It was a bit ironic that I was finally starting on my own vacation itinerary on the day I was supposed to return to Seoul. 

Baekhyun was seated across me, bouquet still proudly in hand, though both his smile and posture were a bit stiff. Of the two weeks we spent together, I'd not seen him this uncomfortable. Not even on the night I confronted him with slippers in a duel. Baekhyun was sipping on his cup of Iced Americano silently while I nibbled on the same part of my bagel for the tenth minute straight. 

We'd each scrutinised a different part of the restaurant's decor way too intensely, avoiding the elephant in the room. Or more specifically, the elephant on the table, lying there between our coffee cups and hanging like a bad smell neither of us wanted to address. The keychain, otherwise known as "farewell-gift-turned-confession-surprise", was almost glowing under the unnecessarily warm and cozy lighting of the cafe. We were both shifting uncomfortably in our seats while barely drinking the already lukewarm cups of coffee on the table. 

To put it simple, it was awkward. 

I wasn't sure how I should broach the topic of my spontaneous confession. It was quite obvious that I had almost jumped him in my attempt to stop Baekhyun from reaching his apartment, and the last thing I needed Baekhyun to think was that I was so in love with him I would attack him to profess my undying love. Reaching into his pocket to get the keychain was definitely violating his personal space, and I wasn't sure if Baekhyun wanted to have me arrested instead. 

"So...you want to talk about it?"

Of course Baekhyun was the braver one between the two of us. 

"About what?" 

Baekhyun actually managed a snort and shrugged, effectively breaking the stale atmosphere with a single gesture. 

"I don't know. I have my own guesses as to where this confession comes from, but I want to hear it from you," Baekhyun said calmly, "I don't want to make assumptions." 

I eyed him carefully, not sure whether this was a trap or a clear road for me to steer. One wrong step and it would be like quicksand, swallowing me into the depths of hell where my embarrassment and shame can hug me for life. 

"So you do have some ideas?" 

Baekhyun nodded hesitantly, as if afraid I would be offended. 

"I want to hear what you think instead. And I would tell you if they're right." 

Baekhyun took another sip of his drink, and I could not imagine why he would be as nervous as I was. Surely the person confessing should be more apprehensive than the recipient of the confession? The blonde hazarded a guess that I could tell head been in his mind for a while now. To be fair, his conjecture was perfectly, objectively, and justifiably sensible. It still didn't mean that I wasn't mildly offended and affected by it though. 

"I thought something happened with your ex-boyfriend." 

I scoffed, loudly and instinctively. 

As I said, it was reasonable for him to think so, because just two weeks ago I was crying day and night, moping over my long-lost love and the cruel wedding updates that popped up on my social media timeline. Yet a part of me was bitter that after days of hanging out closely, sharing our respective views on love and so many issues, Baekhyun thought of me as someone who would use him as a back-up. For someone who hid under his girlfriend's bed, Baekhyun's perception of my irrationality stung, and it hurt. It was brief, but it was deep. 

Another part of me whispered in the corner of my already-tired brain. 

You underestimate yourself, Baekhyun. I may just really like-

"I'm sorry, you're better than that," Baekhyun added when he noticed my lag in responding, "that's the last thing you would do. I think I was just more concerned something bad might have happened again. I mean, you're supposed to be on the train now, I'm supposed to be in the apartment like we planned, and you seemed really...zealous when you said everything to me just now."

I smiled, the resentment in my fading along with Baekhyun's words. 

It surprised me that when I said this had nothing to do with Henry and the wedding, I was genuine about it. The decision I made was motivated by nothing but Baekhyun's feelings and the potential consequences if he met Minho. Henry was the last and least of my worries, and I actually smiled when I told Baekhyun that. Letting go was a much better feeling than I had expected it to be. 

Baekhyun, though happy for me, looked like he was conflicted. 

"So...you really do like me?"

I do-

I avoided the question. Instead, I dropped a proposal. 

"Just one day, Baekhyun. Let me loan Suzy's time with your for one day. I'm serious." 

"Jisoo, it doesn't work that way-" 

"I don't intend on destroying your relationship Baekhyun. One day is all I ask for." 

The bustling in the cafe became more apparent as silence interrupted our conversation once again. 

"This is not healthy, Jisoo." 

"So was hiding under a bed-"

"But sure." 

Damn. 

And also dammit brain, what was I thinking. 

-❤-

Of course the tiny evil voice in my head decided to go to Jayu Park, where flowers are blooming and Baekhyun is as far away from possibilities of meeting Suzy as possible. I had a few plans: 

a. Push him into a bush if Suzy appeared. 

b. Knock him into a tree trunk so that he faints and misses Suzy if she ever appeared. 

c. Honestly this place is so far away from where he stays she just wouldn't appear.