“Tell me what is wrong with her, Yixing!” Sehun roared, not allowing himself to feel or think about anything. He couldn’t focus on anything except for the sleeping girl on the bed in front of him.

 

“I don’t know, Sehun - I said I don’t know! I can’t feel anything!” Lay seemed out of his mind, too - he put his head in his hands as he sobbed, though he wasn’t crying. He felt bad for a second - maybe they were pushing the guy too far these days. It’d only been a week or so since they’d found him, after all - even if he wanted to, it would’ve been hard to tune into his powers, and he did want to help people, with his whole heart.

 

Soo patted Lay on the back. “It’s okay, Yixing. You’d help if you could; there’s no need to feel bad about it.”

 

Sehun focused on the matter-at-hand again as he paced the room. “Tell me again - what did she keep saying again and again - you said it was something about a punishment and avenging? What does that even mean?” She was as still as a statue. He had the urge to be beside her, to check for her pulse every couple of seconds, but he’d meant what he’d said about being done and this wouldn’t change anything. Just because his words hurt her, didn’t mean that he had to go back to someone who didn’t love him.

 

“Well, maybe if you were there and not running away like a chicken you would’ve actually heard-” Jongin started, but was quickly cut off by Junmyeon.

 

“Jongin, it’s enough. This is no time for such arguments - we have plenty more important things to solve first. Maybe we should all get out and let her get some rest - if she wakes up now, she’ll probably just be frightened from hearing us fight over nothing. It’s a huge mess even without all of this.” Suho looked so very tired - the bags under his eyes were almost purple now. Sehun would’ve been worried, but the only thing he could worry about was her. What was going on in her head?

 

He thought about the day when he’d really remembered her - not as the main character of his dreams, but as the person he’d loved and promised he’d never leave.

 

“I have a last gift for you, Sehunnie,” Luhan had said as he approached him. He started coughing, which struck Sehun as strange - the guardians never got sick.

 

The worry disappeared when Lu smiled, shaking his head. “You see, I’ve been watching over you for more than a year, taking care that nothing went wrong. But now the time has come for you to remember again, because she will remember, too, and you will need to guide her through the darkness, Sehunnie.”

 

Sehun had no idea what his friend was talking about - was this another Chinese joke he didn’t understand? He laughed while his friend approached him with a sad smile. “Yeah, Lu, thanks but I think I’m fine-”

 

Luhan cut him off as he put his hand at the top of Sehun’s head. Why would he do such a thing? But Lu was a friend, and he’d never hurt him, so Sehun didn’t protest.

 

“She will have to fight, Sehunnie, and you need to help her, okay? I’m sorry that I won’t be there but you will manage to do it without me. There is a way - you just need to guide her with your love. Remember this well, my friend, and farewell.”

 

Farewell? Fight? He won’t be there? What nonsense was his friend saying now?

 

“Lu-” Sehun started, not sure what he’d say-

 

And then he was overwhelmed with memories of April grass, sunshine, butterflies, the feeling of her, her eyes, her scent, her power, and the whole world was her.

 

Not long after that, he’d found out Luhan had kidnapped Aya and led her into some kind of a maze inside of their base at the dark side of the Moon. They all knew it was some kind of a trap, but they had to save her - Baek had begged them, and he never did that, at least not since those messed-up freaks had tortured him out of his mind, making him forget almost every single memory he had of life.

 

Entering the maze robbed them of all of their powers, and even cut most of them from their essence so much that they couldn’t move. Sehun was driven by the power of remembering, by the will to ask Luhan why he’d done something so horrible after giving him such a beautiful gift. Where was he planning on going to? Why would he go anywhere? And would Lamiya be fine? Why would she remember him? His mind was spinning from so many riddles he had to solve.

 

Sehun had so many questions, so even though it was hard, he got up and left to search for Luhan with Kris, one of the strongest and the best seeker out of all of them.

 

Unsurprisingly, Suho and Soo were strong enough to be able to function normally, too, though they weren’t able to use their powers, just like everyone else. Since Baekhyun was driven with mad anger, and Soo was the one who’d helped him the most after he was rescued, Suho ended up going with Kris and Sehun. They were bound to find Luhan because of Kris’ tracking ability - on the other side, Baek would be able to cool off without causing any harm to anyone, including himself.

