It was raining on a spring evening in the city of Almaty in Kazakhstan. The thunders were roaring in the distance, and it was over.

 

She had lost everything.

 

Her curly hair was rustled by the wind; not a long time ago, it bothered her so much, but now, she didn’t feel anything. She shook because it was cold, but that was it.

 

There was nothing else here, at this place.

 

She stood at the rooftop, wondering if she could just let go of everything. Would it hurt, the end of that flight? Would the wind protect her?

 

She wished it wouldn’t.

 

That wouldn’t have been something he’d approve of.

 

He…

 

“Beautiful,” he whispered into her ear in that Arizona forest. It was so windy already - did he have to direct it at her, too? She didn’t dare protest, though, because she would’ve endured anything just to be able to hear his laughter.

 

“Hmm?” she hummed, turning to look at his now-brown hair. He’d explained how the color changed according to their connection to The Tree of Life - as their energy levels changed, the color of their hair changed too, back-and-forth, seemingly without any pattern.

 

He grinned at her as he moved his hand in an attempt to make the wind brush her hair away from her face. “The Eclipse is going to happen soon, beautiful. If Kai doesn’t get his powers back until then, or if we don’t find Kris…”

 

He stopped for a second, closing his eyes, and the smile disappeared from his face. She knew what he was implying, so she started whimpering as she shook her head, but he put a finger on her lips.

 

She knew he needed to say his next words - why were there tears in her eyes already?

 

The bells had stopped ringing a long time ago, yet they kept echoing in her head, in a morbid melody that seemed like it would never stop.

 

Her shawl should’ve been protecting her from the wind, but it seemed to be seeping into its ends, making her shudder every once in a while.

 

She clutched the bracelet in her hands - it was still warm. It was the only thing left to remind her that what had happened was real; it was the only thing left to reminded that he’d ever existed in the first place.

 

He…

 

“Do you believe in reincarnation, Aeri?” he had asked her, his whole body turned upside down on the couch in that Berlin apartment. They were waiting for Xiumin, assigned to try to recover his memories, since Xiumin was close to Baekhyun and Suho thought he’d remember him first.

 

“No,” she started, as she ruffled his now-brown hair. She would’ve been concerned for him, had she not given him a bit of her own powers a while ago; he reassured her that he wasn’t running low on energy just yet. She struggled not to think about the moment when that happened. “You know I’m a Muslim, and we don’t believe in being reborn. Instead, we believe in destiny; it’s like this complex riddle that we’re trying to solve our whole lives, and as we keep running from things, they keep happening to us, therefore fulfilling our destiny.”

 

Baekhyun nodded at her - there was still a bit of light left in his eyes from the last time she’d touched the back of his neck. She loved the fact that she could make him feel that way, even if only for a short while.

 

“I’ve always been running from myself,” he whispered as the light-induced eyes focused their gaze on her, washing her in the color of gold. “But now I have other fears. Do you think it’ll come for me - my fear of losing you?”

 

Just this morning, everything was fine - just a couple of minutes, her world was still revolving around its axis safely. Now it had stopped, like a planet which had no star left to revolve around.

 

What would she do now? What was she supposed to do now?

 

They’d finally managed to bring them all together - all ten of them, with Luhan and Kris still being trapped by SM, God knew where.

 

It felt like they’d been laughing and playing hide-and-seek on that rooftop, getting tangled in the drying laundry and kissing at the wind. She’d managed to touch her power with him standing right behind her, guiding her hands like he’d done such a long time ago.

 

Who would guide her shaking hands now?

 

“If that happens, I’ll need you to do something for me, beautiful,” he completed as he opened his eyes, and though he was smiling, his eyes were rimmed with red.

 

She sobbed and shook her head. “Don’t make me listen to this, please, because it won’t happen. We’ll find them in time, and we’ll all make sure you get your energy back.”

 

He continued smiling at her, even as the wrinkles around his eyes deepened. She was making this harder for him - why did he have to make it hard in the first place?

 

She intertwined their hands, squeezing his tightly, as if it would somehow reassure him that her words were true. She could not even think about other possibilities - they would go back on time. There was no other acceptable scenario.

 

Why did the tears start rolling down his cheeks, then?

 

She put her head in her hands, falling to her knees.

 

Why did he let go of her hand? If only he’d held on… Even if they were both taken away, at least they would’ve been taken away together.

 

She did not know how or why they showed up, but Kris and Luhan were there in an instant, and it didn’t matter that she was holding his hand tightly.

 

It didn’t matter that Luhan had looked at her apologetically. It didn’t matter that they didn’t want to do any of this; they’d still done it.

