Before you read this chapter I would like to apologise for the super super late update! I had an exam that went on for 3 days and I had an assignment due today and all these things keep coming. There is now also a language competition going on and I’ve just been super busy. When I get free time I just wanted to relax and draw and read. So I haven’t been writing. I have been procrastinating and I feel so guilty knowing some of you are waiting for this chapter. I have been working on this chapter for 2 weeks. I’m so slow! I wrote this chapter a bit longer, it’s 6 pages long so hopefully you guys can forgive me. WARNING: I haven't proof read this yet! There will be a lot of mistakes. I was rushing to upload this chapter so I didn't proof read. Deep apologises

--------------------------------------------------------------

Tae’s POV:

“I’m happy for you.”

Shatter

“Really? I thought you felt the same way.”

I do.

“Of course not Chim. You’re such an idiot. Kookie is a friend.”

The colours are fading…

“Haha I guess I was nervous for nothing.”

“Don’t worry Chim. I’m cheering you on! Fighting!”

My world is monochromatic again…

——————————————————————————-

“Morning Tae!” Jungkook smiled at me.

“Morning Ko-Jungkook”

His smile immediately faded. I’m sorry Kookie. But Jimin likes you, Jimin has done so much for me. He was always there when I need someone’s shoulder to cry on he was always there for me. He always supported me so I can at least support him.

I feel this way yet somewhere deep inside me is yelling for Jungkook. Somewhere inside me is screaming to forget about Jimin. Somewhere inside me is wishing for happiness. But I have to let go. Good bye my first love.

—————————————————————————

“Tae let’s eat lunch together!” Jungkookie asked me. He looks so happy. My lips unconsciously curl into a smile. No I can’t. I quickly wipe the smile off my face. I quickly stuff my books in my small black bag.

“Sorry Koo-Jungkook, I need to go.” I said with my head hung low. I don’t want to see his hurt expression so I quickly rush out.

“I’m sorry”

——————————————————

“i’m home” I said. Of course no one welcomed me. No one ever does.

I walk upstairs to my room. I immediately flopped on my soft bed.

“Ha” I sighed. Images of Kookie flow into my head. They were all happy memories, ones where he smiled his bunny smile. Until the very last face of his I saw was sad and hurt. Before I knew it tears were streaming down my face. I rubbed them as hard as I could but the were flowing non stop. It’s so painful….

——————————————————————

“So Tae..” Jimin said.

“Yes Chim?” I asked as I look up.

“Oh my god what happened?” His face immediately looked worried.

“What do you mean? I’m fine.” I smile at him, not showing my teeth.

“Tae you have eyeballs and your eyes are red and puffy. Are you ok?”

“Yeah I’m fine. I’m probably getting sick. Haha.” I giggled.

It was so fake.

“Make sure you drink lots of water and get some rest.”

“Yeah, I will. So what were you going to ask me?”

“Oh yeah, umm. You know how you said you would support me?”

“Of course.”

“Umm could you do me a favour?”

“Sure what do you want me to do?”

“Could you um..ask Jungkookie to go on a date with me to ****shopping centre?”

“Why can’t you ask him?”

“Well you see…It’s still kind of awkward between me and him..”

“Oh, I see. Sure I’ll ask him. Just the two of you?”

“Umm…actually could you come as well? It would be weird if you asked him but you didn’t come.”

“Ok”

———————————————-

It’s now break and Jungkook is sitting across me eating his lunch. I look to my side to see Jimin literally begging for me to ask him. My eyes look back at the younger who was still eating his noodles.

“Ummm hey Jungkook ah.”

“Yeah?” He asked coldly. He seems so distant.

“Me and Jimin are going shopping this Sunday, do you wanna come?”

“Shopping?”

“Yeah, we were thinking of having some fun.”

“Why would you want me to come?”

His word stabbed me painfully. What happened to my once happy smiling Kookie?

“Jimin wants all three of us to hang out.”

“What time”?”

“Around 10 at ******shopping centre.”

“Ok, I’ll come.”

“Great. See you there.”

——————————————————-

Sunday, Jungkook’s POV:

Honestly I feel as if Tae has been quite distant ever since the night we went to the movies together. Did I do something wrong? I don’t remember us arguing about anything. What did Jimin tell him?

I arrived at the shopping centre half an hour early as usual. Few minutes later I spotted JImin running towards me with a bright smile on his face.

“Jungkook! You’re early.”

“Yeah, I tend to arrive early.”

“Hmmm? Where’s Tae?”

“He’s not here yet.”

“Oh I see. Would you like to grab some drinks while we wait?”

“Sure.”

We booth grab milk tea at a near by bubble tea shop. We started talking about the new Avengers movie we well me and Tae and Jimin stalking us saw.

———————————————————

Tae’s POV:

Oh my god! My train is freaking 10 minutes late!!!! As soon as I reach the shopping centre, I rush to the food court we were suppose to meet at. I looked around for 5 minutes but still can’t see either Jungkook or Jimin. I walked around for another 5 minutes and I spotted them sitting together laughing while drinking milk tea. I could feel my heart clench at the sight. Soon they’ll be like that right? Laughing together, holding hands, hugging, kissing…….. I felt something cold and ticklish run down my face.

I’m crying again

I quickly fix myself before walking over.

“Hey guys. I’m here now.”

“Finally! What took you so long?” Jimin asked with a slightly angered yet disappointed expression.

“My train came 10 minutes late.”

“Well let’s go. Where do you guys want to go first?” Jungkook asked.

“I don’t really mind….”

“Oh! How about we go buy some clothes?" Jimin suggested.