 

How wrong they were. Back then, he did not know it, but that was the whole point - to get them as far away from Luhan as possible, because Baekhyun was not capable of protecting Aya from anyone. Did Kris want to tell him about Lamiya’s decision then, too, or was that something he hadn’t planned for, something she just gave to him regardless of his true intentions?

 

Lamiya. Every time she crossed his mind, his heart broke - the creases were now so profound that it was a matter of days before it shattered and he lost his mind.

 

But he would not think about his emotions now. First he had to save her. Was this what Lu warned him about? When he’d first saw her in Edinburgh, after Suho had made him remember who he was, she looked tired, but otherwise healthy. Sane. He thought that maybe, just maybe this time they were lucky and the bad premonitions didn’t come true.

 

But of course, things had to go wrong at one point. This didn’t mean she was going to go crazy, though - perhaps this was something Lay would be able to heal.

 

An hour later, all of his hopes were taken away by the wind.

 

As soon as she opened her eyes, he knew something was very wrong with her - the look inside of them wasn’t soft, like when he’d kissed her in the grass for the first time, but wild and disturbed. Her curly hair was not neat or rustled by the wind he sent to her as they embraced - now it was a wild mess framing her face, which was masked into a strange grimace.

 

When she spoke, all of his doubts turned into reality. “I saw you, Sehunnie,” she said as she pointed a finger at him and grinned widely. “I saw you in the desert and you woke me up!”

 

The blood in his veins froze when she laughed. It was not the melodic laughter she’d recognize anywhere - this was the laughter of a madwoman. “And now I can finally find SM and avenge my wounded pride, because he had taken away my power my power my power!”

 

Then she threw a ball of wind at Lay, and he only barely managed to react in time to change its course. But wasn’t her - his, to be precise - power now in Kris’ hands? How could she control it to such an extent now?

 

“And he will finally pay for it pay for it” she sang, now seemingly harmless again, perhaps even unaware of her surroundings as she looked at the ceiling and turned her head towards the side, as if seeing something that wasn’t there.

 

Sehun looked over at his friends: Lay looked absolutely terrified, and him and Jongin didn’t seem like they could quite understand what was going on. Baekhyun was holding Aya’s wrists, and it looked like he was trying to prevent her from going near Lamiya to make her sleep.

 

Suho and Soo were looking at each other, as if not sure what to do. Sehun didn’t know either - if he made the others go away, how would he help her? But if they stayed, she could hurt some of them, and apparently badly because of her madness-induced powers.

 

He’d decided he would make the others go away and stop putting themselves in danger when she stopped humming. “Oh Sehun,” she said in a voice that didn’t even sound like hers, “Thank you for saving me. I will give her back to you for some time, but when the time comes, I will have my revenge and you will not stand in my way.”

 

The two stared at each other, and now he saw a completely different person inside of her - it was an evil, angry presence with some old grudge who had somehow gotten into what he still liked to think of as his. He was now angry; if he’d really freed something, how dared it do something like this?

 

He started shaking her unresponsive form. “You stay away from her, you hear me? If there’s someone you want to hurt, then hurt me - but leave her alone!” His voice was afraid and desperate, no matter how hard he tried to make it sound stoic and calm.

 

She just laughed loudly, still staring at him with a dangerous look which held promises of pain. He did not like it one second.

 

Then she was unconscious again, and he couldn’t move away from her or stop his arms as they held her and tried to help her with their touch, with his whispers of It’s okay, beautiful, you’ll be fine, and with the eyes that would not cry, that would not betray that he was so afraid that he’d never get her back, even though technically, he wasn’t even supposed to care.

 

It wasn’t long when she woke up again. Nobody had said a single world since she’d out, and Sehun was grateful for that. If they voiced it, then he would have to acknowledge it was real - this way, he could keep reassuring himself that this had something to do with her hitting her head on the stone on that day such a long time ago, that it would pass and that she would be perfectly fine after she got some rest.

 

He was running his hands through her hair, cradling her head in his lap as she slowly blinked her eyes open.

 

They were the eyes of spring, the eyes who’d wanted to stay and protect the Earth - the eyes who had even loved him once… the eyes he had felt the same way about, still.

 

Always.

 

“Hey,” he told her gently, not caring that everyone was there to witness him walking all over his pride and breaking his promises, “You’re here now. It’s okay.”

 

Lu had told him to protect and guide her, and he’d do that, even if it meant losing his soul and giving her his heart to break and walk all over. He just needed her to be fine.