 

And now what would they do to him? They knew how broken he was already - she didn’t want to think about what would happen if he was tortured again.

 

Would he lose his memories again? Would he only remember the darkness, forgetting about her?

 

“I think, if I’ve lived before, I must’ve met you,” Baekhyun said as he slowly moved his fingers up her arm. “I can’t imagine that I’ve ever lived a life without you, no matter which form I was in.”

 

She rolled her eyes; he was really so dramatic sometimes. “Yeah, because a bee would feel so sad and lost knowing her counterpart from another life wasn’t without her.”

 

He laughed, and suddenly, the ridiculousness of the conversation did not matter anymore. He didn’t laugh often, so what she was seeing and hearing now was a blessing other people almost never got to experience.

 

“I think I’d spent all my lives chasing after you. All the suffering I went through - all the suffering I maybe will go through - they will be possible to endure if I get to be with you in the end.”

 

His voice was playful, but his eyes revealed a whole different story - he believed every single word he’d said, and suddenly she felt full of some unknown feeling that threatened to glide over her.

 

“Baekhyun…” she whispered slowly, feeling thankful for having met such a wonderful person - for having been that lucky to have been able to get to know him, to understand him, to fall in love with him, to somehow, miraculously, have him fall in love with her, too.

 

When they’d found Tao drinking coffee and reading newspapers casually in Barcelona, she’d felt so happy. Tao was, perhaps, the most unstable out of all of them - he and Kris shared a brotherly connection that ran deeper than what they could understand. When he remembered, he would’ve felt so sad and crushed.

 

Now, she cursed his name as she sobbed at the rooftop, wanting to take a leap into the empty space, but not being able to because of him.

 

“Where are you, Sehun?” she screamed, knowing nobody would hear - knowing nobody would answer. “Where are you?”

 

“Beautiful,” he’d said as he put his hands on her cheeks, wiping tears that were not yell spilling over, mirroring his and following their path down his cheeks. “Beautiful, I want to rest at our field. Could you do that for me?”

 

She started shaking her head again, unable to move her head completely because his hands were gripping her so tightly. Then he embraced her and shushed her as he rocked her gently against him.

 

“I know it’ll be hard, but I know you’ll be able to do it,” he whispered as a sob crept out of his chest. “I’ll trust you to do that for me.”

 

When they’d found Xiumin, she’d felt so happy, because Xiumin was the oldest member of the team and he could help them all calm down - especially the younger ones, like Soo and Jongin.

 

Now, she wished she could punch his face over and over again because he’d prevented her from saving him - how could he? How could he do that to her?

 

How could he have let her lose him?

 

But she’d managed to make some damage, after all, and she felt immensely proud of herself: she’d clawed at his face while screaming like a lunatic, using her whole strength as she did it. Thankfully, she lasted long enough, not letting Soo and Suho take her away until her nails - and his face - were the color of blood.

 

Would he have felt proud? She looked at her fingernails, as red as the fire Chanyeol had lit her up with to melt the ice Xiumin had trapped her in, and she felt dirty.

 

She knew he wouldn’t have approved; he would’ve laughed at her and said she was above such carnal and animalistic desires.

 

“Baekhyun…” she tried again. “I think, if I were born again, I would be a star.”

 

He grinned at her, probably wanting to say something sneakish and narcissistic, but she shushed him by putting a finger on his lips. “That way, I could always light up the darkness. If you ever got lost, you would seek my light, and you’d keep coming back to me for warmth.”

 

Now he finally turned - the air in the room was too serious for him to keep being playful. He started to say something again, but she was not done.

 

She took a deep breath, a tear making its way down her cheek - how did it get there in the first place? This was a happy moment. Why was she crying?

 

When they’d found Chanyeol, she’d felt so happy, because he was lost in the woods of Arizona, sleeping in some ancient ruins and not knowing who he was or what he was supposed to do.

 

Now, she cursed him for not having burned Tao so severely that he wouldn’t have been able to do what his crazy head had ended up planning for.

 

Junmyeon had told him he wouldn’t be able to control his powers - he’d showed him how hard it was to even summon up a drop of water, let alone do something as huge as he’d wanted to do.

 

But Tao was an immature child, a sobbing mess which couldn’t believe their stories, no matter how hard they tried to explain them to him. He just kept shaking his head, saying how No, hyung would never betray them like that, how he knew him better than that, how there had to be some kind of explanation and how he was going to find it all out himself.