“Sure let’s go”

——————————————————

“How about this Jungkookie? Do you think it’ll look nice on me?”

 “Yeah. It’ll look great.”

“Ok, I’ll go change.”

We’ve been shopping for clothes for ages. Kookie and JImin seem to be having fun. I can’t afford these clothes so there’s no use of shopping for them.

“Tae? You’re not gonna buy anything?” Kookie asked me.

“Ah no. I don’t need anything.”

“You sure? We could shop somewhere else if you’re bored.”

“No, it’s fine.”

“Ok then.”

I sat down on one of the chairs in font of the change rooms. Jimin and Kookie are just trying on some clothes. We’ll go to the food court to get some lunch after. Jimin came out with a light grey sweater.

“How do I look?”

“You look great! It looks nice on you.”

“Thanks Tae. For coming today.”

“No worries.”

“Tae you’re not buying anything?”

“Nah, I’m fine.”

“Ok, I can get you something if you want.”

“No I’m fine. Really.”

“I’m gonna change out of this now then. Let’s go get some food.”

“Sure take your time.”

Not long after they both came out with clothes in their hands. Jungkook finished paying for his stuff. He ran up to me and me a beaded white bracelet with a small charm in the middle.

“It’s for you Tae.” He flashed his bunny smile.

“Kookie! I told you I didn’t need this” I gasped at the realisation of his nickname I called him. It has been so long since I’ve called him that.

“You finally called me by my nickname again.” He muttered, trying to hide what he said but I heard him loud and clear. Don’t you know Kookie? I have been calling you that all the time in my head.

“I got myself one as well.” He stated as he held up another bracelet but it was black.

“You really didn’t have to get me anything.”

“I wanted to. Now wear it,” He said as he grabbed my hand and slid the bracelet onto my wrist. The cool feeling hitting against my skin felt nice and soothing.

“Thank you.”

I’ll treasure it forever.

“You’re welcome.” He smiled.

“Ok guys. Let’s go get some food.” JImin suddenly said.

“Yeah! Let’s go!” Jungkook yelled as he lifted his arm in the air, his hand clenched into a fist.

————————————————————

I sat down on a small quartz table in the middle of the food court. I was munching on my fries until I was greeted by Jimin’s tray hitting the table. He had a bowl of Udon soup.

“What are you eating Tae?”

“Just Macca’s”

“Oh I see.” He said as he reached out to grab my fries.

“Hey!” I yelled. He only giggled in response. We both ate in silence for a minute.

“You having fun?” I asked.

“Yeah, I’m glad I can spend some quality time with him.”

“That’s great….”

It was silent again.

“You bought a bracelet.” Jimin said as he looked at my wrist.

“Yeah, well technically Jungkook got it for me.”

“Oh? That’s nice…”

AH!!! I’m such an idiot! I shouldn’t be saying these things when I clearly know how he feels about Kookie.

“Hey guys what did you guys buy for lunch?” Jungkook asked.

“I got Udon.”

“I got Macca’s.”

“I got Tacos!”

“Unfair! Let me have some!” Jimin yelled as he reached out for Jungkook’s tacos.

“No!” Jungkook said as he held Jimin’s hand, stopping him from touching his precious tacos. Jimin looked down and he saw Jungkook’s bracelet. His face immediately darkened. He must feel betrayed. His eyes turned glossy, his nose and ears are red. He’s about to break. I should leave before I turn this date worse.

“I’m gonna go home now.” Jimin looked up to me. Hie tears are more visible. His eyebrows knitted together. He looked like he was in pain.

“What? Why?” Jungkook asked.

“I-I’m not feeling well.”

“Do you want us to come with you?”

“No, it’s fine. You two still have some stuff to buy right? I can manage.”

“If you say so…”

Jimin was quiet.

“Bye Jungkook. Bye Chim…” He never answered.

I walked off feeling my heart clench for the a thousandth time. This is so painful.

 

 

 

 

 

 

But I can manage.

 

 

 

 

On my way home I dropped by the chemist. I need something to help me through this pain. I walked up to the shelves to get a jar of stress pills. This should do it.

——————————————-

As I walked inside the house I was greeted by a slap. The sound kept on ringing in my heard. I guess I’m gonna get new bruises today.

“WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN KIM TAEHYUNG?!” Mother screamed at me.

“Out….”

“WHERE?! WITH WHO?!”

“Shopping with my friends….”

“YOU LITTLE PIECE OF !!!” She yelled while pushing me to the ground, kicking me.

This pain is so familiar. This physical pain though can never be compared to the pain burning in my heart. What have I ever done to deserve this? Why is it that God hates me? Why can’t my parents treat me as their child? Why does my best friend have to like the same person as me? Why can’t I be loved? Tears start to stream down my face yet again.

After hours of kicking, slapping, punching, She finally let me go. I grabbed a glass of water and ran to my room. I slammed the door close and instantly took the small bottle out. I poured out a pill and swallowed it down with water. It soothes my pain just a tiny bit. I close my eyes. Feeling the pain calming down. I open my eyes only meet my monochromatic world. There’s no colour, no sunshine, no happiness. Just black and white. A lonely monochromatic world.

Before you read this chapter I would like to apologise for the super super late update! I had an exam that went on for 3 days and I had an assignment due today and all these things keep coming. There is now also a language competition going on and I’ve just been super busy. When I get free time I just wanted to relax and draw and read. So I haven’t been writing. I have been procrastinating and I feel so guilty knowing some of you are waiting for this chapter. I have been working on this chapter for 2 weeks. I’m so slow! I wrote this chapter a bit longer, it’s 6 pages long so hopefully you guys can forgive me.