 

“Hey…” she blinked uncertainly. “Where am I? How did I get here?”

 

Did she not remember anything again? Good - that way she would not be in danger of going crazy again. He hated that it’d happened at all, even though it was for such a short time.

 

Then she seemed to realize who he was, because she moved away from him quickly, averting her gaze. He did not prevent her from doing so - she was not his to take care of anyway. “But wasn’t I… In the desert? At your home planet?”

 

The blood in his veins froze again - so she was still crazy? He suddenly couldn’t breathe.

 

Suho seemed to have had new ideas for helping her mental health. “Why would you be there, Lamiya? You’ve been with us in Edinburgh for at least a week. You know all these things, right?”

 

She started massaging her temples. “I’m not sure, Junmyeon… I think I was experiencing some kind of a flashback, though I’m not sure how it’s possible, since it seems very, very old, but I felt as if it had happened to me.”

 

“What kind of a flashback?” Jongin asked hesitantly, half-hiding behind Suho. Sehun was thankful for having them, because he would’ve gone crazy himself had it been only his task to try and make sense out of all of this.

 

Lamiya shook her head, closing her eyes. “I saw… a woman, at Sehun’s home planet. She was waiting for someone, I think he was supposed to give her powers back to her or something…. But he never arrived.” She paused, as if trying to remember the rest, though it had happened only an hour earlier. “Then she asked The Tree of Life to leave her alive by giving her a bit of its essence, and she stayed… asleep for millions of years. Then Sehun woke her up. That’s all I’ve seen.”

 

Suho nodded. “And you don’t remember waking up… a couple of minutes ago or anything like that?”

 

Sehun made a very impatient sound, because things were very delicate and they had no idea when she could go to the crazy-land again, but thankfully, it didn’t trigger anything like that. “No… Why? Did I wake up and start saying some nonsense or something?”

 

Now it was Sehun who answered her. “No, we were just checking if you were fine. Now everyone, leave - I have something I need to talk to her about.”

 

Her eyes were filled with surprise, just like his heart - but what would he say? Was there even anything he could say to make things better? And what did making things better even mean?

 

He did not dare look at her as the others slowly left, some grinning - like Baekhyun, whereas some were concerned - like Soo. He nodded at his concerned leader, trying to let him know that he wasn’t going to fight with her - at least he hoped so. “Get some rest, Junmyeon,” he told him softly, hoping he’d stop worrying about everything at least for a second. They would find Kris and the others, and they would refill on time. Then they’d go back here and finish things with SM once and for all.

 

But now, all of those goals seemed a million light years away, because they were alone in the room and there was so much he wanted to ask at her, not having the courage to open his mouth. He looked anywhere - everywhere but at her, because if he’d looked at her, he would’ve fallen apart then and there. There would be enough time for that - he needed to know first.

 

She didn’t even give him a chance to start, as he stood beside her bed, looking at the floor. “Listen, Sehun, you don’t have to act like you’re concerned about me. I know you don’t care anymore, so if you think Soo or Junmyeon will hate you because of that, I’ll talk to them-”

 

“Do you love him?” he voiced before he could stop himself.

 

He was never more afraid of anything than her answer in that moment.

 

Lamiya sighed, and he died a little. “It doesn’t matter, but no, I don’t love Kris. You know that.”

 

“Then why did you… why would you…” he struggled to finish, still not able to breathe. “Your power, why did you give it to him? And don’t try to lie, because you have to want to for him to be able to take it from you.”

 

He felt so small, though he was so much taller than her - how was it possible that she held all of the strings in her hands, that she was able to end him with a single flick of her hand, if only she wanted to?

 

She snorted. “What’s wrong with you, Sehun?” she said coldly. “Did you expect me to encourage them to cut your liver out? Should I have demanded to do it myself? How can you ask such a question in the first place?”

 

“What?” This was a bait, he knew - she was probably an agent of Kris’ who still had some messed-up mission to accomplish and he was falling for her games. Thankfully, the wind was with him today, so if she tried to do anything fishy, he’d just start strangling her. “What are you talking about? Why would anyone be cutting my liver out?”

 

She tightened her hands into fists, seemingly getting angry over something he did not understand. “So now you’re just going to claim it’d never happened? You know what, I give up - you’re seriously impossible and I can’t do this anymore-”

 

“Tell me,” he growled as he put both of his hands on her shoulders, struggling not to start shaking her again - was she crazy again? Had he already lost her?

