt"

Lisa snorted and looked at him badly; he laughed briefly and with his free hand put the headset back in her ear. The song that was playing was "Houlp!", but despite he knows that was one of her favorite, he changed it in "Lean on me". She didn't complain: looking at the view, she smiled, she closed her eyes and tightened his hand a little more, trying to ignore the hollow ache that from several minutes stungged her heart.

*****

Hello! Here is the author again!

As always, I don't have much to say lol the only thing I want to emphasize is that everything I wrote about Bobby's songs (as references etc.) is all my invention and that as far as I know "Tendae" (one of my favorite songs, by the way) could be the most "real" of all the songs of his album or not, I think we will never know this with certainty.

Anyway! Thank you very much for reading this chapter and I beg you, as always, to forgive my mistakes... I am trying to improve, but I am rather slow.

Thanks also to all those who have read or will read in future the previous chapters and who is following or will follow in future my story! I will try to update as soon as possible, then "WAIT FOR MEEEEE", I will try not to disappoint you.

Today I will say goodbye to you with Bobby's favorite emoticon, so...

See you at the next update,

bye bye 🌊🌊🌊