 

Why hadn’t she held his hand in hers more tightly? Why had she let him let go of it, when she hadn’t even managed to memorize the feeling of his warmth? Why hadn’t she held on and ran with him?

 

At least they would’ve been lost together.

 

Now, she was utterly and completely alone, and she had to somehow get used to the fact that things would stay that way.

 

“Why are you saying such things?” she asked desperately as she weakly hit his chest. “I told you that you won’t die here! If you die, I’ll die too, so you mustn’t die and leave me alone here!”

 

He pulled back for a second, and the way he looked at her broke her again. Why were they crying when they were together and happy? Why were they talking about some kind of parting when they were locked in a tight embrace, one they’d never let go of?

 

“You’ll never be alone,” he said as he swirled a lock of her hair around his finger. “I’ll always be with you, beautiful. Close your eyes.”

 

She did as he told her, even though she didn’t want to take her eyes off him ever again - even for a second.

 

Everyone was too busy with trying to bring Tao back from the ledge to notice them flying towards them and landing at the back of the roof.

 

Baekhyun was standing with her at the back, a protective arm around her waist as they tried to figure out how they could help. Tao was one of Baekhyun’s closest friends, but he was out of his mind, and he would’ve only made things worse if he’d approached him.

 

She should’ve made him do that - get to the safety of the others. Tao would’ve seen Kris and he wouldn’t have done the crazy thing he’d intended to do.

 

Then they wouldn’t have been able to take them away, regardless of Xiumin’s betrayal.

 

He’d approached her later, but she did not register his presence - she was floating in the water, her head barely above the surface.

 

She wanted to close her eyes and drown.

 

“If I were a star,” she continued, “I’d be the closest thing to you, always humming to your power, always thrumming in your veins. I’d be able to live for millions of years, just like you.”

 

He closed his eyes as his hands found hers and he pulled her towards him. “Life is too short for you humans… You don’t get to live even a century. A century is just the blink of an eye for me - it means nothing, lasts only for a second.”

 

“Aeri,” he said as he brought her face towards hers, nudging her shoulder gently with his cheek. “If you were a star, you wouldn’t be able to be with me all the time. I’d have to go and search for SM, but you’d stay at one place, waiting for me.”

 

She laughed out loud as she sniffed - was she still crying? She was such a crybaby. “I’d always be waiting for you. Even if I was far away, you’d look at the part of the sky where I was and see my light. That way, you’d never get lost - you’d always know how to find your way back to me.”

 

Tao was not getting better as the day passed - instead, he ate less and less and didn’t speak to anyone, instead leaving his room only when they’d managed to locate the next lost member and they had to leave.

 

Now, she wished she’d barged in on him while he schemed his crazy plans and made him change his mind. She wished she’d paid closer attention to him and talked to him before it was too late.

 

But it was too late. When they’d found Chen and the sudden eclipse began to emerge, everyone was frozen but him - he was the only one who could control time, the only one who could make it stop and enjoy the view.

 

Instead, he’d decided to throw himself off the ledge, believing it would help him turn back time far enough to stop Kris from ever going to that planet and falling in love with that girl, triggering all of the other events.

 

Suho was busy with making Chen remember his past - Jongdae was trying to reach his power, making a thunderstorm erupt at the outskirts of the town.

 

“Tell me what you hear,” his velvety voice sang to her.

 

“Your beautiful voice,” she immediately replied, making him kiss the top of her nose.

 

“Focus, beautiful. What do you hear?”

 

She heard… the song of birds who were welcoming the spring. She heard the wind rustling the newly-formed leaves of the trees in the woods. She heard the bees, dancing around them and shedding pollen all around them, unknowingly helping the nature all around them.

 

She heard the sound of his breathing. She heard the sound of his heartbeat. She heard the phantom of many, many sounds - his laughter, always his laughter at the center of it all.

 

She heard her own heart, matching his. She heard a butterfly’s wings flapping together as he came over to where they were sitting, hidden in the grass of an Arizona forest, secluded from the whole world and with the whole world only for themselves.

 

She wished they never had to go back.

 

She wished the moment never ended.

 

The moment Kris grabbed him, she should’ve screamed - that way, everyone’s attention would’ve shifted to where they were standing.

 

Instead, she just gasped, not understanding what was going on, why the two fugitives were back, what it meant-

 

She could not move. She looked at Luhan - it had to be him who was controlling her mind like this, but he did not look like he was doing anything. Why was she frozen?

 

“I’m sorry,” Minseok said as she looked at her body, which was now frozen. She was still holding Baekhyun’s hand, and he looked at his face - it was expressionless, as if this was something he’d half-expected would be happening.