 

He was desperate for a gasp of air and he could still not get it. “Tell me why you gave him your power, now.”

 

She tried to shake his hands off her, and when she didn’t succeed, she looked at him with annoyance and anger. “Did you forget about them torturing you? About you begging them to stop over the phone?”

 

As soon as she felt his grip relax, she swatted his arms away, not giving him the chance to recover from surprise. “I know you hate me because I’m not the person you fell in love with, Sehun - I’m sorry that I gave him the powers you’d so generously sacrificed in order for me to be able to survive. But, I gave him the powers because he threatened to do awful things to you if I didn’t,” she whispered into his face, her eyes now a spring rain that was falling on him, melting the snow and giving life to the nature that had fallen asleep when the whole mess had started. “And I’d do it again, even though I’d lose you again like this. Now let me go.”

 

His mind didn’t even manage to process what was going on when his body started acting on its own - it wouldn’t listen to his commands anymore, no matter how many times he tried to command it and make it stay calm.

 

His lips were on her in an instant, her warmth breaking the ice he was frozen in ever since Luhan had erased their memories, and as he closed his eyes, he finally realized what had happened.

 

She hadn’t broken her promise. She hadn’t given Kris her powers because she’d loved him, as a promise of love - breaking the promise he’d given her in the process.

 

She’d done it because she thought they were hurting him and she’d wanted it to stop.

 

She’d tried to save him by giving up on the one thing that one wouldn’t have wanted to part from - the power to control the wind.

 

He could finally breathe again.

 

His hands kept touching her face as they kissed, as if trying to verify that she was real, that she loved him, that they both had their memories back and that things would be fine, somehow.

 

He was still so worried about her - what did the flashbacks mean? He was alone at that planet - there was no woman there. He hadn’t saved anybody but himself and the butterfly. It must’ve been some fake implanted memory of SM’s, or it was some kind of brief hallucination she’d forget the next time she woke up.

 

They’d work it out somehow - now all he could do was drown in her scent as their tears mixed and he was finally free again, finally with her again, finally home again.

 

They’d found each other, even after having their memories erased.

 

She was the one - not a treacherous witch, as he’d thought many times, but the beautiful creature he’d fallen in love with, the creature that shouldn’t have existed, the creature whose smile lit up worlds and started and ended wars.

 

She was still his miracle.

 

Even after having had her memories erased, she still fell in love with him, just like he did. He hadn’t understood the dreams he kept having, with her as the main character. He hadn’t understood why he felt like she could control the wind, having even briefly witnessed such a thing. He thought he was an SM undercover agent, there to play with his mind and feelings as he was forced to watch her be with his best friend instead.

 

As he was forced to feel poisonous jealousy and another feeling he couldn’t understand - the wanting for her to be his, gasping in his arms like she was now, while he brought them as close as possible, not wanting to ever forget this feeling.

 

He would never lose her again. Lu said there was a way, so he’d find it, regardless of what it took. He’d take her madness if he could - he’d heal her if it was possible.

 

He intertwined their hands as he kissed her again and again, chasing a feeling that would not go away, that was always theirs, that was their promise to stay together regardless of everything - even if it meant they had to break the laws of time and space.

 

“I love you,” she whispered against his mouth, and what he said to Lay about wanting to die, about not being able to be complete ever again, disappeared. How could such a small creature hold him under her power like this?

 

Why was his whole body shaking as he kept kissing her, not wanting to part, not wanting to see the tears streaming down his face as he hid at the hollow of her shoulder, a sobbing mess that was falling apart from sorrow, that was falling apart from happiness?

 

“I know, Sehunnie, I know,” she whispered in his hair as she embraced him tightly, her voice thick with tears, too.

 

He was never this happy in his whole life.

 

He would never lose her again.

 

Instead, he would lose himself in her again and again, as her scent washed over him and her hands tangled in his hair, her laugh the only sound he could hear. It would keep resonating through his mind forever - until he was a pile of bones carried on the wind. Even then, he would remember her.

 

Even when he lost himself, when everything disappeared and lost meaning, she would remain.

 

Now, all that was left was her smile as he pushed her on top of him and lost himself in a sea of curls, spring and the wind, taking away his heart and all coherent thoughts.

 

If he'd been able to talk, he would’ve voiced the words that his mouth silently formed.

 

The words he knew she could hear, even if he never said them out loud.

 

I love you, beautiful. I love you so much.