 

As Kris pulled him away, she still couldn’t speak, because she was completely frozen - she could only blink in panic as she wanted to do something, anything to help him.

 

“I’m sorry,” Minseok said again, but she did not care about him. The only thing that mattered was that Baekhyun stayed with her - but would things ever be that easy?

 

“And I’d always come back to you,” he’d told her as he kissed her forehead and wiped away her tears, though it was pointless, since more came out immediately to replace them. “I’d never make you wait for too long, because without Aeri’s light to shine on me, I’d be lost and alone and afraid. So I’d be this boring comet who’d keep coming back as it revolved around my star, seeking warmth and light and love.”

 

She giggled. “I’m so happy, Baekhyun. Is it a sin to be this happy?”

 

He just grinned at her before he kissed her more gently, but more intensely than ever before.

 

Aya and Baekhyun were at the back, together with Soo and Jongin. Lay was saying something to Tao in Chinese, but it obviously wasn’t working. Sehun was trying to hold still, but she knew it was hard for him to do so - his hand kept squeezing and letting go of hers, as if he couldn’t decide whether he should stay put or whether he should go over there and bring him back before he did something crazy.

 

Chanyeol was begging Tao to step back, to talk with them. He assured him they’d work out everything, but not if he threw himself into the empty space and ended up dead - because his powers wouldn’t work, and even if they did, it wouldn’t be in the way he wanted.

 

He could get lost in time; he could stay trapped in some unknown dimension forever, and what good would that do to anyone?

 

“I have to save hyung,” he whimpered. “I’m sorry, but I have to save him before it’s too late.”

 

He closed his eyes and spread his arms.

 

She screamed.

 

Tao started falling backwards.

 

The hand holding hers had let go a couple moments ago already - why was her hand suddenly so cold?

 

Why was the whole world so cold now that he wasn’t next to her anymore?

 

“Whenever you miss me, just close your eyes, beautiful,” he said as he kept wiping her tears away, tears that would not stop falling. She couldn’t open her eyes - if she did, she’d just fall apart, and this was supposed to be a happy moment.

 

“You’ll hear me in the wind, whispering about my love for you.

 

You’ll hear my laughter in the sound of the spring grass swaying on the wind, dancing to its melody.

 

You’ll hear the song of our love every time you flick your fingers and make the wind rustle the leaves.

 

I’ll always, always be with you, beautiful. Even when I’m gone.”

 

His eyes were terrified, but even as Kris pulled him away, he smiled at her. It was a sad smile of a prisoner sentenced to death; it was the smile of the lost, frightened boy she’d fallen in love with.

 

Then the bracelet snapped as his hand let go of hers.

 

And then he was gone from her vision.

 

She was gone.

 

“In my life, no happiness ever came for free,” he said as he kissed her temple. “But I’ve already suffered so much, I’ve begun to think that maybe the time has come for me to be happy for a little while.”

 

He laughed sadly as she finally found the strength to open her eyes. “But nothing good lasts long, you know, Aeri? We don’t even recognize that we have something until we lose it. Only then do we start to cherish it.”

 

“Then I’ll cherish you immediately, so that I don’t have to lose you to realize it,” she said, hiding her head in the hollow of his shoulder as she cried.

 

“Oh, but it doesn’t work that way, Aeri. The destiny finds us, no matter how much we run from it, just like you said.”

 

She did not understand what she was seeing before her eyes.

 

She did not understand why Sehun was running towards Tao, who was falling.

 

She did not understand why, instead of Sehun pulling him back onto the ledge, they both disappeared from it.

 

She did not understand why, when they came back an eternity later, they kept shaking their heads at her, saying their bodies were not anywhere to be found.

 

She did not understand how he could’ve gone away without a goodbye.

 

But he did give her one - just before he’d reached Tao, he’d turned towards her briefly, looking at her apologetically, as if he knew what was going to happen. As if he begged her not to blame him for trying to save his friend.

 

And then he smiled at her.

 

“Someday, when you’re old and enough time has passed, I hope you’ll come to visit me,” he had said. “I hope you’ll still guard the Earth’s Tree of Life, just like you first wanted to.”

 

She kept shaking her head, not able to form words because she was sobbing too loudly, without any form of control.

 

“I hope you live a happy and a fulfilled life, beautiful.

 

If I could choose, I’d stay with you - I’d want nothing else but to spend a lifetime with my miracle and then say goodbye to this world.

 

But if I can’t stay…

 

I hope you remember me, beautiful.

 

Because I will. Even when I’m gone.”